Category Archive : Relationship Counselor

Safeguard Children During Couple Arguments relationship advice

How To Safeguard Children During Couple Arguments?

We do not live in a perfect world, and no relationship is flawless. It is quite natural for all relationships to go through ups and downs. Conflicts and disagreements are bound to happen, even in the most loving families.

According to psychologists, the fact that parents fight is not the real issue—what truly matters is how they resolve those fights, with maturity and a balanced point of view. When parents manage their disagreements with calm, maturity, and mutual respect, some arguments can actually be constructive and can teach kids valuable lessons about communication and compromise.

Children are vulnerable. They are innocent. For them, parents are the primary source of safety and stability. So, when they see their parents yelling or arguing, they feel insecure and scared. This kind of toxic environment can leave an indelible mark on their young minds—sometimes with long-term psychological consequences.

How To Safeguard Children During Couple Arguments?

How can You Safeguard Your Children during Couple Arguments?

Shivani Misri Sadhoo, one of the top couples therapists in Delhi, shares a few tips and tricks on how to protect children when couples argue.

1. Don’t Raise Your Voice

Parenting is tough, no doubt, and an argument between a couple can’t always be avoided. However, how we handle these arguments matters most, especially in front of our children. When voices are raised, the impact on a child can be deeper than we imagine. They may not always show it, but they’re soaking in every word, every tone, and every reaction. A loud argument can leave them feeling unsafe or anxious, and over time, they may begin to mirror that behavior.

Kids don’t just hear us—they learn from us. If we shout when we’re upset, they may grow up thinking that’s how stress or disagreement is supposed to be handled. But if we can stay calm, even when things get heated, we’re teaching them strength, patience, and emotional stability. It’s not about being perfect parents—it’s about being conscious ones, especially when little ears and hearts are in the room.

2. Maintain Privacy

A good way to handle arguments between couples is to keep them behind closed doors. Children feel uncomfortable and emotionally unsafe when their parents fight in front of them, even unintentionally. They often have difficulty understanding the full context of disagreements, which can cause confusion, fear, or even a false sense of responsibility.

The privacy of the argument doesn’t make the argument harmless, but it shields the children from the emotional baggage of the argument. While kids can still sense tension in the air, watching it unfold directly is far more damaging. The separation of their children from conflict allows them to feel secure and emotionally stable while also allowing their parents to resolve issues without involving their children.

3. Keep Children Away From The Fights

Keeping kids out of a heated debate is one of the best things parents can do. Children should never be forced to mediate disputes between their parents or be pulled into adult disputes. Children who witness violent arguments, particularly if they feel compelled to choose a side, may become confused, emotionally conflicted, and even hold themselves accountable for the hostility at home.

No child should have to bear the burden of their parents’ problems or feel bad about something that is out of their control. They should be able to grow up without the emotional upheaval of adult arguments, in an environment where they feel safe, secure, and unconditionally loved by both parents.

4. Be Frank With Your Child

Make sure to have a heart-to-heart chat with your child, gently explaining that not all arguments are bad. Let them know that sometimes parents do fight, but that doesn’t mean something is wrong. In fact, some disagreements can lead to healthy conversations and help people understand each other better.

Reassure them that even when people argue, it doesn’t take away the love and care they have for one another. Tell them, “We still love you, and we still love each other.” It’s important to stay calm and help them see that just like they might have small fights with friends at school and then make up later, grown-ups do the same.

5. Seek Professional Guidance

Sometimes, it takes an outside perspective to truly understand what’s going wrong truly. If you’ve fought with your partner in front of your child, don’t be too hard on yourself—it happens. But if these arguments are becoming frequent or turning into shouting matches filled with insults, swearing, or slammed doors, it might be time to seek professional help.

No parent wants their child to carry the emotional weight of constant conflict at home. Counselling or therapy can offer a safe space to work through issues, using practical, proven methods to help couples communicate better and find healthier ways to handle disagreements.

Children deserve a safe, loving environment in which to grow. When parents stay calm, sort out issues in private, and keep little ones away from heated moments, they create a safer space for their children. Reassuring kids with love and honesty and seeking help when needed shows real strength. It’s okay to argue—just protect those tender hearts through it all.

Dating Profile That Can Lead to Marriage

Tips to Create Effective Dating Profile That Can Lead to Marriage

Finding love in today’s digital world can feel like a thrilling adventure or a daunting challenge. With just a swipe or a click, you can meet potential partners from across the globe. But how do you cut through the noise of endless profiles to find someone who genuinely aligns with your goals? While dating apps have made the process convenient, they’ve also introduced complexities that weren’t present in the era of handwritten love letters or classic movie nights of the 1980s.

