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What’s the Essence of Self-Care for You and Your Relationship?

Self-care is often viewed as a luxury, but it is, in fact, a necessity for maintaining both personal well-being and healthy relationships. In today’s fast-paced world, taking time to care for oneself is essential to manage stress, enhance emotional health, and maintain physical fitness.

Moreover, self-care significantly impacts how we interact with our partners and can be a cornerstone for a thriving relationship, says one of India’s leading marital and family therapists Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

What is Self-Care?

Self-care involves any activity that we deliberately engage in to take care of our mental, emotional, and physical health. Simple activities like exercising, reading a book, meditating, or even taking a break from social media can be forms of self-care. By prioritizing these activities, we replenish our energy and reset our minds, which is crucial for managing day-to-day stressors effectively.

What is the Impact of Neglecting Self-Care?

When we neglect self-care, it often leads to burnout, irritability, and emotional exhaustion. These states can adversely affect our relationships, leading to misunderstandings, conflicts, and a lack of intimacy. For instance, when an individual is constantly stressed and exhausted, they may become short-tempered and less patient, making it difficult to communicate effectively with their partner. Conversely, when we are well-rested and emotionally balanced, we are more likely to approach our relationships with patience, understanding, and empathy.

What about the Self-Care and Boundary Setting?

Self-care is not only about personal health but also about setting boundaries and learning to say no. This is particularly important in relationships where individuals may feel pressured to constantly meet their partner’s needs, often at the expense of their own well-being. By practicing self-care, individuals learn to balance their own needs with those of their partner, leading to a healthier and more reciprocal relationship dynamic.

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What are the Possible Benefits of Self-Care for Relationships?

For relationships, self-care has a dual benefit. Firstly, it ensures that each partner is functioning at their best, contributing positively to the relationship. Secondly, it sets a precedent for mutual respect and understanding. When one partner sees the other taking time for self-care, it can inspire them to do the same, fostering an environment where both individuals feel valued and supported.

What are the Outcomes of Shared Self-Care Activities?

Engaging in self-care together as a couple can also strengthen the bond. Activities like taking a walk together, cooking a healthy meal, or practicing mindfulness can be ways for couples to connect and support each other’s well-being. This shared commitment to self-care can enhance intimacy and create a deeper sense of partnership.

Self-care is vital for both individual health and the health of relationships. It allows individuals to maintain their mental, emotional, and physical well-being, which in turn makes them better partners. By prioritizing self-care, we can manage stress more effectively, communicate more clearly, and nurture our relationships more lovingly. Therefore, integrating self-care into our daily routine is not just a personal investment, but a commitment to fostering healthier and more fulfilling relationships.

best marriage counselor in delhi_shivani misri sadhoo

How Couples Can Rebuild Trust in a Relationship? Expert Advice

In our rapidly evolving era, where love can feel fleeting and relationships are often tested by societal shifts and technological influences, trust remains the cornerstone of every bond. Despite the pain of betrayal, some couples endeavor to mend their fractured trust and move forward together.

Rebuilding trust after infidelity or other breaches requires commitment from both partners, as distrust can erode the foundation of intimacy and connection.

What are the ways for couples to rebuild trust in a relationship?

Top couples therapist and marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares a few tips and tricks to rebuild that lost trust in a relationship.

Find out the Real Reason

Perhaps the primary step towards addressing a breach of trust in a relationship is introspection to understand the underlying motivations.

It’s imperative to honestly assess why the breach occurred, whether it was due to unmet needs, a desire to end the relationship, or simply a mistake.

Avoiding manipulation, gaslighting, or blaming one’s partner is crucial; instead, taking ownership of one’s actions and explaining intentions sincerely is vital before attempting to rebuild trust.

A Sincere Apology

A sincere apology lays the foundation for rebuilding trust. It involves acknowledging betrayal with honesty and remorse, promising to end the affair and prevent its recurrence. Daily reassurances and expressions of love reassure the wounded partner.

Empathizing with their pain demonstrates understanding. Transparency and authenticity underscore the commitment to repair. A genuine apology signifies a willingness to go the extra mile to mend what was broken, offering hope for a stronger bond.

top couples therapist in delhi_shivani misri sadhoo

Honest Communication

Open communication is essential for rebuilding trust in a relationship. It cultivates honesty, transparency, and understanding between partners.

By openly discussing feelings, past mistakes, and expectations, couples can learn from the past and set new boundaries.

