Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

Eminent Couples Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares Signs that Your Partner is a Sensitive Woman

Emotional sensitivity is a trait that could greatly enhance the depth and richness of relationships. Sensitive women tend to be compassionate, empathetic, and attuned to the emotions of those around them. If you’re in a relationship with a sensitive woman, you’re likely experiencing a unique and rewarding connection. In this article, eminent marriage counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares ten signs that indicate you’re with a sensitive woman.

What are signs that your Partner is a sensitive Woman?

According to Shivani, there are many major or subtle signs, but here she is talking exclusively about the 10 signs that you need to check for. They are:

She is Empathetic

A sensitive woman has a strong capacity for empathy. She can deeply understand and share the feelings of others, making her an excellent listener and a supportive partner. She genuinely cares about your emotional well-being and will be there for you in times of need.

She Notices the Little Things

Sensitive women have a knack for noticing subtle details and nuances that others might overlook. Whether it’s a change in your tone of voice or a small gesture, she is attentive to your needs and emotions.

She Values Open Communication

Communication is vital in any relationship, and a sensitive woman understands this well. She encourages open and honest conversations, making it easier for both of you to express your thoughts, feelings, and concerns without judgment.

She is Considerate of Your Feelings

Sensitive women are considerate and thoughtful partners. They take your feelings into account when making decisions and are careful not to hurt or offend you. They strive to create a safe and nurturing environment for the relationship to flourish.

She Expresses Her Emotions Freely

While some may view emotional expression as a weakness, sensitive women embrace their feelings and express them openly. They are in touch with their emotions and encourage you to do the same, creating a space where vulnerability is celebrated.

She Values Connection

Sensitive women often prioritize emotional connection in their relationships. They seek to build deep and meaningful bonds with their partners, making them loyal and devoted companions.

She is Supportive

Whether you’re pursuing your dreams or facing challenges, a sensitive woman will stand by your side. She provides unwavering support and encouragement, helping you achieve your goals and navigate life’s ups and downs.

She is Creative and Artistic

Many sensitive women have a creative and artistic side. They may enjoy pursuits like writing, painting, music, or other forms of self-expression. This creativity often enriches the relationship with depth and passion.

She is Attuned to Nonverbal Cues

Sensitive women are skilled at reading nonverbal cues, such as body language and facial expressions. This ability allows them to understand your emotions even when you may not be verbally expressing them.

She Values Harmony and Peace

Sensitive women often seek harmony and peace in their relationships. They are willing to compromise and work through conflicts in a constructive and empathetic manner, making the relationship more resilient and fulfilling.

Being in a relationship with a sensitive woman can be a rewarding experience. Her empathy, emotional depth, and attentiveness can enhance the connection you share and bring a sense of harmony and support to your partnership.

By recognizing these signs, you can better appreciate and nurture the unique qualities that a sensitive woman brings to your life, ultimately leading to a stronger and more fulfilling relationship.

Not every relationship is destined to be a perfect match. People are unique, with diverse needs and personalities. While some couples effortlessly complement each other, others may face challenges. However, one of the most beautiful and exhilarating aspects of a romantic relationship is the presence of genuine chemistry between partners. While it may not be the sole determinant of a successful relationship, recognizing serious chemistry is essential for building a strong and lasting connection.

Relationship chemistry is not akin to a scientific formula but a unique blend of emotions, connection, and compatibility that can’t be easily quantified, making each connection special and unpredictable.

What are those clear signs that suggest there is serious chemistry between two individuals?

India’s leading marriage counsellor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares a few signs to find out the genuine chemistry between couples:

1. Magnetic Attraction

Instant fascination is a powerful indicator of strong chemistry between partners. While appearance may be the initial attraction, it goes beyond mere looks. It’s the magnetic pull, the unspoken connection, and the exchange of infatuating glances that reveal a deeper, irresistible bond, making it clear that chemistry plays a pivotal role in relationships.