How do you navigate this modern maze of romance? Can creating the right dating profile really be the key to finding someone special—and perhaps, even leading to marriage?

To answer these questions, Shivani Misri Sadhoo, India’s top couples therapist and relationship counsellor shares her expert tips to craft a dating profile that reflects your true self and attracts the right kind of partner for a meaningful, lasting relationship.

Shivani Misri Sadhoo, India’s top couples therapist and relationship counselor

1. Be Authentic when creating your dating profile

Perhaps the first and foremost thing to do when creating a dating profile is to be honest and authentic. Misrepresenting yourself or pretending to be flawless won’t help you find the right person. Be clear about what you want, whether it’s companionship or a lifelong partner, and embrace your imperfections with self-respect. Authenticity is magnetic and shows you value yourself and your journey. Being genuine helps attract someone who truly appreciates you for who you are.

2. Add Your Hobbies and Interests to Your Dating Profile

Always remember, that a successful dating profile should be fun, inviting, and full of personality. Use the 3 Cs— colour, context, and character—to tell your story and stand out. Highlight your hobbies, interests, and how you spend weekends. Focus on passions, like things you love doing, rather than problems.

Take advantage of the dating apps, to add details about work, family, and favourite activities. Keep it lighthearted and engaging to make online dating enjoyable for you and your matches.

3. Get To Know Your Potential Partner

Many times, while creating an attractive dating profile, we focus on showcasing ourselves but forget to express interest in knowing our potential partner. People value being known and supported, especially by romantic partners, where this understanding feels unique. Research shows that the most appealing profiles highlight a genuine desire to know and support a partner. The promise of being truly understood attracts others, as the need to feel known is a fundamental human desire.

4. Do Not Leave Any Gaps

Incomplete dating profiles are a big letdown. They show a lack of effort and interest, which can leave a poor first impression. First impressions matter, especially on dating apps, where your profile is the only way strangers get to know you.

Don’t approach it with a defeatist attitude, thinking it won’t work. A pessimistic outlook is never attractive and will only drive potential matches away. Take the time to complete your profile thoughtfully—it’s worth it.

5. Post Current Photo

Your face is a mirror to your mind, reflecting your true self. It’s important to be remembered for who you are today, not how you looked years ago in high school. Always post current photos when dating, as your partner wants to see the real you.

Outdated pictures often lead to mismatched expectations and disappointment. Include a mix of photos like headshots, full-body shots, and candid moments that reveal your hobbies and personality. Use clear, well-lit, high-resolution images. Avoid filters, as they can create a false impression. Show your true self with confidence.

6. Make Your Intentions Clear

There is no need to play hide and seek with your potential dating partner. Be upfront about your expectations from the start. If you’re unsure about what you want, it’s okay to admit it. Say that you’d like to explore compatibility and see where the relationship leads. If you’re someone who doesn’t enjoy mind games, make it clear what that means for you. Let them know you want a connection without unnecessary drama, chaos, or emotional baggage. Honesty sets the right foundation for any relationship.

In a nutshell, creating an effective dating profile requires authenticity, showcasing your hobbies and interests, and expressing a genuine desire to know your potential partner. Complete your profile thoughtfully, post current photos, and be clear about your intentions. By embracing these tips, you can craft a profile that reflects your true self and attracts a meaningful, lasting connection.

solve Intimacy Issues in a Marriage by Shivani misri Sadhoo

How to solve Intimacy Issues in a Relationship or Marriage?

Life isn’t always smooth, and relationships—whether romantic, familial, or friendships—come with their fair share of ups and downs. Suddenly something still feels off. Maybe the conversations have lost depth, intimacy feels more like an obligation or the emotional closeness you once cherished seems distant. If this resonates with you, it might be time to address intimacy issues before the gap grows wider.

If you’ve ever felt like you and your partner are merely coexisting rather than truly connecting, you’re not alone. Many relationships appear fine on the surface—there’s no major conflict, you function as a team, and others might even admire your bond.

But deep inside, there’s an unsettling emptiness, a sense that something crucial is missing. Often, this missing piece is intimacy—not just physical but emotional, too. Marriage and relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares a few tips and tricks to resolve these intimacy issues in a relationship or marriage.

How to solve Intimacy Issues in a Relationship or Marriage

How to solve intimacy issues in a relationship or marriage?

1. Find Out The Root Cause

The first step in resolving intimacy issues in a relationship is identifying the root cause. Intimacy isn’t limited to physical connection; emotional and intellectual intimacy are just as significant. Emotional intimacy involves sharing deep thoughts and feelings, while intellectual intimacy is about connecting through meaningful conversations and shared opinions.