Sharing thoughts, fears, and goals helps to rebuild connection and intimacy. Honesty and transparency are crucial; hiding, lying, or withholding information only undermines trust further.

Regular, positive communication promotes mutual respect and appreciation, paving the way for healing and rebuilding a stronger bond.

Forget and Forgive

Indeed it is not easy to forget and forgive your partner’s mistake, yet when you let go of grudges, you free yourself from emotional toxicity and pave the way for healing. Focus on self-renewal rather than resurrecting the past.

Recognize that every relationship, even after betrayal, offers new lessons and opportunities for growth. If trust has been breached, practicing forgiveness is pivotal, acknowledging that it’s a challenging but empowering choice.

Grant your partner the benefit of the doubt, assuming their commitment to mend what was broken. Forgiveness becomes a gift to yourself, fostering the possibility of rebuilding trust in the present moment.

Patience

Patience and understanding are key to rebuilding trust in a relationship. Both partners must acknowledge that restoring trust takes time, with setbacks along the way. It’s crucial to respect each other’s pace in processing the betrayal, avoiding pressure for immediate discussions.

The unfaithful partner’s efforts to impress and make amends must be consistent but not rushed, as genuine change requires time. Seeking guidance from a counselor can provide unbiased support during this process.

Ultimately, both partners must stay positive and believe in long-term change, fostering a sense of mutual commitment and reassurance in the journey towards rebuilding trust.

Revival of Lost Spark

Restoring intimacy in a relationship post-breach of trust is a chance for a fresh start. By understanding each other’s needs and actively fulfilling them, we rebuild the foundation of love, safety, and support. We honor their pace and comfort, allowing them to initiate intimacy.

Starting with a gentle touch, you gradually progress to sensual and physical intimacy. Attentive to their cues, you focus on mutual pleasure, nurturing trust through genuine connection.

Life is a journey of growth and resilience. Rebuilding trust in a relationship demands introspection, sincere apologies, honest communication, forgiveness, patience, and a revival of lost intimacy. Through mutual commitment and understanding, couples can emerge stronger, cultivating a deeper connection built on honesty, empathy, and love.

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What to do if You are Married, but Attracted to Someone Else?

Did you know that it is perfectly normal to have feelings for another person even while you are married? These brief infatuations with another person are part of human nature, rooted in our brain chemistry. However, these feelings do not reflect anything about your marriage, your spouse, or the person you’re having a crush on.

While such feelings can add thrill and excitement to your life, they might also bring feelings of guilt and fear. Do not worry. Here are certain things that are being explained in this blog.

why I am feeling attracted outside marriage

What do you need to do when you are married, yet are attracted to someone else?

Eminent couples therapist and marriage counsellor in Delhi, Shivani Misri Sadhoo is here to tell you what you can do when you are married but have a crush on someone else.

Accept your Feelings – Perhaps the first and foremost step in getting over your crush while married is to acknowledge and accept your feelings. Recognizing that crushes are a natural part of the human experience and do not signify a lack of love for your spouse or a failing marriage is crucial.

By admitting your feelings to yourself, you can take active measures to manage them, preventing them from leading to a potential affair. This self-awareness empowers you to gain control over your emotions, rather than allowing them to dictate your actions, ultimately helping you to move past the crush.

Reflect and Reconnect – When you’re married and having a crush on someone else, reflecting on your marriage is crucial. It helps you understand the potential consequences of acting on those feelings. Assessing what you stand to lose reminds you of the value of your relationship and the life you’ve built together.

Additionally, it prompts you to consider if the person you’re attracted to is truly worth jeopardizing your marriage. Furthermore, reflection may uncover underlying issues within your relationship that need attention. This introspection can lead to open communication with your spouse, strengthening your bond and addressing any areas for improvement.

Stay Away from Your Crush – Any kind of temptation is hard to resist, especially when it involves someone outside of your marriage. When you have a crush on someone, the best course of action is to create distance. While complete avoidance may be impossible, limiting contact is crucial. Setting clear boundaries and sticking to them prevents the crush from escalating.

Reducing interactions gradually diminishes the intensity of feelings over time, safeguarding the sanctity of your marriage. By prioritizing distance, you prioritize your commitment to your spouse and ensure the crush doesn’t jeopardize your relationship.