2. Eyes can talk

Eye contact is like a secret language between two people in love. When you’re into someone, your eyes can’t help but lock onto theirs. It’s like a magnetic pull that screams, “I’m into you!” You hold that gaze longer, steal glances, and there’s this electric intensity that says, “We’ve got some serious chemistry going on here!” It’s a wordless confirmation of the sparks flying between you two.

3. Body Language

Body language reveals chemistry between couples through subtle cues like mirroring each other’s movements, leaning in closer, touching, and blushing. Women may fidget with their hair or lips, while men might get sweaty palms. These nonverbal signals indicate a strong connection and attraction, regardless of gender.

4. Similar Interests

Partners with strong chemistry often discover that they share common interests and values. Whether it’s a love for hiking, a passion for art, or a commitment to similar ethical principles, shared aspects of life can significantly enhance your connection.

5. No need for words

When two people share a strong bond, they can read each other’s thoughts and emotions without uttering a word. This unspoken bond brings them closer, forging a unique intimacy that words simply can’t capture.

6. No Compulsion

When you genuinely enjoy each other’s company without feeling the need to constantly entertain or impress one another, it’s a clear sign that you two are ‘made for each other’. Being comfortable in silence or simply being together speaks volumes about your connection. You will feel relaxed and energized at the same time. You can be yourself without fear of judgment. The relationship will feel effortless and safe.

7. It’s Only Us

One of the most awe-inspiring aspects of finding ‘The One’ is the unique ability to feel completely alone together, even in the midst of a crowded room. It’s as if the world around us fades into the background, and the only thing that matters is the connection we share with that special person. Time seems to stand still, conversations become whispers, and the energy between the two individuals becomes palpable. In those moments, the rest of the world becomes irrelevant, and it’s just the two of them in their own little universe.

Cherish these signs and nurture the chemistry that makes your relationship special, and remember, a match made in heaven isn’t always about perfection; it’s about creating your own unique paradise together.

In the hustle and bustle of our fast-paced lives, it’s all too easy for the flames of romance to flicker and fade. The demands of work, family, and personal commitments often leave little time and energy for nurturing our relationships. However, building a healthy and vibrant connection with your partner is crucial for both your individual well-being and the longevity of your relationship.

So, if you find yourself in a situation where your partner’s busyness has caused a strain, fear not! In this article, we will explore creative and effective ways to reconnect and rejuvenate your relationship with your busy partner. India’s eminent marriage counselor, Shivani Misri Sadhoo is here to guide you.

1. Open Communication:

The foundation of any successful relationship lies in open and honest communication. Set aside dedicated time each day to engage in meaningful conversations with your partner. Create an atmosphere of trust where both of you can openly express your thoughts, concerns, and dreams. Effective communication builds understanding and empathy, fostering a deeper connection between partners.

2. Quality over Quantity:

While it may be challenging to find large blocks of time together, focus on the quality of the time you do have. Plan activities or outings that both partners enjoy and that allow for meaningful connection. It could be as simple as a romantic dinner at home, a walk in the park, or a weekend getaway. By maximizing the quality of your time spent together, you can create cherished memories and rekindle the spark in your relationship.

3. Surprise Gestures: 

Small, thoughtful gestures can go a long way in rekindling the spark in your relationship. Surprise your partner with their favorite meal, leave a heartfelt note in their briefcase or purse, or plan a surprise outing that aligns with their interests. These simple acts demonstrate your love and appreciation, creating moments of delight and reinforcing the emotional bond between you. Use technology for good. Sending text messages to your partner is a wonderful way to maintain a connection, share small moments, and show you care.

4. Support and Understanding: 

Acknowledge and validate the challenges your partner faces due to their busy schedule. Show genuine interest in their work and offer support whenever possible. By demonstrating understanding and empathy, you build a strong foundation of trust and solidarity. Your partner will feel valued and cherished, fostering a sense of belonging within the relationship.

5. Shared Hobbies and Interests: 

Finding common ground and engaging in shared hobbies can infuse new energy into your relationship. Discover activities that you both enjoy and make time for them regularly. Whether it’s cooking, dancing, hiking, or painting, the shared experiences will create lasting memories and deepen your bond.