Understanding which form of intimacy is lacking can help uncover underlying issues, such as past trauma, fear of vulnerability, or communication barriers, making it easier to address and resolve the problem.

2. Communicate Effectively

One of the best ways to resolve intimacy issues in a relationship or marriage is through effective communication. Open and honest conversations, where both partners express their feelings, concerns, and desires, create trust and understanding.

It’s vital to approach these talks with empathy, patience, and active listening, ensuring both partners feel heard and validated. By discussing what works and what needs improvement, couples can reconnect and work together to strengthen their emotional and physical bond.

3. ‘Shared Reality’ Helps

Sometimes, couples face challenges in emotional, physical, and intellectual intimacy due to a lack of understanding and alignment. This is where “shared reality” comes in—a concept that refers to both partners having a mutual understanding and agreement on their experiences, values, and needs. When a couple is “on the same page,” it allows them to address issues more effectively. For example, if one partner feels neglected emotionally, but the other isn’t aware, sharing their emotional realities helps bridge the gap, leading to a better connection.

In terms of physical intimacy, understanding each other’s boundaries and desires promotes a more comfortable and satisfying relationship. Similarly, shared reality in intellectual intimacy allows partners to engage in deeper conversations, respecting each other’s views, which strengthens their bond. This helps couples to navigate challenges better, leading to a more fulfilling and connected relationship.

4. Quality Time Matters

Amid the hustle of daily life, spending quality time together can significantly strengthen intimacy in a relationship. It’s about being emotionally present, giving each other undivided attention, and engaging in meaningful moments.

Whether it’s sharing a quiet evening or discussing dreams and challenges, these moments deepen the connection. Focus on each other. That’s how partners create a sense of being valued, heard, and understood, which strengthens their emotional bond.

5. Consult An Expert

If none of these tricks helps, seeking expert guidance can be a valuable step in resolving intimacy issues in a relationship or marriage. A therapist, counsellor, or mediator brings an unbiased perspective to the table, free from the emotional complexities that often cloud communication between partners.

They offer strategies to navigate tough conversations, helping both individuals express their feelings openly and understand each other’s viewpoints. Professional help is not a sign of failure, but rather a proactive approach to strengthening the relationship. Sometimes, having an expert facilitate discussions can lead to deeper understanding and renewed connection.

In A Nutshell

Every problem has a solution, and intimacy issues in relationships are no different. By understanding the root cause, communicating openly, creating a shared reality, spending quality time together, and seeking expert help when needed, couples can rebuild their emotional and physical connection, strengthening their bond for a fulfilling partnership.

What is Floodlighting Dating trend

What Does Floodlighting Mean in Dating Contexts? Warns Shivani Sadhoo

In an ever-evolving world of dating and relationships, new terms and concepts often emerge to describe different behaviours and experiences. One of those terms gaining attention is “floodlighting.” In dating contexts, floodlighting means the act of overwhelming your partner or potential romantic interest having intense emotions, personal confessions, or deep vulnerabilities pretty early in the relationship.

This could create a sense of emotional overload, leaving the other person feeling pressured or uncertain about the rapid progression of intimacy, discloses leading couples therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo.

What is Floodlighting?

Floodlighting is mostly driven by an urge for a deep connection, but it could inadvertently push people instead of bringing them closer. It usually happens when one person shares highly personal or emotionally heavy details about his/her life too soon in the relationship. This may include discussing past traumas, fears, insecurities, or deep intimate experiences before the base of trust has been established.

What Does Floodlighting Mean in Dating Contexts?

While openness and vulnerability are important in any healthy relationship, floodlighting happens when these aspects are introduced at an excessive pace. The receiver of the floodlighting might feel caught off guard, uncertain of how to respond, or even burdened with emotional responsibility that they are not currently prepared to handle.

What are the Signs of Floodlighting in Dating?

If you are puzzling about whether you or someone you are dating is engaging in floodlighting, here are some of the common signs:

  1. Excessive Sharing Too Soon – Talk about your deeply personal experiences, past traumas, or unsolved emotional wounds within the first few dates.
  2. Intense Emotional Expression – Displaying love, commitment, or deep feelings of attachment way too early in the relationship.
  3. Seeking Instant Emotional Validation – Expecting your partner to reciprocate the same level of emotional intensity straight away.
  4. Overwhelming Conversations – Making each conversation about deep, serious, or emotionally charged subjects rather than allowing natural progression.
  5. Forming Unbalanced Emotional Dynamics – Making the other partner feel responsible for emotional support prior to a strong bond being formed.

