Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

We live in an era where boys and girls fall in love quickly—and drift apart just as easily. Whether you are in a situationship, where you are still in the friendship zone, and not yet a couple, or a texlationship, which is based primarily on texting with little to no real-life interaction, modern relationships are undeniably volatile.

With the advent of social media, true emotions are hard to decipher. We often wonder if in this age of interconnectedness, we have actually become more disconnected. Amid the noise of notifications and filtered personas, have we lost the warmth of genuine human connection? Shivani Misri Sadhoo, a relationship expert and certified relationship counsellor, tells her readers what being in a relationship truly means.

In simple words, the term ‘relationship’ refers to the connection or bond between two or more people. When a couple is in a relationship, they are emotionally attached to each other. Leading marriage counsellor in India, Shivani Misri Sadhoo, explains the real meaning of relationship in this blog.

What is The Real Meaning of Being in A Relationship?

To have Faith

Yes, perhaps the ubiquitous truth—faith or trust is the basic foundation of any healthy relationship. If you are in a relationship with someone, the ability to believe in them, the way they behave and their intentions is vital. Faith means giving someone the benefit of the doubt, even when circumstances test your patience.

It’s knowing that your partner has your best interests at heart, even when times are tough. Without faith, insecurity creeps in, and love slowly erodes. It’s not only about trusting that your partner would choose fidelity over betrayal, but also trusting that they will show up for you emotionally, be honest with their feelings, and stand by your side through life’s unpredictability.

To Understand Each Other

Love is not the only glue that holds a relationship together. Mutual understanding is very important. Partners need to understand each other. Sometimes silence speaks louder than words. A couple should be able to understand each other’s feelings and emotions without always having to explain them.

To understand someone is to be aware of their feelings, to have empathy, and to genuinely care about their inner world. Studies reveal that most of the relationships crumble not because couples fall out of love, but because there is a lack of proper understanding and communication.

To Not Judge Each Other

Another very important aspect in a relationship is not to judge each other. Many a time, even if the partners know each other well, it’s easy to fall into the trap of making assumptions or passing judgments, especially during moments of stress or disagreement. When one partner feels judged, it can lead to defensiveness, withdrawal, or even resentment.

Instead, couples should sit together and sort out their misunderstandings with patience, empathy and open communication. The moment you start judging each other over trivial issues, the trust that has been built over time can begin to erode.

To Stand by Each Other

In a true relationship, partners should always stand by each other, irrespective of the situation. One cannot always predict the challenges life will throw their way, but unconditional support, empathy, and commitment help couples endure and grow stronger.

It doesn’t really matter what the issue is; the most important thing is to be with your significant other when they need you the most. It is not only about celebrating the joys – it’s also about weathering the storms together.

To be friends first

If you want a fulfilling relationship, a true relationship, then be a friend to your partner. Friendship is perhaps the most important ingredient of a successful relationship. Friends understand each other, accept each other the way they are and do not judge. It’s easy to be swept away by passion or attraction, but those flames alone can flicker and fade.

That is ephemeral. What truly lasts forever is the kind of connection rooted in friendship. When you are a friend to your partner, you forgive each other easily without holding grudges. Communication is candid. There are no ifs and buts.

To Accept Their Imperfections

A relationship becomes meaningful when you accept your partner just the way they are. Nobody is perfect. You may be good at something your partner struggles with, and vice versa. That’s the true meaning of being in a relationship, when you accept each other’s flaws and strengths equally, supporting one another through growth and vulnerability.

When you love someone, you do not try to change them or mold them into someone they are not. Instead, you embrace their imperfections and create a safe space where both of you can be your authentic selves. A meaningful relationship is built on mutual respect, trust, and understanding. It’s not about fixing each other, but about growing together. It’s about being each other’s anchor during the storms and celebrating the sunshine side by side.

Ultimately, being in a relationship means having faith, understanding each other deeply, and accepting one another without judgment. It’s about being true friends, offering unconditional support, and embracing imperfections. A real relationship is built on trust, empathy, and love that grows stronger through every challenge shared together.

