Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

You mostly tend to strive for the honeymoon phase in relationships, where everything is like fantasy and full of wonders and you just cannot get enough of your partner. And though that phase can feel as pleasurable as you make it out to be, it’s also exactly what you call it a phase.

No relationship will be sunshine and rainbows every day of your life. A relationship is built up of at least 2 people and those people have individual requirements, and at times those needs include being alone. But how accurately do you know if you require space from your partner?

If you cannot make it an hour or two without checking in or asking a question to your partner, you need a break.

It’s completely fine to need space in a relationship. You could be an introvert that needs alone time to rest or you may just like spending time by yourself every once in a while. Needing some time apart does not mean you do not love your partner. It only means you need time to take care of yourself and recharge.

In this article, Delhi’s top Relationship Expert, Marriage Counselor and Founder of Saarthi Counselling Services talk about the signs you need space in your relationship.

You Are Always Bickering With Each Other

If you are continuously arguing over minor things, it could be time to take a break. Sometimes simply changing the pattern of spending so much time together can stop the cycle of bickering.

Try spending a day or weekend apart with your other loved ones. It’s good for the relationship and good for the bickering that is a sign that you need a break.

You Do Not Do Anything Without Telling Your Partner

If you are feeling like you cannot even go buy groceries without giving your partner a heads-up, it is perhaps a sign you need some space. A big sign you require space in a relationship is when you are co-dependent and cannot do anything without letting your partner know or getting your partner’s nod.

Begin out small by taking a break from calling, messaging or emailing each other. Chances are you are trying the above things multiple times. Don’t. Wait until you see each other in person at a given time of the day. Sometimes the 8-hour workday apart is sufficient. Other times you may need more.

The Quirks Are No Longer Quirky

If all the cute and mushy little things your partner does is no cuter to you, then it might be a good idea to spend some time alone. This is a sign you require some space from your partner is if “how they dress, or they talk. If every little thing is bothering you, it’s certain time for a break.

Spending Time Together Is Not As Fun As It Was Once

If you are not having fun in your relationship, some alone time could be necessary. If you are feeling drained after spending time together, again it’s time for some time apart. You likely require some space if your relationship is going through a torrid phase and it feels like every interaction results in a really hard and painful discussion. Being together should not be difficult, but when being together isn’t smooth-sailing, a small-time away from each other may be exactly what you and your partner need.

You Feel Stressed Out

If anything is stressing you out, it could be a good idea to spend some time alone.  Even if the stressor is not coming from your relationship. At times underlying stress or tension can make staying together feel like friction. Thus, it is helpful to check in with yourself and think about whether it is coming from outer stressors like work or family, or if there is something you are wanting in the relationship but not necessarily having.

You Do Not Feel Like Yourself

Needing alone time is never a bad idea. A major sign that you need some time away from your partner is if you’re feeling fatigued, irritable, or simply not yourself. Your spouse will understand if you need some time to take care of yourself and your mental health. “Make this a consistent part of your life so that you can have a good balance of time alone and time with your loved ones.

Needing space from your partner does not mean there is anything ridiculously wrong with your relationship. It’s always fine to give some time to yourself in order to rest, compose, and spend time with other people those you love.   

You have told a woman you like her, but she said stay back because you cannot be a part of her life or cannot be trusted. It hurts. Or maybe your girl says she loves you but will check where you are and whom you are with every possible time and she does not believe the details you share with her, so she spies on you!

It is pretty normal for a woman who has been cheated on in her past relationships to have hard times trusting men again. And, if you are presently in a relationship and your girlfriend has seen you lying numerous times, you cannot blame her for doubting you to be doing something wrong behind her back. And it won’t be easy winning her complete trust again.

In this article, the top Relationship Expert and Marriage Counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares things men must do to earn a woman’s trust.

Begin With Friendship

Friendship is the core base of a relationship. Through a genuine friendship, you can let the girl know who you really are without any pressure and vice versa. It may be a slower process, but it is a lot better than starting with a date immediately.

Be Real In Front Of Her

Being true to your own self before the woman you like will make it simpler for her to trust you because of she gets to learn who you are and who you are not. Pretending to be someone else could impress her in the starting, but sooner or later she will find out your true colors and that will make her feel deceived.

