Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

Marriage Counselor and Relationship Expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares some amazing tips for couples to nurture their relationship as parents

A baby brings boundless joy to new parents, for within their tiny form lies the miracle of life. While the demands of parenthood may challenge their time and energy, the flame of love between mom and dad can still persist.

Balancing the demands of parenthood and maintaining a strong connection with your partner requires effort and understanding. In this article, India’s top marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo offers some tips and tricks for nurturing your relationship as a new parent.

What are those ways to nurture your relationship as a parent?

Here, Shivani Sadhoo shares some of the methods, that could make your transition to parenthood a smooth ride.

Why Communicate with Compassion?

Effective communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship. As new parents, take time to listen to each other’s concerns, fears, and joys. Be mindful of your partner’s emotional needs and offer support and encouragement.

Choose your words carefully, speaking kindly and respectfully, even when fatigue and stress take hold. Remember, open and honest communication will help you navigate the challenges together and deepen your bond. When your baby cries, you’re compassionate. Extend that to your partner. Relationships change after a baby, but growth happens when you change together.

Do it together as a team

Parenthood is a team sport, and collaboration between partners is vital. Share the responsibilities of childcare and household chores, support each other’s needs, and find a balance that works for both of you. Recognize and appreciate each other’s contributions, acknowledging the value of teamwork in creating a harmonious environment for your family.

Nurture intimacy

After having a baby, physical and emotional intimacy can be neglected. Yet, it’s vital to prioritize a romantic connection. Make time for intimate moments like cuddling, date nights, or heartfelt conversations. Small gestures and expressions of love foster a strong bond.

Take care of yourself

Remember to take care of yourself amidst the demands of parenthood. It’s essential to nurture your own well-being, as it directly impacts your relationship with your partner. Prioritize self-care activities such as exercise, meditation, or pursuing hobbies that bring you joy. By taking care of yourself, you’ll have more energy and positivity to invest in your partnership.

Express appreciation

Show gratitude for each other’s efforts and support. Recognize and acknowledge the hard work and dedication that goes into being a parent. Small gestures of appreciation can go a long way in fostering a positive and nurturing environment.

The Power of Giving Space

Granting each other space as new parents fosters personal growth and maintains individuality. It involves recognizing the importance of alone time, pursuing hobbies, and nurturing friendships outside of parenthood, strengthening the partnership.

Conflict management

Managing conflicts effectively is crucial in any relationship, and this becomes even more challenging when you have a newborn due to the added stress and exhaustion. Use “I” statements to express how you feel, such as “I feel overwhelmed when…” or “I need support with…”. This can help avoid blaming and encourage understanding.

Seek Support

New parents often feel overwhelmed. Seek support from family, friends, or professionals. Connect with experienced parents, join groups, or consider couples counseling. Asking for help lightens the load and strengthens relationships.

Embrace Imperfections

Parenthood is a journey of constant learning and growth. Embrace the imperfections and understand that mistakes are inevitable. Be patient and forgiving with yourself and your partner. Celebrate the small victories, and remember that every day presents an opportunity to strengthen your bond and create beautiful memories together.

As you embark on the incredible journey of parenthood, remember that nurturing your relationship is just as important as caring for your little one. Enjoy this remarkable chapter of your lives, cherishing the moments of joy, and growing stronger as a couple with each passing day. And if you need any help, we are there to guide you. 

In the hustle and bustle of our fast-paced lives, it’s all too easy for the flames of romance to flicker and fade. The demands of work, family, and personal commitments often leave little time and energy for nurturing our relationships. However, building a healthy and vibrant connection with your partner is crucial for both your individual well-being and the longevity of your relationship.

So, if you find yourself in a situation where your partner’s busyness has caused a strain, fear not! In this article, we will explore creative and effective ways to reconnect and rejuvenate your relationship with your busy partner. India’s eminent marriage counselor, Shivani Misri Sadhoo is here to guide you.

1. Open Communication:

The foundation of any successful relationship lies in open and honest communication. Set aside dedicated time each day to engage in meaningful conversations with your partner. Create an atmosphere of trust where both of you can openly express your thoughts, concerns, and dreams. Effective communication builds understanding and empathy, fostering a deeper connection between partners.