Falling in love is a mesmerizing experience—a whirlwind of emotions, deep connection, and unwavering trust. It’s the invisible thread that binds two souls together, creating a foundation of security and intimacy. But what happens when that trust is shattered? The very bedrock of your relationship begins to crack, leaving behind a chasm of pain, confusion, and disillusionment. Betrayal—whether through infidelity, deceit, or hidden truths—can shake a relationship to its core, making it feel as though everything once cherished is now slipping away.

Does this mean the relationship is beyond redemption? Not necessarily. While some choose to walk away, seeing betrayal as an irreparable wound, others see it as an opportunity to rebuild—albeit through a painful and arduous journey. Healing after betrayal is not for the faint-hearted, but for those willing to undertake the challenge, it can be a transformative process that redefines love, trust, and commitment.

Guide – How to regain trust after betrayal? Answers Relationship Expert Shivani Sadhoo shares

If you find yourself standing at this emotional crossroads, unwilling to give up just yet, here are expert-backed strategies from Shivani Misri Sadhoo, India’s top couples and marriage counselor, on how to regain trust after betrayal.

Identify The Root Cause

The first step in rebuilding trust after betrayal is understanding why it happened. Betrayal is painful. No doubt about that. But before deciding to give your partner another chance, you need to figure out what led to it. Did they do it to protect themselves, or was there another reason? Maybe they were trying to shield you from bad news, handle a financial problem, or support a family member. Sometimes, a simple misunderstanding or miscommunication can make matters worse. Thus, it is better to know the cause and then act upon it.

Talk It Out

The next best thing you can do after betrayal is to have a heart-to-heart conversation with your partner. Open and honest communication helps clear misunderstandings, express emotions, and rebuild trust. It creates a safe space where both partners can share their fears and expectations without judgment. The betrayed person should feel free to ask questions, while the betrayer must answer truthfully. Patience is key, and avoiding stonewalling is important. Talking openly helps in healing, strengthens the bond, and paves the way for a hopeful future.

Embrace Empathy

Sometimes, seeing the situation from the other person’s perspective can be tough, but empathy plays a crucial role in rebuilding lost trust. It’s not about excusing betrayal but understanding the deeper reasons behind it, which can aid healing. True empathy goes beyond acknowledging feelings—it requires actively grasping the depth of someone’s pain. The betrayer must do more than apologize; they must offer genuine emotional support. Meanwhile, the betrayed must remain open to understanding, though without justifying the betrayal.

Boundaries are important

In order to rebuild trust after betrayal, setting clear boundaries is essential for both partners. Boundaries create security, allowing the betrayed person to heal while ensuring both individuals understand what is acceptable. These may include transparency about whereabouts, avoiding tempting situations, and reinforcing respect and commitment. Emotional needs, such as space, time, and regular check-ins, should also be addressed. By mutually agreeing on these boundaries, both partners can foster healing, prevent future betrayals, and establish a stronger, more secure relationship.

Forgive, not Forget

Perhaps the most challenging aspect of betrayal is finding the strength to forgive. Yet, forgiveness is essential for healing and rebuilding trust, though it requires genuine remorse and effort from both sides. It’s a conscious decision, not a justification for the betrayal, but a way to release resentment and make space for growth. Holding onto self-blame can trap you in doubt, hindering recovery. Forgiving empowers you to move forward while giving your partner the chance to learn, grow, and restore the relationship.

Consult An Expert

Seeking help from a relationship counselor or therapist can be a wise step in healing after betrayal. Not all relationships must end in heartbreak, and there is no shame in asking for guidance. Therapy provides a neutral space to address emotions, rebuild trust, and develop healthier communication. A trained therapist helps uncover deep-seated wounds, offers coping strategies, and prevents repeating harmful patterns. With the right support, couples can navigate complex emotions, set boundaries, and find a path toward reconciliation and renewed connection.