6. Save the date: 

Intentionally carve out time in both of your calendars for regular date nights. This dedicated time allows you to focus solely on each other, away from the distractions of work and daily responsibilities. Whether it’s a candlelit dinner, a movie night, or a cozy evening, make it a habit to schedule these dates to strengthen the bond and keep the romance alive.

7. Tender Touch: 

Physical intimacy is an integral part of any romantic relationship. Find moments to express affection, even amidst busy schedules. A warm hug, a gentle touch, or a passionate kiss can communicate love and desire. Prioritize intimacy and make it a regular part of your routine, reigniting the passion and desire within your relationship.

So, take the first step today, and embark on a path toward reconnecting and rejuvenating your relationship with your busy partner. Together, you can create a love that withstands the tests of time and nourishes your soul for a lifetime.

Emotional neglect happens when the emotional needs of an individual are disregarded or are not valued in a relationship. For the one on the receiving end of the neglect, it could be traumatizing and could harm their psyche. Sadly, emotional neglect in marriage is mostly swept under the rug, simply because it is not as visible as physical pain. Some couples may not even realize that they are suffering from the effects of emotional neglect in their relationship.

Signs of emotional neglect in Marriage

The first thing you require to do is to identify the signs that you are suffering from emotional neglect in your marriage. As each marriage dynamic is distinct, its manifestations in your relationship are also different.

However, there are certain tell-tale signs to look out for:

• You feel alone in your relationship.
• You will rather spend time alone than be with your partner.
• You do not engage in any social activities together.
• You are shut down by your spouse when you talk.
• You repeatedly suppress your feelings
• You do not feel that you can be yourself around your partner
• You are not clear about what your spouse wants from you

How Does Emotional Neglect Damage Relationships?

Shivani Sadhoo says emotional neglect is the bane of several marriages.

It is damaging to a relationship since emotional support is one of the core bases to a successful marriage. When there is emotional support, affection, and intimacy also follow. And without affection and intimacy, both partners will become unhappy. The level of emotional support in each marriage differs according to the different emotional needs of the partners involved. Emotional neglect is contextually relative; the extent of what is defined as neglectful conduct varies on a case-to-case basis.

Delhi’s top marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares some tips to cope with emotional neglect in marriage.

Do not play the victim

It certainly hurts when your spouse is not fulfilling your emotional needs. However, this is no reason to play the victim card. If you do that, it will simply worsen the situation. You end up in a blame game and that does no favour for your relationship. 

The finest way to deal with it is to talk directly to your partner. Let them know how you feel and where you think they are lacking. When talking to your spouse, make certain you do it in a respectful and honest manner. There is no problem in a marriage that open and honest communication cannot fix. This is one of them.

Work through it together

A marriage is a two-way relationship. You cannot fix a problem if there is just one interested party. Both parties should make an equal effort at fixing a problem.

Once you open up to your partner, you require to openly discuss and agree on what steps you require to take to fix the problem. To begin, you can speak up whenever you see any signs of their neglectful conduct. In that manner, they will be able to identify when they are doing something incorrect. Awareness of their behaviour is a good beginning when correcting this issue in your marriage. 

Address the cause

When you face problems in your marriage, the first task to do is to identify the underlying cause for such an issue. You can also use the same procedure in this situation. Before you react to your partner’s behaviour, think about what could be causing it.

• Is this a recent problem or has your partner been in this manner since the beginning of your marriage? 

• Is it potentially triggered by an event or situation? 
• Has there been a sudden alteration in your spouse’s behaviour? 

If the behavioural pattern is triggered by a situation, then your probabilities of fixing it are far better than if it were part of your relationship from the beginning. 

Be proactive

When you are suffering emotional neglect from your spouse, it may be a good time to assess yourself too. Are you neglecting your spouse in other ways? 

Every individual’s requirements are different. Some individuals value emotional support while others value physical intimacy in a marriage. Whatever it is that is the priority of an individual, make it a habit to be aware of it and do your best to fulfil those requirements the best way you can. 

