Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

Key Summary

• Deep Friendship: Being genuine friends allows couples to communicate freely and authentically, building a comfortable connection that deepens over time.
• Emotional Safety: A strong relationship provides a secure environment where partners don’t have to pretend, hide their feelings, or fear that every disagreement will end in a massive fight.
• Trust and Respect: These qualities eliminate constant doubt. When partners feel heard and accepted for who they are, they can navigate life’s inevitable challenges together as a team.

What do you think is the most important ingredient of a happy relationship? Today, when we read about painful breakups and heartbreaking divorces, we often wonder whether love is the only glue that holds two people together. Is romance the single force that keeps a relationship alive?

According to many therapists and relationship researchers, several couples live a happy life even when the passionate romance of their younger years no longer occupies centre stage. The butterflies may become less frequent, the grand gestures fewer, and the stolen moments of courtship may quietly surrender to grocery lists, parent-teacher meets, family obligations, and mounting responsibilities. Yet, amid all the hustle and bustle, many relationships not only endure but flourish.

This is perhaps because we have always thought that love and romance are the key factors for a happy relationship. Life does not always resemble the final scenes of a romantic film. In fact, life begins where the movie ends. We do not hesitate to celebrate dramatic proposals, candlelit dinners, surprise holidays, and extravagant declarations of affection. Rarely do we celebrate the husband who patiently waits outside the chemotherapy ward or the wife who instinctively remembers every medication her partner needs without ever being asked.

Marriage counsellors often talk about two different kinds of love that shape a relationship over time.

• The first one is passionate love. It is the kind that sweeps you off your feet. It is filled with excitement, longing, butterflies in the stomach, and the thrill of discovering someone new. It makes every conversation feel special and every meeting something to look forward to.

• The second one is Companionate love, a quieter but no less meaningful form of love. It does not arrive with fireworks. Instead, it grows slowly through years of shared experiences, unwavering trust, mutual respect, and the comfort of knowing that someone will stand beside you through life’s highs and lows. It is the kind of love that remains when the excitement of the early years naturally gives way to the rhythms of everyday life.

While passionate love may bring two people together, companionate love is often what helps them stay together. It is this quiet, enduring bond that carries couples through changing careers, financial challenges, raising children, caring for ageing parents, illness, and all the unexpected twists that life inevitably brings.

Is Romantic Love Enough to Keep a Relationship Happy?

Romantic love is often seen as the foundation of a successful relationship, but therapists believe it is only one part of a much bigger picture. While the excitement, passion, and emotional intensity of the early years can strengthen the bond between two people, these feelings naturally evolve.

As couples navigate careers, family responsibilities, financial commitments, and life’s unexpected challenges, the relationship begins to rely on qualities that go beyond romance. Emotional security, mutual trust, respect, companionship, and the ability to support one another through changing circumstances often become the true pillars of a lasting partnership.

Rather than asking whether romance fades, a more meaningful question is whether the relationship continues to provide comfort, understanding, and a sense of belonging. According to marriage therapists, these enduring qualities are what help many couples remain genuinely happy even when romantic gestures become less frequent.

Let’s find out from eminent couples and marriage counsellor in Delhi, Shivani Misri Sadhoo, if Couples Can Be Happy Without Romantic Love.

1. Friendship Is Important

Friendship is often the quiet strength that keeps a relationship happy. When couples are friends first, they try to get to know each other in a comfortable space and can talk freely about anything and everything. Trust is the cornerstone of any relationship. Romantic love may fade over the years. But friendship has a way of growing deeper. It brings comfort, understanding, and a sense of home, making a relationship happier and far more enduring.

2. Safety and Security Matters

Love is not the sole reason for happiness in a relationship. When couples feel safe with each other, the relationship automatically grows stronger. One does not need to hide their feelings, or pretend to be someone they are not, or worry that every disagreement will turn into a fight. Simple moments like sharing a meal, asking about how the day went, or ending the day with a walk in the park help build that sense of safety. Over time, it is this feeling of being accepted and understood that keeps a relationship strong.

3. Mutual Trust and Respect

A relationship does not last only because of love. Something that keeps it strong and survives life’s ups and downs is the trust and confidence two people have in each other. When there is trust, there is no constant doubt or insecurity. And when there is respect, both partners feel heard, valued, and accepted for who they are. Even when romance fades with time or disagreements arise, trust and respect create a sense of emotional safety that helps couples stay connected, solve problems together, and build a happy life side by side.

4. Sweet memories

 Yes, those sweet memories that a couple creates over the years often become the heart of their relationship. They may smile while remembering their first holiday together, laugh over a silly mistake, or cherish moments spent raising children, celebrating milestones, or simply sharing everyday life. These memories remind them of the journey they have travelled side by side. When romantic feelings are less intense, looking back on these moments rekindles warmth, gratitude, and companionship. Sometimes, it is these treasured memories, more than love itself, that keep a relationship happy and enduring.

5. A Good Company

Some of the happiest couples will tell you that what keeps a relationship alive isn’t grand declarations of love but genuinely enjoying each other’s company. When two people laugh together, talk without effort, share everyday moments, and feel comfortable simply being themselves, they create a friendship that carries them through life’s ups and downs. Love may bring two people together, but good companionship gives them a reason to stay. It makes ordinary days meaningful, reduces loneliness, and helps a relationship remain warm, steady, and fulfilling even when romance naturally becomes less intense.

A happy relationship is rarely built on romance alone. While passionate love may change with time, friendship, trust, emotional safety, mutual respect, shared memories, and simply enjoying each other’s company often become the real pillars of a lasting bond. Love may light the spark, but it is these everyday connections that help couples build a relationship that feels secure, meaningful, and deeply fulfilling.