Make Your Intentions Clear To Her

If you want to date a girl, you need to make your intentions pretty clear. Is it because you like her and you want to know her better. Or are you just bored and only want to have fun This will help her set limitations for your relationship and avoid disappointments as well.

Be Consistent With How You Treat Her

Men are mostly good at making girls feel special during the dating stage, but once they go steady after sometimes of being together, their treatment towards them turn sour. When a girl feels that her boyfriend has changed towards her, she cannot help think he has found someone else. Therefore, ensure that you remain polite and affectionate to your girl all throughout your relationship.

Never Break Promises

Never make a promise that you cannot keep. Once you have broken a promise, the woman you promised to will be disappointed and will believe you are a liar. It will be difficult for her to trust you again, so think twice before you vow to do something.

Be The First One To Let Her Know

If you are trapped in a situation where you know it would enrage your girl, like you ran into your ex in a shop and got trapped for an hour in it, do not try to hide what happened. Instead, tell her instantly before anyone else does. If she gets to know it from another source, she would feel you are hiding things from her.

Be Open To Her

Openness is an important factor in a healthy relationship because you can sincerely tell each other how you feel. It is not a great sign if you cannot trust each other with your thoughts. If you really want your girlfriend to be honest with you, make the first attempt by opening up your feelings and secrets to her.

Show That You Trust Her

Trust creates trust. You cannot expect trust from a woman if you don’t trust her yourself. This is why make her feel that you fully trust her. Do not check her phone every time you see her or get bothered with her male friends easily.

Be Patient

Do not be impatient while trying to get a woman’s trust, particularly if it was your fault why you lost it. It takes time to create trust. Therefore, just be consistent and loyal to her all the time. Don’t ever pressure her to trust you because it would be difficult for her.

Be Trustworthy

Trust is fragile. It is not easy to gain, but it can be broken in just a moment. Therefore, instead of focusing on getting a woman’s trust, look to build integrity for yourself. This way, you can be trustworthy to anyone, and it will not be that difficult to get anyone to believe in you.

Relationships, no matter how new or old, is one of the most beautiful parts of your life. When you are in love with your partner, it seems as if everything around you is non-existent and that anything could be conquered simply through love.

Although that may be true when you mix in specific relationship behaviors, things can become turbulent between you two and in turn, might make things to get vulnerable very quickly. What’s even worse is when you know the behaviors you have exhibited or encountered are unhealthy, but you simply choose to ignore them. In this article, Marriage Counselor, Relationship Expert, and Founder of Saarthi Counselling Services Shivani Misri Sadhoo talks about things that pushes your partner away from you.

Using Silent Treatment

Although going silent after a heated discussion with your partner may seem like the best response, but this is a behavior that you should eliminate.

Silent treatment damages relationships and leads to less relationship satisfaction. Avoid this damage inflicting treatment and instead communicate openly and honestly with your partner

Communication does not mean confrontation. Opening up dialogue can assist you to get to the root of your problem and solve it efficiently.

Assuming Your Partner Knows Everything

Another behavior that couples must stop is thinking that their partner knows everything without you telling them.

Your partner cannot read your mind or know your needs unless you express them. It is not fair to assume that your partner should be able to determine your every desire if you don’t tell them. Many people are not good at reading minds. In good relationships, partners are honest and decisive about expressing their needs, and their partners are the same way.

A good partner will not think you are nagging simply because you are expressing what you need from your partner and telling them how you feel.

Being Passive Aggressive

Keeping your feelings to yourself will seem easier than expressing them while you are in a relationship, but in reality, doing so could really hurt your relationship.

Almost everybody is familiar with the situation when there is some problem and one partner asks the other if they are upset and the partner says, I am OK, but things are most certainly not fine. If you are upset, the best way to do is to say so. You probably want to come off as non-confrontational, but ultimately that will not do you or your relationship good. When you bottle up your emotions you can begin to develop resentments towards your partner.

Those can intensify and result in a huge disaster that could have been avoided if you just addressed the concern from the start. Your partner is not certainly a mind reader, so if they ask you, answer them honestly and communicate about it. Good communication will always help your relationship grow further in a good direction.

Obsessing Over Your Partner

While in love and sending cute text messages entire day to your partner may be normal at first, but if you see yourself being too concerned with whatever they do, this may be a big problem. This is actually an obsessive behavior.