2. Quality over Quantity:

While it may be challenging to find large blocks of time together, focus on the quality of the time you do have. Plan activities or outings that both partners enjoy and that allow for meaningful connection. It could be as simple as a romantic dinner at home, a walk in the park, or a weekend getaway. By maximizing the quality of your time spent together, you can create cherished memories and rekindle the spark in your relationship.

3. Surprise Gestures: 

Small, thoughtful gestures can go a long way in rekindling the spark in your relationship. Surprise your partner with their favorite meal, leave a heartfelt note in their briefcase or purse, or plan a surprise outing that aligns with their interests. These simple acts demonstrate your love and appreciation, creating moments of delight and reinforcing the emotional bond between you. Use technology for good. Sending text messages to your partner is a wonderful way to maintain a connection, share small moments, and show you care.

4. Support and Understanding: 

Acknowledge and validate the challenges your partner faces due to their busy schedule. Show genuine interest in their work and offer support whenever possible. By demonstrating understanding and empathy, you build a strong foundation of trust and solidarity. Your partner will feel valued and cherished, fostering a sense of belonging within the relationship.

5. Shared Hobbies and Interests: 

Finding common ground and engaging in shared hobbies can infuse new energy into your relationship. Discover activities that you both enjoy and make time for them regularly. Whether it’s cooking, dancing, hiking, or painting, the shared experiences will create lasting memories and deepen your bond.

6. Save the date: 

Intentionally carve out time in both of your calendars for regular date nights. This dedicated time allows you to focus solely on each other, away from the distractions of work and daily responsibilities. Whether it’s a candlelit dinner, a movie night, or a cozy evening, make it a habit to schedule these dates to strengthen the bond and keep the romance alive.

7. Tender Touch: 

Physical intimacy is an integral part of any romantic relationship. Find moments to express affection, even amidst busy schedules. A warm hug, a gentle touch, or a passionate kiss can communicate love and desire. Prioritize intimacy and make it a regular part of your routine, reigniting the passion and desire within your relationship.

So, take the first step today, and embark on a path toward reconnecting and rejuvenating your relationship with your busy partner. Together, you can create a love that withstands the tests of time and nourishes your soul for a lifetime.

The role of power plays a crucial role in any relationship. When one specific partner enjoys too much power it often creates disharmony, imbalance and often becomes the sole cause of the relationship to crumble. Shivani says, in any marital relationship maintaining the balance in power dynamics helps it to navigate smoothly.

No relationship can blossom when one partner enjoys the power and the other one has little or no say virtually.

India’s top marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo says times are changing and so do the dynamics of power in your relationship. One who better understands this aspect of balancing power in a relationship stands a higher probability to reap the goods from their relationship.

Here are the things that may help you.

Share power

It is pre-eminent to realize that real empowerment of both partners makes for a happier, healthier family. Learn to balance and divide the power and distribute duties amongst yourselves so that none of you feel stressed or burdened. This needs a mindset shift.

Balance goals both individual and family

Both the partners in a marriage need to honor common goals related to the family and respect individual dreams as well. This lessens the major portion of the load on the husband for the finances and a major portion of the load on the wife for caregiving or in other cases, or vice versa.

Try to influence not impose

Imposing your will and views and one-way communication never help in any relationship. It often leads to a deadlock and damaged egos. The skill of positive impact using listening and questioning is more vital than merely demanding or imposing your views. Honest open communication will assist in solutions when both parties feel empowered and respected.

There may always be a soft balance of power in a husband-wife relationship but to make a long-lasting relationship work, both partners require to feel empowered enough to share their power.

For any relationship to last long, the balancing act of power amongst the partners often decides which way the relationship will march on. If you feel that maintaining the balance in power often creates a rift in your relationship. It is better to introspect that and try to include the above-said things to see the positive changes in your relationship.

Do you remember when you first met your special one? It might have been one of those fairy-tale moments.

Everything surrounding you faded into the background and the one thing that existed was them. You gathered up the courage to introduce yourself and your relationship was created

Or it might have been a simple friendship that eventually transformed into a romance.

Regardless of how it started, married life is totally contrasting to dating.

