Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

Challenges in relationships are inevitable. When both partners are willing to face the challenges hand-in-hand and act together to find win-win solutions, the majority of problems can be managed.

But many times couples lack the needed skills and tools to work through even solvable issues in their relationship. As unresolved problems, poor relationship habits, and emotional disconnection grow, the stability and spark in the relationship seem to fade. At this stage, one partner might be too eager to get some support since they know the relationship would benefit from the guidance of a professional perspective. Yet the other half is refusing to attend. 

When approaching your partner regarding attending couples therapy, you are likely to meet resistance. Certainly, people have some sort of misconceptions regarding couples therapy; they might fear “exposing” their shortcomings and feeling vulnerable, or they might believe therapy will turn them into a punching bag for the therapist and their partner.

Some couples might use therapy as a last-ditch attempt, rather than a preventative method to improve their relationship, says marriage counselor Shivani Sadhoo.

In this article, Delhi’s leading marriage counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo explores five effective ways to inspire your partner to join you in attending couples therapy, letting both of you embark on a journey towards a healthier and happier relationship.

Communicate openly and honestly

The primary step towards inspiring your partner to attend couples therapy is open and honest communication. Form a safe and non-judgmental space where you both can express your feelings and concerns. Explain why you feel therapy could be beneficial for your relationship and share your desire to work together towards resolving problems. Emphasize that therapy is not a symbol of failure, but rather a proactive step towards personal and relational growth.

Highlight the benefits of couple’s therapy

Help your partner understand the possible benefits of couple’s therapy. Discuss how therapy could provide a neutral environment for both of you to explore underlying issues, enhance communication, and gain valuable insights into each other’s perspectives.

Emphasize that therapy is an opportunity to learn new methods and strategies to enhance your relationship, boost intimacy, and strengthen the bond between you. By highlighting these benefits, you can easily alleviate any fears or misconceptions your partner may have about therapy.

Lead by example

Sometimes actions speak louder than words. Take the initiative by going for therapy yourself first, whether it is individual counselling or therapy focused on personal growth. This showcases your willingness to invest in your own well-being and shows your partner that therapy is not a one-sided endeavour.

As your partner witnesses the positive transformations you experience through therapy, they may become more willing to join you in couples therapy, realizing the potential it holds for both of you.

Give reassurance and support

Your partner might have reservations or fears related to attending couples therapy. Reassure them that you are committed to the process and that therapy is collaborative work, not an opportunity to shift blame or find fault. Assure them that therapy is a confidential space where both partners will be heard and understood. Give your support throughout the process, emphasizing that you are in this together and that attending therapy is an investment for your relationship’s future.

Explore different therapy options together

Research multiple therapy options together and find a therapist who resonates with both of you. Involve your partner in the selection procedure to ensure their comfort and engagement. Discuss different therapy modalities and methods, like cognitive-behavioural therapy, emotionally-focused therapy, or solution-focused therapy. By involving your partner in the decision-making process, you form a sense of ownership and collaboration, increasing the likelihood of their active participation in couples therapy.

Inspiring your partner to join you in attending couples therapy needs patience, understanding, and effective communication. By following these suggestions above —communicating openly, highlighting the benefits, leading by example, offering reassurance and support, and exploring therapy options together—you might inspire your partner to embark on this transformative journey towards a healthier and happier relationship. Remember, it takes both partners’ commitment and willingness to make a couple’s counselling a success.

Let us assume a scenario, a couple sitting down at opposite ends of their sofa, and glaring at each other. Actually, this couple in their 40s had yet another fight. It is a continuation of something that started last night, but the reality was they had variations of the same row for the previous three years.

The complaints go on like “I have asked you to be kinder, but you speak to me with such contempt,” the husband says.

“But you are also doing things that upset me,” the wife counter-claimed. “What am I supposed to do?”

Shivani Sadhoo says, they are in gridlock and falling into three common mistakes made by couples with perpetual problems.