It’s easy to get caught up in the wind of romance, particularly when you first start dating, but this behavior can destroy you and your relationship. When you start to get into obsessive thinking, you are slowly exerting up the pressure on yourself and your partner. You may not know it but you’re not giving the relationship space it requires to manifest as it supposed to. Though it may seem as if you are only expressing your love, being a bit too into your partner can damage the chemistry.

Showing Your Relationship On Social Media

Since you live in the era of social media, it is quite easy to over-share in various aspects of your life and that includes your relationship. It is not acceptable to do this, particularly against your partner’s wishes.

Instead of aiming to become relationship goals for social media, act on being the best couple you can be in your real life.

Letting Your Friends Or Relatives Get Involved In Your Relationship

Whenever something bad or good is happening in your relationship, it’s natural to run to your friends or family members to discuss it. However, it is one of the biggest mistakes you can make and you should eradicate it from your behavior.

If you ask your friends about things they may not agree. Few friends are not pro relationships. Check who you trust to a small few and know that certain topics are not at all for discussion.

You should feel easy enough to discuss your concerns with your partner before taking them to another person.

Intimacy or lovemaking does not have to get boring in a long-term marriage. As the years pass by and you get older, your intimate relationship must get better. Sex with your partner can become more satisfying because you know each other’s preferences, likes, dislikes, and habits.

You know that life can get in the way. Work, children, finances, and several issues can dampen the romance. These everyday factors can hamper both your desire for sex and getting the time to put in the effort. But do not put sex on a shelve or last to-do tasks. There are ways to prioritize lovemaking and keep it healthy and exciting.

In today’s article, Delhi’s top Marriage Counsellor and Founder of Saarthi Counselling Services shares tips for couples to maintain a healthy and exciting marital life intimately.

Set Boundaries

Create boundaries around your immediate or nuclear family. Include individual, couple, and family time built into your daily life and pre-defined lines of connection with each partner’s family. This means you have clear boundaries around how much time you spend with your and your spouse’s family. Your own relationship and family should be the first priority.

Touch Each Other Whenever You Can

Have a well-established connection around non-sexual physical touching, holding each other’s hand, laying together, and sitting on the couch with each other. Touch each other often. Make a routine to kiss when saying hello and bidding goodbye every day.

Say I Love You To Each Other

Hearing the three magical words I love you can make you feel reassured about the way your partner feels about the relationship with you. It is a small gesture that can keep your connection alive. Call each other during the day to say it if you missed your chance earlier in the day.

Set Date For Love Making

Have consistent physical intimacy dates. Having a frequent sexual relationship in your marriage is essential. Couples in the 20s have sex an average of 2 to 4 times a week. Couples in the 30s normally do it twice a week and couples in the 40s and 50s usually have it once every week. Pay attention to the frequency at which you are having sex. Try not to be sexually intimate less than twice a month, because you may get into a habit that does not give priority to connecting in a physical manner. Maintaining your physical connection provides your marriage staying power and safeguard it from the stresses of life. Make time either spontaneously or planned, to follow through with consistent lovemaking and intimacy. Your sexual relationship should be a tension reducer, not a tension builder.

Compliment Your Partner

Compliment your spouse in front of others. Not only it is a good thing to do, but it also helps your spouse feel a deep sense of attachment to you and boosts their self-esteem. It’s also good to model for your kids so that they see you being complementary to each other.

Change The Pattern Of Your Love Making

Try often to make love using a distinct sexual script. By mixing up your normal order of kissing, foreplay, and intercourse, you can reconnect in a great way. By mixing up the script, you take ownership of pleasure and excitement in your marriage. Nothing is better than feeling desired and having a partner who takes control of the sexual relationship.

Regularly Treat Each Other

Regularly give your partner small gifts or show gestures of love and care. Leave your spouse a loving note, get them a special treat when you go shopping or come back from office. Write I love you on a slip and keep it in their cupboard. Pay attention to these small but moving gestures.

Arrange Weekly Dates

Plan weekly dates to keep the spark in your connection. Also, arrange weekly business meetings to discuss professional life or including the division of roles and household responsibilities, weekly plans, and other matters that need to be discussed. By keeping these conversations apart, date night can be about connecting, talking, and getting physical, while organizational business night can be about work-related problem-solving and working as a team during the week.