And nothing can truly prepare you for marriage.

Marriage could be the most difficult aspect in your life – it could also be the finest thing in your life – likely both too.

Shivani Sadhoo says perhaps it is designed that way only.

Marriage is designed to grow two individuals up into better humans. Marriage is not about just being happy, it is about growing.

Keeping this in mind India’s top marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares a few simple points to consider that may help make your marriage better, regardless of how it started.

Even though there is no magical formula for a marriage to work, still certain factors help it to grow. Let us take a look at those factors which are basically the 4 C’s.

Chemistry

There has to be some kind of connection between the two individuals. Similar interests, aims, dreams, etc. While this is not mandatory, it does lay a foundation for several things in marriage, like travel, hobbies, vacations, and outside commitments both individually and together. Take heart and know that if you did not have chemistry, the relationship will be short-lived – so those of you who think or feel you now have nothing in common with your special one after several years of marriage, look and think again because it is probably there.

Communication

Here is another small but important secret for marriage, communication happens every time. In fact, you cannot go without communicating. Everything you say and even don’t say communicates something. Every act you do or don’t do says something too. Communication issues in marriage don’t happen because you cannot communicate, they occur because you do not like the message. In an attempt to master this arena of marriage changes your focus to learning ways to handle the message.

Comedy

Humor is a wonderful reparative aspect of marriage, as well as a fantastic connector. Having the ability to laugh with your loved one, whether this laughter is regarding something external or just about yourself and your relationship, laughter truly is good medicine. Often couples may get bored in a long relationship because of monotonous ways of living life. This is where having a little ingredient of humor in your marital life could often add a spark and color to it.

Commitment

A vital ingredient to any marriage is commitment. Without this, it falls apart. Incidentally, wish to know the secret to a long-lasting marriage? Two individuals who opt to stay married. That is it. Make the decision to stick out through the torrid and rough spots. Often some people say “my marriage is not worth fighting for.” The truth perhaps is they haven’t fought for it. Something is only worth fighting for the post you have fought for it.” Truer words are rarely spoken.

When you are aware of the 4 C’s in marriage, you potentially stand a better chance to have a long and satisfying relationship with your spouse.

Your Therapist Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control the pandemic’s spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of coronavirus, we hope to offer our therapeutic help. Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high.

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option. Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service!

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.

One of the oldest and biggest mantras to a healthy and lasting relationship is trust. It is a fragile yet powerful adhesive that holds two people together. It certainly is hard and at times a complex task to develop trust when you are beginning out in a relationship. But it is not so much of an arduous challenge once both the entities in a relationship are in it together says Shivani Sadhoo.

Here India’s eminent relationship counselor and couple’s therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares some effective tips that will assist you to form trust, feel loved, respected, secure, and content in your relationship.

·       Understand the causes why you two are together and make certain the reasons are right. Develop a framework around your relationship first.

·       If you love somebody, you have to respect them. The more respect you form between the two of you, the greater the love is. Define things that makes you feel disrespected and agree not to use that as a ploy in your relationship.

·       Do not expect the sort of romance that is shown in movies. Have realistic expectations related to your relationship and romance. You need to know that true romance is an outcome of respect, trust, and freedom of expression.

·       Always express what you feel like. If you are too worried or scared to speak out, it will simply make it difficult for you in the future. Make certain you let it all out of your system for the benefit of your relationship.

·       Providing each other space is equally vital as spending quality time with each other. Both of you must enjoy a space where you do things individually that makes you happy.

·       Changes are inevitable. You fall in love with a person’s mind and the person you fell in love with is bound to change with time. You need to expect and accept it. It is basic human nature to change, so do not let it get in your way.

Your Therapist Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control the pandemic’s spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of pandemic, we hope to offer our therapeutic help. Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high.

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option. Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service!

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.

What Does It Mean To Be Emotionally Safe In A Relationship, Says Shivani Sadhoo?

We all have seen in movies, or read love stories, where the protagonists say that love is everything to survive with their lover. Is it actually, everything? Is it truly possible to love someone but not feel emotionally connected? Do you have a desire to connect? But your (deep yearnings keep making you frustrated without knowing the reason).