“Romance may bring two people together, but trust, friendship, emotional safety, and companionship are what help them build a relationship that lasts a lifetime.” — Shivani Misri Sadhoo, Gottman Recommended Indian Marriage Counsellor | Clinical Psychologist at IBS Hospital, Lajpat Nagar, Delhi

Summary

• Floodlighting means sharing deeply personal information too early in a relationship.
• Oversharing can create false intimacy and overwhelm the other person.
• Healthy relationships develop through gradual trust, mutual vulnerability, and time.

“I don’t know why, but I simply felt comfortable talking to you.”

This must be a familiar sentence for many people, right after a first or second date. Sometimes, it feels flattering. After all, emotional openness is the foundation of a healthy relationship. While some people are naturally guarded and prefer not to reveal too much about themselves in the early stages of dating, others are complete open books. Before they even realise it, they have shared intimate details about childhood trauma, painful breakups, family conflicts, financial struggles, or other personal information with someone they barely know.

This behaviour of disclosing too much, too soon has a name in today’s dating world. It is called Floodlighting. It seems there is no end to the ever-growing dictionary of modern dating terms. From ghosting and situationship to love bombing and orbiting, new terms continue to emerge as relationships evolve in the digital era.

Eminent relationship and couples counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo talks about Floodlighting, the new relationship trend that is trending nowadays.

What does the term “floodlighting” mean?

In the early stages of dating, opening up to someone is a natural part of building a connection. But, when a person starts revealing intensely personal experiences, emotional wounds, or other extremely private details long before trust has had a chance to develop, it is called Floodlighting.

While it may appear to be an act of honesty or vulnerability, it often stems from a subconscious need or vulnerability, it often stems from a subconscious need to fast-track emotional proximity or seek reassurance. Ironically, this kind of premature oversharing can create the opposite effect.

Instead of strengthening the bond, it can overwhelm the other person and become a way of keeping genuine intimacy at arm’s length. In many cases, floodlighting is less about being truly emotionally open and more about using vulnerability as a shield before a relationship has had the time to grow naturally.

“Floodlighting may create the feeling of instant closeness, but genuine intimacy is built through trust, not premature vulnerability.” – Shivani Misri Sadhoo, Gottman Recommended Indian Marriage Counsellor | Clinical Psychologist at IBS Hospital, Lajpat Nagar, Delhi.

Tell-tale Signs of Floodlighting

1. Sharing Too Much

One of the telltale signs of floodlighting is oversharing. They do not hesitate to talk about their past experiences, some of which have been quite traumatic to someone whom they barely know. What begins as a casual conversation about hobbies or travel can suddenly turn into a detailed account of losing a loved one, a painful custody battle, years of struggling with low self-esteem, a painful custody battle, or the heartbreak of being cheated on in a previous relationship.

While this openness often comes from a sincere desire to build a meaningful connection, sharing such deeply personal experiences too soon can leave the other person feeling emotionally overwhelmed. Healthy intimacy develops step by step, as trust grows naturally over time.

2. You Expect Instant Emotional Reciprocity

Another common sign of floodlighting is expecting instant emotional reciprocity. After disclosing deeply personal experiences, you may unconsciously hope that your date will respond by sharing their own deeply personal experiences.

But, much to your disappointment, your date may not want to share such similar experiences with you. When one person shares too much too soon, it can create pressure, discomfort, and even a misleading sense of intimacy before genuine trust has had the chance to develop.

3. The Intimacy Illusion

When someone opens up about their deepest fears, past wounds, or personal struggles too early, it can create the illusion of a bond that is stronger than it really is. That emotional intensity often makes both people feel unusually close in a short span of time, even though genuine trust and intimacy usually develop gradually through shared experiences, consistency, and time.

Why do People Floodlight?

1. Acceptance Before Trust

At its heart, floodlighting is often driven by the fear of being rejected later. Some people feel that if they reveal everything about themselves right away, they’ll know whether the relationship has a future. But meaningful connections aren’t built through emotional speed. They grow through shared experiences, mutual trust, and the comfort of opening up a little more with time.

2. Beyond First Impressions

For many, sharing deeply personal stories early on feels like the quickest way to build a strong connection. But emotional closeness doesn’t happen simply because two people reveal their vulnerabilities. It grows slowly, through trust, consistency and getting to know each other over time. In the excitement of a new relationship, it’s easy to believe you’ve found someone completely safe, only to realise later that you opened your heart before the relationship had a chance to prove itself.

3. Vulnerability as Control

For some, opening up too quickly isn’t just about honesty—it’s also a way of feeling safer. By laying their deepest fears, past hurts or personal struggles on the table right away, they believe they’re staying one step ahead of possible rejection.

It’s almost as if they’re saying, “I’d rather tell you everything myself than have you find out later and judge me for it.” Strangely, what looks like vulnerability is often an attempt to stay in control of the relationship and shield themselves from emotional pain.

The Risks Involved

• Creates a false sense of intimacy before genuine trust has had time to develop.
• Can overwhelm the other person, making them feel emotionally burdened or suffocated.
• May pressure the other person to share personal details before they are ready.
• Increases the likelihood of disappointment when the initial emotional intensity fades.
• Can trigger anxiety and insecurity if the expected level of closeness is not reciprocated.
• Leaves the person oversharing more vulnerable to manipulation or exploitation by someone with unhealthy intentions.
• May create an unhealthy relationship dynamic where one partner becomes the constant emotional caregiver and the other is seen as emotionally dependent.
• Can make the relationship feel unbalanced, with emotional investment developing at different speeds for each person.
• May lead the other person to withdraw or pull away instead of feeling closer.
• Can prevent a relationship from developing naturally, as emotional vulnerability is rushed rather than built gradually through mutual trust and shared experiences.