Why Do People Floodlight?

Floodlighting could stem from several psychological and emotional factors, that include:

  • Insecurity or Fear of Rejection – Certain individuals might floodlight in an effort to fast-track intimacy and look for reassurance.
  • Past Emotional Neglect – Those individuals who have felt unheard or unvalidated in earlier relationships might use floodlighting as a mechanism to seek immediate emotional connection.
  • Attachment Styles – A person with anxious attachment styles usually struggles with pacing emotional disclosure, leading towards floodlighting.
  • Romantic Idealization – A few believe that love must be instant and intense, making them rush emotional intimacy.

How to Avoid Floodlighting in Dating?

If you identify floodlighting tendencies in yourself or a partner, think of these strategies to form a healthier emotional connection:

  • Pace Your Emotional Sharing – Develop intimacy slowly and naturally rather than disclosing too much too soon.
  • Practice Self-Awareness – Identify when your emotions are driving your actions and take a step back if necessary.
  • Form Mutual Comfort Levels – Make sure both partners feel comfortable having the level of emotional depth being shared.
  • Concentrate on Enjoying the Moment – Rather than rushing to form deep connections, allow time for the relationship to form organically.

Floodlighting in dating is a conduct that stems from a genuine urge for closeness, but it could often backfire due to an overwhelming romantic interest. Healthy relationships need a balanced way to emotional sharing, letting both partners feel safe, secure, easy, and engaged without any undue pressure. By being aware of emotional pacing and forming natural connections, individuals could form stronger, more lasting relationships sans the unintended outcomes of floodlighting.

No Strings Attached explained Shivani Misri Sadhoo

No Strings Attached: What it Means in Relationships

We live in an era where relationships are no longer confined to traditional definitions. Love, commitment, and companionship have taken on various forms, often influenced by social media, dating apps, and evolving societal norms.

From situationships to ghosting, breadcrumbing to benching, modern relationship dynamics have become increasingly intricate. The once-clear distinction between casual and serious commitments has blurred, making many wonder: Are people afraid of long-term relationships? Can there be a relationship devoid of emotions?

If you’ve ever pondered whether such a connection is possible, psychologist and eminent relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo sheds light on the concept of no-strings-attached (NSA) relationships and what they truly entail. 

No Strings Attached: What it Means in Relationships

What does No Strings Attached mean?

A “no strings attached” (NSA) relationship is all about passion without the weight of commitment. Whether romantic, sexual, or business-related, it thrives on mutual consent, freedom, and zero expectations. Think of it as an endless honeymoon phase—carefree, fun, and pressure-free—where no one anticipates a fairytale ending, just the joy of the moment.

What is the Psychology behind No Strings Attached?

The psychological factors that probably contribute to NSA are:

  • Avoiding Emotional Vulnerability: Setting clear boundaries helps individuals protect themselves from potential hurt or disappointment if feelings develop.
  • Freedom and Exploration: Allows both partners to experiment with different sexual dynamics and desires without the pressure of commitment.
  • Emotional Independence: Ideal for those prioritizing personal growth or busy lifestyles, as it offers emotional freedom without the responsibilities of a committed relationship.
  • Managing Expectations: Clearly defining the relationship as “no strings attached” minimizes misunderstandings about commitment levels.
  • Individualistic Focus: Encourages prioritizing personal needs and desires over a partner’s, emphasizing personal agency and freedom.
  • Exploration and Sexual Satisfaction: Provides a safe space to explore physical desires, experiment with preferences, and boosts sexual confidence.
No Strings Attached: What it Means in Relationships

What do You Gain in No Strings Attached?

1. No Need To Commit – If you are someone who isn’t ready to settle down, an NSA relationship can be ideal. With no pressure to commit, it offers convenience, freedom, and enjoyment without relationship-based responsibilities. There’s no exclusivity unless agreed upon, allowing individuals to engage with multiple partners. It’s a carefree way to explore connections without long-term obligations or vows.

2. Time is not a Constraint – In today’s fast-paced world, time is a luxury. An NSA (No Strings Attached) relationship offers the advantage of flexibility, allowing individuals to connect without the pressure of strict schedules or long-term commitments. Unlike traditional relationships, NSA interactions fit seamlessly into busy lifestyles, ensuring enjoyment without overwhelming obligations. With no need to coordinate availability, partners can focus on shared moments without sacrificing personal or professional priorities.