Set Clear Boundaries – Familiarity can intensify feelings and blur boundaries, potentially jeopardizing a marriage. It’s important to establish clear boundaries in such cases. By maintaining distance and limiting interactions with the crush, you prevent the escalation of emotions. Sending mixed signals only fuels confusion and potential misunderstandings, complicating matters further.

The sooner you recognize that managing a crush is solely your responsibility, the better it will be for you to avoid such behaviours that could harm your relationship. Communicating openly with your partner about boundaries reinforces trust and commitment. Remember, prioritizing your marriage means actively safeguarding against the allure of a crush and steering clear of actions that may compromise the relationship’s integrity.

Honest Communication – We all know that communication is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. When you have a crush on someone else while you are married, it is quite natural to feel guilty or embarrassed about these feelings, but keeping them secret only intensifies the struggle. By openly discussing your emotions with your spouse, you’re acknowledging their importance and seeking understanding.

This transparency not only strengthens trust but also cultivates a deeper connection. While the conversation may feel awkward, it’s an opportunity to strengthen the bond between you and your partner. By confiding in them, you’re not only sharing your struggles but also inviting their support and perspective. This honesty can breathe new life into your relationship, allowing both of you to overcome challenges together. Ultimately, open communication lays the foundation for surmounting obstacles and reaffirming your commitment to each other.

It is evident from this article that it would be wise to acknowledge and accept your feelings, reflect on your marriage, maintain distance from your crush, set clear boundaries, and communicate openly with your spouse. These steps strengthen bonds and safeguard relationships.

work stress relationship intimacy relationship tips

How to Protect Your Intimate Relationship from the Impact of Work Stress?

In today’s busy and competitive world, where life revolves around the clock, maintaining a healthy relationship can definitely be challenging. Many of us must have experienced the suffocating grip of stress from work, feeling its corrosive effects on our relationships like a sour lemon in the face. However, amidst the chaos of deadlines, demanding colleagues, and relentless shift patterns, there exists a path to safeguarding our intimate connections. Let’s find out from relationship expert and eminent couples therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo ways to protect your intimate relationship from the impact of work stress.

Stress is highly contagious. That’s why when you are feeling the stress, it is obvious that your partner too will feel it indirectly. Sometimes this becomes too intense and is called crossover workplace stress where partners share and amplify each other’s work stress, showing how emotional burdens transcend individual experiences, says leading couples therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

How to protect your intimate relationship from the effects of work-related stress

What are some ways to protect your intimate relationship from the effects of work-related stress?

Shivani Sadhoo says the below-mentioned pointers will help you to manage your intimate relationship effectively.

Identify the stress first – Recognizing your partner’s stress signals is crucial for maintaining a strong connection. It allows you to understand their struggles and provide much-needed support. Changes in sleep, eating habits, mood, or energy levels are key indicators.

Since women may display stress differently than men, attentive observation becomes even more vital. By acknowledging their stress, you open avenues for support, fostering resilience and strengthening your bond.

Separate our professional life from personal life – While it may be quite difficult to disconnect yourself from work in this hyperconnected world, it’s crucial to establish clear boundaries between your professional and personal life. Designate specific areas at home as work-free zones like the bedroom or yard.

Also, schedule work-free times during the day with regular breaks and a fixed end time in the evening. This proactive approach enables couples to support each other’s emotional needs without sacrificing their own well-being, ultimately nurturing a healthier and more resilient bond.

Communicate – Effective communication is vital in nurturing intimate relationships. By openly discussing work stress with your partner, you cultivate understanding and patience, preventing misunderstandings. Sharing concerns and supporting each other builds teamwork and unity.

Establishing a safe environment for expressing emotions strengthens intimacy. Regular check-ins enable honest conversations about challenges, nurturing a deeper connection. This mutual sharing of burdens and vulnerabilities creates a strong foundation for intimacy to flourish.

The right choice of words – Choose your words carefully, for they are the bridge between hearts in times of relationship stress. When emotions run high, allowing your partner to express themselves without judgment fosters understanding. Accusations, exaggerations, or insincere compliments only deepen wounds.

Engage in discussions with empathy, avoiding defensiveness, to navigate stress as a team. Equally crucial is monitoring your tone; its pitch, volume, and pace convey more than words alone, shaping the emotional landscape of communication.

Offer help/support – Supporting your partner during times of stress is crucial for maintaining a healthy relationship. By sharing your feelings with trusted individuals, such as friends or therapists, you can alleviate the emotional burden on your partner.

