Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

Dating apps have changed how people in India meet and form relationships. What was once considered taboo is now widely accepted, especially among urban youth and working professionals. Apps like Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, and several Indian platforms promise convenience, choice, and compatibility.

However, along with opportunities for genuine connections, dating apps also carry serious risks. Being aware of common warning signs, potential dangers, and essential safety practices is crucial for anyone navigating online dating in India, says Shivani Misri Sadhoo who is an experienced couples and relationship counselor in Delhi, India.

Why Are Dating Apps in Demand in India?

Dating apps are growing rapidly in India due to changing social dynamics and digital accessibility. Young adults today value independence and prefer choosing their partners based on shared interests and personal compatibility rather than traditional matchmaking systems.

Another key factor is lifestyle change. Long working hours, remote jobs, and migration to new cities make it difficult to meet people organically. Dating apps provide a fast and convenient way to connect without relying on social circles.

Increased smartphone usage and affordable internet have also played a major role. Dating apps are no longer limited to metro cities; users from tier-2 and tier-3 cities are actively joining these platforms.

Lastly, dating apps offer flexibility and control. Users can decide whom to talk to, what information to share, and when to disengage, making online dating appealing to people who prefer privacy and autonomy.

Warning Signs and Dangers of Using Dating Apps in India

India’s leading couples therapist and relationship counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo, asks to watch out for these warning signs:

Fake Profiles and Catfishing

One of the most common risks on dating apps is encountering fake profiles. Scammers often use stolen or heavily edited photos and fabricate personal details to appear trustworthy. Over time, they build emotional connections and eventually ask for money, favors, or sensitive information.

Financial Fraud and Romance Scams

Financial scams are a serious issue in India. Fraudsters may pretend to be business professionals, army officers, or NRIs and lure users into fake investments or emergency money requests. Once emotional trust is built, victims often ignore red flags and suffer significant financial losses.

Emotional Manipulation and Harassment

Some users engage in emotional abuse through gaslighting, guilt-tripping, or pressuring matches for intimacy. Persistent messaging, controlling behavior, or pushing for explicit content are major warning signs. In extreme cases, private chats or photos may be used for blackmail or threats.

Physical Safety Risks

Meeting strangers offline carries real physical dangers. There have been reports of assault, stalking, extortion, and coercion after in-person meetings arranged via dating apps. Since most platforms do not conduct detailed background checks, users often have limited knowledge of a person’s true identity or intentions.

Privacy and Data Misuse

Sharing personal details too early can lead to privacy violations. Phone numbers, addresses, workplace information, or social media accounts can be misused for identity theft, cyberstalking, or long-term harassment.

Safety Tips for Using Dating Apps in India

Some of the best tips to follow for safety while using dating apps are:

Verify Profiles Carefully

Check for consistency in profile photos, bios, and conversation details. Profiles with very limited information or overly perfect images should be treated cautiously. Reverse image searches can help identify stolen pictures.

Never Share Financial or Sensitive Information

Avoid sharing bank details, OTPs, Aadhaar numbers, home addresses, or personal documents. No genuine match will ask for money or confidential information, especially in the early stages.

Use In-App Messaging

Stick to the app’s chat feature initially instead of shifting immediately to WhatsApp or Telegram. Dating apps provide reporting, blocking, and moderation tools that offer an extra layer of protection.

Meet Only in Public Places

For first meetings, choose well-lit, public locations such as cafés, restaurants, or malls. Inform a trusted friend or family member about your plans and avoid isolated or late-night meetups.

Trust Your Instincts

If someone rushes intimacy, avoids video calls, gives inconsistent stories, or makes you uncomfortable, disengage immediately. You do not owe politeness at the cost of your safety.

Stay Informed and Update Privacy Settings

Regularly review app privacy settings and stay aware of common online dating scams in India. Knowledge and awareness are your strongest defenses against misuse.