There is nothing wrong with being vulnerable. In fact, it is what brings two people closer. But like trust, vulnerability needs time. You don’t have to tell your whole story in the first few dates. Let people earn your trust, and let the relationship grow at its own pace. That’s how lasting connections are built.

Summary

• Prioritise Safety First: Always meet in a public place, verify the person’s identity beforehand, and arrange your own transportation to ensure personal security.
• Keep Others Informed: Share your date plans, location, and expected return time with trusted friends or family members as an added safety measure.
• Trust Your Instincts: Set clear boundaries, avoid alcohol on a first meeting, and pay attention to any warning signs or uncomfortable feelings during the interaction.

Transitioning from online conversations to an in-person meeting can be both exciting and nerve-wracking. To ensure your first date is memorable for all the right reasons, relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadho at Saarthi Counselling Services outline practical, culturally relevant safety protocols—from choosing the right public venue in India to setting clear boundary communication—designed to keep young Indian couples safe and confident.

How many times has your heart skipped a beat at the prospect of meeting someone new on a date? Those butterflies in your stomach, the anticipation of a meaningful conversation, and the possibility of a genuine connection can make the experience truly exhilarating. Nowadays, with technology at your disposal, finding a new date is just a click away.

However, with convenience and speed come a few inherent risks. While the idea of meeting someone new could be exciting, not everyone we meet has honest intentions. So, it is important to be careful before we meet someone new. Our personal safety should never be compromised.

Eminent couples therapist and relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares a few dating tips to ensure the safety of Indian couples who are just starting to date.

Shivani Sadhoo adds that “The excitement of meeting someone new should never come at the cost of your safety. A meaningful relationship begins not just with attraction and trust, but with awareness, healthy boundaries, and the wisdom to protect yourself while opening your heart to new possibilities.”

Safety Tips Every Indian Couple Must Follow While Dating Someone New

1. Choose a Public Place

First and foremost, never agree to meet your prospective date at a secluded spot, far away from the public eye. No matter how romantic it might sound to meet in a deserted park or behind some old building, it is always wiser to choose a location that is crowded with people. In case of an uncomfortable situation, you can easily leave without any hesitation or problem. You know that you are in a safe place.

2. Always Verify Before You Meet

Yes. This is another important point to keep in mind when you are meeting someone new. Always verify before you plan for a formal date. This becomes even more important when you have connected with the person online and are planning to meet them offline for the first time. Many times, the person you’ve interacted with online could be a completely different person.

Nowadays, anything and everything is possible with the help of technology. The entire profile of the person could be imaginary. Hence, some kind of background verification must be done before you meet the new person. It could be a quick video call or a check through mutual friends, a look at their social media activity, something that would give you some peace of mind. After all, trust is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship.

3. Inform Your Near and Dear Ones About Your Plan

You may be an independent person and do not like to involve others, even your family members in your personal affairs. However, there are times when safety must take precedence over privacy. Thus, before going on a date with someone new, it is always wise to keep your close friends or family members informed about your plans. Let them know where you are going, who you are meeting, and when you are planning to return.

Share any other alternate contact number you have with them so that they can reach out to you when needed. Think of it as your personal safety net. This is even more important in our country, where online dating scams, identity fraud, harassment, and personal safety concerns are reported far too frequently. Being cautious does not make you fearful. It simply means you are being sensible while giving yourself the freedom to enjoy a new connection with greater confidence and peace of mind.

4. Set Clear Boundaries

Another way of staying safe before you meet someone new for your date is to set a few boundaries from the very beginning. It may sound very mechanical, but it is perhaps one of the smartest things you can do for your safety. We often get carried away when we like someone and end up ignoring our own comfort levels. Therefore, it is important to decide in advance what you are comfortable with and what you are not. It could be something as simple as sharing your personal details or accepting a late-night movie plan.

Having clear boundaries helps you stay in control of the situation and prevents you from making impulsive decisions under pressure. Moreover, it allows you to understand the other person’s intentions. Someone who genuinely respects and values you will respect your limits too. At the end of the day, a good date should make you feel comfortable, secure, happy, respected, and happy. It should be a pleasant experience.

5. Say NO to Hard Drinks/Cocktails

When you meet someone for the first time on a date, it is best to avoid hard drinks. While a glass of wine or a cocktail may seem harmless, alcohol can cloud your judgment, lower your inhibitions, and make it difficult to assess a new person or situation with clarity. Staying sober helps you to remain alert and present in the moment and make informed decisions, recognise any red flags, and ensure that your first meeting remains safe, comfortable, and enjoyable.

6. Avoid Accepting Rides from the New Person

Avoid accepting rides from the person you have just met on your date. The reason is simple: you still do not know them well enough to fully trust their intentions. It is always wiser to arrange your own transportation to and from the venue, especially when you are meeting the person for the first time. This not only helps you to maintain your dignity, but also gives you the freedom to leave early if the date turns out to be unpleasant.

7. Your Instinct Matters

It may be hard to believe, but it is true that human intuition is important. If something feels off, don’t brush that feeling aside. Give it a good thought. Sometimes, it could be just the way they look at you or say something that makes you feel uncomfortable; a feeling that you can’t really explain. Shivani Misri Sadhoo strongly feels that trusting your instincts can save you from many unpleasant and potentially risky situations.