Understanding their needs and communicating yours nurtures mutual support and prevents resentment. Listening without judgment cultivates compassion and strengthens the bond, aiding in healing past wounds and building a resilient partnership.

Look after yourself – Taking time apart from your partner, even amidst isolation, is crucial for self-care and a healthy relationship. Whether it’s a brief solo walk, separate workspaces, or pursuing individual interests, this distance allows for recharge and alleviates shared stress.

It fosters independence, preventing mutual overwhelm, and nurturing fondness through the adage, “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” Stress and strain are unavoidable companions in our modern lives, often infiltrating our intimate relationships. However, by recognizing and addressing the impact of work stress, couples can fortify their bond.

Through effective communication, setting boundaries, and offering support, partners can navigate the tumultuous waters together. By prioritizing understanding, empathy, and self-care, they forge a path toward resilience and deeper intimacy, safeguarding their relationship amidst life’s chaos.

what is emotional cheating in relationship

What is Emotional Cheating? —A Guide to Mending Broken Trust

Love is a wonderful feeling. When we love someone deeply, we open ourselves up to vulnerability, trusting them with our hearts and our deepest emotions. However, with this vulnerability comes the risk of betrayal, and one of the most painful forms of betrayal is emotional cheating. So, what is Emotional Cheating and how can we mend this broken trust? Delhi’s leading marriage and family therapist, Shivani Misri Sadhoo answers your question in this article.

What is Emotional Cheating?

Definition–Emotional cheating refers to forming intimate emotional bonds outside a primary relationship, breaking trust and boundaries. It doesn’t involve physical intimacy. Instead, it occurs when we develop strong feelings for someone outside of our committed relationship. Signs include secrecy, confiding in another, flirtation, and neglecting the partner’s needs.   

Emotional Cheating is not the same as Platonic friendship. In a platonic relationship, the emotional connection is significant, but it lacks the romantic or sexual attraction that typically defines a romantic relationship.

How does it happen? Innocent friendships can escalate into emotional affairs, often involving co-workers, exes, online friends, or seeking solace during relationship issues.

What is Emotional Cheating?  A Guide to Mending Broken Trust by Shivani Misri Sadhoo

What is the impact of emotional cheating on the primary relationship?

Impact on primary relationship: It damages trust, weakens emotional closeness, suggests less commitment, and may lead to physical cheating, similar to infidelity.

What are the Signs of Emotional Cheating?

  • You confide in someone else about your relationship issues instead of discussing them with your partner, breaching trust and intimacy.
  • You feel excited while interacting with this person. This indicates a potential emotional connection beyond friendship.
  • You deliberately conceal or minimize the depth of your bond with this individual from your partner, betraying transparency and honesty.
  • There’s flirtatious behaviour with an underlying romantic or physical attraction, crossing the boundaries of platonic friendship.
  • This person fulfils your emotional needs in ways your partner doesn’t, leading to dissatisfaction and comparison, wishing your partner were more like them.

What are the ways to mend this broken trust in relationships and marriages?

Mending broken trust after emotional cheating requires a concerted effort from both partners. It’s not easy, and it takes time, patience, and a willingness to confront difficult emotions head-on. Here are a few ways by which this is possible:

Accept your mistake – One of the crucial steps in rebuilding trust after emotional cheating is admitting and owning up to your actions. Accepting responsibility without excuses or blame shows genuine remorse. Validating your partner’s feelings and creating a safe space for them to express emotions freely nurtures healing and rebuilding trust.

Completely disconnect – When your partner decides to end the relationship due to emotional cheating, it signals seriousness. They must cut off all contact with the third party, allowing verification. This means blocking, avoiding encounters, and setting clear work boundaries if the affair was with a colleague.

Honest communication – Communication is the cornerstone of relationships. Honest, open dialogue is crucial for addressing emotional cheating. It creates a safe space for expressing feelings, rebuilding trust, and sharing perspectives. Through dialogue, partners understand each other better and can work towards healing the relationship.

Try to regain trust – Share your hopes, dreams, and emotions openly with your partner. Plan special dates to reconnect without distractions. Listen actively and empathize with each other. Rebuild trust after emotional cheating through open communication and intentional gestures of love.

Forgive and forget – It may be difficult to forgive and forget, yet it’s vital in overcoming emotional infidelity. It’s not just about pardoning your partner; it’s about releasing self-blame. Forgiveness liberates, empowering you to move forward and enabling relationship recovery.