So what are these mistakes? Could knowing them transform your relationship? This is answered by India’s top marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

Mistake 1: “You change”

It is quite easy to have a long list of what your partner could do differently and a short list of your own. Probably yours is completely blank or full of hopeless ideas such as “give up.” Sadly, pointing out your partner’s shortcomings does not encourage change—merely defensiveness and counter-attack. Usually, it is encouraged that couples step into each other’s shoes and look at the world from there. However, once you reach gridlock, you are quite angry to make this leap of imagination.

Mistake 2: Protesting louder

If you cannot get through to your partner, you might wonder, why not raise the stakes? Probably they will finally understand and take you seriously. So, you shout louder, throw a bigger tantrum, or move from sniping to sarcasm and on to quite nasty name-calling. Other versions involve bringing in the opinions of other people to back you up and punishing your partner by refusing intimacy. Unfortunately, couples debate alternative narratives, forming a case against their partner.

Mistake 3: Flee and purse

At a certain point, one partner will check out. It might be walking away, internally shutting down, or people-pleasing (by which it means agreeing to anything for a quiet life but being filled with resentment or giving an empty apology to close down the argument). There are couples who simply beg their partners to stop. Not surprisingly, the other partner does not feel heard and fears nothing will ever transform. So they prevent the fleeing partner from leaving, following them to the next room or they rekindle the row a few moments later.

How to break the gridlock

Consider that both of you are correct. It is quite easy to fall into black-and-white concepts of right and wrong, win and defeat. Instead of this comparative approach, embrace something called contemplative thinking. In place of “yes but,” switch to “yes and,” which does not negate your spouse’s position. Once you accept that both are correct, you open up to creative solutions: “What can we do distinctly?”

Look deeper into the problem. Ask yourself, “What is this argument actually about?” If you both feel so strongly, it should be something important and that usually goes back to your childhood. So, tell each other what past trauma has been reactivated. If you require help with this, find a Gottman-trained therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo.

Stay in the cauldron of conflict longer. It is natural to look to exit conflict as equally as possible but it takes some time to go through. Do not put pressure on yourselves. It will generally take several discussions, perhaps, over several days. So learn to feel more comfortable having uncertainty and agree to keep talking.

Become vulnerable with each other. In place of showing your armored exterior, speak about what you find hard. Remember to use “I” statements. For instance: “I feel anxious” instead of “You make me feel anxious.”

Look for similarities and build on those. It is helpful to remind each one of what you agree on. For instance: “We both want the best for the children” or “We are both feeling quite overwhelmed.” If you address the better part of your spouse rather than attack their flaws, it is simpler to build cooperation.

Going through. Once you stop pushing your specific solution, another way will slowly arise. If you are still stuck, it might be that you need to return to the earlier steps and do some more talking and plenty of listening. When you both feel really understood, you will be ready to march forward.

The relationships with other people need to be healthy for mental and emotional wellbeing which is most important for our happiness and survival. Partners, are those who can support, communicate, listen, and encourage each other emotionally and practically have less stress in their relationship. And they are definitely having a healthier relationship.

Communication Problem

Every relationship has ups and downs whereas successful couples have learned, how to come out or manage any kind of difficult situation nicely. According to the blog by counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo, “The root cause of any relationship facing problem is due to poor communication.”

Some Surveys for Divorce

More than 37% of couples blame their partner for their marriage ending 6% blame themselves.

While 74% of couples reported that they work hard to keep their marriage protected.

Causes and Consequence

Majorly some of the reasons for relationship troubles between partners are money, lack of commitment, and communication issues.

Willing Couples Can Solve Their Disputes Easily

Thanks to Shivani Misri Sadhoo – who is India’s leading Marriage Counselor and Relationship Expert,  now you can avail her services regarding marital counseling online where she can help you to get your married life back on track, solve disputes and family issues, in a constructive manner.

