Explains Top Couples Therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo
It is often said that marriages are made in heaven. But not all of them last forever. Many marriages do not stand the test of time and end in divorce or separation. Nowadays, Live-in relationships are becoming more common, as they offer people an alternative to marriage. This allows couples to experiment and find out if they are compatible before taking the step of marriage. However, these relationships can be just as fragile and many end up in breakups.
Despite being legally accepted, live-in relationships in India are still frowned upon by many because they go against traditional values and beliefs. Though the freedom such relationships offer is often attractive, they come with their own set of challenges and complications. Let’s find out more about the challenges of live-in relationships in India from Shivani Misri Sadhoo, the top marriage counsellor and relationship expert.
Live-in relationships in India are still considered social taboos. This is because traditional Indian culture emphasizes the importance of marriage as a sacred institution. So, staying together before marriage is seen as a kind of disobedience to the established norms. Social stigma has led to many couples living in secret. People treat you like outcasts.
Lack of commitment
Lack of commitment is a big problem in live-in relationships. People in live-in relationships tend to take each other for granted and do not work towards making it a long-term commitment. This can lead to a lack of trust, communication, and overall stability in the relationship.
Freedom seems to be a double-edged sword in these types of relationships, as it can lead to more misunderstandings and a lack of security. This can result in the dissolution of the relationship, leaving both parties feeling frustrated and hurt.
Finding shelter is a big challenge
Finding a house for unmarried couples in India is a big challenge. Either it is difficult to locate a landlord who is willing to rent a house to unmarried couples or even if they find one, the couple may face discrimination and judgment from their neighbours. This creates a huge obstacle for unmarried couples looking for a place to call home.
It is common for people in live-in relationships to struggle with their finances. It can be difficult to combine two different incomes and expenses in a way that is mutually beneficial. This can lead to financial stress, which can in turn put a strain on the relationship.
Conflict pertaining to career choices
In live-in relationships, career challenges can be tricky. Since there is no legal commitment between the partners, they often have to make compromises when it comes to career decisions.
For example, when one partner receives a job offer in another city/country either through promotion or simply as a better career prospect, he or she must decide whether to accept the offer or not, while considering the impact it would have on their relationship. This can create feelings of resentment and frustration in the relationship.
Family plays a crucial role in shaping relationships in India. In live-in relationships, family opinion is often considered more important than that of the couple. This often leads to pressure on the couple to conform to the family’s expectations instead of making their own decisions. As a result, many couples opt to continue their relationships in secret or even break up.
Love and commitment should be at the heart of any relationship. Whether it is a marriage or a live-in relationship, both partners need to be willing to put in the effort to make it work.