3. Self-Exploration – It helps you explore different relationship dynamics without commitment, giving insight into what you truly value in a partner. By experiencing various interactions, you become aware of traits you appreciate and those you cannot tolerate. This freedom boosts confidence, enhances communication, and allows self-discovery. A no-strings-attached arrangement helps you assess what works for you, ensuring you make informed choices when seeking a meaningful future relationship.

What Do We Lose?

1. Emotional Turmoil – The biggest drawback of an NSA relationship is the risk of emotional pain. When feelings get involved, someone often ends up hurt, feeling used or unvalued. If one partner develops deeper emotions while the other doesn’t, it leads to heartbreak. Though NSA relationships start with no expectations, they can still result in conflict and painful endings, making emotional detachment difficult in the long run.

2. Low Self-esteem – A “No Strings Attached” (NSA) relationship can negatively impact self-confidence by causing emotional detachment and feelings of being “used.” The lack of commitment may lead to anxiety, rejection fears, and self-doubt, especially if one person develops deeper feelings. Studies link casual sex to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. While NSA can boost confidence temporarily, it often undermines self-worth in the long run.

3. Negative Impact on Mental and Physical Health -Casual relationships might seem risk-free, but they come with hidden health risks. Without commitment or accountability, the chances of STIs increase due to a lack of exclusivity. Another overlooked aspect is sexual aftercare—emotional and physical support after intimacy. In committed relationships, partners naturally care for each other’s well-being, but in casual encounters, this essential care is often missing, affecting both physical and emotional health.

In a nutshell, NSA relationships offer freedom, excitement, and self-exploration without the weight of commitment. However, they come with emotional risks, potential self-esteem issues, and health concerns. While they suit some, they may not be for everyone. Understanding personal boundaries and expectations is key to making informed choices in modern relationship dynamics.

Heal after an Indian divorce

Life After Divorce – How to Heal and Start Rebuilding

Divorce can be one of the most challenging experiences in life, bringing emotional turmoil, uncertainty, and a need for reinvention. Whether the separation was amicable or contentious, the transition can feel overwhelming. However, life after divorce is not just about coping—it is about healing and rebuilding a fulfilling future.

life after divorce adjustment tips

How do you heal and start rebuilding after a divorce?

Here’s how you can embark on this journey as shared by couples therapist and marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo.

Allow Yourself to Grieve

Divorce represents the end of a significant chapter in your life. It is natural to experience a mix of emotions, including sadness, anger, guilt, and even relief. Suppressing these feelings can prolong the healing process. Allow yourself to grieve and process your emotions. Seeking professional counseling or joining support groups can help you navigate this emotional phase more effectively.

Rediscover Yourself

Marriage often involves compromise, sometimes at the expense of personal aspirations and interests. Post-divorce life is an opportunity to reconnect with yourself. Engage in activities that bring you joy—whether it’s travelling, painting, fitness, or learning a new skill. Embracing your individuality will help you regain confidence and create a fresh identity.

Establish a Support System

Surround yourself with positive influences—family, friends, and support groups who uplift and encourage you. Avoid isolating yourself, as loneliness can intensify feelings of despair. Talking about your experiences and emotions with trusted people can provide comfort and perspective.

Take Charge of Your Finances

Divorce often comes with financial adjustments. If you are dependent on your spouse financially, take proactive steps to gain financial independence. Create a budget, manage expenses wisely, and consider consulting a financial advisor to plan for future stability. Understanding your finances will empower you to make informed decisions about your future.

Prioritize Self-Care

Your well-being should be your top priority. Focus on both physical and mental health. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate sleep can significantly improve your mood and energy levels. Meditation, yoga, or therapy can help manage stress and foster emotional resilience.

Set New Goals

A new chapter in life means new opportunities. Set realistic and meaningful goals—whether personal, professional, or relational. It could be advancing your career, starting a business, or forming new social connections. Having goals provides direction and a sense of purpose.

Embrace New Relationships Cautiously

Jumping into a new relationship immediately after divorce may not be the best decision. Take time to heal and understand what you truly want in a partner. When you are emotionally ready, approach dating with an open yet cautious mindset. Prioritize personal growth before committing to someone new.

Seek Professional Help if Needed

If you find yourself struggling to move on, seeking therapy or professional counseling can be beneficial. A trained therapist can provide guidance, coping strategies, and a safe space to work through unresolved emotions.

Life after divorce can be daunting, but it is also an opportunity for growth and renewal. Healing takes time, but with self-care, support, and a positive outlook, you can rebuild a life that is fulfilling and meaningful. Embrace this new beginning with hope and confidence—your best days are yet to come.

best online marriage couselling in India

How can you Break Free from the Chains of Past Mistakes?

