Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

The internet has indeed revolutionized the world. Gone are the days when information was scarce and communication was slow.

Today, with just a few clicks or taps, we can delve into a vast repository of knowledge on virtually any topic and connect with individuals worldwide in an instant. Social media, in particular, has streamlined the process of finding romantic partners, transcending geographical boundaries and time zones. Yet, amid its convenience, social media has also become a breeding ground for relationship issues. The same platforms that bring couples closer together can also harbour hidden red flags that may signal trouble ahead.

To understand these social media red flags, let’s explore the perspective of top relationship expert and marriage counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo on the social media behaviours that should not be ignored in relationships.

What are the social media red flags in relationships?

Couples therapist, Shivani Misri Sadhoo says to find out you need to check the following signs:

Pretending to be single

When a partner behaves as if they’re single on social media—keeping relationship status hidden, avoiding posting photos together, or asking not to be tagged—it raises red flags. While some value privacy, constant avoidance of mentioning the relationship may indicate keeping options open or a lack of commitment. Genuine partners don’t hide relationships; secrecy may suggest dishonesty, embarrassment, or external pressure. Openness and acknowledgement are essential for healthy relationships.

Is your partner spending too much time on social media?

Spending excessive time on social media during dates can detract from romance, signaling that your partner’s focus isn’t on you. It may indicate addiction, where the virtual world overshadows real connections. Social media’s curated facade fosters dissatisfaction and can be an escape from unhappiness. Ignoring moments like sunsets hints at prioritizing screens over shared experiences. Recognizing these signs is crucial; excessive social media use can signal deeper issues affecting relationships and personal well-being.

Posting flirtatious remarks on others’ social media posts

Flirting with others on social media, especially through public comments, signals a lack of commitment and respect in a relationship. This behavior undermines trust and emotional security, akin to infidelity. Engaging in such actions can lead to feelings of betrayal and hurt. Consistently leaving flirty comments on others’ posts raises doubts about one’s intentions and loyalty. It’s crucial to reflect on whether this behavior aligns with your expectations for a healthy, monogamous relationship.

Not accepting social media requests

Many a time, refusing to accept a connection request on social media signals reluctance to integrate into each other’s lives. It suggests a lack of transparency and openness. Denying the request may indicate a desire to keep aspects of one’s life hidden, potentially signaling dishonesty or unfaithfulness. By rejecting the connection, the partner may be implying a disregard for the relationship’s importance or the other person’s feelings. Overall, refusal to connect on social media can raise concerns about trust and commitment.

Reluctant in posting your relationship online

Some people choose privacy, but when a partner avoids posting about the relationship on social media while being active otherwise, it raises concerns. The absence of acknowledgment could signal a lack of commitment or reluctance to publicly affirm the relationship. This omission may lead to feelings of exclusion and impact self-esteem negatively. Comparing one’s relationship to others’ flashy posts only emphasizes the authenticity of real-life connections.

Inconsistent behavior or mismatch between online and offline conduct

When someone’s online persona is drastically different from their offline behavior, it can raise concerns about authenticity and honesty in a relationship. While it’s common for people to curate their online presence to some extent, a significant inconsistency like this can be a red flag. For instance, imagine if your partner constantly shares posts about loyalty and trust online, but in reality, they frequently lie to you about their whereabouts or interactions with others. This mismatch between their digital facade and real-life actions could erode trust and breed resentment in the relationship over time.

Decodes Relationship Expert Shivani Sadhoo

If you thought that simply finding the perfect partner guarantees a happily ever after, think again. Love alone doesn’t shield us from moments of unhappiness or regret in marriage. As time passes, these moments can linger, potentially leading to the painful decision of separation or divorce. But what if I told you there’s a crucial factor that could significantly reduce the risk of divorce? According to relationship gurus and psychologists, timing matters just as much as compatibility—if you’re eyeing a divorce-free future, marry at the right age. Yes! Age matters!

Let’s find out more about this from India’s leading marriage counsellor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo. Getting married too young can lead to divorce. But waiting too long, which isn’t as long as you might think, can also cause problems.