Now that you understand emotional cheating and how to mend broken trust, remember: that honesty, communication, and forgiveness are key to rebuilding a stronger, more resilient relationship.

dating tips what woman wants by couples therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

Little Things Single Women Want On A First Date

Have you ever found yourself on a first date, heart racing, palms sweating, desperately wishing for an escape route in case it all goes south? It’s a rite of passage in the world of dating, where both parties are often teetering on the edge of excitement and anxiety, wondering if this encounter will lead to something magical or just another story to laugh about later. First dates can be tricky. What works for you may not work for the other person.

Little Things Single Women Want On A First Date

What do women really want or expect on their first dates?

Shivani Misri Sadhoo, the leading relationship counsellor and couples therapist in Delhi, is here to guide you with those little things that single women want on a first date.

Punctuality – Punctuality on a first date speaks volumes about your character and consideration. Arriving on time demonstrates respect for her schedule and shows maturity and responsibility. It conveys your value for the date and sets a positive tone. Conversely, being late can start things off poorly. Communicating any delays or emergencies promptly showcases courtesy and thoughtfulness, reinforcing your respect for her time.

Honest Conversation – On a first date, single women seek authentic conversations because they want to truly understand their date. They crave depth beyond rehearsed lines, desiring genuine connections that reveal the person’s essence. Meaningful discussions, where both parties share openly and listen attentively, allow them to assess compatibility and determine if they want to pursue the relationship further. It’s about understanding each other on a deeper level.

Being Polite – How would you feel if someone you’re meeting for the first time forgets basic manners? Probably not great, right? Well, women appreciate politeness because it shows respect and consideration. Small gestures like holding doors open or chewing with your mouth closed make a big difference. Plus, avoiding gross or inappropriate topics shows you’re mindful of her comfort and boundaries.

Avoid Staring at Your Phone Always – One of the banes of dating in a digital era is the constant urge to check social media notifications, no matter where you are! But, if you’re constantly glued to your gadgets on the first date, it sends a signal that you’re not fully present and excited about meeting someone new. The thrill of a first date lies in the anticipation and getting to know each other.

If your attention is elsewhere, it’s like saying, “You’re not that important.” Nobody wants to feel ignored or disrespected, especially on a first date where the goal is to connect. Unless it’s an emergency, keeping your face buried in your phone sends the wrong message—it’s a surefire way to kill the vibe and potentially ruin what could’ve been a great conversation.

No Fake Compliments – It goes without saying that on a first date, women seek genuine compliments that come from the heart. They don’t want to feel like someone’s just throwing out empty words to impress them. When they sense insincerity, it makes them feel like their autonomy and boundaries are being compromised, especially if they feel their safety is at risk.

Instead of just sweet-talking, showing sincere interest and affection by complimenting traits that truly matter to you, like her smile, hair, or outfit, can go a long way. If you’re going to call her beautiful, make sure you truly mean it—it’s the sincerity that counts.

Simple and Smart – Women appreciate simplicity and intelligence on first dates. Genuine conversation, thoughtfulness, and sincerity are valued over extravagant displays. Overconfidence and insincerity are major turn-offs, creating discomfort.

Authenticity is key; any hint of pretence disrupts the atmosphere. It’s about feeling relaxed and comfortable, not impressed by theatrics. Simple gestures make for memorable and positive experiences, setting the stage for genuine connections.

While it is true that first dates can be nerve-wracking, focusing on punctuality, genuine conversation, politeness, presence, sincerity in compliments, and simplicity sets the stage for a meaningful connection, fostering mutual respect and understanding.

how to deal with cheating husband

How To Deal with A Cheating Husband?

How would you feel when you accidentally find out that your husband, whom you love dearly, is cheating on you? Once the initial shock wears off, you may find yourself cycling through various emotions, much like the stages of grief. Initially, there’s disbelief and perhaps a reluctance to accept the reality of the betrayal. Then, as the truth sinks in, pain and anger may set in.

But why do people cheat?

From a lack of attention or affection to deep-seated insecurities, the motivations for infidelity are myriad. It’s not just about physical transgressions; emotional betrayals cut just as deep. While men may reel more from physical infidelity, women often place a high value on emotional fidelity. So, what would you do in such circumstances? Should you forgive him or ignore it completely and let bygones be bygones?

how to deal if you find out that your husband is cheating

How do you deal with your cheating husband?