Traditionally, marriages in India is the union of two souls, not just an event that brings two people together. In fact, a few decades back, even a large percentage of urban Indians perceived that marriage bonding continues to exist for the next 7 life and death cycles. Times in 2019 has changed, technology development and the emergence of the global economy has shifted people’s lifestyle, changed life priorities, burdened large middle-class populations under loans & monthly EMIs, and most importantly it has restricted the time that people get to spend with their family.

Unfortunately, the conflict between the perception about marriage that most has received from our childhood and the harsh reality of modern urban Indian society has resulted in a common situation – where people get married without thinking of the chances of separation. And they miss taking most of the vital steps required to strengthen their relationship in the current social situation.

That is why it is sometimes a wise thing to think less of the wedding vows and take time to consider what they could do when the things may hit a rocky patch in the future. This is one of the major reasons why couples should think about marriage counseling on a serious note.

In this article Delhi’s top marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares insight on about the reason marriage counseling is more important than the wedding vows.

Premarital Counselling Helps You To Envisage the Relationship’s Future

Marriage counseling can actually start before the wedding. This counseling could include discussing the couple’s individual family past and the family they plan to develop together, including the possibility of kids, how you will deal with conflict.

You can also visit a marriage or family counselor for premarital counseling, which will help you to start your marriage with a clutter-free mind.

It could be a way to clear up any cynicism or fear of marriage and give you a secure place to talk about things like if, when and how many offsprings you want, how you can deal with monetary issues or other stressors in your relationship and to ensure you have similar values and goals for your relationship, your family and your life together.

Taking the time to have premarital counseling also sets you up to be more open to engaging in marriage counseling later on if you need it.

It Is Not Only About Fixing Things But Developing Stronger Roots.

The most common reasons couples opt for marriage counseling include lack of communication in their relationship, lack of emotional support or engagement and worries that they are probably headed toward divorce.

Other factors that often send couples to therapy include fighting or specific relationship matters like infidelity.

Some people simply want to make their marriages stronger and last longer and look to seek professional help.

While Proceeding For A Counseling, Be Certain About What You Want From It

Most couples engage in marriage counseling once issues have been broiling for months, or even years, and the more you wait to seek help the complex it is to work through the issues. Usually, on an average, a couple waits 6 years more than they should begin counseling.

Know what you need from counseling from the start. Are you and your partner all in, entirely committed to save the marriage, no matter how much effort it takes? Or is one or both of you are certain you want to call it off? Knowing the answers will help define what success feels like, but either way, you must maintain an open mind about the process.

Trust usually is the act of establishing confidence and being able to depend on someone or something. Trust is essential for relationships, to function and for any person to be relatively happy. Without trust, insecurity sets in.

Trust is a matter of degree, and certain life experiences can affect an individual’s ability to trust others. The matter of trust and relationships focuses on the question of whether the partners are honest and faithful enough to each other.

Being able to trust your partner is the most essential part of a being in a relationship. Trust is said to be the core foundation of every relationship from which a strong connection can be created. Without trust in a relationship, relationships will not grow and prosper to a deeper level.

Delhi’s Top Marriage Counselor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares tips to create trust in a relationship. Here they are.

Communicate Effectively

Communication is an essential factor in creating trust between partners in a relationship. Partners must communicate about their problems instead of sitting on them and brooding. When the time comes for communication, do it face to face. Personal verbal communication bolsters the bond between partners in a relationship.

Try to avoid communicate over emails, phone calls or texts. Instead, make it more personal and direct. When communicating, ensure that you keep eye contact with your partner as frequent eye contact during a discussion increases the bond of partners.

Do Not Hide Secrets from Each Other

Trust needs honesty and openness. If you are looking to build trust in a relationship, you must avoid to keep secrets and be open with your partner. To become a trustworthy partner, you must be honest in all your conversations and dealings with your partner.

Secrets ruin up relationships quite rapidly, so it is important, to be honest, and sincere about issues that arise together or individually. Having an open mind towards your partner assists him or her to share their deep dark secrets which are a sign that they trust you.

Set Boundaries

Defining clear boundaries set together is important to develop trust amongst partners. Setting boundaries help in explaining how much space you are comfortable with, in a relationship, physically and emotionally.

Boundaries can be about any kind of things, how much time you need to be alone, how convenient you feel about your relationship to tell other people and so on. Accepting one another’s boundaries is helpful when it comes to creating trust in the relationship.