Why you shouldn’t marry in your teens or early 20s?

Scientifically speaking, the human brain isn’t fully developed until the mid-20s. So, you’re still figuring out a lot about yourself and what matters to you. The risks associated with early marriage are:

• Young people lack the experience and maturity to understand themselves and their goals in life. So, they rush into a relationship only to end up marrying the wrong person. This leads to a painful divorce.
• Early marriage often means starting a family sooner, which can pose financial challenges as young couples may not have stable careers or sufficient income to support themselves and any potential children.
• Marrying early can interrupt educational pursuits, limiting career opportunities and economic stability in the long run.
• Young couples may have unrealistic expectations about marriage and their partner, which can lead to disappointment and conflict when reality does not meet their expectations.

Why you shouldn’t wait too long to get married?

Studies reveal that marrying after 32 increases your risk of divorce approximately by 5% every year. The reasons could be:

• Baggage from Past Relationships: You might still have emotional stuff from previous relationships.
• Complex Family Situations: You might have kids from previous relationships, making things more complicated.
• Money Matters: Managing finances can be more challenging with established careers and responsibilities.
• Career Stress: Jobs can demand a lot of time and energy, which might strain your relationship.
• Midlife Crises: In your late 30s or 40s, you might start questioning your life choices, which can affect your marriage.
• Changing Priorities: As you get older, what you want from life might change, causing conflicts with your partner.
• Kids Leaving Home: When your kids grow up and move out, you might realize issues in your marriage that were hidden before.
• Trouble Communicating: Over time, it might become harder to talk openly with your partner, leading to misunderstandings.
• Cheating: Though it can happen at any age, affairs might be more common in your 40s, hurting your marriage.

What’s the right age to marry?

Studies reveal that getting married between the ages of 28 and 32 is linked with a lower chance of splitting up within the next five years. This age range seems to be just right for a few reasons.

• Maturity: People in this group tend to be more grown-up and less carried away by emotions. They’ve been through enough life experiences to handle tough situations better.
• Not so rigid: At the same time, they’re not too stuck in their own habits to compromise.
• Financial Stability: They often have enough money and stability to handle marriage without extra complications like ex-partners or kids from previous relationships.

So, all in all, this age range brings a good balance of maturity, flexibility, and financial security to make marriage more likely to last.

We must remember that there is no one-size-fits-all formula for marriage. While statistics suggest an optimal age range for tying the knot, individual circumstances, readiness, and compatibility remain crucial in ensuring a lasting and fulfilling

Navigating the complexities of romantic relationships can be challenging, especially when parental dynamics come into play. While our relationships with our parents are often deeply ingrained and significant, they can sometimes inadvertently impact our romantic endeavors.

However, with awareness and intentional strategies, it’s possible to maintain healthy boundaries and prevent parental relationships from negatively affecting your romantic life, says leading family and couples therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

What are the strategies to prevent your parental relationships that may hurt your romantic life?

According to Shivani Sadhoo, you need to follow the given process that may yield you good results. These are:

Awareness is Key

The first step in preventing parental relationships from harming your romantic life is to acknowledge the influence they may have. Reflect on how your upbringing and interactions with your parents shape your views on love, communication, and intimacy.

Recognizing patterns or behaviors learned from parental relationships can empower you to address them effectively.

Open Communication

Communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship. Be open and honest with your partner about your family dynamics, including your relationship with your parents. Discuss any concerns or boundaries you feel are important to maintain within your romantic relationship.

Establish Boundaries

Setting clear boundaries is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships with both your parents and your partner. Communicate your boundaries respectfully but firmly, ensuring that both parties understand and respect each other’s needs. Boundaries may include time spent with parents, involvement in decision-making, and privacy within your romantic relationship.

Prioritize Your Partner

While it’s natural to value your relationship with your parents, it’s essential to prioritize your romantic partner. Make time for one-on-one experiences and prioritize their needs and feelings. Show your partner that they are valued and respected within the relationship.

Seek Support

If you’re struggling to navigate the complexities of parental relationships and romantic endeavors, don’t hesitate to seek support from a therapist or counselor.