India’s top marriage counselor, Shivani Misri Sadhoo answers your question in this article.

Verify The Facts First

First things first. Before jumping to conclusions, it’s crucial to gather solid evidence if you suspect your husband is cheating. Your gut feeling might be telling you something’s off, but you can’t accuse him without proof.

Take time to investigate: Is it innocent chatting or something more? Could it be work-related? Figure out the nature of his relationship with the other person. Look for concrete evidence like messages or meeting details before confronting him. Confirm your suspicions before taking action because wrongly accusing him can harm your relationship trust. It’s better to be sure than sorry.

Try and find out the reason

Once you’ve gathered the facts, exploring the real reason behind your husband’s infidelity is essential. It might be tough to ask and even tougher to hear, but understanding the root cause can be pivotal in moving forward.

It could unveil hidden relationship issues needing attention or reveal feelings of neglect or dissatisfaction. An open and honest conversation about infidelity’s catalyst can offer clarity and aid in both of your healing processes. Keep an open mind during this discussion to prevent your husband from shutting down or merely telling you what you want to hear.

Consider Your Feelings

When you discover your partner’s unfaithfulness, it’s important to prioritize your emotional well-being. Consider whether you feel comfortable sharing a living space with them as you process this betrayal. It’s okay to need space to think things through. If necessary, arrange for separate sleeping arrangements to give each other room to reflect. Take time to acknowledge and mourn the loss of trust in the relationship. Creating a safe environment to process these emotions is vital for your healing journey.

Don’t Look Back

There is no point in endlessly replaying conversations or questioning every detail when dealing with a cheating spouse. It’s natural to feel betrayed and wonder about what else may have been hidden, but dwelling on the past only leads to negativity and mistrust. Instead, focus on moving forward and healing, looking towards the future rather than getting stuck in hypotheticals. By working through the stages of healing and eventually forgiving both your partner and yourself, you can find peace and rebuild trust in your relationship.

Don’t involve the children

It is not wise to discuss your husband’s infidelity with your children. While it may seem tempting to seek revenge by exposing his actions, it can deeply affect your kids. They might not understand the complexity of the situation and could be scarred emotionally. Involving them could also make them feel scared and insecure about the stability of their family.

It’s important to shield them from this pain and turmoil. Keep things as normal as possible at home and refrain from involving extended family to avoid gossip and division. Instead of seeking revenge, focus on your own healing and well-being, for the sake of your children’s happiness and security.

It is quite clear from these steps that addressing infidelity in a relationship requires patience, understanding, and prioritizing emotional well-being. By verifying facts, exploring reasons, focusing on healing, and protecting children, couples can navigate this challenging journey with empathy and grace. If needed, seek support from a relationship counsellor or psychologist for guidance and resolution in processing and healing from infidelity.

impact of social media on relationship by Shivani Sadhoo

Do You know what are the Social Media Red Flags In Relationships?

The internet has indeed revolutionized the world. Gone are the days when information was scarce and communication was slow.

Today, with just a few clicks or taps, we can delve into a vast repository of knowledge on virtually any topic and connect with individuals worldwide in an instant. Social media, in particular, has streamlined the process of finding romantic partners, transcending geographical boundaries and time zones. Yet, amid its convenience, social media has also become a breeding ground for relationship issues. The same platforms that bring couples closer together can also harbour hidden red flags that may signal trouble ahead.

To understand these social media red flags, let’s explore the perspective of top relationship expert and marriage counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo on the social media behaviours that should not be ignored in relationships.

impact of social media in relationship by marriage counselor Shivani misri sadhoo

What are the social media red flags in relationships?

Couples therapist, Shivani Misri Sadhoo says to find out you need to check the following signs:

Pretending to be single

When a partner behaves as if they’re single on social media—keeping relationship status hidden, avoiding posting photos together, or asking not to be tagged—it raises red flags. While some value privacy, constant avoidance of mentioning the relationship may indicate keeping options open or a lack of commitment. Genuine partners don’t hide relationships; secrecy may suggest dishonesty, embarrassment, or external pressure. Openness and acknowledgement are essential for healthy relationships.

Is your partner spending too much time on social media?

Spending excessive time on social media during dates can detract from romance, signaling that your partner’s focus isn’t on you. It may indicate addiction, where the virtual world overshadows real connections. Social media’s curated facade fosters dissatisfaction and can be an escape from unhappiness. Ignoring moments like sunsets hints at prioritizing screens over shared experiences. Recognizing these signs is crucial; excessive social media use can signal deeper issues affecting relationships and personal well-being.

