Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

The first month of marriage is a unique and exciting time for newlyweds. It’s a period of adjustment, discovery, and laying the foundation for a strong, enduring relationship. Long-lasting couples understand the importance of this time and take specific steps to ensure their bond remains strong as they move forward together. Here’s a look at what successful couples often do during their first month of marriage to set the tone for a lifetime of happiness as shared by Delhi NCR’s top couple’s therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

What things do long-lasting couples do during the first month of their marriage?

According to marriage counselor Shivani Sadhoo, things long-lasting couples do in their first month of marriage are:

Open Communication

One of the most critical aspects of a healthy marriage is communication. Long-lasting couples make it a priority to talk openly and honestly with each other. They share their thoughts, feelings, and concerns, ensuring that they are on the same page. This openness helps prevent misunderstandings and fosters a sense of trust and security in the relationship.

During the first month, these couples often establish communication patterns that will carry them through their marriage. Whether it’s setting aside time each day to talk about their day or discussing their future goals and dreams, they make communication a cornerstone of their relationship.

Spending Quality Time Together

The first month of marriage is a special time to build memories and deepen the bond. Long-lasting couples make the most of this period by spending quality time together. This doesn’t necessarily mean elaborate dates or expensive outings. It can be as simple as cooking together, taking walks, or enjoying a movie night at home.

By prioritizing time together, they strengthen their connection and create a strong foundation for their marriage. This quality time helps them understand each other better and reinforces the love and commitment they share.

Setting Boundaries and Expectations

Every couple comes into marriage with their own set of expectations and boundaries. Long-lasting couples understand the importance of discussing and setting these early on. Whether it’s about finances, household responsibilities, or social interactions, having clear boundaries helps prevent conflicts later on.

During the first month, successful couples take the time to discuss their expectations for the relationship. They talk about their roles, responsibilities, and how they will handle challenges that may arise. This proactive approach helps ensure that both partners feel respected and understood.

Fostering Physical Intimacy

Physical intimacy is a vital aspect of a marriage. Long-lasting couples prioritize this aspect of their relationship from the very beginning. They understand that physical affection is not just about physical intimacy but also about maintaining a close, loving connection.

During the first month, these couples often explore each other’s needs and desires, ensuring that both partners feel satisfied and cherished. They make time for intimacy, whether through affectionate gestures, cuddling, or simply being close to each other. This focus on physical connection helps build a strong emotional bond that lasts throughout their marriage.

Being Supportive and Encouraging

Marriage is a partnership, and long-lasting couples know the importance of supporting and encouraging each other. In the first month, they make a conscious effort to be each other’s biggest cheerleaders. Whether it’s in their personal goals, careers, or hobbies, they offer support and encouragement.

This mutual support helps build a strong foundation of trust and respect. It shows that they are committed to each other’s growth and happiness, which is crucial for a lasting relationship.

Maintaining a Sense of Humor

Marriage comes with its challenges, and long-lasting couples know the importance of maintaining a sense of humor. They don’t take themselves too seriously and find ways to laugh together, even when things don’t go as planned.

In the first month, these couples often face minor challenges as they adjust to married life. Instead of letting these moments cause tension, they use humor to diffuse potential conflicts and keep things light-hearted. This ability to laugh together strengthens their bond and makes it easier to navigate the ups and downs of marriage.

The first month of marriage is a crucial time for newlyweds to set the tone for their future together. Long-lasting couples understand this and take specific steps to ensure their relationship remains strong and healthy. By focusing on open communication, spending quality time together, setting boundaries, fostering physical intimacy, being supportive, and maintaining a sense of humor, they build a solid foundation for a lifetime of happiness. These actions, taken in the early days of marriage, pave the way for a fulfilling and enduring relationship

Have you ever felt unheard, had your emotions suppressed, or found yourself constantly questioning your actions in a relationship? If so, you might be a victim of manipulation. Manipulation involves harmful influence over others, targeting their mental and emotional sides to achieve personal gain.

Manipulators create an imbalance of power, taking advantage of their victims to gain control, benefits, or privileges at their expense. They lie, make excuses, blame others, or strategically share selective truths to feel superior and powerful.

What are the ways to handle a manipulator impactfully?

There are tactics you can use to deal with a manipulator. Top couples therapist and relationship counselor in Delhi, and Gurgaon, Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares a few in this article. 

Do you feel you are being love bombing, and what to do?

When manipulators use love bombing, they shower you with excessive praise, attention, and gifts to create dependence and control. This differs from genuine affection, which seeks nothing in return.

Recognize love bombing by its overwhelming nature, especially early in relationships. Protect yourself by maintaining high self-esteem and healthy boundaries. Be wary of excessive flattery, redirect conversations to objective matters, and focus on facts over emotions. This helps you resist manipulation and maintain control.

Do you think a third person is being involved in how to Avoid Triangulation?

Another form of manipulation in relationships is triangulation, where one person involves a third party to avoid direct communication and manipulate situations to their advantage. To protect oneself, it’s crucial to recognize signs of triangulation early on. Address the issue openly with all parties involved in a group setting to promote clear communication and prevent further manipulation.

Establishing norms for transparent communication and addressing insecurities openly can create a safe emotional environment where both partners feel heard and respected.

Are you thinking you need to draw the limit?

Sometimes, saying, “That’s enough” does the trick. It is important to realize that setting clear boundaries is crucial in dealing with manipulators. By defining what behaviours you will and won’t tolerate, you can offer help without being taken advantage of. Keeping a journal of boundaries helps clarify your thoughts and strengthens your resolve.

Manipulators often exploit weak boundaries, so establishing firm limits protects your emotional well-being. Knowing where you end and others begin prevents manipulation, whether through overly rigid or overly involved boundaries.

Body Language Matters to protect yourself against manipulators

Did you know that your body language can reveal a lot about how you feel, which manipulators might use against you?

When dealing with manipulative people, be mindful of signs like crossed arms, avoiding eye contact, slouching, fidgeting, or speaking softly, as these can signal insecurity or submission. Manipulators often use intimidating tactics like standing too close, intense eye contact, or authoritative gestures to assert dominance.

To stay in control, maintain a relaxed posture, direct eye contact, and use assertive gestures. These signals show you won’t be easily manipulated and can help manage such situations effectively.

Are you being pushed into a guilt trip? Don’t feel guilty if you are a victim of manipulation

Say NO to Guilt-Tripping guilt-tripping is when someone uses your emotional connection to manipulate you into doing something, even if you haven’t done anything wrong.

It can strain relationships by making you feel stressed or resentful for not meeting their demands.

To handle a manipulator who guilt-trips you, assert your boundaries firmly and express your feelings clearly. Request that they ask for what they want directly, without emotional manipulation. Make it clear that you have the right to say no and that any agreement will be genuine, not coerced. This approach helps maintain balance in the relationship and reduces the stress and anxiety caused by guilt trips.

Be Calm when you are facing manipulation

Being aggressive doesn’t help when dealing with a manipulator. Instead, staying calm is key. Manipulators aim to provoke emotional reactions to control you, using tactics like belittling or intimidation.

By staying emotionally detached and practising self-regulation, you can frustrate their attempts. Plan your responses calmly to avoid getting caught up in their game of control.

This approach helps you maintain clarity and control over the situation, reducing their influence and preserving your peace of mind. While it is not easy to handle manipulators, understanding their tactics and employing proactive strategies can empower you.

By setting clear boundaries, maintaining emotional composure, and fostering transparent communication, you can safeguard your well-being and assert your autonomy in relationships, thwarting manipulation effectively.