Make time together

Most problems in a marriage can be resolved by making an effort to spend quality time and doing something together. For example, you can travel together or have date nights once a week. 

Marriage can be hard work. While you have this idea of a happily ever after, it cannot be denied that you will experience ups and downs in your marriage. By staying committed to each other, you can overcome these marital issues. 

See a counsellor

A professional counselor is a great choice if you want to resolve conflicts in your marriage like emotional neglect. A counselor can provide an objective and outsider point of view of your problems. 

The counselor could provide some insights into your marital problems that you may not be able to see since you are emotionally and directly involved in the relationship. The counselor can even suggest methods to resolve these problems by assessing the dynamics of your relationship. 

Many couples are hesitant to see a counselor due to the stigma linked with it. However, there is nothing wrong with seeking assistance in order to work through your relationship issues, especially if it means saving your marriage. 

Tips Shared by India’s Eminent Marriage Counselor Shivani Sadhoo

There is always something exciting about first dates. It’s like the feeling of anticipation before a rollercoaster ride – both thrilling and nerve-racking. Getting to know someone new can be a fun and exhilarating adventure, full of surprises and unexpected turns. The early days of a relationship are filled with excitement and optimism which can be both exhilarating and overwhelming, says Shivani.

There is also the pressure to make a good impression and the uncertainty of whether the relationship will last. But, ultimately, it can also be the start of something special and meaningful. With each new step, there is potential for both joy and disappointment, and it can be difficult to know what to expect.

You don’t know if the connection will be strong, if the chemistry will be there, or if you’ll even want to take it to the next level. Amid all this excitement, you may even make a few silly mistakes on your first date. So, let’s find out more about these mistakes and ways to avoid them from Delhi’s top couples therapist and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo.

Don’t be late

Punctuality is very important for a positive first impression on your first date. It conveys that you are serious, responsible, and considerate of the other person’s time. Showing up late can make the other person feel unappreciated and can set a negative tone for the evening. Make sure to call or text your date in case you’re running late.

 Don’t overdress

While it is imperative to dress nicely for your first date, there is no need to go overboard with it. Wearing something a bit more casual will help you relax and feel more comfortable, confident, and authentic. Dressing for a first date is like seasoning a dish – too much and it will be overwhelming, but the right amount will enhance the flavor and the experience. For example, if you’re going out for dinner, wear a nice pair of jeans with a dress shirt, or a dressy skirt with a casual top. Accessorize with subtle jewelry and stylish shoes to complete your look and make a lasting impression.

Be Polite, not Arrogant

On your first date, be polite, not arrogant. Arrogance can come off as too aggressive or demanding and can make the other person feel uncomfortable or intimidated. Being polite shows that you’re respectful and willing to listen to the other person and make them feel comfortable. For instance, when you first meet, greet the other person with a warm smile, eye contact, and a firm handshake.

Ditch your mobile phone

Ditch that mobile phone when you’re on your first date. Having a phone on the table besides being distracting can also show your disinterest in the conversation which can be off-putting for your date. Instead, put your gadgets on silent to make your evening meaningful.

 Don’t brag

Bragging is a huge turn-off on a first date. It can be interpreted as a sign of insecurity or arrogance, and it creates an imbalance in the conversation, making it one-sided and uncomfortable. Be humble and modest.

Now that you are aware of what to avoid, you can confidently embark on your dating journey!        

According to India’s Top Marriage Counselor Shivani Sadhoo

Couples Therapist Shivani Sadhoo says all these years as a psychologist and marriage counselor, she has carefully observed the attitudes and behaviors of people who consistently succeeded in their long-term intimate relationships.

Several of those qualities are evident in a new relationship but are mostly much less vital in the long run. This blog from India’s leading marriage counsellor shares a few gender-free, common examples.

Shivani Sadhoo opines that although these are all essential requirements most people look for in new relationships, they are, in all truth, driven by the personal qualities that lie beneath them, and those characteristics are not always sustainable over time.