Does Online Couples Counseling Work?

Research and studies indicate that couples who engage in online relationship counselling with a qualified therapist see an improvement in their overall relationships. All couples go through torrid patches, but when the tough times fail to improve, certain things can aid the partners to get back on the same page. In fact, it can be more effective when one compares it with in-person or face-to-face counselling because it lets the counselor notice how you are behaving with your partner while at home when compared to an office-based counseling session.

What Can One Expect in Online Couples Counseling?

During the starting sessions of counselling, you will meet with your therapist online. You won’t have to jump into the problems that you as a couple are having. First, the marriage counselor will get to know each of you. They will find out your individual personalities and how you come together as a couple.

Before understanding the difficulties that you two are having, the couples counsellor requires an understanding of who you are and what you bring to this relationship. Post an initial couple of sessions, your couples counsellor will discuss the admissible issues in your relationship. Then your therapist will figure out a plan as to how to navigate through the roadblocks.

Advantages of Online Couple Therapy

·         It is more affordable for couples where it saves your time and gives you privacy.

·         Very comfortable for group sessions.

·         Easily Accessible.

·         It is most useful for long-distance partners.

·         Get your documents online.

More Features

At the time of online sessions of counseling, all the records for the therapy remains confidential and secured. No one can see or access your documents or things that you have discussed if you want. It keeps your identity completely safe.

What to Expect in an Online Couples Therapy:

Most of couples are seeking for marriage counseling and therapists to resolve their major issues and to understand the cause of their conflict in the family.

·         Get to the root of the problems.

·         Develop goals and a timeline.

·         Learn new skills to improve relationships.

·         Homework outside of sessions.

·         Limit your weakness or vulnerability.

·         Work with a qualified couples counselor.

Other Benefits of Online Couple Counseling

·         A qualified counselor’s advice.

·         Structural planning to achieve goals.

·         Learn the techniques to improve the relationship.

Your Counselor Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control COVID-19 spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of coronavirus, we hope to offer our therapeutic help. Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high. 

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option. Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service! 

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.

According to Marriage and Family Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo

In this time of pandemic going or meeting someone is a big challenge. Specifically, when there is a constant threat of getting infected from COVID-19. But, in spite of this life goes on and the certain things that used to bother you on pre-COVID days they still bother you and relationship issues between a husband and wife is one such thing.

This pandemic has seen a lot of changes and marriage counseling is no different either. Marriage counseling from the traditional face to face counseling has got another alternative and that is Online Marriage Counseling. The dynamics remain the same but only the mode of marriage counseling has changed.

Eminent Marriage Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo says if you and your partner have been contemplating couples therapy, then you are in good company. Almost all couples can stand to benefit from online counseling. Online couples therapy can assist couples understand their relationship patterns, dysfunctional coping technic, communication issues, and personality differences. Unlike what most people assume that online marriage counseling, will not work the same way as a face to face counseling or is not just for those who are struggling with problems in their relationship. Then this is a wrong notion to carry around as online couples therapy is equally effective and useful.

Thought you cannot meet physically with a couple’s therapist during this time, you can book online couples therapy appointments, also known as teletherapy. As long as your therapist makes sure that the sessions are confidential and that all precautions are taken for the client’s protection, both video, and home sessions can be equally effective as in-person sessions. Clients are given tools and homework assignments to support them navigate through their process and, if done properly, there should be no hindrances to the client’s progress during this time

In this blog, India’s leading Marriage Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo broadly tells about the benefits, you can avail from online marriage counseling.

Here they are.

The Home Advantage

Every online couple therapist knows how helpful it can be for a client’s remedy when they perform a visit, which usually, takes place in the client’s home rather than the therapist’s office. As a counselor, it gives an opportunity to really get a deeper glance at what things are like in the household.  With teletherapy, you are already home. “In their own home environment, couples tend to show more transparency to the therapist.