Posting flirtatious remarks on others’ social media posts

Flirting with others on social media, especially through public comments, signals a lack of commitment and respect in a relationship. This behavior undermines trust and emotional security, akin to infidelity. Engaging in such actions can lead to feelings of betrayal and hurt. Consistently leaving flirty comments on others’ posts raises doubts about one’s intentions and loyalty. It’s crucial to reflect on whether this behavior aligns with your expectations for a healthy, monogamous relationship.

Not accepting social media requests

Many a time, refusing to accept a connection request on social media signals reluctance to integrate into each other’s lives. It suggests a lack of transparency and openness. Denying the request may indicate a desire to keep aspects of one’s life hidden, potentially signaling dishonesty or unfaithfulness. By rejecting the connection, the partner may be implying a disregard for the relationship’s importance or the other person’s feelings. Overall, refusal to connect on social media can raise concerns about trust and commitment.

Reluctant in posting your relationship online

Some people choose privacy, but when a partner avoids posting about the relationship on social media while being active otherwise, it raises concerns. The absence of acknowledgment could signal a lack of commitment or reluctance to publicly affirm the relationship. This omission may lead to feelings of exclusion and impact self-esteem negatively. Comparing one’s relationship to others’ flashy posts only emphasizes the authenticity of real-life connections.

Inconsistent behavior or mismatch between online and offline conduct

When someone’s online persona is drastically different from their offline behavior, it can raise concerns about authenticity and honesty in a relationship. While it’s common for people to curate their online presence to some extent, a significant inconsistency like this can be a red flag. For instance, imagine if your partner constantly shares posts about loyalty and trust online, but in reality, they frequently lie to you about their whereabouts or interactions with others. This mismatch between their digital facade and real-life actions could erode trust and breed resentment in the relationship over time.

Ideal narriage age for Indians to lower divorce risks shares Shivani misri Sadhoo

Ideal Marriage Age for Lowering Divorce Risks

Decodes Relationship Expert Shivani Sadhoo

If you thought that simply finding the perfect partner guarantees a happily ever after, think again. Love alone doesn’t shield us from moments of unhappiness or regret in marriage. As time passes, these moments can linger, potentially leading to the painful decision of separation or divorce. But what if I told you there’s a crucial factor that could significantly reduce the risk of divorce? According to relationship gurus and psychologists, timing matters just as much as compatibility—if you’re eyeing a divorce-free future, marry at the right age. Yes! Age matters!

Let’s find out more about this from India’s leading marriage counsellor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo. Getting married too young can lead to divorce. But waiting too long, which isn’t as long as you might think, can also cause problems.

Why you shouldn’t marry in your teens or early 20s?

Scientifically speaking, the human brain isn’t fully developed until the mid-20s. So, you’re still figuring out a lot about yourself and what matters to you. The risks associated with early marriage are:

  • Young people lack the experience and maturity to understand themselves and their goals in life. So, they rush into a relationship only to end up marrying the wrong person. This leads to a painful divorce.
  • Early marriage often means starting a family sooner, which can pose financial challenges as young couples may not have stable careers or sufficient income to support themselves and any potential children.
  • Marrying early can interrupt educational pursuits, limiting career opportunities and economic stability in the long run.
  • Young couples may have unrealistic expectations about marriage and their partner, which can lead to disappointment and conflict when reality does not meet their expectations.

Why you shouldn’t wait too long to get married?

Studies reveal that marrying after 32 increases your risk of divorce approximately by 5% every year. The reasons could be:

  • Baggage from Past Relationships: You might still have emotional stuff from previous relationships.
  • Complex Family Situations: You might have kids from previous relationships, making things more complicated.
  • Money Matters: Managing finances can be more challenging with established careers and responsibilities.
  • Career Stress: Jobs can demand a lot of time and energy, which might strain your relationship.
  • Midlife Crises: In your late 30s or 40s, you might start questioning your life choices, which can affect your marriage.
  • Changing Priorities: As you get older, what you want from life might change, causing conflicts with your partner.
  • Kids Leaving Home: When your kids grow up and move out, you might realize issues in your marriage that were hidden before.
  • Trouble Communicating: Over time, it might become harder to talk openly with your partner, leading to misunderstandings.
  • Cheating: Though it can happen at any age, affairs might be more common in your 40s, hurting your marriage.