Learn To Say No

You need to understand one thing, everything that your partner wants is what you are willing or capable to provide. You do not have to say YES every time to everything your partner wants or asks to do. If you do not like the certain thing he or she proposes to do, simply say no. You should not be enslaved to a relationship. You should not be forced to sustain what you don’t like. When a relationship is based on equality, it will be easier for both of you to march forward.

Do not cater to the vagaries of your partner just to make him or her happy, as this will ruin the relationship.

Never Make Promises You Cannot Keep

Never break your promises. Keep your words and your promises. If you have promised your partner that you are going to do something, ensure that you do it.

It makes a lot of sense that you want to keep promises you have made to your partner, but often the little things you promised get forgotten. Keeping your promises about small things is as important as keeping your promises about the big ones

When you are late, call your partner and tell what is holding you down, remember to pick up those items from the local store and remember to pay the bills on time. Yes these things appear small and it might be overlooked, but they go a very long way towards developing trust in a relationship.

Do Not Cheat On Your Partner

It is in the natural configuration of humans to get attracted to more than one person. But this does not permit you to cheat on your partner. Even if you are bored in the relationship, resolve it up or else walk out of it. But you should not cheat on your partner simply because she/ he is not fun to be with or you do not enjoy his or her company any longer. To develop trust in a relationship, make sure you tell your partner plainly that you are not happy with the way things are amongst the two of you, and need to sort it out, or else, walk out of the relationship.

Take Accountability of Your Actions

Take ownership of your behaviour, action, and inaction. Never try to pass the blame to a situation or someone else. Be true with yourself and to your partner as to why you made your decisions.

Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo is an experienced and certified Couples Therapist with specialization in the area of Personal Crisis interventions like coping-up with Relationship Issues, Marriage Counselling, Separation and divorce, Child and Adolescent issues, Depression, Stress, Domestic, Loss & Grief. Counsellor Shivani is currently working with India’s top hospital groups like Fortis Hospital, IBS (Indian Brain & Spine) Hospital and with Express Clinics.

Whether it relates to your relationships, career, or your own self well-being, knowing how to tough through disturbing situations by finding ways to be emotionally strong can positively impact your life. When it comes to stress, it can affect many people in various ways, some might cry every time they are frustrated or guilty. While others choose to be quiet and hide until they feel good. Though, there is nothing wrong with either of those situations. Being aware of how to manage your emotions and dictate why you are feeling them can help you understand yourself in a better way so that you can stop considering yourself weak.

Emotional strength comes from when you allow yourself to be both independent and dependent. This means developing up your internal resources and becoming comfortable seeking and accepting help,

Learning how to handle life’s misfortunes is a great method to build your emotional strength.

Delhi’s top marriage counsellor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo share tips to make yourself emotionally stronger.

Respect the Strength Of Your Past

It becomes difficult to be emotionally strong if you keep living in the past. You need to throw away those thoughts and accept the reality that those struggles made you who you are today, which is a strong, better person. Many a time we have bitterness from the devastation, slavery or even family history of violence and crime. You can instead, respect the struggles and our cultures in a way which are positive. Do not discount the struggle, instead see how it can be a way to respect the strength in your past. If you can honor the strength of the past, you are a result of that past, so you honor yourself and become stronger.

Make Healthy Choices

A lot of your emotional strength generally comes from within. This means you will most likely feel your best if you eat healthily and treat your body with utmost care. Remember that every time you make healthy choices, you actually strengthen yourself. For example, have you selected an apple over a sweet candy, one point scored for becoming stronger? Have you taken a stroll and enjoy the view? Another point scored for resiliency. Honor every time you create a healthy decision.

Help Others in Need

It may sound weird to help other people especially when you are trying to figure out things for yourself. But when you are unselfish you can become strong because the care you show towards others can reverberate and look into caring for your own life, too. Helping others creates empathy and it makes us a better person, over a period of time. This way you become stronger emotionally.

Embrace Your Adversities

Never beat yourself up when things are not going your way. Failing is a part of life and how you look to challenge and accept it can really alter your perspective in a positive manner. Try to practice some positive psychology and start to embrace all your challenges and adversities as your greatest teachers and power for changes.

Identify Your Emotions

Do not look to criticize or punish yourself for having certain feelings. It is natural to feel low, angry or jealous. When you experience any negative emotions, carefully analyze them and figure out what you want your next step to be. Allow yourself to identify and accept every emotion you have and then decide if you want to follow this emotion or let it go.