With online couples’ therapy, this process is fast-tracked because the clients are already present in the comforts of their home where they will do most of their practice.

Without Feeling Exposed, You Get an Exposure to the Therapy

Perhaps the thought of going into a marriage counselors’ office makes you uncomfortable. It is perfectly OK! Online marital therapy removes this hurdle while still giving you useful tactics to improve your relationship. Couples who are afraid of getting exposed to therapy through a screen is a great alternative to the therapeutic process.

Able to Have a Stronger Emotional Bond

It is not comfortable for most people to open up and feel vulnerable, even with their own partner. But when the fundamental love or attachment bond is strong between partners, they are more adaptable of weathering storms together. Methods such as Emotionally Focused Therapy can help couples to understand each other’s attachment patterns and triggers so they can better understand each other and see their negative pattern as the enemy and not the individual. Then, they can be vulnerable with each other and connect in confidently rather than attacking or ridiculing each other and destroying the bond.

Learn to Communicate More Effectively

One of the finest useful tools, you will learn in both online and face to face couples therapy is how to understand your partner well and how to get your partner to understand and know you better. The best method to do this is through verbal communication. Plenty of conflicts begins when one partner says, “You are so insensitive and mean!’ which makes the other partner put up his/her defenses for safety. A helpful approach that is mostly recommended is to practice interchanging ‘you’ statements with ‘I’ statements, or telling the partner how you are feeling rather than telling them how they are behaving.

You Learn to Set the Boundaries

Probabilities are, you are not accustomed to spending every waking second with your partner, but this is likely become your reality provided the stay-at-home orders. It can be comfortable to feel on the defense with your partner, who could be getting on your last nerve at this stage. Online couples therapy can assist ease the tension by letting you know how to set boundaries and maintain a healthy balance of harmony, unity, and separateness. Boundaries can aid couples to avoid codependency and maintain respect for each other and the overall relationship.

Your Counselor Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control COVID-19 spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of coronavirus, we hope to offer our therapeutic help.  Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high. 

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option.  Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service! 

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.

Do you usually feel tired after waking up and frequently miss quality sleep? Even though you are not using gadgets in your bed and lately, consume less caffeine at night, and generally go to your bed on time. Then it’s time you take a careful look at your bedroom, as Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo suggests that your bedroom condition can impact your sleep quality due in these many ways: –

Avoid Clutter

A cloth-stand with laundry clothes in your bedroom, toys spread on your dressing table, a corner tool covered with few cloths – has the potential to affect your sleep quality. Yes, the research has identified that clutter in your bedroom can subconsciously increase your stress and anxiety, and a cleaner, more organized room tends to create a sense of peace.

Be careful with wall colours 

We generally perceive wall colours have a universal impact on an individual’s moods but that’s not always true. Every person can react differently to a different colour, for example, shades of blue are often considered the most calming and peaceful for wall colour but some people find blue to be sad instead of tranquil. Thus, evaluate your bedroom wall colours, and try different colours.

Sneaky light

Darkness is an important tool to help activate melatonin (a hormone that helps the body feel sleepy). Any kind of light source can suppress this hormone and can make you feel more alert. Hence your bedroom may be hiding your sleep culprit in the form of the thinner window curtain, glowing LED clock, or the charging light from your laptop charger.

Your Counselor Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control COVID-10 spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of coronavirus, we hope to offer our therapeutic help.  Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high. 

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option.  Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service! 

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.

Marriage is a lifelong commitment. Sometimes remaining happy in a relationship can be tricky but with a trust that has developed over the years remaining happy is not that difficult at all. After all love, trust and compatibility play a big role in being happy as a couple.

Though there are no secrets or formulas for remaining happily married there are certain things that can ensure a merry time for the couples. And definitely some habits before going to sleep are some of those.

In this article, Delhi’s Best Marriage Counselor, Relationship Expert, and Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares things happily married couples do before going to sleep.

