Tag Archive : relationship blog

7 SIGNS YOU ARE DATING SOMEONE EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE

When a person is said to be emotionally unstable, what it means is that the individual’s reaction to issues is unpredictable. The person’s behavior is a disorder or has an altitudinal defect. It is very difficult to be in a relationship with an emotionally unstable kind of personality and sometimes it also is frustrating. Because you are not able to understand what to do to please or annoy them. Sometime, they may approve or sometimes they react violently to the same thing.

Generally, an angry emotionally unstable partner can be brutal. Emotional instability is different from emotional immaturity. The latter refers to a formative phase in one’s life where one is still discovering oneself. It is usually transitory; it has nothing to do with being immature. It often arises as a result of a fault in upbringing or a personality disorder. Before you get into someone or they get into you, it is usually good to first ascertain their emotional stability. In the current scenario, one of the leading causes of marital and relationship break up is an emotional incompatibility.

In this article, Delhi’s eminent marriage counselor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo talk about 7 signs you are dating someone emotionally unstable.

Impulsive Decisions

In life, at one point everyone has to take impulsive decisions and it doesn’t mean that everyone is unstable. But a person takes a decision which damages their own property because they didn’t take time to think it through, then such kind of person is unstable emotionally. For example, a partner who is into gambling or play without planning of finance is looser always. They may agree to a contract without taking time to thoroughly study and understand its terms and conditions. They only get to regret later when the contract is now taking its effect on them. So, when you are dating take care of their decision. It is going to be up to you to decide whether to continue with them or leave.

Easily Angered

Violent the reaction comes when they get angry because they easily lose their control and injure the valuable property. For a healthy person, they have some limitations of expression of their anger but they don’t have any kind of boundary for anger and this is a serious issue for a healthy relationship when you are going to make.

Hardly Show Emotions

Emotional instability as the expression of extreme negative behavior but there is a subtle symptom of this personality disorder. For example, a normal person would scream at the sight of a horrible scene but an emotionally unstable individual may react differently. Most of the times, if you are walking with such a person, you may constantly see yourself as a fool because the things you would expect them to react to normal, they won’t.

Constantly Get Tired

One may notice symptoms of emotional instability such as being incessant and extreme fatigue. The reason behind emotional disorder is psychological effects. It is the fact that they easily feel fatigued and exhausted without doing any physical exercise. Their mind is always cluttered and full with a lot of negative thoughts and useless thoughts, the brain storage is full & trying to free the mind from such thought. And it might lead to getting weak or stressed out in a short interval of time.

Blame For Their Error

In the case of being unstable emotionally, the person in front of him is always wrong except himself and for this reason, the partner of such kind of personality should be too strong to present their views on the discussion going on. Whenever any misfortune occurs, they start yelling and blaming for the same. Actually, there are times or circumstances when we are not directly responsible for what befalls us and not able to control accordingly

Find Hard To Sleep

Not being able to sleep when required is something anyone can experience who has an emotionally unstable mind. Most of the time, the mind is not at peace which doesn’t let them sleep. For people with unstable emotions, their minds are usually overactive. While they lay on the bed, their minds are usually wondering about frivolous things.

Hard To Forgive

Forgiveness is a thing which directly comes from the heart and a healthy mind can do it. Because in forgiveness first surrender one’s right and then letting go of wrong things. Sometimes they say that they have forgiven but when they go back in the memory and search out the things in their mind then they still carry with them.

5 Essential Tips to Survive Your Spouse’s Midlife Crisis

Often very few people are capable of managing the midlife crisis, learn from it, and move on towards a more fruitful life. There are few who transforms into a smaller form of their personality and impose colossal discomfort on the people around them. Primarily focusing on self and your kids can be understood as the easiest way of surviving your partners midlife crisis.

Even if your spouse handles their midlife crisis without doing much harm or damages to people around, they tend to go through changes of some kind. These alterations may leave you wondering about what could be done to help yourself (and your spouse) in saving your relationship. Surviving your spouse’s midlife crisis is not an easier task but it is workable when you take the right steps.

In this article, Delhi’s top marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo talk about 5 essential tips to survive your spouse’s midlife crisis.

Focusing On Your Children And Self

You aren’t doing any great favors to yourself and your spouse if you are obsessed with what their thinking or actions are. Don’t be too over-possessive. Still, however, you have complete control over the choices you make.

Shift your focus on things that are in your control. No use of overthinking about your spouse’s problems, it’s often that you are filled with negative thoughts in your head. These negative thoughts will eventually impact you and your kids.

