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5 WAYS TO OVERCOME ROMANTIC REJECTION

Nobody likes being rejected. When it comes to love, you put many of your hopes, emptiness, and traumas out into the open. Therefore, getting over romantic rejection is sometimes quite difficult. But it always depends.

The loss of great love can be devastating if you carry inside the unhealthy seed of feeling abandoned. It can also hurt when your age catches up to, or if you are on a time in your lives when you are really vulnerable. If there is cheating that might also make getting over romantic rejection very hard.

In spite of all the happenings, there is always a way out. Getting up and moving ahead is never easy, but it’s not impossible.

In this article, Delhi’s top Relationship Expert and Marriage Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo reveals 5 ways to overcome romantic rejection.

Getting Over Romantic Rejection By Checking Your Wounds

The first thing you must do, even when it hurts, is to pull off your improvised bandage and check the magnitude of your wound. What did you actually lose?

It is essential that you answer that question with sheer honesty. Sometimes you aren’t losing the love of your life, as you may believe, just illusions and expectations.

It’s quite possible that the most painful thing is not the loss itself. Sometimes, your ego hurts more. Probably, it brought up your old doubts about yourself because your self-love is already hurt.

The loss only shows you that reality without anesthesia. For getting over romantic rejection, you must look at what you had invested in that relationship.

Express Yourself By Every Possible Way

Feelings that are not expressed mostly turn into pain. Particularly, when it comes to negative feelings. This is why you must use all possible ways to let them out.

There are several kinds of ways to do it, not just talking time and again about what happened. You can write, for instance. As much as needed.

You can even paint your pain or you can dance. Anything that allows you to free those feelings is valid.

Refocus

Because of the psychological impact of the loss, you are might be thinking gloomy thoughts. Without realizing it, you start to focus only on the most negative aspects of everything. You unwittingly select the most painful interpretations of the facts and you focus on all the negative things in the world.

But refrained getting carried away by it. What you must do is refocus your attention in a more constructive way. Never allow the pain to invade your whole being, because it won’t give you anything but bitterness.

Aim to bring positive thoughts into your mind. Engage your will in appreciating all the good that still exists. This will be a huge help for getting over romantic rejection.

Free Yourself From Unrealistic Thoughts

Our society insists that loss or failure is totally unwanted. But it has been completely proven that this is not true. First, because situations like this are inevitable. Every human being goes through failure. And secondly, since there is no bigger opportunity to grow than from difficult experiences.

Romantic rejection is not the end of the world. Despite what soap operas and songs depict. In fact, it’s completely the opposite. Every ending also marks a beginning. What happens should happen. And it is always positive if you want it to be positive.

Take Advantage Of This Chance To Make Changes In Your Life

If you think you cannot continue living like this, good. It is time for you to focus on changing. Do not think about the person you have lost, think about other aspects of your life.

There’s always something to throw away, there’s always something to begin. Focus on that.

Nothing is better for overcoming a romantic rejection than to introduce fresh things to your life. Learning something new is always a great choice.

It keeps your mind occupied and that raises your eyes up to focus on new areas. It’s also great to change up your social circles or work on developing new habits.

You should be aware that nothing you do will automatically take away the pain. Wounds to the heart always take time to heal. Do not hurry.

Tolerate suffering and think about how it helps you to go ahead. Feed hope and do not fall into the trap of isolation. Believe that everything will turn out well. 

THINGS TO DO ON YOUR HONEYMOON IF YOU HAVE AN ARRANGED MARRIAGE

Considering a fact when you have an arranged marriage honeymoon seems to be a big deal. In the case of love marriage, the couple knows each other very well and has already spent a lot of time in a relationship with each other before their marriage. But in the case of an arranged marriage, they don’t get much time to spend with each other and still have much more to explore about their partner.

For an arranged marriage couple honeymoon is considered to be most important as in this short span of time there is a lot of things to be accomplished beyond knowing each other and as afterward, they get caught up settling in the new life and roles, trying to adjust and overcoming the post-marriage drama, duties, and traditions. So, it is the honeymoon period in an arranged marriage which is the best way to get closer and bond well with each other.