Key Summary

• Pop-up weddings offer a ready-to-go, professionally arranged setup that eliminates the stress and time involved in traditional wedding planning.
• They are cost-effective yet elegant, allowing couples to enjoy a beautiful ceremony without overspending or compromising on quality.
• The intimate and flexible nature of pop-up weddings creates a more meaningful, experience-focused celebration suited to modern lifestyles.

Are pop-up weddings right for you? Relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo explains how simplified, intimate ceremonies reduce pre-marital stress and focus on what truly matters: your emotional connection.

Weddings are evolving, and couples today are increasingly moving away from large, elaborate ceremonies toward more meaningful, intimate experiences. One of the most talked-about trends in this shift is the pop-up wedding.

Designed to be simple, efficient, and emotionally rich, a pop-up wedding offers a refreshing alternative to traditional celebrations, which often involve months of planning and significant financial pressure. Instead of focusing on grandeur, this concept prioritises the essence of marriage—love, commitment, and shared moments. It’s not about cutting corners; it’s about reducing unnecessary stress while keeping what truly matters intact, shares Shivani Misri Sadhoo, a certified Gottman therapist and one of the experienced marriage counsellors in Delhi and across India.

What Makes a Pop-Up Wedding So Different from a Traditional Ceremony?

A pop-up wedding is typically a pre-arranged event organised by a planner or a wedding service provider where multiple couples can book a time slot on the same day or within a short window. Everything—from the venue and décor to the officiant and photographer—is already set up. Couples simply “show up,” get married, and enjoy a beautifully curated experience without the burden of handling every tiny detail themselves.

Couples counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo says, “Love doesn’t need grandeur or endless planning to be unforgettable; sometimes, the simplest, most intentional moments create the deepest memories and the most meaningful beginnings of a lifelong journey together.”

Effortless Planning with Pre-Arranged Details

One of the biggest advantages of a pop-up wedding is the ease of planning. Traditional weddings often require months of coordination involving vendors, venues, catering, and countless decisions. In contrast, pop-up weddings come with a ready-made setup. The couple selects a package, chooses a time slot, and the rest is taken care of. This approach eliminates decision fatigue and allows couples to focus more on the emotional aspect rather than logistics.

Budget-Friendly Without Compromising Elegance

Weddings can quickly become expensive, especially when trying to meet societal expectations. Pop-up weddings offer a cost-effective solution because resources are shared among multiple couples. Despite the lower cost, these events are thoughtfully designed, often featuring elegant décor, professional photography, and charming venues. The result is a stylish yet affordable celebration that doesn’t feel like a compromise.

Intimate and Meaningful Atmosphere

Large weddings can sometimes feel overwhelming, both for the couple and the guests. Pop-up weddings, on the other hand, are intentionally small and intimate. With a limited number of attendees, the focus remains on genuine connections and meaningful moments. Couples often find that this setting allows them to be more present, making the ceremony feel more personal and emotionally fulfilling.

Perfect for Modern, Busy Lifestyles

In today’s fast-paced world, not everyone has the time or energy to plan a traditional wedding. Many couples are balancing careers, personal commitments, and other responsibilities. A pop-up wedding fits seamlessly into such lifestyles by offering a quick, organised, and hassle-free option. It’s ideal for those who want a beautiful wedding without putting their lives on hold for months.

Flexibility with a Touch of Spontaneity

Another appealing aspect of pop-up weddings is their flexibility. Some couples use them as a primary wedding event, while others treat them as a legal ceremony before hosting a larger reception later. There’s also an element of spontaneity that adds excitement—some couples decide on short notice and still manage to have a stunning celebration. This blend of structure and freedom makes the experience unique.

Focus on Experience Rather Than Extravagance

Pop-up weddings shift the emphasis from extravagance to experience. Instead of worrying about impressing a large crowd, couples can invest their energy in enjoying the moment. Whether it’s exchanging vows in a beautifully styled setting or capturing candid memories, the experience feels authentic and less performative.

Pop-Up Wedding vs Traditional Wedding

Aspect	Pop-Up Wedding	Traditional Wedding
Planning & Effort	Pre-arranged, minimal involvement	Extensive planning and coordination
Cost & Budget	Affordable with shared resources	Expensive with individual arrangements
Guest Experience	Intimate and limited attendees	Large gatherings with many guests
Overall Focus	Meaningful, simple, experience-driven	Grand, elaborate, and event-focused

In essence, a pop-up wedding reflects a broader cultural shift toward simplicity and intentional living. It proves that a wedding doesn’t need to be grand to be memorable. By removing the stress and focusing on what truly matters, couples can start their journey together in a way that feels genuine, joyful, and deeply personal.

Summery

• Hunter-style love focuses on actions over words in expressing affection.

• Hunter style gestures value thoughtfulness over expensive gifts

• Hunter style consistency in daily care builds emotional security

Written by Shivani Misri Sadhoo | 17+ Years Experience Certified EFT, CBT, DBT Therapist | Gottman Recommended Indian Marriage Counsellor | Clinical Psychologist at IBS Hospital

If you have just gotten used to terms like breadcrumbing, ghosting, situationships, wokefishing, orbiting, and other confusing modern dating trends, then get ready for the newest addition to the relationship dictionary. It’s called hunter style lovers, and it is currently gaining attention on Chinese social media.

The name may sound a little unusual at first. It might even create the impression that someone is “hunting” for love. In reality, the concept is far gentler. Hunter-style love focuses on small, thoughtful, and consistent actions that show care and attentiveness in everyday life.

In a time when relationships are often measured by grand romantic gestures, expensive gifts, or Instagram-worthy surprises, hunter-style love brings the focus back to simplicity. Instead of dramatic displays, it values small daily expressions of affection that quietly strengthen emotional bonds.