Life is a journey, and every journey is bound to encounter detours, bumps, and wrong turns. Our past mistakes often feel like heavy chains, weighing us down, and holding us back from moving forward. But what if you could break free from these chains and start anew?

ways to break free from the chains of past mistakes

What are some of the ways to break free from the chains of past mistakes?

Let Shivani Misri Sadhoo, India’s leading relationship expert and couples counsellor be your guide in this transformative process as she explains the process.

Acknowledge and Accept

The first step to breaking free is acknowledging your mistakes. Denial only prolongs the pain and leaves you stuck in a loop of regret. Take a moment to reflect on your past actions. Ask yourself: What went wrong? What could I have done differently? Self-awareness is key, but it must be paired with self-acceptance. Remember, mistakes are part of being human—they shape who we are and help us grow.

Forgive Yourself

Forgiveness is a powerful tool for liberation. Often, we hold ourselves hostage to guilt, replaying our errors like a broken record. To move forward, you need to forgive yourself. Self-compassion is not about excusing your actions but about understanding that you are a work in progress. Write a letter to yourself, acknowledging the mistake, expressing regret, and affirming your commitment to learn and improve.

Learn the Lesson

Every mistake carries a lesson waiting to be learned. Instead of dwelling on the error, focus on what it has taught you. Perhaps it revealed a blind spot in your behaviour, highlighted a toxic pattern or showed you the value of patience. Mistakes are life’s greatest teachers. Extract the wisdom they offer, and use it as fuel to propel yourself forward.

Let Go of the Past

Letting go is easier said than done, but it is essential for healing. Holding onto the past is like dragging an anchor—your future cannot thrive while you’re rooted in regret. Engage in practices like mindfulness or meditation to focus on the present. Visualize yourself cutting the chains of your past mistakes and walking into a brighter future.

Take Action Toward Growth

Breaking free from past mistakes isn’t just about reflection; it’s about taking proactive steps to grow. If your mistake hurt someone, apologize and make amends. If it was a professional error, seek opportunities to upskill. Forward motion is key. Start small, set achievable goals, and celebrate your progress.

Surround Yourself with Support

No one breaks free alone. Seek guidance from a trusted friend, family member, or mentor who can guide you toward self-discovery. Sharing your journey with others can lighten the load and provide new perspectives.

The Power of Renewal

Mistakes do not define you; how you respond to them does. Life’s greatest transformations often emerge from its darkest moments. By acknowledging, forgiving, and learning, you can break free from the chains of your past and step into a future filled with possibility.

Your past is just a chapter—not the whole story. Embrace the journey of growth and allow yourself the freedom to begin again.

relationship counselor in delhi_shivani misri sadhoo

5 Important Things a Long Distance Relationship Teaches You

Falling in love often feels effortless, filled with shared moments and joy. But when distance becomes part of the equation, nurturing that love demands patience, trust, and unwavering commitment. Long-distance relationships are undoubtedly challenging, trading spontaneous coffee dates and evening strolls for late-night calls and virtual hugs. Yet, they offer invaluable lessons about love, commitment, and ourselves.

What are the important things a long-distance relationship teaches you?

Let’s explore five key lessons a long-distance relationship teaches, as shared by India’s renowned marriage and relationship counselor, Shivani Misri Sadhoo.

Time Is Valuable

A long-distance relationship reveals the fleeting nature of time and teaches us to cherish moments with our loved ones. While physical separation limits shared activities, it emphasizes emotional investment, open sharing, and attentive listening. In today’s digital age, where connections often feel superficial, long-distance relationships foster meaningful bonds through intentional conversations and deep understanding. Moments of connection—whether a heartfelt conversation or a virtual meal—become precious reminders to value the time spent with those we love.

relationship counselor in dia_shivani sadhoo

The Art of Patience

Living apart requires an exceptional level of patience. Unlike proximity-based relationships, where instant gratification is common, long-distance relationships teach us to wait. There are times when your partner may not answer a call—not out of neglect but due to circumstances like work or travel. These moments test your ability to trust and manage misunderstandings. The prolonged wait for visits or responses often feels unbearable, but it fosters endurance, hope, and resilience. This learned patience not only strengthens your bond but also cultivates a broader life skill: appreciating delayed gratification and embracing the joy of reunions.

The Importance of Communication

Communication forms the backbone of any relationship, but its importance is magnified in long-distance setups. Being apart compels couples to practice clarity, honesty, and regular interaction. Miscommunication or withholding feelings can lead to unnecessary complications, making transparency essential. Effective communication strengthens emotional bonds, resolves conflicts, and builds trust, minimizing negative feelings. Sharing experiences, beliefs, and expectations bridges the physical gap, ensuring that emotional intimacy flourishes despite the miles.