In arranged marriages, the honeymoon is a kind of icebreaker for the couple. For a couple who have never been together for a long time, it could be the best way to explore inexperienced territories.

In this article, Delhi’s top marriage counselor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo talk about things to do on your honeymoon, if you have an arranged marriage.

Time To Celebrate Intimacy

It is your chance to finally spend some quality time with each other post all the wedding ritual stress. It is these memories you can cherish for a lifetime. The honeymoon is supposed to connect you physically with your partner, but it’s major fact being that it is about connecting with each other mentally, emotionally and physically.

A Proper Destination

Honeymoon is not about spending time together at some place, it is important to choose a tranquil and an apt place to spend quality time together. Choosing a destination that offers the activities that may interest both of you to participate and bond well.

Putting Your Mobiles Aside

During your honeymoon, make it a point to put your mobile phones away. It is your quality time to be spent time together in discovering each other. It’s no urgency to keep everyone updated socially including your family members. You may call once a day but you just don’t get into giving updates about your day to your family. Treat this time as a digital detox and put all your gadgets away. Carrying a camera to click pictures sounds good.

Take It Easy And Just Relax

Honeymooner is expected to relax and rejuvenate. Often in arranged marriages, couples don’t get an opportunity to know each other so well and it is a perfect time to know each other. Don’t plan it in such a way that you keep on moving from one place to another or with days fully packed with activities. Avoid stress during your honeymoon.

Spend At Least A Day In The Bed

At times, doing nothing is the best thing ever. Have no plans and just spend the time in each other’s company all alone, share secrets and whisper sweet nothings might be just all that you need. Spend your day being lazy and cozying up with each other and having lunch or brunch in the bed might add flavor to your romance.

Experience Newer Things

Start exploring the place you choose for a honeymoon with your better half, try something new which you have never done before and made the trip as the most memorable one.

Enjoy The Closeness

It is your chance to take things further in your relationship. It’s not all about sex. Don’t focus too much on it or make it stressful for you both. The honeymoon is not all about sex, don’t go with those fantasized expectations. Just let it go and be with the flow.

Woo him or her on the honeymoon by doing these things

·         You had an arranged marriage and is a possibility that you have not have proposed each other even once. Make him or her happy by getting down on your knees and proposing and show your love.

·         Compliment each other. It’s a way to warm people’s heart and when you do compliment your partner it will make them feel special.

·         Showing interest in their interested activities even when not like it that much is commended. You might not like sports which might interest your partner, still watch it with them or ask them to teach you, in a way, this will bond with each other.

Going On Dates

Even in an arranged marriage, you might have gone on dates with each other prior to your wedding. But it might not have been as romantic as it may be now. Plan a surprise as evening date and take your partner to a fancy restaurant and cherish each other’s presence.

5 TIPS TO AVOID A BREAKDOWN IN RELATIONSHIP

Do you feel that your relationship is nearing an end? Avoiding a breakdown in a relationship asks efforts, particularly dealing with relationship issues such as physical disloyalty, anxiety, health issue, a shortage of quality time spending, or an emotional matter.

Even in the absence of non-occurrence of the above-said issues, still maintaining a healthy relationship asks for years of mutual promise, understanding, and honesty amongst the partners, they need to recommit & reaffirm each other often.

In this article, Delhi’s top marriage counselor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo talks about 5 tips to avoid a breakdown in the relationship.

Building Trust

One of the most important tip to avoid a breakdown in the relationship is to start working on building trust mutually since numerous issues in a relationship originates from this factor alone.

Never question your partner if they have never given you a reason to doubt them. And if in past trust has been broken, put efforts in repairing the bond. When you can’t trust your partner, you won’t be able to depend on them emotionally or otherwise, which is not a good sign of a healthy relationship.

Building trust needs time & effort, but you can gradually progress by being honest with your partner. Being modest, being transparent in your actions, and always stand with your word can make your partner trust and admire being in a relationship with you.