You may be curious to understand this dating trend better. Shivani Misri Sadhoo, who is an experienced relationship and couples therapist in Delhi, explains this meaningful way of expressing love through thoughtful gestures that may seem small but carry deep emotional value.

What Is Hunter Style Lover’s Dating Style All About?

The hunter-style dating approach focuses on showing love through actions rather than words. Saying “I love you” frequently is meaningful, but this style believes actions can often communicate feelings more clearly.

In this trend, partners express affection through simple daily gestures. It might be bringing home a snack that your partner likes, picking up a flower during a walk, or remembering something your partner casually mentioned. These gestures may appear small, but they demonstrate attentiveness and care.

The “gift” in this style does not need to be expensive. The emotional intention behind it matters far more than the price. A simple object, a thoughtful note, or even helping with a daily task can become a meaningful symbol of affection.

Shivani Misri Sadhoo says that “True love is often expressed not through grand gestures, but through the small, consistent acts of care that quietly strengthen a relationship.”

Another important aspect of this dating style is emotional consistency. Instead of intense passion followed by emotional distance, hunter-style love focuses on steady and reliable acts of care. These repeated gestures create a sense of security and trust within the relationship.

Why Has This Dating Style Become So Popular?

The growing popularity of hunter-style love reflects changing attitudes toward modern relationships. In the age of social media, romance is often displayed publicly through curated photographs, elaborate dates, or expensive gifts. While visually appealing, such gestures can sometimes feel performative rather than deeply personal.

Hunter-style love offers a quiet alternative. It emphasizes sincerity and genuine emotional investment instead of public displays of affection. Small gestures that occur in everyday life feel more authentic because they are meant for the partner, not an online audience.

Another reason for its popularity is that it highlights attentiveness. Bringing a favourite snack, remembering small preferences, or helping solve a daily problem shows care in a practical way. These gestures demonstrate that a partner is truly paying attention.

Psychologists also point out that consistent small acts of care strengthen emotional security. When partners repeatedly show reliability through actions, it creates reassurance and stability. This sense of emotional safety often becomes more valuable than dramatic but short-lived displays of romance.

The idea also connects with the East Asian concept of the “nuan nan,” or the warm and considerate partner. However, hunter-style love expands this idea by focusing on practical expressions of care in everyday life. Unlike traditional interpretations, this trend is not limited to any specific gender.

Hunter Style Love vs Performative Modern Dating

Aspect	Hunter Style Love	Performative Modern Dating
Expression of Love	Shown through small, consistent actions	Shown through big gestures and dramatic moments
Focus	Everyday attentiveness and care	Impressing the partner and sometimes the audience
Gifts	Simple, thoughtful items with emotional meaning	Expensive gifts or elaborate surprises
Motivation	Genuine emotional connection	Social validation and appearance
Communication	Actions speak louder than words	Frequent verbal declarations and visible displays
Emotional Impact	Builds long-term trust and stability	May create excitement but can feel superficial
Role of Social Media	Private and personal expressions of love	Often shared publicly for attention
Relationship Style	Consistent, reliable, and practical	Intense but sometimes short-lived

Is Hunter Style Love Healthier for Modern Relationships?

Many relationship experts believe that hunter-style love can support healthier emotional connections. Consistent small gestures create a feeling of reliability and attentiveness that helps partners feel valued.

Rather than relying on dramatic moments of affection, this style encourages everyday acts of kindness and support. Over time, these gestures build trust, emotional security, and a deeper sense of connection between partners.

The hunter-style dating trend reflects a growing desire for authenticity in relationships. Instead of dramatic gestures designed for public attention, it celebrates small, meaningful acts of care. Remembering a partner’s favourite snack, helping with daily tasks, or bringing home something thoughtful can quietly strengthen emotional bonds. For many people, especially younger generations, these consistent expressions of affection create stability and reassurance. In a world filled with curated romance and social media displays, hunter-style love reminds us that genuine relationships are often built through the smallest acts of care.

Written by Shivani Misri Sadhoo | 17+ Years Experience Certified EFT, CBT, DBT Therapist | Gottman Recommended Indian Marriage Counsellor | Clinical Psychologist at IBS Hospital

In today’s hectic life time often feels like the first casualty. During the honeymoon phase, you had all the time in the world—hours stretched effortlessly. But as routine set in, bills, commitments, and expectations began to consume the day. What once felt expansive now feels compressed, even monotonous. And then, the magic happens. Life surprises you with something tender, transformative—Good News for the family. In this article, I will share how pregnancy can open a new dymenion to your marital life – Shivani

Relationships don’t mature overnight. If you feel that celebrating anniversaries or going for a candlelight dinner is what it takes for a relationship to sustain, then you are highly mistaken. They are built quietly—over shared glances across a crowded room, over whispered apologies after unnecessary arguments, over cups of morning tea taken in comfortable silence. Time is one of the most important ingredients for a happy and healthy relationship.

But, in today’s hectic life, with constant reminders of tasks to be done, deadlines to reach, calls to return, and responsibilities that seem never-ending, time often becomes the first casualty. When couples are in their honeymoon phase of the relationship, they seem to have all the time in the world for each other. Hours stretch effortlessly. But as life slowly settles into routine, things begin to change. Bills, commitments, expectations—each takes a small slice of the day. What once felt expansive now feels compressed. Life somehow becomes monotonous.

And then the magic happens! Life brings something unexpected. Something tender. Something transformative. It’s Good News for the family.

A Pregnancy

Two hearts that had been busy keeping up with life suddenly pause. The air feels different. Time, which once rushed forward impatiently, now seems to slow down. There is a new rhythm in the background—soft, hopeful, full of possibility.

