Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

No relationship is flawless. Even in the most loving partnerships, there will be moments when your partner hurts you—sometimes unintentionally, other times, it may feel more deliberate. Disagreements are inevitable, whether they’re about money, parenting, or personality clashes. What often turns minor conflicts into significant issues is when boundaries are crossed or ignored.

So, what do we do when conflict arises? Do we keep fighting, seek revenge, or find a way to forgive? Forgiveness doesn’t mean accepting wrongdoing. Instead, it allows you to let go of the pain, anger, and resentment, choosing healing over hurting. By forgiving, you help your relationship grow stronger.

What are the ways to forgive in relationships?

Leading marriage counselor in Delhi and Gurgaon Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares six steps to forgiveness in relationships.

Honest Communication

The first step toward forgiveness is having a heart-to-heart talk with your partner. Open and honest communication is essential for understanding what went wrong. Trust may feel shattered, like being caught in a storm, but discussing the situation helps you move forward. If your partner lied, ask why they hid the truth. If they became emotionally distant, explore why they felt unable to express their needs. Honest dialogue is the foundation for rebuilding trust and moving ahead together.

Look Within

Forgiveness is more about your healing than the other person’s actions. It involves releasing anger, pain, and resentment, but this shouldn’t be rushed. Take the time to process and heal before letting go of those emotions. Focus on what you can control—your own thoughts and actions. This may involve accepting your role in the conflict or recognizing that you need to shift your perspective. By looking within, you empower yourself to heal, regardless of what the other person does.

Embrace Empathy

Practicing empathy can help you better understand the other person’s perspective. Try to see the situation through their eyes. Ask yourself what might have influenced their actions—stress, personal struggles, or feeling overwhelmed. Considering their challenges may help you approach the issue with more understanding and patience. Empathy doesn’t excuse bad behavior, but it does allow you to approach the situation with compassion, making forgiveness easier.

Conquer Your Fear

Holding onto anger and resentment might feel like it gives you power or protects you from future hurt, but in reality, it does the opposite. Resentment creates distance in relationships and blocks healing. It builds walls rather than offering protection and can make future conversations harder. Letting go of anger doesn’t mean losing your strength; it means finding peace and moving forward with clarity. Freeing yourself from negative emotions will allow you to create space for healthier communication and happiness in the relationship.

Let It Go

Forgiveness requires releasing your pain. While this may be difficult, it’s essential for your emotional well-being. Identify why it’s hard to forgive, then be willing to let go. As you work through your emotions, release any resentment, anger, or hurt. Though forgiving someone who has deeply hurt you can be challenging, doing so frees you from emotional burdens and restores your peace of mind. Forgiveness allows you to move forward, enabling personal and relationship growth.

Show Accountability

Mistakes happen, and there is no shame in making them. It’s essential to forgive yourself and your partner to move beyond challenges. Mistakes are opportunities for growth, and forgiveness fosters trust and accountability. It reduces resentment and ends the blame game. Taking responsibility for your actions—whether you were hurt or caused hurt—builds trust over time. If you’ve wronged your partner, own up to it and apologize sincerely. A genuine apology acknowledges the pain caused and shows a commitment to change. While an apology doesn’t erase the hurt, it demonstrates your desire to improve and make things right.

Forgiveness is a journey, not a destination. By embracing honest communication, self-reflection, empathy, and accountability, you can release pain and resentment. This process strengthens relationships, allowing love and trust to flourish again. With patience and mutual effort, forgiveness paves the way for a brighter future together.

Relationships thrive on trust, love, and mutual respect. But sometimes, infidelity can creep in, leaving deep emotional scars. Discovering a partner’s betrayal is devastating, yet many are left confused, unsure if their suspicions are valid. Noticing certain behavioural changes can help you uncover the truth. Top marriage counsellor in Delhi and Gurgaon Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares 5 telltale signs that your partner may be cheating.

What are the sure-shot signs of a cheating partner?

Too Secretive – Has your partner become overly protective of their digital devices? While personal space is important, sudden secrecy raises red flags. If they’ve changed passwords, hide their phone, or avoid answering questions about their whereabouts, it may indicate they have something to conceal.

When someone who was once open suddenly becomes evasive, it’s often a sign of inappropriate interactions or hidden conversations.