Maintaining A Healthy Sex Life

Passion is an integral part of marriage that just cannot be ignored. Being sexually close as a couple is one of the fastest ways you bond with your partner, while it is a private, enjoyable and sexual expression that is shared between you two. With all those pumping adrenaline, dopamine, and oxytocin levels of hormones that gush through your body after getting intimate with your partner bring you and your partner closer.

Sex is also considered to have health benefits, as it helps reduces stress, your sleep is better, it lessens pain and builds a good immune system of you two.

More notably, it promotes a sense of gratification in a relationship. Some findings of the scientific study revealed the fact that in relationship couples showed a significant association between nuptial satisfaction and sexual satisfaction. Having a great sex life helps you and your spouse feel intimate and tolerate minor character flaws of another.

Communication

If you want to take just one tip out of this list to your heart, then consider this one as the most crucial one that: in order to avoid issues in a relationship, you and your partner must invest in learning how to communicate with each other.

Often partners unwilling to listen, talk, or empathizes with each other are on the path of the collapse of a relationship. It is this harmful behavior that conveys to your partner your insignificance of their time and respect. It is misunderstanding which may arise when partners don’t understand where the other is approaching from, or what they tend to convey.

Good communication will help to avoid arguments. It also boosts the bond between you two and helps letting you know each other better. However, you need to be eager to be at risk and have patience and put it ineffective to work.

Tackling The Problems The Right Way

In relationship couples often have arguments. Learn how to resolve your issues the right way tends to help in avoiding a breakdown in a relationship in the future. By following these 3 steps this can be achieved.

Listening: When an issue arises, let your partner voice their views & feelings on the matter. Let them speak up, uninterrupted, and with an open mind think what they are saying.

Communicating: Explaining your perspective in a calmer and respectful manner is needed. Do not yell, fight openly in public, or attacking your partner’s character. Instead, speak to solve the issue at once. Tackle the problem, not your partner.

Resolving: This one is the final step. In relationship issues, meet your partner at a suitable time and discuss how you both can fix the issue. You should mutually be willing to apologize in case they are in the wrong, or reconcile and meet somewhere “in the middle” to resolve it.

Taking Time Out For Each Other

Often Life can be hectic, but it shouldn’t be an excuse to ignore your partner.
Don’t let it become a habit that prevents you from spending as much time together as you would like, due to reasons that maybe work stress and concerns like family problems or health issues.


It can be very dangerous for a relationship which makes a partner feel like they are not worthy of another’s time or when work is chosen over relationships, or when friendships or child-rearing is set as a top priority above your relationship.


Do take quality time out for one another, that is by arranging a regular date night, or by arranging a routine activity together. Routine activity maybe like talking for an hour before bedtime, sitting and eating dinner at the table every night, or having a chat in the morning at the coffee table before you head off to your work.

It is a simple yet vital fact that doesn’t let small or big relationship issues dampen your relationship. Try to communicate, daily appreciate each other and invest in building trust in each other.

Essential Tips To Let Go Off a Failed Relationship – By Marriage Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo

If you have been blindsided or confused by a breakup, you’re probably thinking about what exactly went wrong. You likely have plenty of unanswered questions that are hindering you from moving forward. But rather than staying stuck in one place once your relationship has ended, it is essential to ease yourself out of your rut and start moving further.

In this article, Delhi’s renowned marriage Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares essential tips to let go of a failed relationship.

After all, the only way to gain a sense of freedom following a breakup is to accept the real situation and move in a new direction.

Cut Ties with Your Ex

First and foremost, implement a no-contact rule. For instance, if you were married and have recently filed for divorce, insist on maintaining only minimal contact going forward. And when you do see each other, follow the given rules: Be polite, be concise and be gone. The important part is that you need to begin building a life without your ex-partner in it, no matter how much you would like to tie up loose ends or get your questions about the breakup answered.