They Go To Bed At The Same Time

Keep in mind that, a couple that sleeps together remains together. Thanks to your busy schedules, you hardly get time to spend with each other. In fact, a few couples, who have a different working schedule, may even go to bed at different times. However, it is important for couples to go to sleep at the same time, which helps them to keep intact the warmth and intimacy in their relationship.

They Do Not Attend To Phone Calls Or Texts

Smartphones are both a blessing and a curse in your life. Your overdependency on your phones, particularly social media, can affect your lives and those around you. This is the reason why several couples who enjoy a happy marital life, keep their phone on silent or attend to calls only when it is a real urgency after they go to bed.

They Do Not Bring Their Work To The Bedroom

If you are somebody who continuously thinks about office work on your laptop or phone even minutes while going to bed, you need to alter this habit as quickly as you can. People who think about work past bedtime is less possible to have a happily married life.

They Do Not Go To Bed Angry

This is one trait that happily married couples are seen doing. They seldom go to bed angry. Even if they had a fight or an argument, they make it sure to resolve it. Harboring negative emotions while going to sleep not only impacts your health but also affects your peace of mind in a negative manner.

Keeps Their Bedroom Clutter And Gadget Free

The bedroom is the only place where a couple gets the chance to spend time with each other without any disturbances. This is the sole reason why married couples keep their bedroom clutter and gadget-free ends up spending some quality time in each other’s company.

A few women feel a real man do not exist, that he is impossible to get. Some women do not want somebody like him. On the other hand, many men think they are the best definition of a real man.

While some men feel there is no such thing. One thing is sure, though, those men who think they are the actual definition of a real man and those who believe they are not very often wrong.

If you want to know that you are a real man or are in a relationship with a real man, look out the actions. A real man behaves very differently from the selfish boy types you get to everywhere that you cannot fail to notice the difference.

He is a complete gentleman, good for more than just the first initial months. Essentially, a real man does things so nicely when he is into a relationship that one just has to love him and his style.

Delhi’s Top Marriage Counsellor and Relationship Expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this article talks about the things a real man does when he is into a relationship.

He Loves And Respects His Woman For What She Is

He may not love her all the time, but he loves her. Not only her body, her possessions, and her status, but entre of her. He knows that as beautiful as her body is at present, physical beauty fades. Thus, he focuses his love and attention on her true beauty, which is found inside her sensibilities and personality. He treats her like a lady, with great dignity and respect. He never minds cooking her favorite food, taking her out to dinner and paying the bills. He also expects love and respect from her.

Commits To The Relationship Completely

He never cheats. He is loyal to his partner and understands that relationships take hard work to keep it strong and healthy. His affection for his woman is a full-time commitment. He nourishes and boosts the relationship through ongoing, honest interaction and teamwork. When you are with a real man, you know you can trust the man. He will stay faithful does not matter what and expects you to do the same.

Protects His Woman Physically And Emotionally

It is not that a woman cannot protect and defend herself, but he is there for her anyways. He protects her in several ways, including providing financial security and comforting her and making her feel that things will be okay. He is ready to throw a good punch if required to defend her from physical aggressors. However, he thinks before he acts. He never makes a move until he is sure about all details and specifics are in order. His moves are analytic, deliberate and certain. Relationship violence of any kind is not an issue when you are with him. He is considerate and treats everybody kindly.

He Fulfils His Partner Mentally And Sexually

He knows that most of the time in any relationship is spent doing non-physical, non-sexual things. Apart from whispering to her how beautiful she is or how he is going to make passionate love to her when he gets back home during the evening, he also engages his partner in meaningful discussions about life plan with her, and cracks joke to ease up and liven moments together. He shows awareness, intelligence, and sensitivity that makes his acts not only timely but also genuinely charming.