What’s the right age to marry?

Studies reveal that getting married between the ages of 28 and 32 is linked with a lower chance of splitting up within the next five years. This age range seems to be just right for a few reasons.

  • Maturity: People in this group tend to be more grown-up and less carried away by emotions. They’ve been through enough life experiences to handle tough situations better.
  • Not so rigid: At the same time, they’re not too stuck in their own habits to compromise.
  • Financial Stability: They often have enough money and stability to handle marriage without extra complications like ex-partners or kids from previous relationships.

So, all in all, this age range brings a good balance of maturity, flexibility, and financial security to make marriage more likely to last.

We must remember that there is no one-size-fits-all formula for marriage. While statistics suggest an optimal age range for tying the knot, individual circumstances, readiness, and compatibility remain crucial in ensuring a lasting and fulfilling

best family therapist in delhi ncr_shivani misri sadhoo

Strategies to Prevent Parental Relationships From Hurting Your Romantic Life

Navigating the complexities of romantic relationships can be challenging, especially when parental dynamics come into play. While our relationships with our parents are often deeply ingrained and significant, they can sometimes inadvertently impact our romantic endeavors.

However, with awareness and intentional strategies, it’s possible to maintain healthy boundaries and prevent parental relationships from negatively affecting your romantic life, says leading family and couples therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

What are the strategies to prevent your parental relationships that may hurt your romantic life?

According to Shivani Sadhoo, you need to follow the given process that may yield you good results. These are:

Awareness is Key

The first step in preventing parental relationships from harming your romantic life is to acknowledge the influence they may have. Reflect on how your upbringing and interactions with your parents shape your views on love, communication, and intimacy.

Recognizing patterns or behaviors learned from parental relationships can empower you to address them effectively.

Open Communication

Communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship. Be open and honest with your partner about your family dynamics, including your relationship with your parents. Discuss any concerns or boundaries you feel are important to maintain within your romantic relationship.

Establish Boundaries

Setting clear boundaries is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships with both your parents and your partner. Communicate your boundaries respectfully but firmly, ensuring that both parties understand and respect each other’s needs. Boundaries may include time spent with parents, involvement in decision-making, and privacy within your romantic relationship.

Prioritize Your Partner

While it’s natural to value your relationship with your parents, it’s essential to prioritize your romantic partner. Make time for one-on-one experiences and prioritize their needs and feelings. Show your partner that they are valued and respected within the relationship.

Seek Support

If you’re struggling to navigate the complexities of parental relationships and romantic endeavors, don’t hesitate to seek support from a therapist or counselor.

Professional guidance can offer valuable insights and strategies for managing challenging dynamics and fostering healthier relationships.

Set Healthy Expectations

Unmet expectations can often lead to conflict and resentment within relationships. Be mindful of the expectations you hold for both your parents and your partner, and ensure they are realistic and healthy. Recognize that your partner cannot fulfill the role of your parent, nor should they be expected to.

Practice Self-Awareness

Take time to reflect on your own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors within your relationships. Are there patterns or triggers that stem from your parental relationships? Cultivating self-awareness can help you identify areas for personal growth and ensure that past dynamics don’t negatively impact your romantic life.

Cultivate Independence

Developing a sense of independence and autonomy is essential for maintaining healthy boundaries within relationships. While it’s natural to seek guidance and support from your parents, strive to make decisions independently and assert your own identity within your romantic relationship.

Focus on Growth

Relationships, both with parents and romantic partners, require ongoing effort and growth. Embrace opportunities for personal and relational development, and be open to learning from past experiences. Approach challenges with a growth mindset, recognizing that setbacks can lead to greater understanding and resilience.

Celebrate Differences

Embrace the uniqueness of both your parental relationships and your romantic partnership. Recognize that each relationship serves a different purpose and brings its own strengths and challenges. Celebrate the diversity of experiences and perspectives that contribute to your overall growth and fulfillment.

Preventing parental relationships from harming your romantic life requires awareness, communication, and intentional effort. By establishing boundaries, prioritizing your partner, seeking support, and fostering personal growth, you can navigate the complexities of family dynamics while nurturing a healthy and fulfilling romantic relationship.

Remember, every relationship is unique, and with patience and commitment, you can create a partnership that thrives despite any challenges along the way.