Wistfully, there is mostly a gap between the love you feel in your heart and the emotional intimacy you experience with someone. Shivani Sadhoo says the connection one desires may seem so close, so they keep trying, yet it might remain sadly elusive. It is maddening when you love a person but do not experience the trust and safety that is paramount for the relationship to thrive. This emotional safety is a vital foundation for an intimate relationship.

This blog by Couples Therapist and Relationship Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo sheds some light on reasons when love is not enough for your relationship to thrive. Read on to know why?

Components of an Emotional Safety

When you feel emotionally safe, you feel internally relaxed with a person. Your guard is down and your shields do not go up when you interact. You feel truly free to be authentic, which includes expressing your hurts, dissatisfactions, and desires without worrying or fearing that you will be criticized or shamed.

As per John Gottman’s research on marital success, one out of the four factors that lead to disturbed relationships is defensiveness (besides criticism, contempt, and stonewalling). You defend yourself against the painful feelings that may pierce your heart if you are blamed, judged, shamed, and even rejected. Maintaining this invisible wall turns into a barrier that does not let your heart remain soft and open.

There are multiple possible manners to protect yourself when you do not feel safe. You may shield yourself by shutting down and remaining distant; you may minimize contact with your partner or friend. Or you might become critical of others before they have an opportunity to criticize you. Or you defensively turn the tables on them when they show any dissatisfaction with you. (For instance, “well you are not a good listener either” or “you are the one who always forgets not me”).

When you feel safe with a person, you do not have to be defensive since there is little to defend against. When you feel constantly treated with respect and kindness, you can relax internally with a partner. As you trust that your partner or even a friend has the intention and ability to see who you truly are—to hear and understand you, even if they might fall short a few times—you relax more and more with them, which boosts the trust and forms intimacy.

Forming a trusting, non-defensive relationship needs that you provide to another what you desire. Love demands reciprocal sharing—extending yourself toward another’s world in a manner that lets the other one feel emotionally safe with you. Enjoying the wonderful dance of intimacy—the aisle of “undefended love,” the way Jett Paris and Marlena Lyon say it: requires two self-aware, undefended individuals who are emotionally honest with themselves and each other.

Being Yourself and Being Truthful

One of the blessings of forming safety in a relationship is that you feel free to be yourself. If you have been hurt in the past, you may have vowed to never be so trusting and open again. Your heart might flash the signal: “not available for love and to be loved.”

Life is richer when you find a partner with whom to enjoy the special bond that comes from being yourself and feeling accepted as you are. As two people feel secure to be vulnerable with each other—showing tender feelings and desires without the worrying of criticism or rejection—the connection enhances.

Emotional safety also needs telling the truth and keeping agreements. You cannot feel safe with an individual who is deceiving you or when their actions are not in line with their words. Authentic, open, trustworthy communication is the life energy of an intimate relationship.

Certainly, nobody is perfect, and it is much simple to perceive others’ imperfections than to see your own. It is inevitable that sometimes trust will be broken, even in the best of relationships. But emotional safety is something that can be restored if two individuals can find the courage and is determined to address the breach through open, non-defensive communication.

There are specific issues in your marriage that cannot be changed today. No matter how well you try, some marriage improvements take time.  But the given choices shared in this blog by India’s eminent marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo with you today will immediately improve your marriage.

Couples Therapist Shivani says it has been seen these four things change your marriage for the good and the absence of these things could change your marriage for the bad. It would be wise to choose all of them, if possible. But even opting for trying for just one could be a game-changer.

Presume the Best for your Partner

Several couples often spend years being defensive with one another. One of the partners would ask a question and the other one would be defensive. And, vice versa. Being defensive is never going to build intimacy. When you presume the worst of your spouse, you automatically place them in defense mode. In defense mode, responsibility is not taken, grace is never shown, patience runs dry and arguments are frequent. When you presume the best of your wife or your husband, there is a confidence that even while you disagree, you know in your heart deeply that your spouse is for you. When you have confidence that your partner is for you, intense discussions help build intimacy instead of shredding it. Presume the best and be proven wrong.