He Takes Responsibility For Each Actions And Decisions

He does not put blame on his partner or try to defend his mistakes. He acknowledges when he has committed a mistake apologizes for it, learns from it and acts to make it right. Apologizing is not an issue with him. He knows it does not make him any less of himself to say it. In fact, apologizing makes him more of a man because it shows he has the confidence, courage, and integrity to admit his faults and looks to correct them.

He Always Speaks His Mind

He is not afraid or worried to say what is on his mind. He will say no without any fear whenever he does not agree with something. He will debate with you on topics he is not comfortable with without losing his temper. He will be honest and talk to you like an equal, then allow you to have your own conclusions or take whatever action you may want. This does not mean he is indifferent or treats his partner badly. He simply does not agree with her on everything. He understands a Yes-man is no man at all.

He Stands Up For His Relationship

At times friends, family and even strangers ask inappropriate things or make improper remarks about your relationship, like saying you are not a good couple. In those cases, a real man stands up for himself and his partner and defends the legitimacy and integrity of the relationship. Even when they are his peers, he speaks up and stands his ground to protect his relationship. This says he can express himself in the presence of others, protect his woman and act as an authoritative man.

Being in a toxic relationship is not never an easy task. Most of you want to get out of toxic work life, friendships and also relationships. However, when it comes to relationships, one needs to understand if the habits are really toxic.

Plenty of times you end up objectifying common habits and tendencies as toxic when in actuality they are not. After all, no relationship is perfect and at times all it needs is some time and reflection. While most of you want things to be scenic and romantic all the time, which in reality is not practical to attain.

Top Marriage Counselor, Relationship Expert and Founder of Saarthi Counselling Services Shivani Misri Sadhoo talks about the healthy relationship habits, that the majority of people actually think they are toxic.

Hurting Feelings Of Each Other

Sometimes, you and your partner can hurt the feelings of each other. There are times when you have to tell your partner the fact, they do not want to hear. Rather than having a fake and pretentious relationship, it is vital, to be honest. If your partner provides you his/her honest opinion, it is fine to be hurt, but it is normal for the partner to maintain transparency.

Not Accepting The Flaws

The reality of every relationship is that nobody is perfect. Every individual has flaws and imperfections, the faster you accept, the better it is. If your partner accepts you with every flaw of yours, even you should too. Overlooking a few shortcomings can bring you two closer than ever.

Avoiding Conflicts

A majority of people want to avoid arguments, which is normal and fine. You need to understand that everything cannot be resolved by talking. Some conflicts simply happen and cannot be resolved. It is fine to ignore a few conflicts, instead of arguing and hurting each other anymore. As there is a saying, some battles are not worth fighting. All you require to understand is it worth fighting or not?

Taking Some Place

In this busy life, you cannot just focus on your partner. Everyone needs some time off even from a relationship. You cannot always be the escape zone for your better half. Sometimes, spending time apart is good, which will only make your relationship stronger in the future. If you or your partner wants to spend some time away, then it is fine. From old hobbies on a trip with your friends, spending some time away from your partner can help to bring back the spark.

Feeling Attracted To Someone Else

As much as you would like to believe that you can have attraction only for your significant one, human chemistry says otherwise. It is okay to find other people attractive, as it is biologically unavoidable. Once you get past the honeymoon phase, it is fine to feel attracted to each other. Liking someone is unavoidable and to act on it is your choice and conscience always.

Marriage is a crucial stage in every individual’s life, it can be an exciting and enjoyable moment when you tie the knot with the right person. Else, it can be emotionally draining and physically stirring. Contrary to the fairy tale idea of weddings you grow up fantasizing, marriages in real life can be tricky and challenging.

Once you are through the honeymoon phase, only then you may face some uneasy situations that may force you to contemplate whether you have married the right person or not. Although there is no easy analysis assuring a compatible life partner.

In this article, Delhi’s eminent Marriage Counsellor, Relationship Expert, and Founder of Saarthi Counselling Services Shivani Misri Sadhoo says the following factors while selecting a partner can be of great help. Here they are.