Trust Becomes Essential

Trust is vital in any relationship, but in a long-distance dynamic, it takes center stage. Physical separation can breed uncertainty, yet this distance pushes couples to rely on trust more than ever. Gestures of love, honest communication, and patience become the foundation of emotional security. Trusting in your partner’s actions, promises, and intentions helps navigate the challenges of being apart. Setting boundaries and clear expectations further strengthens this trust, creating a secure and respectful space. Long-distance relationships demonstrate that trust transcends proximity—it’s about emotional assurance and belief in the relationship’s strength.

You Learn to Appreciate Each Other

Distance has a way of amplifying appreciation for your partner. When physically close, it’s easy to overlook gestures or become frustrated by quirks. However, separation sharpens your focus on the qualities and actions that make your partner special. The absence of their touch, voice, or presence makes their value unmistakably clear. Things once taken for granted, like a simple conversation or a laugh, gain profound significance. This newfound perspective fosters deeper gratitude and highlights the importance of the little things in a relationship.

Long-distance relationships are undeniably challenging, but they bring invaluable rewards. They teach us to treasure time, master patience, communicate effectively, build trust, and deeply appreciate our partners. Despite the obstacles, these relationships strengthen emotional connections and encourage us to value every shared moment, proving that love can thrive even across great distances.

couples therapist in gurgaon_shivani misri sadhoo

Things You Can Do When Your Partner Doesn’t Have Time for You

We live in an era where time seems to slip through our fingers like sand. There’s always another errand to run, another deadline to meet, and another responsibility to juggle. Amidst this whirlwind of activity, our relationships often take a backseat.

We tend to overlook or take for granted the special moments that nurture and sustain our bonds.

Whether it’s taking a leisurely walk in the park, sharing a quiet cup of morning coffee, or watching the star-studded sky by the sea, these seemingly small moments are the building blocks of true connection and intimacy.

couples therapist in delhi_shivani misri sadhoo

What happens when your partner doesn’t have time for these precious moments and how to rectify the situation?

Here are 7 simple yet meaningful ways to bridge the gap and keep the connection alive shared by one of Delhi’s leading couples therapistsShivani Misri Sadhoo.

Greet Each Other

Sometimes, little things go unnoticed in relationships, yet they hold profound importance. Greeting and parting gestures, like warmly saying hello or goodbye to your partner, are among these subtle yet impactful acts.

They signify attentiveness, respect, and care, showing your partner they are valued and cherished in your life. By consistently acknowledging their presence and showing interest in their day, these simple gestures strengthen emotional bonds and foster a foundation of mutual respect and security in a relationship.

Talk to Each Other

Talk to each other. Setting aside dedicated time to connect with your partner and genuinely inquire about their day demonstrates a profound interest in their life.

By actively listening and remembering details they share, such as their projects or challenges, you show that their experiences matter deeply to you. This open communication nurtures intimacy and fortifies the foundation of trust and understanding in your relationship.

Equally important is expressing your own feelings and needs openly, using “I” statements to avoid blame and promote mutual empathy. This approach cultivates a supportive environment where both partners feel valued and heard, nurturing a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

Listen To Each Other

Communication is a two-way process. It involves more than just speaking; it’s about truly listening and understanding each other. When partners actively listen without deflection or defensiveness, they create a safe space for vulnerability and shared feelings.

Feeling heard builds trust and respect, showing that each person’s thoughts and emotions matter. While hearing is passive, listening is active and requires genuine attention to grasp the speaker’s perspective fully. In essence, effective listening strengthens connections by validating each other’s experiences and nurturing deeper understanding in the relationship.

Common Interests

When two people share or have similar interests, it can significantly ease the challenges when one partner lacks time for the other. Rather than viewing chores and responsibilities as barriers, tackling them together becomes opportunity for bonding.

Whether it’s grocery shopping, exploring new hobbies, or cleaning the house as a team, these shared moments foster deeper connection and joy. Even if partners are opposites, finding common ground and meeting halfway ensures a balanced and fulfilling relationship.

Be Supportive

Sometimes all it takes is to understand each other’s commitments when your partner doesn’t have enough time for you. By being mindful of their needs and demonstrating how they can make you feel loved and cherished through small gestures, you foster cooperation.

Making requests instead of demands shows flexibility and supports their responsibilities. Acknowledge their time constraints, offer encouragement, and reassure them of your unwavering support, building a strong foundation of understanding in your relationship.