The moment a couple learns about the pregnancy, their world feels very different. The days seem more exciting. The same old morning coffee starts feeling more refreshing.

Shivani Misri Sadhoo, a Gottman-certified couples therapist and an experienced marriage counsellor, explains how pregnancy can rejuvenate a couple’s relationship in this article.

How Does Pregnancy Give Couples a Shared Purpose?

Pregnancy gradually shifts life from two separate routines to one shared journey. As couples prepare for their baby—through doctor visits, planning a nursery, and discussing the future—they begin making decisions together. This shared responsibility strengthens unity, deepens emotional connection, and gently transforms the relationship from “me” into “we.”

Shivani Sadhoo says, “Pregnancy transforms a relationship by turning ‘me’ into ‘we,’ deepening emotional connection, shared purpose, and love as couples prepare to welcome new life together.”

Gives a Common Purpose

From the moment a couple begins preparing for a child, life slowly shifts from two separate routines to one shared journey. The small tasks—doctor visits, planning a nursery, talking about money, imagining the future—create a deeper sense of unity. Instead of drifting in parallel, partners move with purpose. Pregnancy gently transforms “me” into “we,” strengthening connection through a meaningful, shared goal.

Enhances Emotional Connection

Studies reveal that parents-to-be who live together often share similar levels of oxytocin—the “love hormone”—which helps them think and feel like a true parenting team. This hormone deepens trust, warmth, and empathy between them. Conversations naturally shift to their baby—their dreams, hopes, and shared future—bringing them closer and strengthening their bond as they step into parenthood together.

Sense of Responsibility Increases

A sense of responsibility deepens when pregnancy sets in, and with it comes a beautiful shift in how a couple sees each other. The little life on the way gently pulls them closer, reminding them that they are a team now, building something greater than themselves. Shared decisions, quiet worries, hopeful dreams—all become mutual. This growing awareness strengthens trust, softens differences, and renews commitment.

Involvement Strengthens Bonds

Couples grow closer when they begin talking about their baby, because in those conversations, they rediscover each other. Planning names, imagining tiny hands, and dreaming about the future gently pull them out of life’s dull routine and back into shared wonder. The laughter returns, the quiet talks last longer, and simple moments feel meaningful again.

The Transformation Helps

Being a parent is not just about gaining a new name; it is about the quiet transformation of who we are and who we are becoming together. Pregnancy quietly draws couples out of the mundane routines of life and into meaningful conversations about their dreams, their childhoods, their values, and the home they wish to create for their new baby.

Know Each Other Better

Pregnancy is a beautiful mix of highs and lows, and in walking through it together, couples often rediscover each other in the most heartfelt ways. The shared excitement, the quiet worries, the late-night talks, and the tiny milestones bring them closer, reminding them why they chose one another in the first place.

You could be a couple who feels life has become routine, but pregnancy can softly change that. It gives you a shared purpose, a deeper understanding, and a stronger responsibility. As you prepare for your baby, you talk more, care more, and stand closer, rebuilding love with patience, warmth, and togetherness again.

In conversations about personality and emotional health, most people are familiar with terms like narcissism or people-pleasing. Yet there is another, quieter pattern that often goes unnoticed—echoism. It doesn’t show up as loud self-importance or dramatic behaviour. Instead, it hides behind excessive humility, silence, and self-minimisation. Understanding echoism can help you recognise whether you are genuinely kind—or unintentionally erasing yourself. Let us find out from Shivani Misri Sadhoo, an experienced couples therapist and relationship counsellor.

Who Is an Echoist?

An echoist is a person who fears appearing self-centred and therefore suppresses their own needs, opinions, and achievements. The concept was popularised by psychologist Craig Malkin, inspired by the Greek myth of Echo, a figure who could only repeat others’ words and gradually lost her own voice.

In psychological terms, echoism is often described as a personality pattern at the opposite extreme of narcissism. While narcissistic individuals seek admiration and attention, echoists feel deeply uncomfortable receiving attention. They tend to:

• Downplay accomplishments
• Avoid expressing strong preferences
• Feel guilty asking for help
• Stay silent to prevent conflict
• Struggle to assert personal boundaries

An echoist is not simply shy or introverted. The defining trait is the anxiety around taking up space—emotionally or socially. They may believe that having needs makes them selfish, so they minimise themselves to feel safe.

What Is Echoism in Simple Terms?

Echoism is a coping style where a person consistently puts others’ emotional experiences ahead of their own, to the point of self-neglect. It often develops as a protective strategy in environments where attention leads to criticism, rejection, or overshadowing by dominant personalities.

Over time, the individual learns that being “low maintenance” feels safer than being expressive. They may pride themselves on not needing much, but internally, they might feel unseen or unheard.

How Is Echoism Different from People-Pleasing?

At first glance, echoism and people-pleasing appear similar because both involve prioritising others. However, their motivations differ.

People-pleasers generally seek approval. They want to be liked, valued, and appreciated. They may say yes to everything, avoid disagreement, and overcommit—but they still hope their efforts are noticed.

Echoists, in contrast, do not want attention. They do not crave validation. In fact, praise can make them uncomfortable. Instead of wanting recognition, they prefer to stay in the background. Their focus is not on gaining approval but on avoiding appearing demanding or self-focused.

Another difference lies in self-awareness. People-pleasers usually know what they want but suppress it to maintain harmony. Echoists may become so disconnected from their own desires that identifying them becomes difficult.

Emotional Effects of Being an Echoist

Echoism can quietly impact self-esteem and relationships. When someone repeatedly silences their own needs, emotional exhaustion can build. They may feel invisible in friendships or romantic partnerships, especially if paired with dominant personalities.

