Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

We live in an era where relationships are no longer confined to traditional definitions. Love, commitment, and companionship have taken on various forms, often influenced by social media, dating apps, and evolving societal norms.

From situationships to ghosting, breadcrumbing to benching, modern relationship dynamics have become increasingly intricate. The once-clear distinction between casual and serious commitments has blurred, making many wonder: Are people afraid of long-term relationships? Can there be a relationship devoid of emotions?

If you’ve ever pondered whether such a connection is possible, psychologist and eminent relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo sheds light on the concept of no-strings-attached (NSA) relationships and what they truly entail. 

What does No Strings Attached mean?

A “no strings attached” (NSA) relationship is all about passion without the weight of commitment. Whether romantic, sexual, or business-related, it thrives on mutual consent, freedom, and zero expectations. Think of it as an endless honeymoon phase—carefree, fun, and pressure-free—where no one anticipates a fairytale ending, just the joy of the moment.

What is the Psychology behind No Strings Attached?

The psychological factors that probably contribute to NSA are:

• Avoiding Emotional Vulnerability: Setting clear boundaries helps individuals protect themselves from potential hurt or disappointment if feelings develop.

• Freedom and Exploration: Allows both partners to experiment with different sexual dynamics and desires without the pressure of commitment.

• Emotional Independence: Ideal for those prioritizing personal growth or busy lifestyles, as it offers emotional freedom without the responsibilities of a committed relationship.

• Managing Expectations: Clearly defining the relationship as “no strings attached” minimizes misunderstandings about commitment levels.

• Individualistic Focus: Encourages prioritizing personal needs and desires over a partner’s, emphasizing personal agency and freedom.

• Exploration and Sexual Satisfaction: Provides a safe space to explore physical desires, experiment with preferences, and boosts sexual confidence.

What do You Gain in No Strings Attached?

1. No Need To Commit – If you are someone who isn’t ready to settle down, an NSA relationship can be ideal. With no pressure to commit, it offers convenience, freedom, and enjoyment without relationship-based responsibilities. There’s no exclusivity unless agreed upon, allowing individuals to engage with multiple partners. It’s a carefree way to explore connections without long-term obligations or vows.

2. Time is not a Constraint – In today’s fast-paced world, time is a luxury. An NSA (No Strings Attached) relationship offers the advantage of flexibility, allowing individuals to connect without the pressure of strict schedules or long-term commitments. Unlike traditional relationships, NSA interactions fit seamlessly into busy lifestyles, ensuring enjoyment without overwhelming obligations. With no need to coordinate availability, partners can focus on shared moments without sacrificing personal or professional priorities.

3. Self-Exploration – It helps you explore different relationship dynamics without commitment, giving insight into what you truly value in a partner. By experiencing various interactions, you become aware of traits you appreciate and those you cannot tolerate. This freedom boosts confidence, enhances communication, and allows self-discovery. A no-strings-attached arrangement helps you assess what works for you, ensuring you make informed choices when seeking a meaningful future relationship.

What Do We Lose?

1. Emotional Turmoil – The biggest drawback of an NSA relationship is the risk of emotional pain. When feelings get involved, someone often ends up hurt, feeling used or unvalued. If one partner develops deeper emotions while the other doesn’t, it leads to heartbreak. Though NSA relationships start with no expectations, they can still result in conflict and painful endings, making emotional detachment difficult in the long run.

2. Low Self-esteem – A “No Strings Attached” (NSA) relationship can negatively impact self-confidence by causing emotional detachment and feelings of being “used.” The lack of commitment may lead to anxiety, rejection fears, and self-doubt, especially if one person develops deeper feelings. Studies link casual sex to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. While NSA can boost confidence temporarily, it often undermines self-worth in the long run.

3. Negative Impact on Mental and Physical Health -Casual relationships might seem risk-free, but they come with hidden health risks. Without commitment or accountability, the chances of STIs increase due to a lack of exclusivity. Another overlooked aspect is sexual aftercare—emotional and physical support after intimacy. In committed relationships, partners naturally care for each other’s well-being, but in casual encounters, this essential care is often missing, affecting both physical and emotional health.

In a nutshell, NSA relationships offer freedom, excitement, and self-exploration without the weight of commitment. However, they come with emotional risks, potential self-esteem issues, and health concerns. While they suit some, they may not be for everyone. Understanding personal boundaries and expectations is key to making informed choices in modern relationship dynamics.

Life is a journey, and every journey is bound to encounter detours, bumps, and wrong turns. Our past mistakes often feel like heavy chains, weighing us down, and holding us back from moving forward. But what if you could break free from these chains and start anew?

What are some of the ways to break free from the chains of past mistakes?

Let Shivani Misri Sadhoo, India’s leading relationship expert and couples counsellor be your guide in this transformative process as she explains the process.

Acknowledge and Accept

The first step to breaking free is acknowledging your mistakes. Denial only prolongs the pain and leaves you stuck in a loop of regret. Take a moment to reflect on your past actions. Ask yourself: What went wrong? What could I have done differently? Self-awareness is key, but it must be paired with self-acceptance. Remember, mistakes are part of being human—they shape who we are and help us grow.