Professional guidance can offer valuable insights and strategies for managing challenging dynamics and fostering healthier relationships.

Set Healthy Expectations

Unmet expectations can often lead to conflict and resentment within relationships. Be mindful of the expectations you hold for both your parents and your partner, and ensure they are realistic and healthy. Recognize that your partner cannot fulfill the role of your parent, nor should they be expected to.

Practice Self-Awareness

Take time to reflect on your own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors within your relationships. Are there patterns or triggers that stem from your parental relationships? Cultivating self-awareness can help you identify areas for personal growth and ensure that past dynamics don’t negatively impact your romantic life.

Cultivate Independence

Developing a sense of independence and autonomy is essential for maintaining healthy boundaries within relationships. While it’s natural to seek guidance and support from your parents, strive to make decisions independently and assert your own identity within your romantic relationship.

Focus on Growth

Relationships, both with parents and romantic partners, require ongoing effort and growth. Embrace opportunities for personal and relational development, and be open to learning from past experiences. Approach challenges with a growth mindset, recognizing that setbacks can lead to greater understanding and resilience.

Celebrate Differences

Embrace the uniqueness of both your parental relationships and your romantic partnership. Recognize that each relationship serves a different purpose and brings its own strengths and challenges. Celebrate the diversity of experiences and perspectives that contribute to your overall growth and fulfillment.

Preventing parental relationships from harming your romantic life requires awareness, communication, and intentional effort. By establishing boundaries, prioritizing your partner, seeking support, and fostering personal growth, you can navigate the complexities of family dynamics while nurturing a healthy and fulfilling romantic relationship.

Remember, every relationship is unique, and with patience and commitment, you can create a partnership that thrives despite any challenges along the way.

Marriage isn’t the be-all and end-all for everyone. In a world where individualism is celebrated, many people opt to remain single, prioritizing personal fulfillment over traditional notions of partnership. For some, focusing on career advancement, personal growth, or pursuing passions takes precedence over romantic entanglements. The notion that looks are the primary deciding factor when it comes to choosing a partner is completely outdated. Did you know that there are many smart and attractive women who are still single?

What are the reasons that smart and attractive women are still single?

Wonder why? Let’s find out the reasons from India’s top relationship and couples counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo.

They love their independence

Smart and attractive women often find themselves single not because they can’t find a partner, but because they value their independence fiercely. They’re not sitting around waiting for Prince Charming to ride in on a white horse because they’re too busy building their own kingdoms.

These women know they can handle anything life throws at them—they don’t need a man to rescue them from a spider or fix a leaky faucet. They’re the CEOs of their own lives, making decisions based on what’s best for them, not what society says they should do. They understand that true happiness stems from within, not from a relationship status.

It is their choice; not a compulsion

Sometimes bold and beautiful women simply want to stay single. It is their choice. There may not be any reason for this. They love their own company. Marriage is a choice for them; not a compulsion or necessity.

They have high expectations from the groom

It is true that smart and attractive women often possess high standards when it comes to relationships. They are acutely aware of their worth and what they can contribute to a partnership. While they acknowledge that perfection is unattainable, they maintain a non-negotiable list of expectations. These women seek a relationship characterized by mutual respect and emotional fulfillment, refusing to settle for anything less. Consequently, their discerning standards may lead them to remain single as they patiently await a connection that aligns with their values and aspirations.

They feel vulnerable

Despite their outward confidence, many smart and attractive women harbor a fear of vulnerability. Past heartbreaks or betrayals intensify this fear, leading to emotional distance in relationships. They struggle to open up, fearing rejection or disappointment despite their intelligence and attractiveness.

They’re too busy

Smart, attractive women often stay single because they prioritize their professional success. They’re fully invested in self-improvement and don’t always make time for dating apps. Their focus is on bettering themselves through career advancement and personal growth. They believe true love will come naturally when the timing is right, choosing not to waste time on distractions they can’t control.

