Intimacy or lovemaking does not have to get boring in a long-term marriage. As the years pass by and you get older, your intimate relationship must get better. Sex with your partner can become more satisfying because you know each other’s preferences, likes, dislikes, and habits.
You know that life can get in the way. Work, children, finances, and several issues can dampen the romance. These everyday factors can hamper both your desire for sex and getting the time to put in the effort. But do not put sex on a shelve or last to-do tasks. There are ways to prioritize lovemaking and keep it healthy and exciting.
In today’s article, Delhi’s top Marriage Counsellor and Founder of Saarthi Counselling Services shares tips for couples to maintain a healthy and exciting marital life intimately.
Create boundaries around your immediate or nuclear family. Include individual, couple, and family time built into your daily life and pre-defined lines of connection with each partner’s family. This means you have clear boundaries around how much time you spend with your and your spouse’s family. Your own relationship and family should be the first priority.
Touch Each Other Whenever You Can
Have a well-established connection around non-sexual physical touching, holding each other’s hand, laying together, and sitting on the couch with each other. Touch each other often. Make a routine to kiss when saying hello and bidding goodbye every day.
Say I Love You To Each Other
Hearing the three magical words I love you can make you feel reassured about the way your partner feels about the relationship with you. It is a small gesture that can keep your connection alive. Call each other during the day to say it if you missed your chance earlier in the day.
Set Date For Love Making
Have consistent physical intimacy dates. Having a frequent sexual relationship in your marriage is essential. Couples in the 20s have sex an average of 2 to 4 times a week. Couples in the 30s normally do it twice a week and couples in the 40s and 50s usually have it once every week. Pay attention to the frequency at which you are having sex. Try not to be sexually intimate less than twice a month, because you may get into a habit that does not give priority to connecting in a physical manner. Maintaining your physical connection provides your marriage staying power and safeguard it from the stresses of life. Make time either spontaneously or planned, to follow through with consistent lovemaking and intimacy. Your sexual relationship should be a tension reducer, not a tension builder.
Compliment Your Partner
Compliment your spouse in front of others. Not only it is a good thing to do, but it also helps your spouse feel a deep sense of attachment to you and boosts their self-esteem. It’s also good to model for your kids so that they see you being complementary to each other.
Change The Pattern Of Your Love Making
Try often to make love using a distinct sexual script. By mixing up your normal order of kissing, foreplay, and intercourse, you can reconnect in a great way. By mixing up the script, you take ownership of pleasure and excitement in your marriage. Nothing is better than feeling desired and having a partner who takes control of the sexual relationship.
Regularly Treat Each Other
Regularly give your partner small gifts or show gestures of love and care. Leave your spouse a loving note, get them a special treat when you go shopping or come back from office. Write I love you on a slip and keep it in their cupboard. Pay attention to these small but moving gestures.
Arrange Weekly Dates
Plan weekly dates to keep the spark in your connection. Also, arrange weekly business meetings to discuss professional life or including the division of roles and household responsibilities, weekly plans, and other matters that need to be discussed. By keeping these conversations apart, date night can be about connecting, talking, and getting physical, while organizational business night can be about work-related problem-solving and working as a team during the week.