Over time, this dynamic can lead to anxiety, suppressed resentment, and difficulty making decisions. Because echoists rarely assert themselves, others may assume they are always content—even when they are not. The real cost of echoism is not kindness; it is self-erasure.

Can an Echoist Change?

Echoism is not a permanent personality label. It is a learned pattern—and learned patterns can shift. Growth begins with recognizing that having needs does not equal selfishness.

Developing balance involves practicing small acts of self-expression, accepting compliments without dismissing them, and slowly building comfort with being seen. The goal is not to become attention-seeking but to allow yourself equal emotional space in relationships.

So, who is an echoist? An echoist is someone who minimizes themselves out of fear of being “too much.” Unlike a people-pleaser who seeks approval, an echoist seeks invisibility. While this pattern may once have served as protection, in adulthood, it can limit connection and fulfillment.

Healthy emotional living is not about dominating others or disappearing for them. It is about existing fully—without apology.

We live in an era where relationships are no longer confined to traditional definitions. Love, commitment, and companionship have taken on various forms, often influenced by social media, dating apps, and evolving societal norms.

From situationships to ghosting, breadcrumbing to benching, modern relationship dynamics have become increasingly intricate. The once-clear distinction between casual and serious commitments has blurred, making many wonder: Are people afraid of long-term relationships? Can there be a relationship devoid of emotions?

If you’ve ever pondered whether such a connection is possible, psychologist and eminent relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo sheds light on the concept of no-strings-attached (NSA) relationships and what they truly entail. 

What does No Strings Attached mean?

A “no strings attached” (NSA) relationship is all about passion without the weight of commitment. Whether romantic, sexual, or business-related, it thrives on mutual consent, freedom, and zero expectations. Think of it as an endless honeymoon phase—carefree, fun, and pressure-free—where no one anticipates a fairytale ending, just the joy of the moment.

What is the Psychology behind No Strings Attached?

The psychological factors that probably contribute to NSA are:

• Avoiding Emotional Vulnerability: Setting clear boundaries helps individuals protect themselves from potential hurt or disappointment if feelings develop.

• Freedom and Exploration: Allows both partners to experiment with different sexual dynamics and desires without the pressure of commitment.

• Emotional Independence: Ideal for those prioritizing personal growth or busy lifestyles, as it offers emotional freedom without the responsibilities of a committed relationship.

• Managing Expectations: Clearly defining the relationship as “no strings attached” minimizes misunderstandings about commitment levels.

• Individualistic Focus: Encourages prioritizing personal needs and desires over a partner’s, emphasizing personal agency and freedom.

• Exploration and Sexual Satisfaction: Provides a safe space to explore physical desires, experiment with preferences, and boosts sexual confidence.

What do You Gain in No Strings Attached?

1. No Need To Commit – If you are someone who isn’t ready to settle down, an NSA relationship can be ideal. With no pressure to commit, it offers convenience, freedom, and enjoyment without relationship-based responsibilities. There’s no exclusivity unless agreed upon, allowing individuals to engage with multiple partners. It’s a carefree way to explore connections without long-term obligations or vows.

2. Time is not a Constraint – In today’s fast-paced world, time is a luxury. An NSA (No Strings Attached) relationship offers the advantage of flexibility, allowing individuals to connect without the pressure of strict schedules or long-term commitments. Unlike traditional relationships, NSA interactions fit seamlessly into busy lifestyles, ensuring enjoyment without overwhelming obligations. With no need to coordinate availability, partners can focus on shared moments without sacrificing personal or professional priorities.

3. Self-Exploration – It helps you explore different relationship dynamics without commitment, giving insight into what you truly value in a partner. By experiencing various interactions, you become aware of traits you appreciate and those you cannot tolerate. This freedom boosts confidence, enhances communication, and allows self-discovery. A no-strings-attached arrangement helps you assess what works for you, ensuring you make informed choices when seeking a meaningful future relationship.

What Do We Lose?

1. Emotional Turmoil – The biggest drawback of an NSA relationship is the risk of emotional pain. When feelings get involved, someone often ends up hurt, feeling used or unvalued. If one partner develops deeper emotions while the other doesn’t, it leads to heartbreak. Though NSA relationships start with no expectations, they can still result in conflict and painful endings, making emotional detachment difficult in the long run.

2. Low Self-esteem – A “No Strings Attached” (NSA) relationship can negatively impact self-confidence by causing emotional detachment and feelings of being “used.” The lack of commitment may lead to anxiety, rejection fears, and self-doubt, especially if one person develops deeper feelings. Studies link casual sex to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. While NSA can boost confidence temporarily, it often undermines self-worth in the long run.

3. Negative Impact on Mental and Physical Health -Casual relationships might seem risk-free, but they come with hidden health risks. Without commitment or accountability, the chances of STIs increase due to a lack of exclusivity. Another overlooked aspect is sexual aftercare—emotional and physical support after intimacy. In committed relationships, partners naturally care for each other’s well-being, but in casual encounters, this essential care is often missing, affecting both physical and emotional health.

In a nutshell, NSA relationships offer freedom, excitement, and self-exploration without the weight of commitment. However, they come with emotional risks, potential self-esteem issues, and health concerns. While they suit some, they may not be for everyone. Understanding personal boundaries and expectations is key to making informed choices in modern relationship dynamics.

Life is a journey, and every journey is bound to encounter detours, bumps, and wrong turns. Our past mistakes often feel like heavy chains, weighing us down, and holding us back from moving forward. But what if you could break free from these chains and start anew?

What are some of the ways to break free from the chains of past mistakes?

Let Shivani Misri Sadhoo, India’s leading relationship expert and couples counsellor be your guide in this transformative process as she explains the process.