They don’t want to lose their authority

Many smart, strong, and stunning women choose to remain single because they value their independence and autonomy above all else. They’ve always been the ones to take the reins, make decisions, and chart their own course without being swayed by others. The thought of relinquishing control to someone else in marriage feels daunting; they fear losing their authority and sense of self. These women aren’t afraid to be labeled as “control freaks” because they know what they want and won’t settle for anything less than full autonomy over their lives.

Men feel intimidated

Many men feel intimidated by her strong personality and find her unapproachable, so she remains single. She’s amazing, smart, and attractive, which can be intimidating for guys. They think they’re not good enough for her. She doesn’t settle for just any relationship; it has to be worthwhile. She values her time and energy and won’t waste it on something that doesn’t feel right. She knows there’s more to her than just her relationship status. She understands the difference between forcing a bad relationship and giving a good one a chance.

These are just a few reasons why smart, attractive women may choose to remain single. Whether it’s prioritizing independence, career, or personal growth, their decision reflects a deep understanding of self-worth and a refusal to settle.

Why is it that finding love often feels like stumbling through a maze blindfolded? We all have our preferences, our checkboxes, and our ideal visions of a perfect partner. Yet, despite our best efforts, we often find ourselves making mistakes along the way.

What kind of mistakes do we make while looking for love?

Let’s get to know about the same from India’s leading marriage counselor, Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

Having Great Expectations

Perhaps one of the biggest mistakes people make when searching for love is having oversized expectations. They hope for a fairy-tale romance without any hiccups. But always remember that real relationships require effort. We often pressure ourselves to find love by a certain deadline and rush to advance to the next stage within a specific timeline.

However, each relationship and person is unique, so our expectations going into dating shouldn’t be the same for everyone we meet; everyone is on their own path. Instead of imposing deadlines, we should be open and accepting of ‘what will be, will be’ and enjoy the moment. Putting pressure on ourselves takes away the fun and thrills that dating can offer.

Impatience

There’s no point in rushing into relationships as they often lead to trouble. It’s tempting to dive in headfirst, but ignoring red flags can spell disaster. Patience is key; good things take time. Let things evolve naturally, truly understanding your partner and their values before making big commitments. Chemistry trumps passion for longevity. A strong connection ensures a healthier, longer-lasting relationship. So, take it slow and let love blossom at its own pace.

Focusing on External Appearance

Sometimes, on our quest for true love, we get caught up in the glitz and glamour of external appearances, forgetting to delve deeper into the essence of the person we’ve fallen for. It’s easy to be drawn in by good looks or charm, but true connection lies in understanding and appreciating the inner beauty that defines a person.

By solely focusing on superficial qualities, we risk missing out on the qualities that truly matter – kindness, empathy, intelligence, and shared values. These are the qualities that create a strong and enduring bond, making the pursuit of superficial attributes a big mistake in the search for genuine love.

Lack of Self-awareness

Another mistake people often make while looking for true love is neglecting to understand themselves. Failing to delve into self-discovery and grasp their values, goals, and desires from a relationship can hinder the journey toward finding genuine love. It’s essential to explore one’s own love stories, identify the qualities and traits that resonate with them, and understand their patterns of thought and behavior in relationships.

Without this self-awareness, individuals may struggle to make informed choices when selecting potential partners, resulting in incompatible relationships. Understanding oneself better empowers individuals to navigate the complexities of love and make decisions aligned with their long-term vision for a fulfilling relationship.

Seeking Validation

Are you in search of true love only because you want to feel important or to be noticed? Seeking validation from friends, family, or a partner is a big mistake. It leads to unhealthy dependency and unhappiness. True love should complement your life, not define it entirely. Before searching for love, love and fulfill yourself first.

Seeking external validation can lead to low self-esteem. You might start relying on others’ recognition and approval to feel good about yourself. Over time, you could lose sight of your own value and strength.

Overlooking Red Flags

When you’re in search of true love, ignoring red flags is a significant mistake. These warning signs, such as inconsistent behaviour, lack of communication, or unresolved issues from the past, indicate underlying problems or compatibility mismatches that can lead to future turmoil and heartbreak. By overlooking these signals, you risk wasting time and emotional energy on relationships that may not be right for you.