But there are a few personal qualities that are guaranteed to sustain and deepen love and commitment amongst the couple over time that is mostly not as evident early in new relationships. They crop up over time and are driven by the core beliefs and personal philosophies of those who are determined to lead and live a meaningful life in whatever endeavours they participate in. These are some of the qualities.

Humility

Quite a wise person once said that the roots of humility and humiliation are the same: being on your knees. If you are being pushed into that position, you will feel humiliated. It is so much simpler to comfortably stay humble, and deeply grateful for the capacity to be in amazement and wonderment of the experiences that keep everyone worshipping the blessings of life.

Fairness

Agreements and the rules that define those are mutually opted by both individuals in an intimate relationship. Fairness is the commitment to either live by those sacred alliances or to go for renegotiation if they no longer assist the relationship’s ideals and principles. When there is mutual fairness, score-keeping never exists.

Courage

It is most scary to take the risks required to challenge oneself and others in a long-term relationship when the outcomes might be difficult to bear. Yet, your thoughts, beliefs, and actions withheld to maintain a questionable harmony mostly backfire when those pent-up behaviors erupt. When a couple supports one another to stay present and real, they can better face the truth of what is.

Translucence

Honesty, authenticity, and transparency are the foundations of trust. They predict whether your partners will be who they say they are or not. Gaslighting and ghosting never exist in these relationships. The people in these partnerships make mutual decisions formed based on reality rather than assumptions formed in confusion and conflict.

Resilience

There will always be hurdles in every relationship, both from within and without, and certain couples have more than their share of losses. Yet, remaining broken and buried by those legitimate heartbreaks probably steals time and energy from recuperation. Though a few people are simply born with more capacity to rebound, resilience can also be learned. The past is for lessons, not for rehashing or reasons to helplessly fall down again in defeat. The present is for debriefing what went on, what was learned, and what could be done differently in the coming time.

Interested and Interesting

Long-term relationships quite often fall prey to the same-old predictable interactions. Though it is most comforting and more secure to know what your spouse might or might not do, it is never as compelling as new thoughts and personal transformations. Couples who balance commitment to their relationship with constant personal transformation are the most probably to keep each other engaged.

Accountability

No relationship is able to survive an unequal responsibility for the things that go wrong. Nor can it tolerate promises for transformation that never materialize. Accountability will only serve its purpose if behavior alteration follows the recognition of contribution. Certain behaviors are much more difficult to change and attachments could get in the way, but being aware, open, and honest about one’s own frailties goes a long way when repairing is mandatory.

Humor

Seeing the lightness in things while they get too heavy. Relieving tension in self and others. Laughing at yourself. Making others feel good. Shaking off your own sadness. These are critical reasons for humor being a wonderful quality that mostly helps a situation heal. But it is also true that humor can also be used as a tool for wounding. When humor is used as sarcasm, mocking, or teasing, or an effort to get out of accountability, it is not healthy relationship conduct.

Chivalry

Almost every relationship is, for the most part, transactional. You all strive to keep your commitments but, certainly, reasonably expect reciprocity when you need it in return. But the fairness that forces those agreements sometimes should be upended by an unexpected crisis that needs giving beyond the fairness that is generally present. Chivalry is an act of selfless motive that comes from a different part of the self. It is a non-conflicted work of giving without any expectation of getting.

Nurturing

You are always all the ages you have ever been, and there are times when the child in you desperately requires a safe haven to feel, to cry, to complain, and even to yell powerlessly. The nurturing that is needed for any intimate relationship to thrive is the simple comfort of a pseudo-parent-child interaction sans judgment. Being able to crawl into the haven of loving arms not just can heal the moment but also heal the trauma that might have driven it.

Ease with self

Those lucky souls who know who they are, what they can give, what they require in return, and who live life equivalent to what they expect of others are individuals who have suffered their losses and rejoiced in their joys. They have found methods to integrate the completeness of their life experiences in a composite of quiet confidence. They are at ease with believing what they presently know and are still open to altering their perspective as new experiences enter their lives.

