Marriage isn’t the be-all and end-all for everyone. In a world where individualism is celebrated, many people opt to remain single, prioritizing personal fulfillment over traditional notions of partnership. For some, focusing on career advancement, personal growth, or pursuing passions takes precedence over romantic entanglements. The notion that looks are the primary deciding factor when it comes to choosing a partner is completely outdated. Did you know that there are many smart and attractive women who are still single?

What are the reasons that smart and attractive women are still single?

Wonder why? Let’s find out the reasons from India’s top relationship and couples counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo.

They love their independence

Smart and attractive women often find themselves single not because they can’t find a partner, but because they value their independence fiercely. They’re not sitting around waiting for Prince Charming to ride in on a white horse because they’re too busy building their own kingdoms.

These women know they can handle anything life throws at them—they don’t need a man to rescue them from a spider or fix a leaky faucet. They’re the CEOs of their own lives, making decisions based on what’s best for them, not what society says they should do. They understand that true happiness stems from within, not from a relationship status.

It is their choice; not a compulsion

Sometimes bold and beautiful women simply want to stay single. It is their choice. There may not be any reason for this. They love their own company. Marriage is a choice for them; not a compulsion or necessity.

They have high expectations from the groom

It is true that smart and attractive women often possess high standards when it comes to relationships. They are acutely aware of their worth and what they can contribute to a partnership. While they acknowledge that perfection is unattainable, they maintain a non-negotiable list of expectations. These women seek a relationship characterized by mutual respect and emotional fulfillment, refusing to settle for anything less. Consequently, their discerning standards may lead them to remain single as they patiently await a connection that aligns with their values and aspirations.

They feel vulnerable

Despite their outward confidence, many smart and attractive women harbor a fear of vulnerability. Past heartbreaks or betrayals intensify this fear, leading to emotional distance in relationships. They struggle to open up, fearing rejection or disappointment despite their intelligence and attractiveness.

They’re too busy

Smart, attractive women often stay single because they prioritize their professional success. They’re fully invested in self-improvement and don’t always make time for dating apps. Their focus is on bettering themselves through career advancement and personal growth. They believe true love will come naturally when the timing is right, choosing not to waste time on distractions they can’t control.

They don’t want to lose their authority

Many smart, strong, and stunning women choose to remain single because they value their independence and autonomy above all else. They’ve always been the ones to take the reins, make decisions, and chart their own course without being swayed by others. The thought of relinquishing control to someone else in marriage feels daunting; they fear losing their authority and sense of self. These women aren’t afraid to be labeled as “control freaks” because they know what they want and won’t settle for anything less than full autonomy over their lives.

Men feel intimidated

Many men feel intimidated by her strong personality and find her unapproachable, so she remains single. She’s amazing, smart, and attractive, which can be intimidating for guys. They think they’re not good enough for her. She doesn’t settle for just any relationship; it has to be worthwhile. She values her time and energy and won’t waste it on something that doesn’t feel right. She knows there’s more to her than just her relationship status. She understands the difference between forcing a bad relationship and giving a good one a chance.

These are just a few reasons why smart, attractive women may choose to remain single. Whether it’s prioritizing independence, career, or personal growth, their decision reflects a deep understanding of self-worth and a refusal to settle.

Dating an independent woman can be an enriching experience, but it also comes with its own set of nuances. So, what exactly do independent women want from men in relationships?

First and foremost, it’s essential to understand who an independent woman is. She’s not just someone who pays her bills or pursues her career goals. An independent woman knows herself deeply, speaks her mind with clarity, and lives authentically according to her values. She doesn’t seek validation or fulfilment from others; instead, she finds it within herself.

What are the things independent women want from men?

Let us learn from leading marriage and relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

Respect

Independent women seek partners who not only recognize but celebrate their autonomy. A secure man values her self-reliance, encouraging her aspirations and respecting her need for space. He engages in constructive dialogue, cherishes her uniqueness, and supports her goals.

Moreover, he values her physical boundaries and emotional well-being, recognizing that true allure lies in his ability to comprehend and connect with her as an individual while acknowledging the unity within their shared journey.

Equality in relationships

An independent woman looks for a partner who is her equal, not her competitor. She believes in sharing responsibilities, making decisions together, and working as a team to build a life. This means both partners pitch in and share the load, creating a balanced and satisfying dynamic.

Equality isn’t just about the basics; it’s about fairness, talking openly, and understanding each other. It’s about seeing and respecting each other’s differences and treating each other’s opinions and contributions with value, regardless of what society says.

Honest communication

Good communication is vital for a healthy relationship. Independent women appreciate partners who are upfront and willing to have deep conversations. She values openness and honesty, so it’s important to be direct and assertive like her.

Don’t shy away from expressing your thoughts and feelings. She wants her partner to be transparent and vulnerable too, as this builds intimacy and strengthens the relationship. So, keep the dialogue open and honest for a deeper connection that grows stronger over time.

Emotional connection

Sometimes, grasping the unspoken nuances becomes crucial. An empowered and self-reliant woman places great value on emotional availability in a relationship. Recognizing the significance of emotional intimacy, she seeks a connection that goes beyond shared interests and physical attraction. Fearless in embracing vulnerability, she desires a partner who shares this openness.

For her, a relationship is a comprehensive bond that involves mutual support and understanding. Even the most self-sufficient woman may, at times, yearn to be vulnerable, allowing her partner to be the pillar of strength.

They want their partners to follow their own dreams too

Independent women seek partners who are strong and self-sufficient. They are drawn to individuals who can handle their own lives without constant support. These women value ambition and expect their partners to have their own aspirations.