It’s crucial to pay attention to your intuition and address red flags early on, as they can protect you from entering into unhealthy or unfulfilling connections. Recognizing and addressing these warning signs allows you to make informed decisions, fostering healthier relationships built on trust, respect, and mutual understanding.

There are more aspects to consider when seeking love, but avoiding common mistakes like unrealistic expectations and ignoring red flags can pave the way for genuine, fulfilling connections. Remember, patience, self-awareness, and authenticity are key to finding lasting love.

Love, they say, knows no bounds. But what happens when distance creeps in and love is put to the test? Long-distance relationships are a modern-day testament to the strength of love in the face of physical separation. Even in the most loving relationships, infidelity can shatter trust.

Finding out that your long-distance partner is unfaithful is heartbreaking, tearing apart the strong connection you share. So, how do you find out if your long-distance partner is being unfaithful? Delhi’s leading relationship and marriage counselor, Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares a few warning signs in this article.

What are some of the terrible signs that show your long-distance is being unfaithful?

Couples therapist Shivani Sadhoo, says, you may identify via the following things:

Inconsistent Communication

When your long-distance partner begins to dodge regular communication, it could indicate something amiss. While occasional busy spells are understandable, consistent avoidance raises concerns. A shift from frequent calls and intentional planning of dates to fewer interactions or vague excuses hints at potential infidelity. In successful long-distance relationships, consistent communication is vital, and deviations from this norm should prompt investigation into underlying issues or potential unfaithfulness.

Gets angry often

When your partner starts getting easily irritated or annoyed, especially over small things, it could be a sign that something’s up. In a long-distance relationship, it’s important to stay connected and understanding. But if your partner suddenly seems short-tempered, it might mean they’re not happy in the relationship.

It’s like they’ve lost their patience with you, which isn’t normal if they used to be sweet and patient before. This change in behavior could mean they’re emotionally checked out or even looking for a way out. And if they’re not feeling connected to you anymore, they might be turning to someone else for that emotional support. So, when they start acting differently, it’s worth paying attention to what’s really going on.

Frequent Technical Glitches

If your long-distance partner keeps encountering technical issues whenever you try to connect with them, it could be a sign that something isn’t right. Think about it: every time you’re excited to talk, their phone mysteriously runs out of battery, or their internet suddenly becomes unreliable. It’s like they’re always finding an excuse to avoid having meaningful conversations with you. You might notice a pattern where they blame their device for problems like a faulty camera or microphone, making it difficult for you to video or voice call them.

And when you question them about it, they might even claim their account was hacked or is behaving strangely, adding another layer of suspicion. But what if these “accidental” tech issues happen all the time? It starts to feel less like bad luck and more like a deliberate attempt to avoid you. It’s painful to consider, but maybe these constant technical glitches are covering up something deeper – like your partner being unfaithful.

Always Busy

Earlier, your partner used to make time for you effortlessly, adjusting their schedule just to chat with you freely. But now, it feels like they’re always busy, never having a moment for you. It might seem like you’re constantly trying to connect, but they always seem to have something more important going on. When one partner becomes consistently too occupied for quality time together, it can trigger doubts about fidelity in a long-distance relationship.

Contradictory Explanation

Pay close attention to any inconsistencies or contradictions in your long-distance partner’s narratives. If you notice that their explanations don’t align or if you catch them in lies, it could be a clear indication that they are hiding something from you. Trust your instincts and be vigilant about red flags, no matter how seemingly insignificant.

For instance, if a friend informs you that they saw your partner in a compromising situation with someone else, it’s crucial to address the issue. When you confront your partner about your suspicions, be wary if they attempt to change the topic or deflect the question. This behaviour may suggest they are avoiding the truth, especially if they consistently sidestep the issue.

Now that you’re aware of these warning signs, stay vigilant in your long-distance relationship. Consistent communication, understanding changes in behavior, and addressing inconsistencies are key to maintaining trust and addressing potential issues before they escalate.

Leading marriage counsellor and couples therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo explains why it is important to continue with your therapy even when you find it tough to handle.

When life throws us curve balls and we feel like we’re constantly running on empty, how do we navigate the maze of emotions that come with it? In a world where the pace never seems to slow down, where do we find solace and support for our mental and emotional well-being?