Relationship Tips by Marriage Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo

Many of you believe that love should be similar to the kind of romance you see portrayed in movies, television, and storybooks. Due to this notion, you may feel that a romantic relationship are less if you do not experience this kind of fairy tale relationship.

Many a time you feel like if you can have a perfect prince or princess then life will be a lot easier. You will think that your life will be safer forever.

The reality is you did marry a prince or a princess but that person is also a human, who will have faults and shortcomings like any other person, does not matter how wonderful he or she is. You need to understand that at some point you have to let go of the unrealistic metaphor of romantic love in order to search true happiness.

So, how could you make relationships work and remain happy?

You need to begin with the understanding of what eternal love is and then redefine and update the romantic fairy-tale into a healthier kind of love.

Today, Delhi’s eminent marriage counselor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo reveals how to create a strong, intimate relationship. Here they are. These will help you to create true intimacy, find real love and be truly happy in your relationship.

Use Relationships to Teach You How to Be Complete within

Relationships are not just about having another person fulfil you, but coming to the relationship whole and sharing your life interdependently. By letting go of the romantic ideal of merging and becoming “ONE” to love the gaps in a relationship as much as the closeness.

Look Your Partner For Who He or She Really Is

The tragedy in romance happens when you look at the person you are in love with as a symbol of what they have come to show, the idea of him or her. When you understand that more often than not you do not actually know your partner, you start to discover who they are and how they change and evolve.

Be Willing To Learn From Each Other

The idea is to see the other as a mirror and learn from the image of how you can be a better person. When you feel upset, rather than blame your partner and pointing fingers, remain awake to what is yet to be healed in yourself.

Get Comfortable Being Alone

In order to accept that love cannot save you from being alone, try to learn to spend time being with yourself. By feeling safe and secure to be on your own within the core of the relationship, you will feel complete and happy.

Own Who You Are

We generally grasp at romantic love because we’re desiring for something that is beyond reach, something in our partner that we do not think we possess in ourselves. Sadly, when we finally get love, we discover that we have not got what we were looking for.

Understand that true love only exists by loving yourself first. You can get only from another person what you are willing to give yourself.

Embrace Ordinariness

Once the fairy-dust start of a relationship ends, we find ordinariness, and we often try to do everything we can to avoid it. The idea is to see that ordinariness can become the real “spice” of intimacy. The daily loveliness of sharing life with your partner can, and does, become extraordinary.

Monitor Closely Why a Fight May Start

Many couples create distance by fighting and then making up time and again. This allows you to continue the romantic trance, creating scenes and escaping real intimacy. If you become aware of what you fear about intimacy, you will have a better sense of why you are fighting and are likely to fight less.

Expand Your Heart

One thing that unites us is that we all want to be happy. This happiness generally includes the desire to be close to someone in a loving way. To create true intimacy, get in touch with the spaciousness of your heart and bring awareness to what is good inside you. It will be easier to identify the good in your partner when become connected to the good in yourself.

Focus on Giving Love

True happiness is not about feeling good about yourselves because other people love you this is more about how well you have loved yourselves and others. The unintentional result of loving others more deeply is that we are loved more deeply.

Let Go Of Expectations

You might look at things such as romance and constant togetherness to fill a void in yourself. This will certainly cause suffering. If you unconsciously expect to receive love in particular ways to avoid giving that love to yourself, you will put your sense of security in someone else. Create upon your own inner-resources to offer love, attention, and nurture to yourself when you require it. This way you can allow love to come to you instead of putting expectations on what it needs to look like.

These are some ways by exploring them you can create a strong and intimate relationship.

There is an old saying that developing a relationship is easier than maintaining it. We are living in such a world now where relationships are becoming complex day by day. We often look to run away when it is the time to mend the relationships due to various reasons. But once a relationship is broken, it’s very hard to recover. Thus, it is very important to pay attention when you start to feel that your relationship is on the verge of collapsing. When you start observing that you are saying we need to talk more, it is a sure sign that relationship is collapsing. Thus, this becomes very important to repair a relationship before it becomes too late. You have to be patient and devoted to the problems that need to be taken care of.