There is always light at the end of the tunnel if both partners are willing to heal together. Rebuilding trust takes time, honest communication, empathy, clear boundaries, and forgiveness. Seeking expert guidance can further strengthen the journey. With patience and effort, love can be redefined, making the relationship even stronger than before.

We live in an era where relationships are no longer confined to traditional definitions. Love, commitment, and companionship have taken on various forms, often influenced by social media, dating apps, and evolving societal norms.

From situationships to ghosting, breadcrumbing to benching, modern relationship dynamics have become increasingly intricate. The once-clear distinction between casual and serious commitments has blurred, making many wonder: Are people afraid of long-term relationships? Can there be a relationship devoid of emotions?

If you’ve ever pondered whether such a connection is possible, psychologist and eminent relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo sheds light on the concept of no-strings-attached (NSA) relationships and what they truly entail. 

What does No Strings Attached mean?

A “no strings attached” (NSA) relationship is all about passion without the weight of commitment. Whether romantic, sexual, or business-related, it thrives on mutual consent, freedom, and zero expectations. Think of it as an endless honeymoon phase—carefree, fun, and pressure-free—where no one anticipates a fairytale ending, just the joy of the moment.

What is the Psychology behind No Strings Attached?

The psychological factors that probably contribute to NSA are:

• Avoiding Emotional Vulnerability: Setting clear boundaries helps individuals protect themselves from potential hurt or disappointment if feelings develop.

• Freedom and Exploration: Allows both partners to experiment with different sexual dynamics and desires without the pressure of commitment.

• Emotional Independence: Ideal for those prioritizing personal growth or busy lifestyles, as it offers emotional freedom without the responsibilities of a committed relationship.

• Managing Expectations: Clearly defining the relationship as “no strings attached” minimizes misunderstandings about commitment levels.

• Individualistic Focus: Encourages prioritizing personal needs and desires over a partner’s, emphasizing personal agency and freedom.

• Exploration and Sexual Satisfaction: Provides a safe space to explore physical desires, experiment with preferences, and boosts sexual confidence.

What do You Gain in No Strings Attached?

1. No Need To Commit – If you are someone who isn’t ready to settle down, an NSA relationship can be ideal. With no pressure to commit, it offers convenience, freedom, and enjoyment without relationship-based responsibilities. There’s no exclusivity unless agreed upon, allowing individuals to engage with multiple partners. It’s a carefree way to explore connections without long-term obligations or vows.

2. Time is not a Constraint – In today’s fast-paced world, time is a luxury. An NSA (No Strings Attached) relationship offers the advantage of flexibility, allowing individuals to connect without the pressure of strict schedules or long-term commitments. Unlike traditional relationships, NSA interactions fit seamlessly into busy lifestyles, ensuring enjoyment without overwhelming obligations. With no need to coordinate availability, partners can focus on shared moments without sacrificing personal or professional priorities.

3. Self-Exploration – It helps you explore different relationship dynamics without commitment, giving insight into what you truly value in a partner. By experiencing various interactions, you become aware of traits you appreciate and those you cannot tolerate. This freedom boosts confidence, enhances communication, and allows self-discovery. A no-strings-attached arrangement helps you assess what works for you, ensuring you make informed choices when seeking a meaningful future relationship.

What Do We Lose?

1. Emotional Turmoil – The biggest drawback of an NSA relationship is the risk of emotional pain. When feelings get involved, someone often ends up hurt, feeling used or unvalued. If one partner develops deeper emotions while the other doesn’t, it leads to heartbreak. Though NSA relationships start with no expectations, they can still result in conflict and painful endings, making emotional detachment difficult in the long run.

2. Low Self-esteem – A “No Strings Attached” (NSA) relationship can negatively impact self-confidence by causing emotional detachment and feelings of being “used.” The lack of commitment may lead to anxiety, rejection fears, and self-doubt, especially if one person develops deeper feelings. Studies link casual sex to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. While NSA can boost confidence temporarily, it often undermines self-worth in the long run.