It’s best to fill your time with a hobby that will distract you from your spouse’s behaviors during their mid-life crisis. If there is a stressful environment at home, plan for activities for yourself and your children away from that environment. Do take steps that will keep you and your kids from becoming victims during your spouse’s midlife crisis.

Defining Clear Boundaries With Your Spouse

The simplest way to keep your spouse’s ruthless behavior from creating stress in your life is to defining boundaries and sticking to those boundaries with your spouse. In case your spouse is cheating on you, make them realize that this part of their life shouldn’t allow intruding into your life. Simply tell him or her that you don’t want to know anything about their extramarital relationships and tell that you don’t want to be in a conflict or be a part of a love triangle.

There may be an instinct to find out about the other person. Even spying on your spouse, reading their emails, checking their mobile phones and hacking their computers, these tend to be feeding your curiosity to know about them. But the fact is, people going through a midlife crisis, will do what continues with relationships regardless of what your feelings are. Let it go. Let things take up its own course and gracefully accept the fact that you have no control over the situation. Don’t let it hamper your way of living your life.

Channelize Your Anger Towards A Healthy Way

Often Anger could be considered as a normal reaction to your spouse’s midlife crisis, especially when it is adversely affecting you. The anger could be at its optimal, but venting out it will only make you feel better in the short-term. For some, talking things out can help ease their feelings, while others find that it exacerbates the situation. Venting the anger on your spouse spontaneously won’t change his or her behavior, but will lead to more complications in your relationship.

The best way to vent out the anger is to have a non-confrontational approach. Join a gym, throw water balloons against the house walls. Burn the pictures of bad memories and flush out. The approach is to cope up with your anger in a manner that doesn’t involve your spouse. Screaming, cursing, or crying won’t impact your spouse who is going through a midlife crisis.

Don’t Start A Talk On Relationship With Your Spouse

In any relationship, there is an option of discussing relationships & solving every problem mutually. But you’re no longer that couple and you cannot expect your spouse to care about working through your relationship issues.

In place of living in your past relationship sweet memories, pick up new hobbies, focus on your career, or find reasons to be away from your house. Make a habit of prioritizing yourself which can truly help you get healed.

Listen Without Any Judgmental Notions

When your spouse initiates a conversation with you, listen without being too critical. Chances are that your spouse might be experiencing self-doubts and confused about what they are going through, so listening em-pathetically is the key. Any sarcastic comments are to be avoided. It is easier said than done, particularly when they seem to be irrational or are undeserving of your sympathy.

7 WAYS TO NURTURE YOUR RELATIONSHIP

A relationship is an important aspect of human life. The way flower needs rain and sun, similarly, the relationship needs to be nurtured with love and care. A relationship would not survive on its own. It needs nurturing and care of two adults, giving to each other in a manner that creates a mutually beneficial bond.

Renowned relationship expert and marriage Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo says to foster a deep and loving bond you need these 7 ways to nurture your relationship.

1. Constant and Honest Communication:

If you do not talk to your partner the relationship will not survive. The more you communicate, the closer you will become. The communication needs to be constant as this is, the key for a healthy relationship.

2. The Eagerness to work through difficulties and disagreements

Throwing in the towel, even if you do not cross the door, is not the way to happiness. You must face the uncomfortable situation that comes with a difference in opinions and ideas. You need to show the willingness to work out all the questions that pose an unpleasant situation.

3. Sharing Life Lessons with the One You Love

When you discover or experience something about life, or you take a self-correcting step that is good for your relationship, let your partner know the same. You will be amazed by the positive response.

4. A Bit of Humour, Some Fun and Little Distraction from the Rigours Of Daily Life

You should not spend all your free time working on your relationship. Do not make it a hobby. Discuss what you like to do, where you would like to go, and look for how to have fun together. Then get up and do it. A bit of humour and fun will let both of you break the shackles from the daily life hassles.

5. Emotional Support, Acceptance, and Compliments

If you do not feel that your partner likes and respects you, there will not be a strong bond. You have to lift each other up and let each other know the depth of your love and caring. It is important to accept your partner as they are and also, provide them compliments whenever you can.

6. Being Able To Admit Mistake and Discuss Them

We all make mistakes. Isn’t it? By learning to understand it and let go of the mistakes that your partner makes will change your life around and provide you more time to enjoy.

7. Sharing Dreams and Goals That Resonate With Both Of You

You will be happier when you are working toward a goal and achieve that. Always ensure you always have something to look forward to and that you are doing it as a couple.