Delhi’s Eminent Marriage Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares her insights on how to repair a relationship that is collapsing. These are:

Find Out The Reasons

Before you try to repair the loopholes of your relationship, you need to find out the root of the issues. If you observe a change in your partner’s behavior, try to find out the possible reasons behind it. Since, you are well aware of your partner’s interests and concern areas, finding out the reason and fixing the problem would not be a difficult task.

Enhance Your Communication

Before involving in an argument, try being a good listener. Always ensure that you always lend an ear to what your partner wants to say. Honestly saying, you cannot be the only one talking all the time. If you let your partner speak, it makes them feel valued and gives you an opportunity to understand the issues better.

Spend More Time With Each Other

Try spending a good time with each other. Even if it involves doing something which you do not like, put an effort. Spending more time with your partner will help you find out the real problem and then you can look for ways to resolve it.

Do Not Bring Up The Past

Even it is a past issue or a long-forgotten fight, avoid discussing the past. It will only make the situation difficult by blowing things out randomly. Pay attention to your present, address the complaints and try to resolve the causes that are ruining it. You will never be happy discussing what happened in the past.

Learn To Forgive

If you can forgive your partner, it will help you save your relationship. Repairing your bonding and connection issues is all about understanding each other and giving another opportunity. Forget what has happened and start afresh. It will help detox your mind and prevent the past from clouding your judgments.

Learn To Compromise

When you are in a committed relationship, it is also about making compromises. You cannot always have things as per your wishes. The earlier you accept this; the better opportunities you will have at repairing things. A relationship that is on the verge of collapsing requires more compromises than a healthy one.

Talk About Your Feelings

Never expect your partner to guess your emotions and thoughts. Rather, be vocal about your feelings. If you do not talk openly about your feelings, your partner will never be able to understand it. As a result, it will create a communication gap which would be be very tough to bridge.

Life of the married couples can turn up extremely hectic in cities, especially if they have school going children. Commonly today’s new academic curriculum, in most cases, puts extreme financial as well as personal pressure on couples. After a tiring day at the office and stressful driving back to home, they are expected to help kids finish their long list of homework, school projects, exam preparation and so on. 

These things consume so much time of the couples that they usually forget that they have a life of their own as a couple that needs attention, rest, nourishment and refreshment.

Unfortunately, such a life situation make a marriage and romance extremely vulnerable. Talking on this topic Delhi’s top marriage counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo reveals some easy yet fun things couples can do together to rejuvenate their relationship.

1. Arrange for a Date Night Together

Couples who are parents always appreciate a spontaneous date night. But in the free time between those spontaneous breaks away from your routine, arrange for a complete date night together. Date nights do not necessarily have to be expensive to be fun either. Plan for a less expensive date night that allows you both out of the house without having to think about your family budget.

2. Try a Getaway Together

Pack your bags and suitcase and get away for the night or a weekend. A romantic getaway refreshes you both and gives you some quality time outside of your daily family life. If your budget is limited, try for a one-night excursion and opt for a good local hotel. Or if you are thinking for a getaway on a weekend, then you can easily plan for nearby locales from your city or town.

3. Renew Your Wows

Looking for something to do together it’s a little bit elaborate? Renew your vows in front of family and friends or have a private ceremony in your living room. By renewing you give yourselves a great reminder of the bond you two share with each other and it is also a fun way to include your kids into your vow renewal ceremony.

4. Take Up New Hobbies Together

Find for some common ground and look for hobbies you would enjoy as a couple. There could be a simple connection between your hobbies, such as going to a nature park. He will look to spy through binoculars and you can take pictures of the birds or animals you find.

5. Look to Cook Together

People say that the couple that cooks together stays together. Well, take out the measuring cups and recipe book to spice things up in the kitchen. At least one night a month, you and your spouse must wait to eat dinner until the kids go to sleep. Then cook your meal together and enjoy a gentle quiet dinner for just the two of you. If you can get out of the house take a cooking class together to know some new recipes and cooking methods.
 
6. Celebrate Together

Every day should be of a celebration of your marriage and family. Celebrate those moments. Mark your calendar to celebrate your first meeting, the date of your engagement and, of course, your wedding. But also be sure to celebrate other moments of life. If your spouse gets a promotion, cook a special dish to celebrate or give him or her a gift. We often ignore these regular life moments and keep them under the rug but celebrating them as they happen is another way to celebrate you, your spouse and the life you have together as a couple.