3. Negative Impact on Mental and Physical Health -Casual relationships might seem risk-free, but they come with hidden health risks. Without commitment or accountability, the chances of STIs increase due to a lack of exclusivity. Another overlooked aspect is sexual aftercare—emotional and physical support after intimacy. In committed relationships, partners naturally care for each other’s well-being, but in casual encounters, this essential care is often missing, affecting both physical and emotional health.

In a nutshell, NSA relationships offer freedom, excitement, and self-exploration without the weight of commitment. However, they come with emotional risks, potential self-esteem issues, and health concerns. While they suit some, they may not be for everyone. Understanding personal boundaries and expectations is key to making informed choices in modern relationship dynamics.

Dating an independent woman can be an enriching experience, but it also comes with its own set of nuances. So, what exactly do independent women want from men in relationships?

First and foremost, it’s essential to understand who an independent woman is. She’s not just someone who pays her bills or pursues her career goals. An independent woman knows herself deeply, speaks her mind with clarity, and lives authentically according to her values. She doesn’t seek validation or fulfilment from others; instead, she finds it within herself.

What are the things independent women want from men?

Let us learn from leading marriage and relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

Respect

Independent women seek partners who not only recognize but celebrate their autonomy. A secure man values her self-reliance, encouraging her aspirations and respecting her need for space. He engages in constructive dialogue, cherishes her uniqueness, and supports her goals.

Moreover, he values her physical boundaries and emotional well-being, recognizing that true allure lies in his ability to comprehend and connect with her as an individual while acknowledging the unity within their shared journey.

Equality in relationships

An independent woman looks for a partner who is her equal, not her competitor. She believes in sharing responsibilities, making decisions together, and working as a team to build a life. This means both partners pitch in and share the load, creating a balanced and satisfying dynamic.

Equality isn’t just about the basics; it’s about fairness, talking openly, and understanding each other. It’s about seeing and respecting each other’s differences and treating each other’s opinions and contributions with value, regardless of what society says.

Honest communication

Good communication is vital for a healthy relationship. Independent women appreciate partners who are upfront and willing to have deep conversations. She values openness and honesty, so it’s important to be direct and assertive like her.

Don’t shy away from expressing your thoughts and feelings. She wants her partner to be transparent and vulnerable too, as this builds intimacy and strengthens the relationship. So, keep the dialogue open and honest for a deeper connection that grows stronger over time.

Emotional connection

Sometimes, grasping the unspoken nuances becomes crucial. An empowered and self-reliant woman places great value on emotional availability in a relationship. Recognizing the significance of emotional intimacy, she seeks a connection that goes beyond shared interests and physical attraction. Fearless in embracing vulnerability, she desires a partner who shares this openness.

For her, a relationship is a comprehensive bond that involves mutual support and understanding. Even the most self-sufficient woman may, at times, yearn to be vulnerable, allowing her partner to be the pillar of strength.

They want their partners to follow their own dreams too

Independent women seek partners who are strong and self-sufficient. They are drawn to individuals who can handle their own lives without constant support. These women value ambition and expect their partners to have their own aspirations.

Being with someone who is driven not only adds excitement to the relationship but also fosters personal growth and independence. Such partnerships propel both parties toward their dreams and create a supportive environment for mutual success.

Looks for unconditional love

An independent woman values her needs in a relationship. Despite her strength, she desires love, care, and consideration. Like anyone, she seeks a partner who embraces her flaws, celebrates her uniqueness, and stands by her through life’s challenges. Recognize her feelings, be there for her, and show unconditional love for a flourishing relationship.

Now that we’ve explored what independent women expect from their partners—respect, equality, honest communication, emotional connection, and shared dreams—it’s evident that they seek relationships built on mutual understanding and support. These expectations foster strong bonds where both individuals thrive personally and collectively, embracing each other’s autonomy and aspirations.