Emotional intimacy is an art, but it eventually becomes a method of being in a relationship. It would be better to describe emotional intimacy as the experience of being emotionally connected and in sync with your partners. It involves a level of openness and vulnerability from both individuals and increases the overall sense of closeness you feel with your partner in daily life. Without emotional intimacy, it can be difficult for couples to weather the storms of life together.
Emotional intimacy is ultimately that glue which holds a relationship together, post the initial excitement fizzles. Couples who are emotionally intimate are able to overcome conflict more easily because they understand each one better and is able to communicate their feelings to each other. Fortunately, there are ways to form emotional intimacy if you haven’t quite tapped into it yet. Firstly, you need to check in on your relationship.
In this article top Marriage Counselor in India Shivani Misri Sadhoo talks about signs that your relationship perhaps lacks emotional intimacy and connection.
You Feel Awkwardly Distant
Without any emotional intimacy, your relationship may have a distance to it that you cannot quite pinpoint, almost as if your partner’s real feelings are always at arms’ length.
This is a sign of a lack of emotional intimacy if you might not know the reason, but you’re feeling distant and isolated from your partner, or perhaps you aren’t talking as much or spending as much time together. This distance in relationships can mostly signal a lack of emotional intimacy, and a need to nourish and nurture the emotional bond that fuels togetherness and connection. Try asking your partner a few questions about the relationship, and see how things head from there.
None of you Talk about your Emotions
A lack of transparency is another huge sign that you and your partner have not laid a solid foundation of emotional intimacy yet in your relationship. You have to be able to talk about your feelings and emotions with each other. These things are difficult to talk about because they require that you practice being vulnerable and transparent. But when feelings and emotions do not get talked about, they mostly come out in different and more problematic manner. This can lead to a habit of arguing over minor things or even stonewalling each other.
Lacking the security and confidence to share your feelings or being afraid that your partner will invalidate your feelings is a sign that your relationship is perhaps lacking emotional intimacy. So start out small, opening up to your partner about your daily anxieties, and see how your partner responds.
Perhaps One of You Shares Lot More than the Other
If one of the partners shares more than the other, it could be hard to notice that emotional intimacy is lacking. It may simply seem like someone’s a good listener. But it often means that there is an imbalance.
This might be a sign that a partner does not feel safe or comfortable expressing themselves openly in the relationship; conversely, it might also mean a partner is not creating space for their partner to be open and vulnerable with them. So, whether you realize that you are opening up more, or not quite sufficient, bring up this issue with your partner. It could be possible to resolve on its own.
You Do Not Touch Much Outside the Bedroom
When it is about the physical touch, there actually is a clear parallel between emotional and physical intimacy. It simply might not be in the ways you think. It is not a good sign if when you and your partner are alone there is a very small physical connection such as sitting close, holding hands, those small manners one expresses emotional intimacy.
Comfortable physical closeness needs a degree of emotional closeness. Thus, your physical distance might actually be symbolic. Emotional intimacy is the base for physical intimacy. When you are emotionally connected, you are physically connected and it makes your physical connection all the way better. This means that, if you realize you do not touch much, the solution is not to simply start holding hands and nothing else. Like all other areas of emotional intimacy, it is a sign that you perhaps need to open up more as a couple.
You Do Not Ask Each Other for Advice
In a relationship, both the partners must be able to support each other no matter what. Sadly, that’s difficult to accomplish if neither of you are really asking the other for help when you need it. No one’s life must be dictated by their partner, but your relationship must be a place you can go for guidance. It is a sign you do not have emotional intimacy if you do not ask for each other’s opinion or advice. This may indicate that you are not emotionally secure enough in your relationship to ask for each other’s help. So, assess whether the problem is on your end or theirs, and look to open up about it when you feel you can.
Emotional intimacy is a sign of a good relationship, but lacking it does not mean you, as a couple, are destined to doom. With a brief hard work, you and your partner can pinpoint the areas where you need help, and begin to fix things from there. Whether it means going on more dates, having some heart-to-hearts, or heading to couples counseling, there are methods to protect a good thing. If it is meant to be, it will surely work out.
Your Counselor Is Now Just Skype/Video Call Away
During the current challenging time, it’s common to experience anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and relationship challenges at home. While you are under lockdown and maintaining social distancing norms to help the country to control COVID-19 spread, your very own counsellor Shivani is now just a call and Skype video call away from you.
However, in this age of coronavirus, we hope to offer our
therapeutic help. Change is difficult for all of us and changing the way you
meet with your therapist is no exception. But try it before you disregard
this option. This is a challenging moment in time, and fears and
anxieties are running high.
You may find, telepsychology isn’t a second-rate option. Instead,
it’s an effective and efficient upgrade to a valuable service!
Feel free to call Counselor Shivani
Misri Sadhoo at +91-8860875040 for telephonic or video support and to
book an online counselling session to address any relationship issues, emotional
and psychological challenges.