Suggests Marriage Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the plethora of “quick fix” relationship advice offered by various books, magazines, blogs, and daytime TV talk shows? Though there is no doubt it is presented with good intent, much of this advice is terribly contradictory. Such as a quick-fix weight loss program, it abandons any effort to support hypotheses with research, basing guidance rather on personal opinion and anecdotal evidence.

Probably, the most prominent quick-fix advice is that communication – and more categorically, learning to resolve your conflicts – is the key to romance and an enduring, happy relationship. This notion is a myth, and it is hardly the only misconception out there. Myths are destructive to your relationship because they can lead couples down the wrong way, or worse, convince them that their relationship is a hopeless scenario, says Shivani Sadhoo.

Through this blog, leading marriage counsellor and couples therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo talks about the most common myths about relationships.

Communicating and employing active listening skills in trying to reach conflict resolution will save your relationship

While active listening is surely a useful skill, it alone cannot save your relationship. As Dr. Gottman points out, “even happily married couples can have screaming matches – loud arguments don’t necessarily doom a marriage.” We all have our disagreements, in a range of different ways. So go ahead, break all those active listening rules! Bear in mind your affection and respect for each other, and remember that using a softened startup when bringing up a problem can override natural variations in conflict style.

Neuroses or personality issues ruin a marriage

Everyone has issues they are not totally rational about, but they do not necessarily interfere with our relationships. The secret to a happy relationship is not having a “normal” personality but finding someone with whom you mesh. For instance, a person has a problem dealing with authority – he hates having a boss. If he were in a relationship having an authoritarian partner who tended to give commands and looked to tell him what to do, the outcome would be disastrous. The point is that neuroses do not have to ruin a relationship. What matters is the way you deal with them. If you can accommodate each other’s strange aspects with care, affection, and respect, your relationship can thrive.

Common interests bind you together

It depends on the way you can interact while pursuing those interests. Imagine that you and your partner are walking hand in hand inside your favorite used book store, smelling that old book smell, coffee in hand, headed for the “Literature” section. Romance is in the air. But wait! Just around the corner in “Politics,” a couple seems to be having an argument! Books are flying and tempers are flaring. “You stupid! He will never get sufficient electoral votes!” Clearly, enjoying the same activities could create an incredibly strong bonding between you and your partner, but these activities could also be a source of tension, depending on the way you interact while pursuing your common interests.

You scratch my back and…

It looks to make sense that deals must be made in order to maintain a sense of fairness and balance and that in romance a kiss must meet a kiss and a smile meet a smile. In reality, deal-making and contracts, quid pro quo, mostly are done in unhappy marriages. Do not keep score. Build bonding and strengthen your relationship by freely providing each other with positive overtures and support.

Dodging conflict will ruin your marriage

Everyone has separate methods of dealing with disagreements. A continuous barrage of honest criticism, for instance, might not be the best policy. An example here is when you head to the living room to watch the game, rather than getting in a tiff with you about the noise and constant TV watching, your wife goes for a run and comes back feeling better. When you are upset with your wife, you go into the backyard to play catch with your kids. Each of you finds a way to self-soothe, and both of you go on as if nothing happened. Finding a middle path that you both can agree on can let you talk things out when you truly need to while averting clashes over every trivial matter.

Affairs are the primary cause of divorce

In several cases, it is the other way around. According to a project it was found that around 80% of divorced men and women cited growing apart and loss of a sense of closeness to their partner as reasons for divorce, as opposed to just 20-27% blaming their separation on an extramarital affair. The reality is that most affairs are not started in an attempt to quench an unfulfilled desire for physical intimacy, but rather in an attempt to find friendship, support, attention, caring, concern, and respect beyond a relationship that feels lacking in these qualities.

Men are not biologically, “created” for marriage

Specific, theorists call upon natural evolutionary differences between males and females to argue that men have always been predisposed to have as many offspring as they can and follow successful reproduction with one female with a fast sprint to the next available, while women are inclined to nurture their young and look to keep the father close for protection. The conclusion they had is that men are just biologically more likely to have affairs. This is, in modern times, not a particularly worthy or accurate observation. It has been found out that affairs have to do with the availability of potential partners. According to one theorist, since women have entered the workplace in huge numbers, the number of extramarital affairs of young women now slightly exceeds that of men.