It does not matter why you broke up, what matters is that you have broken up. If he wasn’t a person enough to tell you why your partner was breaking up with you, then that’s just a further sign that he or she is not a person you want in your life.

Remember That It Is Over For a Reason

Write down a minimum of 10 reasons why your relationship didn’t work out. Then read it whenever you find yourself craving to rekindle the flame. It’s important to realize that the relationship wasn’t perfect.

Our tendency is to look back blindingly, but we forget to look at the things that simply were not working. Be honest with yourself about what wasn’t working for you in your relationship; it is a process that will help you see the relationship from a more realistic angle.

By looking at the things that did not work, you can begin to come to the conclusion on your own that this wasn’t correct for both of you. It will help you move on.

Remove Your Ex from Your Social Media Networks

Unfriend your ex on Facebook, stop following him/her on Twitter and even consider doing the same with any close friends of his who you have connected with through social media. If you can’t, you’ll have the temptation of wanting to know what’s happening in his life – and you almost cannot help following what’s going on.

It will seem harsh, but if you keep seeing or checking updates from your ex or his friends, it’s a kind of self-torture. Stop making yourself available to these types of experiences immediately.

Start Moving Forward In Your Life

There is a saying that the best revenge is living well and we’re inclined to believe that sentiment. Instead of pining away over something that didn’t work out, it is better using all that time and energy to improve yourself.

This is the time to take a good look at your priorities and find out which direction you want to go. You can start marching towards your brilliant future sooner than you actually think.

Whether you like it or not, your relationship has come to an end. The quicker you get on with the rest of your life, the better off you’ll be. Stop trying to find out what went wrong or what you could have done differently, and instead just accept your situation for what it is so you could heal.

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6 Ways You Can Improve Your Mental Health

Mental health consists of our emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It impacts how we think, feel, and act. It also helps identify how we handle stress, relate to others, and make choices. Mental health is important at every stage of life, from childhood and adolescence through adulthood.

Mental health is a lot more than a diagnosis. And while taking care of your mental health might mean seeking professional support and treatment, it also means taking steps to better your emotional health on your own.

Making these alterations will pay off in all aspects of your life. It can boost your mood, build resilience, and add to your overall enjoyment and satisfaction with life. Eminent psychologist, marriage counselor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo share 6 ways to improve your mental health.

1.  Always Tell Yourself Something Positive

Some research shows that how you think about yourself can have a huge effect on how you feel. When we understand ourselves and our life negatively, we can end up seeing experiences in a way that confirms that belief. Instead, practice using words that promote feelings of self-worth and personal power.

For instance, instead of saying, I am a loser. I won’t get the job because I struggled in the interview, try saying, I didn’t do as well in the interview as I could have, but it doesn’t mean I’m not going to get the job.

2.  Focus on One Thing at A Given Time

Being aware of the current moment lets you let go of negative or difficult emotions from past experiences that put us down. Begin by bringing awareness to routine activities, such as taking a bath, eating lunch, or exercising. Paying attention to the physical sensations, sounds, smells, or tastes of these experiences aids your focus. When your mind wavers, just bring it back to what you currently do.

3.  Note down Something You Are Grateful For

Being grateful has been clearly linked with improved well-being and mental health, as well as happiness. The best-researched method to increase feelings of gratitude is to keep a gratitude diary or write a daily gratitude list. Usually, contemplating gratitude is also productive, but you need to get daily practice to experience long-term benefit. Find something to be grateful for, let it fill your heart, and bask in that feeling.

4.   Eat a Good Meal

The stuff you eat nourishes your whole body, including your mind and heart. Carbohydrates (in moderate amounts) increase serotonin, a chemical that has been shown to have a calming effect on your mood. Protein-rich foods increase norepinephrine, dopamine, and tyrosine, which help keep you alert.

And vegetables and fruits are loaded with nutrients that feed every cell of your body, including those that impact mood-regulating brain chemicals. Include foods with Omega-3 polyunsaturated fatty acids (found in fish, nuts, and flaxseed.) Research shows that these nutrients can improve mood and restore structural integrity to the brain cells necessary for cognitive function.