Values Matches

Though sharing the same love for a hobby or a passion for traveling can enhance your relationship, what really matters in a marriage is having some shared values. It means both must have similar socio-cultural, political beliefs, same value system to name a few. The fact that you need the same thing from life is a symptom that you believe in the same core values and are meant to be with each other. As you grow and evolve, your interests keep changing but the values that you hold do not change much if strongly held. Irrespective of your interests, shared values have a nice chance for a successful marriage. You do not have to agree on everything but if your values are out of line, you could need to reconsider the prospect of marriage.

Have Strong Trust

Trust lays the foundation of every relationship. When you trust your significant other, you have that freedom to be yourself, to share your thoughts and heart with your partner because you know what you share will always be valued and treasured. You can be honest about things without the requirement to hide them and that is a good sign. Without trust, you will feel fear and insecurities, hampering the potential of the relationship. It is, therefore, quintessential to know that the person you are going to marry is trustworthy prior you share your deepest feelings and experiences.

Healthy Level Of Independence

While you enjoy spending time with each other, your would-be spouse should have no issue with you spending time with other people or doing the things you enjoy. In a healthy relationship, both partners understand and respect that their partner needs time besides doing what they want to do. If someone is continuously relying on you for all their needs and demands then understand there is some problem down the line. Co-dependence on each other to an extent that you lose your autonomy is a bad sign. A self-assured person is confident and can take care of his/her own emotional needs.

Relationship Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares Some Small Gestures That Can Enhance Your Relationship

At times, falling in love and being in a relationship may seem easy in the beginning. But maintaining a relationship and sailing through all the rough water is a challenge that the majority of the couples face. Is there any magic formula that may help you make your relationship grow stronger? There are not really, but surely some gestures and acts can bring two individuals closer. In fact, the accumulation of small gestures has a greater impact on the happiness of the couple than big but less frequent gestures.

Shivani Misri Sadhoo who is a top Marriage Counsellor, Relationship Expert and Founder of Saarthi Counselling Services talks about some of the small gestures that can enhance your relationship if you are going through a rough phase in your love life. Here, are some of them.

Compliment Your Partner, Genuinely

Compliments are a good way of letting your partner know that you still find him/her attractive. Sometimes, when you are with the same person for a significant time, you begin taking their efforts for granted. Why bury your love under the weight of your hectic schedule? Appreciate their efforts and achievements that you feel deserve recognition and compliment.

These small gestures are a strong way of showing that you are paying attention that will make them feel more valued.

Plan A Small Surprise

Spending months and years in a relationship, you become so comfortable in your own ways that you do not bother to express your love to the significant one. It does not imply that you do not love them anymore, it is a sign of stability. But should you allow the sparks to fly away by keeping it monotonous? At times, when words fall short to thank their presence in life, why not plan for small surprises? While spending lavishly is not necessary, surprise your partner with a gift or simply take them to a movie or dinner date. A small surprise will not only brighten their mood but will make them feel more loved.

Do A Random Act Of Kindness

Small gestures can make your partner really feel happy. Holding hands, preparing their favorite dish, assisting them to schedule an appointment or picking them up from the office are all small gestures of showing how deeply invested you are in this relationship. These are also a small indication that there is someone in the corner who pays attention to their daily needs.

Spend Good Time Together

Spending some worthy time together is a healthy way of keeping the spark alive in a relationship. Good time with your partner can be as easy as making an attempt to remain involved in each other’s lives, be it a walk, weekend drive or normal conversation about each other’s dreams and aspirations. As long as you can feel good around each other and give undivided attention to your significant one in things you do, it will be quality and a good time.

Reassurance

Everybody loves to be adored and a bit of reassurance is like an icing on the cake. You may think that your partner already knows how much you love him/her, but a reminder that you will always have their back will uplift their mood and make your bond even stronger. Letting your partner know how much you love them is always a good idea of showing your affection.