Forgive Yourself

Forgiveness is a powerful tool for liberation. Often, we hold ourselves hostage to guilt, replaying our errors like a broken record. To move forward, you need to forgive yourself. Self-compassion is not about excusing your actions but about understanding that you are a work in progress. Write a letter to yourself, acknowledging the mistake, expressing regret, and affirming your commitment to learn and improve.

Learn the Lesson

Every mistake carries a lesson waiting to be learned. Instead of dwelling on the error, focus on what it has taught you. Perhaps it revealed a blind spot in your behaviour, highlighted a toxic pattern or showed you the value of patience. Mistakes are life’s greatest teachers. Extract the wisdom they offer, and use it as fuel to propel yourself forward.

Let Go of the Past

Letting go is easier said than done, but it is essential for healing. Holding onto the past is like dragging an anchor—your future cannot thrive while you’re rooted in regret. Engage in practices like mindfulness or meditation to focus on the present. Visualize yourself cutting the chains of your past mistakes and walking into a brighter future.

Take Action Toward Growth

Breaking free from past mistakes isn’t just about reflection; it’s about taking proactive steps to grow. If your mistake hurt someone, apologize and make amends. If it was a professional error, seek opportunities to upskill. Forward motion is key. Start small, set achievable goals, and celebrate your progress.

Surround Yourself with Support

No one breaks free alone. Seek guidance from a trusted friend, family member, or mentor who can guide you toward self-discovery. Sharing your journey with others can lighten the load and provide new perspectives.

The Power of Renewal

Mistakes do not define you; how you respond to them does. Life’s greatest transformations often emerge from its darkest moments. By acknowledging, forgiving, and learning, you can break free from the chains of your past and step into a future filled with possibility.

Your past is just a chapter—not the whole story. Embrace the journey of growth and allow yourself the freedom to begin again.

Humans are emotional beings who always crave love, care, respect, and support.

Friends and family are important, but you all yearn to have that special someone in your life who would love you unconditionally and be by your side, no matter what goes wrong.

The support of your partner in the lowest moments can help you boost your confidence to another level. However, arduous a situation is, a supportive partner’s presence can make you believe that everything will be alright.

Being a supportive partner feels like an essential part of a relationship, but some people might not know the best methods to be a supportive husband, wife, or significant other.

There are different types of support in a relationship, as well as several vital reasons for supporting your partner or significant other, says Shivani.

What does it actually mean to be a supportive partner?

There is no clear example of what it means to be a supportive partner. The idea of being supportive that holds for you may or may not work for another.

Eventually, having a supportive partner means that your needs, and desires are met in the relationship, whatever these could be.

One method to know you have a supportive spouse or that you are supportive in a relationship is to look at the idea of choice. Here they are:

•        A supportive partner lets their significant other make choices
•        A supportive partner is the one who is encouraging
•        Supportive partner also means making your significant other feel important and respected

Being supportive in a relationship is quite vital because it is one of the most important aspects of developing a relationship. Having a supportive partner lets a person cope with challenges in life. While also having a partner who supports your dreams allows you to become the finest version of yourself.

What are the signs of a supportive partner?

Supporting a partner may look different in every relationship, but there are some subtle and strong signs that prove one is a supportive wife or a husband.

•        Being a good listener
•        Displaying consideration for your spouse
•        Taking time to laugh with your partner
•        Paying attention to your spouse
•        Being helpful
•        Having the ability to apologize
•        Being honest
•        Viewing your spouse as your teammate

Now you get some ideas that signify a supportive partner, here in this blog leading couple’s therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo in Delhi and Gurgaon shares steps that one needs to take to be a supportive partner.

Make a commitment to truly listen to your spouse

Active listening is important for the well functioning of an intimate relationship. Responsive listening needs you to be actively interested and participate in the conversation. You can do them by taking some time to ask questions and post-listening to them so that you can actually understand your partner’s views.

Be empathetic

It needs you to place yourself in your spouse’s shoes. For example, if your partner is venting about a bad day at work, just think about how you may have felt if you had an issue at the workplace with a co-worker and wanted to talk about it to someone.

Communicate to your spouse often that you two are a team

When things get difficult, be certain to communicate to your spouse that you two are a team and a union. Express that you wish to remain supportive of each other.

Give time to discuss your partner’s dreams and aspirations

Take some time to sit with your partner and talk about their dreams, hopes, goals, and aspirations. It shows your partner that you support them in growing and becoming the best version of themselves.

Provide your partner some time to cool off or relax by themselves

If your partner comes home from work and appears stressed or just not in the mood to talk, recognize the fact and provide them some alone time to unwind, by not taking it personally.

Appreciate your spouse

From time to time praise your partner for their accomplishments and let them know that you appreciate the things they do for you.

Practice little, thoughtful acts

You can practice small and thoughtful acts. Like doing the extra household chores which are usually done by your partner daily or if you are going out take out your partner’s car to fill the fuel or take it to the car wash.

Avoid talking to your spouse out of their feelings

You might be uncomfortable with your partner’s unpleasant emotions but telling them not to be upset could go a long way and make them feel unsupported.

Let your partner do the things their own way

Your partner may occasionally do something different from what you do, but by chastising them, you only show a lack of support. So, rather than criticizing or correcting them simply accept the way they do things.