5.  Open Up To Someone

Knowing you are valued by others is essential for helping you think more positively. Additionally, being more trusting can increase your emotional well-being because as you get better at finding the positive aspects in others, you become better at recognizing your own.

6.  Do Something for Someone Else

Being helpful to others has a beneficial effect on how you feel about yourself. Being helpful and kind and valuable in what you do is a great way to build self-esteem. The meaning you find in helping others will nourish and expand your life.

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5 Ways to Make Yourself More Attractive In Any Relationship

Tips by Marriage Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo

Do you know feeling good about yourself can make you more attractive to others?  The more you can love yourself, the more your relationships can become easier and spontaneous. A person who can love
himself/herself and feel confident is a person with deep inner stability, and one who can adapt comfortably to the inevitable ups and downs that come with various relationships.

Today, renowned marriage counsellor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares 5 ways to make you more attractive in any relationship.

1.  Choose To Be Happy:

When you are happy, others sense it and feel relaxed in your presence. One way to actively be happy is to develop awareness for your internal critic that voice in your head that criticizes and judges. Surrendering yourself into your internal critic is like vaulting off a cliff into a no-zone.

This is where your internal critic will lead you if you let it. It’s your job to recognize when your critic turns on you and to tell it “Stop!”  Distract yourself with exercise, reading, listening to music, helping others, or doing creative things. Do whatever you can, but dispose of the critic as soon as you hear its voice. Time and again, choose happiness.

2.  Stop Taking Yourself Too Seriously:

You don’t need to be perfect to have stable relationships and love in your life. It’s being imperfect that puts people feel relaxed. There is a type of intimacy that takes hold, a feeling that you can be open with this person because they are being open with you. Yes, it’s important to connect with supportive and non-toxic people.

Mainly, speaking, most of the time, with most people, the negative things others communicate or imply about you are not insults to your character. Don’t give any attention to perceived slights let the small stuff slide off your back. When you’re faced with valid or invalid criticism, try if you can laugh at yourself or make a joke. In the end, you are not defined by others, no matter what they say or do.

3.   Look After Yourself:

People who look after themselves are more attractive because they exude self-discipline. Being in complete control of yourself means others don’t think you as a burden to be taken care. Eating nutritiously, exercising daily, and attending to your emotional psyche should be a part of your daily routine.

4. Do The Correct Thing:

Whenever you struggle with self-confidence, you are likely seeking the approval or suggestion of others. You’re stealthily on the lookout for praise, and a sense that you belong and are doing the correct thing. When you do this, you’re not worrying about the bigger picture because you’re too focused on yourself. A busy search for validation from others won’t certainly bring it; in fact, your insecurity may force people away from you. Instead, do the correct thing for yourself, for others, and for society by and large. Be kind to the people in your life and to those who have less listen, support, and give them your attention. See if this brings you affirmation.

5.   Live For Yourself:

A person who has a sense of purpose and meaning are irresistible because they exude strength. Concentrating on how others may or may not be judging you wastes so much time that could be utilized on getting what you expect out of life. Ask yourself questions, what gives me happiness? What would I like to achieve in this life? What provides me a feeling of being at peace? And then shut the voice in your mind that questions your choices, and start living for yourself.

About Shivani Misri Sadhoo: Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo is one of the best marriage counselors in Delhi NCR. She has served over thousands plus happy & satisfied individuals and couples in India and abroad. She is India’s best expert on Marriage and relationship issues and has frequently been featured in leading newspapers, magazines and TV channels. 

Counsellor Shivani is an experienced and certified counselling psychologist with a specialization in the area of Personal Crisis interventions like coping with Relationship Issues, Marital Counselling, Separation and divorce, Child and Adolescent issues, Depression, Stress, Loss & Grief. Counsellor Shivani is currently working with India‘s top hospital groups like Fortis Hospital, IBS (Indian Brain & Spine) Hospital and with Express Clinics.