Being with someone who is driven not only adds excitement to the relationship but also fosters personal growth and independence. Such partnerships propel both parties toward their dreams and create a supportive environment for mutual success.

Looks for unconditional love

An independent woman values her needs in a relationship. Despite her strength, she desires love, care, and consideration. Like anyone, she seeks a partner who embraces her flaws, celebrates her uniqueness, and stands by her through life’s challenges. Recognize her feelings, be there for her, and show unconditional love for a flourishing relationship.

Now that we’ve explored what independent women expect from their partners—respect, equality, honest communication, emotional connection, and shared dreams—it’s evident that they seek relationships built on mutual understanding and support. These expectations foster strong bonds where both individuals thrive personally and collectively, embracing each other’s autonomy and aspirations.

 “Love is often romanticized as a beautiful feeling, the heartwarming cornerstone of countless stories, songs, and dreams. Yet, as we step into the complex terrain of the real world, we quickly realize that love isn’t always a fairy tale set to a catchy tune.

Sometimes, it becomes a painful and bewildering journey, particularly when you begin to suspect that the woman you hold dear is merely pretending to love you. In this article, Shivani Sadhoo delves into the intricacies of such situations, shedding light on the tell-tale signs that can serve as ominous markers, indicating that her professed love for you may not be as genuine as you had hoped.

When a woman only pretends to love someone?

Some of the signs according to the marriage and relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo that indicate a woman is merely pretending to love you are:

• Lack of Respect

When a woman consistently demonstrates a lack of respect towards you, it can be a clear indication that her professed love may be insincere. Respect is a fundamental element of a healthy relationship. If she disregards your feelings, boundaries, or opinions, it’s crucial to consider whether her love is genuine or merely a facade.

• She Doesn’t Care About Your Feelings

A clear indicator of her lack of genuine love is her disregard for your emotions and well-being. She prioritizes her convenience, showing no concern for your feelings, needs, or aspirations. Her apparent affection is merely a façade to gain something from the relationship. When you’re down or upset, she feigns care when it’s effortless, but avoids offering real support when it requires her genuine attention and empathy.

• When She Deceives You

A person who truly loves you wouldn’t betray your trust with someone else. When someone is deeply in love, suspicion of infidelity and the need for evidence shouldn’t exist. Cheating and genuine love are incompatible.

Even if you forgive her and she claims to love you more, if she avoids difficult conversations and doesn’t want to face her betrayal, she’s prioritizing her comfort over your emotions. This isn’t the behaviour of someone who genuinely loves you.

• She Treats You Differently in Public

When you’re alone, she embodies everything you’ve ever desired in a partner. However, a stark contrast emerges when you’re in the company of others. In such situations, she becomes openly critical, disparaging, and dismissive of you. Her demeanour is far from pleasant, and despite attempts to rationalize it, the hurt remains.

• Avoids Commitment

Avoiding commitment can be a major red flag. If she’s reluctant to commit to a serious relationship, avoids discussing the future, or dodges talks of moving in together or getting married, she may not be as invested in the relationship as you are.

• You Are Not Important to Her

One common sign that a woman might be pretending to love you is if she doesn’t prioritize spending time with you. When you’re not a significant focus in her life, it suggests a lack of genuine care. If she doesn’t actively seek out quality time with you and readily chooses other activities over being with you, it may indicate a problem in her attraction or love for you. True love often involves a strong desire to spend quality time together, so her lack of effort could be a red flag for the authenticity of her feelings.

• Lack Of Intimacy

Physical touch plays a vital role in expressing emotions, intimacy, and affection within a relationship. When a person consistently avoids physical contact and emotional intimacy, it may be indicative of insincerity and a lack of love. A deep, loving connection typically involves both emotional and physical closeness, making these signs of avoidance concerning the authenticity of the relationship.

In love, actions often speak louder than words. When a woman consistently displays disrespect, indifference to her feelings, deception, and varying behaviour in public, it raises questions about the authenticity of her love.

Avoidance of commitment, lack of prioritization, and absence of intimacy further compound doubts. In genuine love, respect, care, trust, and consistency are the cornerstones. When these elements are absent, it’s essential to re-evaluate the sincerity of the relationship. 

One of the oldest and biggest mantras to a healthy and lasting relationship is trust. It is a fragile yet powerful adhesive that holds two people together. It certainly is hard and at times a complex task to develop trust when you are beginning out in a relationship. But it is not so much of an arduous challenge once both the entities in a relationship are in it together says Shivani Sadhoo.

Here India’s eminent relationship counselor and couple’s therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares some effective tips that will assist you to form trust, feel loved, respected, secure, and content in your relationship.

·       Understand the causes why you two are together and make certain the reasons are right. Develop a framework around your relationship first.

·       If you love somebody, you have to respect them. The more respect you form between the two of you, the greater the love is. Define things that makes you feel disrespected and agree not to use that as a ploy in your relationship.

·       Do not expect the sort of romance that is shown in movies. Have realistic expectations related to your relationship and romance. You need to know that true romance is an outcome of respect, trust, and freedom of expression.

·       Always express what you feel like. If you are too worried or scared to speak out, it will simply make it difficult for you in the future. Make certain you let it all out of your system for the benefit of your relationship.

·       Providing each other space is equally vital as spending quality time with each other. Both of you must enjoy a space where you do things individually that makes you happy.

·       Changes are inevitable. You fall in love with a person’s mind and the person you fell in love with is bound to change with time. You need to expect and accept it. It is basic human nature to change, so do not let it get in your way.

Your Therapist Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control the pandemic’s spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of pandemic, we hope to offer our therapeutic help. Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high.

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option. Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service!

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.