Say NO to Technology For Some Time

You will find that setting limits on technology can greatly enhance quality time with your partner. Designate tech-free zones like the dinner table, and establish regular “techno-curfews” for uninterrupted moments together.

By resisting the urge to check devices during conversations or breaks, you demonstrate genuine focus and respect. This small gesture prioritizes your partner over distractions, strengthening your connection even in everyday moments.

Sweet Surprises

Sometimes, sweet surprises can win your partner’s heart and attention, especially when they don’t have much time. Plan creative, personalized activities based on their interests, like a romantic getaway or a concert. The anticipation and shared joy strengthen your bond.

Capture these moments with photos and stories, creating lasting memories. Surprise your partner to keep the relationship exciting and meaningful.

These tips emphasize the importance of small, meaningful actions in nurturing relationships. By greeting, communicating, listening, sharing interests, supporting each other, limiting technology, and planning sweet surprises, couples can maintain intimacy and connection even during busy times.

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What to do if You are Married, but Attracted to Someone Else?

Did you know that it is perfectly normal to have feelings for another person even while you are married? These brief infatuations with another person are part of human nature, rooted in our brain chemistry. However, these feelings do not reflect anything about your marriage, your spouse, or the person you’re having a crush on.

While such feelings can add thrill and excitement to your life, they might also bring feelings of guilt and fear. Do not worry. Here are certain things that are being explained in this blog.

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What do you need to do when you are married, yet are attracted to someone else?

Eminent couples therapist and marriage counsellor in Delhi, Shivani Misri Sadhoo is here to tell you what you can do when you are married but have a crush on someone else.

Accept your Feelings – Perhaps the first and foremost step in getting over your crush while married is to acknowledge and accept your feelings. Recognizing that crushes are a natural part of the human experience and do not signify a lack of love for your spouse or a failing marriage is crucial.

By admitting your feelings to yourself, you can take active measures to manage them, preventing them from leading to a potential affair. This self-awareness empowers you to gain control over your emotions, rather than allowing them to dictate your actions, ultimately helping you to move past the crush.

Reflect and Reconnect – When you’re married and having a crush on someone else, reflecting on your marriage is crucial. It helps you understand the potential consequences of acting on those feelings. Assessing what you stand to lose reminds you of the value of your relationship and the life you’ve built together.

Additionally, it prompts you to consider if the person you’re attracted to is truly worth jeopardizing your marriage. Furthermore, reflection may uncover underlying issues within your relationship that need attention. This introspection can lead to open communication with your spouse, strengthening your bond and addressing any areas for improvement.

Stay Away from Your Crush – Any kind of temptation is hard to resist, especially when it involves someone outside of your marriage. When you have a crush on someone, the best course of action is to create distance. While complete avoidance may be impossible, limiting contact is crucial. Setting clear boundaries and sticking to them prevents the crush from escalating.

Reducing interactions gradually diminishes the intensity of feelings over time, safeguarding the sanctity of your marriage. By prioritizing distance, you prioritize your commitment to your spouse and ensure the crush doesn’t jeopardize your relationship.

Set Clear Boundaries – Familiarity can intensify feelings and blur boundaries, potentially jeopardizing a marriage. It’s important to establish clear boundaries in such cases. By maintaining distance and limiting interactions with the crush, you prevent the escalation of emotions. Sending mixed signals only fuels confusion and potential misunderstandings, complicating matters further.

The sooner you recognize that managing a crush is solely your responsibility, the better it will be for you to avoid such behaviours that could harm your relationship. Communicating openly with your partner about boundaries reinforces trust and commitment. Remember, prioritizing your marriage means actively safeguarding against the allure of a crush and steering clear of actions that may compromise the relationship’s integrity.

Honest Communication – We all know that communication is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. When you have a crush on someone else while you are married, it is quite natural to feel guilty or embarrassed about these feelings, but keeping them secret only intensifies the struggle. By openly discussing your emotions with your spouse, you’re acknowledging their importance and seeking understanding.

This transparency not only strengthens trust but also cultivates a deeper connection. While the conversation may feel awkward, it’s an opportunity to strengthen the bond between you and your partner. By confiding in them, you’re not only sharing your struggles but also inviting their support and perspective. This honesty can breathe new life into your relationship, allowing both of you to overcome challenges together. Ultimately, open communication lays the foundation for surmounting obstacles and reaffirming your commitment to each other.

It is evident from this article that it would be wise to acknowledge and accept your feelings, reflect on your marriage, maintain distance from your crush, set clear boundaries, and communicate openly with your spouse. These steps strengthen bonds and safeguard relationships.