The answer may lie in therapy.

In today’s fast-paced world, it’s all too easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of daily life. From work deadlines to family obligations, the relentless demands on our time and energy can leave us feeling drained and overwhelmed. And when faced with challenges or setbacks, it’s not uncommon to find ourselves struggling to cope with the flood of emotions that accompany them.

But what if there was a way to untangle the knots of our emotions, to make sense of the chaos within ourselves?

Therapy is working for you

At first, therapy feels good. You connect with your therapist, feel understood, and learn about yourself. But then you hit a wall. You talk in circles, feel irritated, and dislike therapy. It’s normal. It means you’re making progress, confronting things you’d rather avoid.

It’s tough but part of the process. If therapy would have been easy, everybody would have been doing it. Sometimes your therapist dives deep into your subconscious to uncover painful memories. Don’t give up, it’s all part of the journey towards healing.

Improvement of Coping Skills

Did you know that our life experiences shape how we deal with emotions? Interactions with others and life events affect how we react to what happens to us. When you talk to a psychologist when you’re feeling good, it’s easier to think about things and become more aware. Therapy makes you feel safe and helps you understand how you handle emotions.

It can also help you replace unhealthy coping mechanisms with better ones. Therapy gives you a chance to learn new ways to deal with tough situations or feelings. Your therapist can show you how to spot negative thoughts and change them to feel better. This can lead to a happier mood and better overall health.

Improves Clarity of Thought

It is quite natural to feel bothered by things from time to time, even if your overall life is happy. These could include annoying habits from your partner, family discussions, or work issues. Dealing with these challenges can affect your daily well-being and long-term happiness. Talking to a therapist can help you understand and clarify your emotions.

They offer an outside perspective that can be very useful. While family and friends can help, therapists are trained to listen and provide helpful insights. Identifying your feelings and why you’re feeling them is healthy and makes them easier to manage.

Helps in Personal Growth

Therapy often helps you rediscover your inner self. It sees difficulties not as roadblocks but as stepping stones for personal growth. This psychological path lets you explore your mind and understand yourself better.

Instead of changing external circumstances, therapy focuses on how you cope and respond to them. It’s an inward journey where gaining insight helps you grow into the person you want to be, boosting your self-efficacy and fulfilment. A trained psychologist guides you with understanding and tools for this transformation.

Teaches you different strategies to handle stress better

Therapy offers valuable tools and techniques for handling life’s challenges smoothly. It provides strategies like cognitive-behavioural methods and mindfulness practices. Therapists help clients manage stress, anxiety, and depression. With practice, individuals can develop self-awareness and emotional control. This empowers them to face life’s hurdles with more confidence.

Therapy isn’t just about overcoming obstacles; it’s a journey toward self-discovery and a more fulfilling life. In essence, persisting through the challenging phases of therapy is pivotal for profound personal growth. Embracing discomfort signifies progress, honing coping skills, clarifying thoughts, fostering resilience, and acquiring strategies for stress management.

Dating an independent woman can be an enriching experience, but it also comes with its own set of nuances. So, what exactly do independent women want from men in relationships?

First and foremost, it’s essential to understand who an independent woman is. She’s not just someone who pays her bills or pursues her career goals. An independent woman knows herself deeply, speaks her mind with clarity, and lives authentically according to her values. She doesn’t seek validation or fulfilment from others; instead, she finds it within herself.

What are the things independent women want from men?

Let us learn from leading marriage and relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

Respect

Independent women seek partners who not only recognize but celebrate their autonomy. A secure man values her self-reliance, encouraging her aspirations and respecting her need for space. He engages in constructive dialogue, cherishes her uniqueness, and supports her goals.

Moreover, he values her physical boundaries and emotional well-being, recognizing that true allure lies in his ability to comprehend and connect with her as an individual while acknowledging the unity within their shared journey.

Equality in relationships

An independent woman looks for a partner who is her equal, not her competitor. She believes in sharing responsibilities, making decisions together, and working as a team to build a life. This means both partners pitch in and share the load, creating a balanced and satisfying dynamic.