Speak Less and Listen More

Some individuals are control freaks. Control freaks have to be correct and have to have the last word. Because one always trying to prove he/she was right and always trying to have the last word, one would listen but just to have a response or counterpoint. Sounds similar? Do you interrupt your partner when he/she is talking? Do you find yourself thinking of a response in your mind as your spouse is speaking? Do you not even acknowledge what has been said prior to you proving how right you are? Your marriage will change today if you listened to your loved one in order to understand, rather than to be understood. Scripture says it like this, everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slower to become angry.

Stop Attempting to Change your Spouse

Many times couples often wish if they could have back the amount of time, energy, and emotions that they spent believing that we could change the other. One often thought if they yelled loud enough, made their point strong enough, were right enough, slammed the door hard enough, they would change. It never works. When one assumes the responsibility to change the heart of their spouse, they assume the role of God or nature in their marriage.  One may say can I just set you releases from something. Understand you do not have the power to change a human heart; only nature does. The best advice that can be given is, that will transform your marriage is to pray simply for your spouse and ask if it can change you.

Do Not Put Your Partner Down in Public

Some partners have this habit. They did not even realize how often they did this until the separation. One such instance could be making fun of your partner in front of other people. It could be horrible for your partner. When you make fun of your spouse or insult your spouse in front of others what you convey is how insecure you are with yourself. Do you encourage your spouse up in front of others or simply rip them apart?  There is nothing that will destroy intimacy faster than putting your spouse down in front of others. On the contrary, there is nothing more fulfilling than having your spouse compliment you in front of your friends or your family. It could be a huge factor.

Your Counselor Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control the pandemic’s spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of coronavirus, we hope to offer our therapeutic help. Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high.

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option. Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service!

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.

As you see when the winters are about to end and summers are drawing closer that indicates a new season is about to begin. The advent of spring just before the summer brings with itself the leaves changing colors and flowers being bloomed. And all these changes bring a magnificent brilliance.

This change gives you the indication that it is part of life and often they bring with itself positive outcomes.

Similarly, change is definitely something that impacts how a couple relates to each other.

India’s Top Marriage Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog shares tips to help your relationship whether any changes may pop up along the way:

Understand that Changes will Occur

You begin your journey as a couple at one place in your lives and will hopefully continue together for the long. To do so, also, expect several twists and turns along the way, everyday stresses, big challenges, milestone events. In simple words, Life Change is always happening, so expect it will continue to show up in your relationship, as well. Embracing or accepting an open mindset that allows for change and being willing to adjust and adapt makes space for your relationship to evolve with it.

Accept that People Change, and that is Fine

For any given number of reasons, a person shifts, and changes. It is important to support who your partner is rather than hoping them to forever remain as you would like them to be. Appreciate and foster their unique, evolving needs and wishes. Sometimes, their changes are temporary (like in a demanding work situation) on other occasions, the shift could be permanent because of an urge to make a life transition. Irrespective of the cause, having your support will provide strength to the relationship.

Identify when Change Might Spell Trouble

At times when your partner acts strangely, or differently, it may mean something is bothering them. Not all individuals are able to easily express themselves verbally. If you observe over time that your partner is behaving in a manner that is out of the ordinary, show your concern in a caring manner. It is important that care and compassion be expressed so that the other partner feels safe enough to be honest if there is a crisis or a problem.

Let Change Happen for you

Even though one of the best things about being in a relationship is consistency. It has been seen that boredom can kill it. The remedy is to form novelty—change! But do not worry: If the two of you are not huge risk-takers, you do not have to go skydiving to achieve the target. By merely switching up the restaurant you visit or try a new activity together. Add some spice to your daily life.

Alter the Way you Handle Conflict

One of the major reasons couples get into conflicts is because they do the repeated “dance steps” every time, they keep repeating the same pattern of arguments over and over again. One of the finest ways to make a change is to step out from moments of conflict and see what patterns the two of you are repeating. Then re-create the situation to see where a shift in a separate direction could be possible. Being open to changing the patterns lets you have a different (and more loving) result.

Change is difficult for many people. However, when accepted, it can be quite empowering for your overall relationship.

Your Counselor Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home.

While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control COVID-19 spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of coronavirus, we hope to offer our therapeutic help. Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high.

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option. Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service!

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.