Acknowledge and Accept

The first step to breaking free is acknowledging your mistakes. Denial only prolongs the pain and leaves you stuck in a loop of regret. Take a moment to reflect on your past actions. Ask yourself: What went wrong? What could I have done differently? Self-awareness is key, but it must be paired with self-acceptance. Remember, mistakes are part of being human—they shape who we are and help us grow.

Forgive Yourself

Forgiveness is a powerful tool for liberation. Often, we hold ourselves hostage to guilt, replaying our errors like a broken record. To move forward, you need to forgive yourself. Self-compassion is not about excusing your actions but about understanding that you are a work in progress. Write a letter to yourself, acknowledging the mistake, expressing regret, and affirming your commitment to learn and improve.

Learn the Lesson

Every mistake carries a lesson waiting to be learned. Instead of dwelling on the error, focus on what it has taught you. Perhaps it revealed a blind spot in your behaviour, highlighted a toxic pattern or showed you the value of patience. Mistakes are life’s greatest teachers. Extract the wisdom they offer, and use it as fuel to propel yourself forward.

Let Go of the Past

Letting go is easier said than done, but it is essential for healing. Holding onto the past is like dragging an anchor—your future cannot thrive while you’re rooted in regret. Engage in practices like mindfulness or meditation to focus on the present. Visualize yourself cutting the chains of your past mistakes and walking into a brighter future.

Take Action Toward Growth

Breaking free from past mistakes isn’t just about reflection; it’s about taking proactive steps to grow. If your mistake hurt someone, apologize and make amends. If it was a professional error, seek opportunities to upskill. Forward motion is key. Start small, set achievable goals, and celebrate your progress.

Surround Yourself with Support

No one breaks free alone. Seek guidance from a trusted friend, family member, or mentor who can guide you toward self-discovery. Sharing your journey with others can lighten the load and provide new perspectives.

The Power of Renewal

Mistakes do not define you; how you respond to them does. Life’s greatest transformations often emerge from its darkest moments. By acknowledging, forgiving, and learning, you can break free from the chains of your past and step into a future filled with possibility.

Your past is just a chapter—not the whole story. Embrace the journey of growth and allow yourself the freedom to begin again.

Humans are emotional beings who always crave love, care, respect, and support.

Friends and family are important, but you all yearn to have that special someone in your life who would love you unconditionally and be by your side, no matter what goes wrong.

The support of your partner in the lowest moments can help you boost your confidence to another level. However, arduous a situation is, a supportive partner’s presence can make you believe that everything will be alright.

Being a supportive partner feels like an essential part of a relationship, but some people might not know the best methods to be a supportive husband, wife, or significant other.

There are different types of support in a relationship, as well as several vital reasons for supporting your partner or significant other, says Shivani.

What does it actually mean to be a supportive partner?

There is no clear example of what it means to be a supportive partner. The idea of being supportive that holds for you may or may not work for another.

Eventually, having a supportive partner means that your needs, and desires are met in the relationship, whatever these could be.

One method to know you have a supportive spouse or that you are supportive in a relationship is to look at the idea of choice. Here they are:

•        A supportive partner lets their significant other make choices
•        A supportive partner is the one who is encouraging
•        Supportive partner also means making your significant other feel important and respected

Being supportive in a relationship is quite vital because it is one of the most important aspects of developing a relationship. Having a supportive partner lets a person cope with challenges in life. While also having a partner who supports your dreams allows you to become the finest version of yourself.

What are the signs of a supportive partner?

Supporting a partner may look different in every relationship, but there are some subtle and strong signs that prove one is a supportive wife or a husband.

•        Being a good listener
•        Displaying consideration for your spouse
•        Taking time to laugh with your partner
•        Paying attention to your spouse
•        Being helpful
•        Having the ability to apologize
•        Being honest
•        Viewing your spouse as your teammate

Now you get some ideas that signify a supportive partner, here in this blog leading couple’s therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo in Delhi and Gurgaon shares steps that one needs to take to be a supportive partner.

Make a commitment to truly listen to your spouse

Active listening is important for the well functioning of an intimate relationship. Responsive listening needs you to be actively interested and participate in the conversation. You can do them by taking some time to ask questions and post-listening to them so that you can actually understand your partner’s views.

Be empathetic

It needs you to place yourself in your spouse’s shoes. For example, if your partner is venting about a bad day at work, just think about how you may have felt if you had an issue at the workplace with a co-worker and wanted to talk about it to someone.

Communicate to your spouse often that you two are a team

When things get difficult, be certain to communicate to your spouse that you two are a team and a union. Express that you wish to remain supportive of each other.

Give time to discuss your partner’s dreams and aspirations

Take some time to sit with your partner and talk about their dreams, hopes, goals, and aspirations. It shows your partner that you support them in growing and becoming the best version of themselves.

Provide your partner some time to cool off or relax by themselves

If your partner comes home from work and appears stressed or just not in the mood to talk, recognize the fact and provide them some alone time to unwind, by not taking it personally.

Appreciate your spouse

From time to time praise your partner for their accomplishments and let them know that you appreciate the things they do for you.

Practice little, thoughtful acts

You can practice small and thoughtful acts. Like doing the extra household chores which are usually done by your partner daily or if you are going out take out your partner’s car to fill the fuel or take it to the car wash.

Avoid talking to your spouse out of their feelings

You might be uncomfortable with your partner’s unpleasant emotions but telling them not to be upset could go a long way and make them feel unsupported.

Let your partner do the things their own way

Your partner may occasionally do something different from what you do, but by chastising them, you only show a lack of support. So, rather than criticizing or correcting them simply accept the way they do things.