Equality isn’t just about the basics; it’s about fairness, talking openly, and understanding each other. It’s about seeing and respecting each other’s differences and treating each other’s opinions and contributions with value, regardless of what society says.

Honest communication

Good communication is vital for a healthy relationship. Independent women appreciate partners who are upfront and willing to have deep conversations. She values openness and honesty, so it’s important to be direct and assertive like her.

Don’t shy away from expressing your thoughts and feelings. She wants her partner to be transparent and vulnerable too, as this builds intimacy and strengthens the relationship. So, keep the dialogue open and honest for a deeper connection that grows stronger over time.

Emotional connection

Sometimes, grasping the unspoken nuances becomes crucial. An empowered and self-reliant woman places great value on emotional availability in a relationship. Recognizing the significance of emotional intimacy, she seeks a connection that goes beyond shared interests and physical attraction. Fearless in embracing vulnerability, she desires a partner who shares this openness.

For her, a relationship is a comprehensive bond that involves mutual support and understanding. Even the most self-sufficient woman may, at times, yearn to be vulnerable, allowing her partner to be the pillar of strength.

They want their partners to follow their own dreams too

Independent women seek partners who are strong and self-sufficient. They are drawn to individuals who can handle their own lives without constant support. These women value ambition and expect their partners to have their own aspirations.

Being with someone who is driven not only adds excitement to the relationship but also fosters personal growth and independence. Such partnerships propel both parties toward their dreams and create a supportive environment for mutual success.

Looks for unconditional love

An independent woman values her needs in a relationship. Despite her strength, she desires love, care, and consideration. Like anyone, she seeks a partner who embraces her flaws, celebrates her uniqueness, and stands by her through life’s challenges. Recognize her feelings, be there for her, and show unconditional love for a flourishing relationship.

Now that we’ve explored what independent women expect from their partners—respect, equality, honest communication, emotional connection, and shared dreams—it’s evident that they seek relationships built on mutual understanding and support. These expectations foster strong bonds where both individuals thrive personally and collectively, embracing each other’s autonomy and aspirations.

Communication is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. Yet, expressing your needs and desires can sometimes feel daunting or uncomfortable. Whether you’re seeking more affection, support, or understanding, learning how to ask for and get what you need in a relationship is crucial for its growth and longevity. Here are some effective strategies to help you navigate this process as shared by Delhi’s leading couples therapist and relationship counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

In what ways could you ask and get what you need in your relationship?

Reflect on Your Needs: Before initiating a conversation with your partner, take some time to reflect on your needs and desires. What are you seeking from the relationship? What specific changes or actions would fulfill those needs? Understanding your own feelings and motivations will help you communicate more effectively.

Choose the Right Time and Place: Timing is crucial when addressing sensitive topics. Choose a time when both you and your partner are calm, relaxed, and free from distractions. Find a quiet and private space where you can have an open and honest conversation without interruptions.

Use “I” Statements: When expressing your needs, use “I” statements to convey your thoughts and feelings without placing blame on your partner. For example, instead of saying, “You never listen to me,” try saying, “I feel unheard when we don’t have meaningful conversations.”

Be Clear and Specific: Clearly articulate your needs and preferences to avoid misunderstandings. Provide specific examples and suggestions for how your partner can meet your needs. Avoid vague or passive-aggressive communication, as it can lead to frustration and confusion.

Practice Active Listening: Communication is a two-way street. Be sure to actively listen to your partner’s response without interrupting or becoming defensive. Validate their feelings and demonstrate empathy, even if you may not fully agree with their perspective.

Focus on Solutions: Instead of dwelling on past conflicts or assigning blame, focus on finding solutions that satisfy both partners. Brainstorm together and be willing to compromise to reach a mutually beneficial outcome.

Express Appreciation: Acknowledge and appreciate your partner’s efforts to meet your needs, even if they may fall short at times. Positive reinforcement can strengthen your bond and encourage continued efforts to support each other.