Emotional intimacy is an art, but it eventually becomes a method of being in a relationship. It would be better to describe emotional intimacy as the experience of being emotionally connected and in sync with your partners. It involves a level of openness and vulnerability from both individuals and increases the overall sense of closeness you feel with your partner in daily life. Without emotional intimacy, it can be difficult for couples to weather the storms of life together.

Emotional intimacy is ultimately that glue which holds a relationship together, post the initial excitement fizzles. Couples who are emotionally intimate are able to overcome conflict more easily because they understand each one better and is able to communicate their feelings to each other. Fortunately, there are ways to form emotional intimacy if you haven’t quite tapped into it yet. Firstly, you need to check in on your relationship.

In this article top Marriage Counselor in India Shivani Misri Sadhoo talks about signs that your relationship perhaps lacks emotional intimacy and connection.

You Feel Awkwardly Distant

Without any emotional intimacy, your relationship may have a distance to it that you cannot quite pinpoint, almost as if your partner’s real feelings are always at arms’ length.

This is a sign of a lack of emotional intimacy if you might not know the reason, but you’re feeling distant and isolated from your partner, or perhaps you aren’t talking as much or spending as much time together. This distance in relationships can mostly signal a lack of emotional intimacy, and a need to nourish and nurture the emotional bond that fuels togetherness and connection. Try asking your partner a few questions about the relationship, and see how things head from there.

None of you Talk about your Emotions

A lack of transparency is another huge sign that you and your partner have not laid a solid foundation of emotional intimacy yet in your relationship. You have to be able to talk about your feelings and emotions with each other. These things are difficult to talk about because they require that you practice being vulnerable and transparent. But when feelings and emotions do not get talked about, they mostly come out in different and more problematic manner. This can lead to a habit of arguing over minor things or even stonewalling each other.

Lacking the security and confidence to share your feelings or being afraid that your partner will invalidate your feelings is a sign that your relationship is perhaps lacking emotional intimacy. So start out small, opening up to your partner about your daily anxieties, and see how your partner responds.

Perhaps One of You Shares Lot More than the Other

If one of the partners shares more than the other, it could be hard to notice that emotional intimacy is lacking. It may simply seem like someone’s a good listener. But it often means that there is an imbalance.

This might be a sign that a partner does not feel safe or comfortable expressing themselves openly in the relationship; conversely, it might also mean a partner is not creating space for their partner to be open and vulnerable with them. So, whether you realize that you are opening up more, or not quite sufficient, bring up this issue with your partner. It could be possible to resolve on its own.

You Do Not Touch Much Outside the Bedroom

When it is about the physical touch, there actually is a clear parallel between emotional and physical intimacy. It simply might not be in the ways you think. It is not a good sign if when you and your partner are alone there is a very small physical connection such as sitting close, holding hands, those small manners one expresses emotional intimacy.

Comfortable physical closeness needs a degree of emotional closeness. Thus, your physical distance might actually be symbolic. Emotional intimacy is the base for physical intimacy. When you are emotionally connected, you are physically connected and it makes your physical connection all the way better. This means that, if you realize you do not touch much, the solution is not to simply start holding hands and nothing else. Like all other areas of emotional intimacy, it is a sign that you perhaps need to open up more as a couple.

You Do Not Ask Each Other for Advice

In a relationship, both the partners must be able to support each other no matter what. Sadly, that’s difficult to accomplish if neither of you are really asking the other for help when you need it. No one’s life must be dictated by their partner, but your relationship must be a place you can go for guidance. It is a sign you do not have emotional intimacy if you do not ask for each other’s opinion or advice. This may indicate that you are not emotionally secure enough in your relationship to ask for each other’s help. So, assess whether the problem is on your end or theirs, and look to open up about it when you feel you can.

Emotional intimacy is a sign of a good relationship, but lacking it does not mean you, as a couple, are destined to doom. With a brief hard work, you and your partner can pinpoint the areas where you need help, and begin to fix things from there. Whether it means going on more dates, having some heart-to-hearts, or heading to couples counseling, there are methods to protect a good thing. If it is meant to be, it will surely work out.

Your Counselor Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control COVID-19 spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of coronavirus, we hope to offer our therapeutic help. Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high.