Men and women hail from different planets

You have all heard that men are from Mars and women are from Venus. This specific notion you may dispose of easily. Here is math for you. Dr. Gottman says that “the deciding factor in whether wives feel satisfied with the physical intimacy, romance, and passion in their marriage is, by around 70%, the quality of the couple’s friendship… and for men, the deciding factor is, by 70%, the quality of the couple’s friendship, so men and women come from the same planet after all.”

Relationships perhaps always start with wild, head-over-heels feelings of attraction and devotion. On its own, however, love is simply not enough. Shivani Sadhoo reveals some of the most common barriers between you, your partner, and long-lasting passion.

This blog by Couples Therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo highlights the facts when love is simply not enough.

Ah…love! Certainly, a hot and tricky topic says Shivani—and while many agree that good love takes time and effort, one also needs to know that love falls apart when the ball gets dropped in specific ways.

Everyone says we want it; but once they find it, why is it so damn difficult to keep it?

Here are some ways when you or your partner unwittingly ruin your love.

Brush Aside Past Pain

This one is huge. Once a person passes the age of 16, the possibility of experiencing hurt, disappointment, or betrayal is 100%. Not taking the needed time to feel the pain from your past keeps it alive and present in the here and now. One may love the ones you are with, but you also project all over them.

When you have old pain that has not been processed, you carry it into our present relationship. You cannot skim over or positively think your route out of emotional pain, and when you try to stuff your emotions, you will find a method to make your current partner pay for the past sins or wrongdoings of others because pain wants to be processed. Take care of your past so your present can be happy.

Safeguarding yourself Emotionally

Placing one foot out emotionally to safeguard yourself just in case things do not work out is like trying to constantly drive 40 km/hour while tapping your brake every other minute. You are not going to reach anywhere in love by holding back. Sure, respect your own boundaries, but remember falling in love is simply that—freely falling. Too frequently one experience hurts and never actually lets go again. Take your foot from the brake and trust.

Over – Thinking all the Things

Have you heard the phrase “paralysis by analysis”? Over-thinking and over-analyzing someone’s every word, move or intention dampens any chance of intimacy or connection.

Worrying and attempting to figure out someone’s intention vs taking them at face value is a sign of emotionally functioning from the past in an attempt to stay safe in the present. It is hypervigilance at its best and that best exposes out your worst.  Even if your present lover has hurt you in the past, expecting them to hurt you again certainly guarantees they will because you are hypersensitive vs relaxed and present. Remember, you see what you expect to see—remain and live in the now moment.

Stop Making Eye Contact

It is said and believed that “Eyes are the windows to your soul”.

Let’s accept it, life is busy and over time it becomes far too easy to navigate getting out of the house in the morning without even making eye contact with the one you love. It might sound small, but eye contact is intimate. Intimacy in the bedroom begins with intimate contact throughout the day. Look at each other.

Assume you Know your Loved One Completely

Even if you know each other from their birth, spent every single day together, and have talked for hours, there is no method to know everything about another human being. You are all individuals with individual perceptions, thoughts, and emotional experiences.

People change over time, so never assume that you know completely about your partner’s hopes, dreams, aspirations, and desires. Because the reality is, it’s not possible to know everything about one another no matter how long you’ve been living together.

Stop Touching

The two biggest influences on your sex drive come from your skin and your brain. Relationships are hot initially, because you are touching and kissing, as well as talking and questioning each other—constantly. Stimulation of the brain got covered in the above part, so let us move on to touching.

As time passes, several couples get lazy about touching for no specific reason. When you touch the one you love, the hormone oxytocin is produced and presents a huge opportunity for connection. Oxytocin is just like a powerful love tonic. Talking stimulates your brain, while touching stimulates everything else. Touch each other a lot.

Your Therapist Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control the pandemic’s spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of coronavirus, we hope to offer our therapeutic help. Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high.

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option. Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service!

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.