Seek Professional Help if Needed: If communication barriers persist or if you’re struggling to address deep-seated issues, consider seeking the guidance of a couples therapist or counselor. A trained professional can provide impartial support and offer valuable tools to improve communication and resolve conflicts.

Practice Patience and Persistence: Building effective communication skills takes time and effort. Be patient with yourself and your partner as you navigate this process together. Stay committed to open and honest communication, and be willing to adapt and learn from each other along the way.

Revisit and Revise: As your relationship evolves, so too may your needs and priorities. Regularly revisit conversations about your needs and make adjustments as necessary. Keep the lines of communication open and continue to work together to nurture a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

Asking for and getting what you need in a relationship requires courage, vulnerability, and a willingness to communicate openly and honestly. By following these strategies and fostering a culture of mutual respect and understanding, you can create a relationship that is supportive, fulfilling, and enduring.

Are you head over heels for your girl, planning the big engagement, but still wondering if she’s “the one”? Finding the right person to spend your life with can feel like searching for a needle in a haystack. Amidst the sea of possibilities, there are certain signs that can help guide you towards someone truly special. While romantic gestures and thoughtful actions certainly play a part, the ultimate litmus test lies in how she makes you feel.

How do you find out if she’s the one you’ve been wanting to tie the knot with?

Top marriage counselor and relationship expert in India Shivani Misri Sadhoo explains how.

Empathy

Finding “the one” involves recognizing someone who empathizes genuinely. She listens and understands your feelings without judgment. Her compassion and support during tough times show her commitment. Marrying her means having a partner who stands by you through thick and thin, making every challenge easier to face together.

She’s your best friend

Choosing a life partner is like embarking on a journey with a trusted companion, and finding that person who seamlessly fits into the role of your best friend can make all the difference. You can share your feelings with her comfortably. You don’t need to pretend. You can be yourself. Whatever happens, she’s always there for you. So, when you find that special someone who makes you feel at home, who makes you laugh until your stomach hurts, and who you can’t imagine facing life without, you’ll know that she’s the one you should marry. 

She always encourages you    

Marrying a woman who constantly encourages and supports you is a blessing beyond measure. Her unwavering belief in your abilities fuels your confidence and drive. Even in your darkest hours, she sees your potential and lifts you up with her boundless faith. With her by your side, you’re inspired to conquer any challenge, knowing she believes you’re capable of magic. She’s not just a partner; she’s your greatest ally and cheerleader.

Shared goals and values

Shared goals and values serve as the compass guiding you to the right partner for marriage. When your beliefs, priorities, and long-term aspirations align with hers, it signals compatibility and ensures a harmonious journey together. While differences add spice, fundamental agreements on family, career, and life goals lay the groundwork for a fulfilling relationship. Finding someone who complements your strengths while sharing your core values is the key to a lasting union.

You trust her

Trust is the foundation of a healthy relationship. If you can’t trust your partner, who will you talk to about your deepest feelings?  When you’re with someone trustworthy, you feel secure because you know they care about you. Whether it’s staying faithful or keeping their promises, a woman who is honest and dependable is someone you can imagine a future with.

When arguments are productive

When you’re able to have productive discussions, even during disagreements, it demonstrates a level of emotional intelligence and communication skills that are vital for a healthy relationship. It means you’re able to listen actively, express your own thoughts and feelings honestly, and find compromises that satisfy both parties.

Mutual respect is a must

Mutual respect in a relationship is a cornerstone of a healthy partnership. When your girl respects you as an individual, honors your boundaries, and treats you with kindness, it indicates a strong foundation for a lifelong commitment.  In her, you find not just a partner, but a soulmate worthy of a lifelong journey together.

She is independent

She is strong and independent, with a mind of her own. This quality assures you that she won’t simply follow the crowd but will stand by her beliefs. Her strength inspires you, and her independence assures you of mutual respect and space within the relationship. Knowing she can navigate life’s challenges independently gives you confidence in facing them together as a team.

These are just some of the essential qualities couples therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo highlights for finding the right partner. Ultimately, marrying someone who embodies empathy, friendship, encouragement, shared values, trust, effective communication, mutual respect, and independence ensures a fulfilling lifelong journey together.