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option. Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service!

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.

So, you have been seeing someone for a few months now (yes, that person you met perhaps on a dating site). You think (or more like you hope) they are not seeing anyone else. You know their favorite type of food, music, their father’s name, and may even have a toothbrush at their house. However, even though you are kind of in a relationship, there still has not been any talk of commitment or even exclusivity. Does this seem familiar? Well, if this sounds like it is describing your relationship perfectly, then you are perhaps in a “situationship”.

Relationship Counselor Shivani says ss the latest relationship trend on the block, a situationship is actually when you and another person are doing things that normal couples do, but you are not actually a couple. In between a hook-up and a relationship, situationship is that in-between grey zone where no one truly knows what is going on. Situationships may last months or even years in several cases but, given the reality, they involve catching feelings, it will finally end in two methods. Either you are going to DTR (define the relationship) or someone decides to move on.

So, if you see yourself relating to these signs, as said by Delhi’s top Marriage Counselor and Relationship Expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog, then have a peek into it, that you may be in a “situationship”.

Run-Ins with a Friend or Relatives are Awkward

Have you ever bumped into a relative or friend while you are with the person you are seeing and not known what to introduce them as?  With responses with pauses like Uhm, this is my friend?’ or ‘Uh, this is his/her name, you know you are in a situationship. This is due to the fact that you haven’t truly defined what you are both doing.

Not at All Making Future Plans with Each Other

The majority of the people in committed relationships will be making plans for their future, such as birthday plans or deciding to book event tickets that would not be for another six to eight months. If you are in a situationship though, you might never make plans that are more than a week in advance, preferring to simply live in the moment. You may also still be going to events such as wedding ceremonies or New Year’s events alone.

You Have Never Meet Each Other’s Friends or Colleagues

On the first note, apart from the awkward run-ins, you have not officially met each other’s friends or colleagues.  Meeting friends usually, signifies that the relationship has the ability to be long-term. Several people do not want to introduce someone to their friends if they would be around next week. Introducing them indicates commitment. Whereas in a situationship, at most in this kind of relationship the closest you can perhaps come to making a commitment is to begin watching a new web series together at most. Nothing more than that. *

There are a Few Taboos

Being in a situationship, you tend to always be playing a game of chicken while texting. So, if one of you doesn’t respond for a long time, you cannot easily just ask what is going on. Lack of commitment means you do not wish to appear as the needy or clingy one, since you are technically not even in a defined relationship. Also, you are certainly not on each other’s social media too.

You Have Sleepovers Regularly

It does not feel necessary to leave straight away post-sex because you do not simply go over to hook-up. Even though your relationship could be largely physical, you still do plenty of the domesticated activities that couples normally do.  You stay overnight at each other’s places, have breakfast, and even have your toothbrush at their homes.

You Have Feelings for Each Other But Not Love, But You Simply Never Talks About This

Despite not admitting it to the person you are seeing, you have certainly caught feelings. However, you do not love them. Communication is vital in a serious relationship, but in situationships people merely tend not to talk about their true feelings. While it could be fun for a while, it is essential to bear in mind that the uncertainty may get a bit too much eventually.

What happens if you get yourself in a situationship?

If you are dating in 2021 and a millennial, then you will possibly find yourself in a situationship. If you are not already in one now. Millennials somewhat specifically tend to be “scared of the responsibility and expectation that comes along with the label girlfriend or boyfriend and so the ‘what are we’ conversation simply never happens.

While pressure and label-free relationship sound good, but one never knows situationships can actually be quite toxic. The repeated uncertainty of the other person’s feelings and thoughts can rapidly turn from exciting to exhausting. The worst thing is that when a situationship finishes, you say to yourself that you cannot get even properly upset about it because it was not even theoretically a relationship. Situationships are not for everyone. If it is not what you actually wish, then get out of it immediately. Put yourself first and never settle for anything you do not deserve.

Your Counselor Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away

During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control COVID-19 spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.

However, in this age of coronavirus, we hope to offer our therapeutic help. Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you meet with your therapist is no exception.  But try it before you disregard this option.  This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and anxieties are running high.

You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option. Instead, it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service!

Feel free to call Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional and psychological challenges.