Unexplainably Unreachable – Is your partner suddenly unavailable at times when they used to be easy to reach? Consistent excuses like “meetings,” “dead zones,” or late work hours could be masking something deeper. If their once-predictable communication patterns have changed drastically, especially during late hours or business trips, trust your instincts—these could be signs of infidelity.

Sudden Focus on Appearance – A sudden, intense focus on appearance—new clothes, gym routines, or grooming habits—can indicate they’re trying to impress someone else. While self-improvement is normal, if it’s paired with defensiveness or secrecy, you may have reason to be concerned. This behavior, especially when accompanied by other suspicious actions, is a telltale sign that something could be wrong.

Emotional Disconnect – Has your once emotionally connected partner grown distant? If they used to confide in you but now avoid deep conversations, it may indicate they’re emotionally checked out of the relationship. Emotional withdrawal often accompanies infidelity, leaving you feeling disconnected and uncertain about where you stand. Addressing this growing gap early is vital for the health of the relationship.

Constant Lies – Lies are often a cover for cheating, as maintaining a web of deceit becomes harder over time. Inconsistencies in their stories, vague excuses, and defensive reactions, when questioned, can be signs of dishonesty. If you notice constant lying, especially when they avoid providing evidence or become evasive, it’s a red flag that something is wrong.

These signs—secrecy, unreachability, sudden focus on appearance, emotional disconnect, and constant lies—are often indicators of infidelity. Open communication is essential to address suspicions and preserve trust in your relationship. Recognizing these signs early can help you confront the issue and decide the best way forward.

Money plays a pivotal role in relationships, and significant income disparity can sometimes lead to feelings of resentment. While financial differences are common, the key to avoiding resentment is fostering understanding, communication, and mutual respect between partners.

How can you navigate this sensitive issue without causing tension in your relationship?

Shivani Misri Sadhoo, one of the top couples therapists in Delhi and Gurgaon explains how to deal with such a scenario in this blog.

Open and Honest Communication

The foundation of any healthy relationship is communication. If one partner earns significantly more, it’s important to have open conversations about finances. Discuss how the income disparity makes both of you feel. Some may experience feelings of inadequacy or frustration, while others may feel overwhelmed by financial responsibility. Talking about these feelings in a non-judgmental way helps both partners understand each other’s perspectives, creating a sense of emotional safety.

Tip: Set aside time for regular money conversations, where both partners can share their thoughts and goals.

Avoid Power Imbalance

One of the main triggers of resentment is when the higher-earning partner holds financial control or power over the other. This can create a dynamic where the lower-earning partner feels dependent, leading to frustration. To avoid this, both partners should feel like they have an equal say in financial decisions, even if the contributions are unequal.

Tip: Create a shared budget where both partners contribute proportionally based on their income. This ensures fairness while maintaining financial equity in the relationship.

Respect Each Other’s Contributions

Money isn’t the only contribution that matters in a relationship. The partner who earns less may still be contributing in significant ways, such as taking care of the household, managing family responsibilities, or providing emotional support. It’s important to value these non-financial contributions and acknowledge them as equally important to the partnership.

Tip: Express appreciation for the unique strengths and efforts each person brings to the relationship, regardless of income.

Set Mutual Financial Goals

Working towards common financial goals helps both partners feel aligned, regardless of their individual incomes. Whether it’s saving for a vacation, a house, or retirement, setting goals together creates a sense of partnership. Both partners can contribute in ways that feel meaningful to them, fostering a feeling of teamwork.

Tip: Review your financial goals as a couple regularly, making sure both partners are actively involved in the planning and decision-making.

Focus on the Bigger Picture

Income differences should not overshadow the love and commitment you share. Avoid comparing your financial situation to others or using money as a measure of success in your relationship. Instead, focus on what truly matters—emotional connection, mutual respect, and shared values. When you concentrate on the strengths of your relationship, the income disparity becomes less significant.

Tip: Celebrate the milestones you achieve together as a couple, no matter how big or small.

Navigating income disparity in a relationship requires effort from both partners. By focusing on communication, mutual respect, and shared goals, couples can avoid resentment and build a stronger partnership. Remember, it’s not the amount of money that determines the success of a relationship, but the way you manage it together.