Dating apps can be a powerful tool for meeting new people, but they require caution and awareness. By understanding common dangers, recognizing warning signs, and following practical safety tips, users can enjoy online dating while protecting their emotional, financial, and physical well-being.

Smart decisions and strong boundaries are the key to safe and meaningful connections in the digital dating world.

Check out popular blog post on Dating Apps

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If you have just gotten used to some of the strangest dating terms like ChemRIZZtry, Curveball-crushing, Love-loreing, and Truecasting, then gear up for another one. This new term draws inspiration from the world of penguins and is winning hearts everywhere.

It’s called Pebbling. Yes, the name sounds cute—and the concept is even cuter. If you’re wondering how pebbling got its name and why it is becoming one of the most popular dating trends today, shares Shivani Misri Sadhoo, who is one of the most experienced couples therapists and relationship counsellors in Delhi and India.

What is Pebbling?

Did you know that penguins woo their potential partners with pebbles? Sounds strange! Well, it is a cute way of expressing love, I would say. The male penguins quite meticulously select the perfect pebble to impress their significant other. We humans, couldn’t help but borrow this charming idea of expressing affection through small, thoughtful gestures-because sometimes it is the simplest tokens that carry the most meaning.

Ways We Do It

Humans have found novel ways of dating their partners. Pebbling can be used in digital as well as physical modes. Let’s see how:

Physical pebbling

Gifting meaningful keepsakes

Offering someone a small item picked up during a trip—something that immediately reminded you of them—is a deeply intentional act. It’s not about cost or grandeur, but recognition. The object becomes a stand-in for the moment you paused, thought of them, and chose to bring a piece of that experience back. It tells them they occupy space in your mind even when they’re not physically present.

Handwritten notes filled with emotion

A handwritten note carries a kind of intimacy that can’t be replicated. Each word reflects time, care, and vulnerability. The imperfections—the slant of the handwriting, the pauses between lines—make it human. These notes endure, becoming something the recipient can return to whenever they need comfort, reassurance, or a reminder of being loved.

Bringing baked goods

Baking for someone is a quiet labour of affection. It involves effort, patience, and the desire to give something made by hand. More than food, it’s an offering of warmth and nurture. Sharing something homemade says, I wanted to create comfort for you.

Gifting a thoughtfully chosen book

Choosing a book for someone requires attention. Whether it’s a novel you believe they’ll get lost in or a subject aligned with their interests, it shows that you understand how their mind works. A book becomes a companion, and gifting one says, I see what inspires you, and I want to share that with you.

Sending fresh flowers

Flowers chosen with intention—because they reflect a favourite scent, colour, or mood—become sensory expressions of care. They brighten spaces, linger in memory, and offer a quiet reminder that someone was thinking of them. Even after they fade, the sentiment remains.

Planning a surprise coffee date

A surprise coffee date may seem simple, but it’s deeply personal. It’s about carving out time, creating closeness, and turning the ordinary into something meaningful. These moments, though unassuming, often become the most cherished.

Digital pebbling

Sharing music with intention

Sending someone a song is a deeply intimate act. Each track is chosen for how it feels, what it recalls, or what it quietly communicates. Music becomes emotional shorthand—a way to express affection, longing, or understanding when words fall short.

Using emojis to express emotion

Emojis may be small, but they can carry immense emotional weight. A single symbol can soften a message, convey warmth, or express feelings too tender to spell out. In their simplicity, they often speak more honestly than words.

Sending articles, news, or recommendations

Sharing content tied to a shared interest or something the recipient is passionate about shows attentiveness. It’s a way of saying, I pay attention to what matters to you, even in passing moments.

Tagging and interacting online

Tagging someone in a post that reflects an inside joke or shared sentiment is a modern form of connection. It’s playful, public yet personal, and rooted in shared understanding. These small interactions reinforce bonds in subtle but meaningful ways.

Pros of Pebbling

1. Strengthens Introverted Relationships

Pebbling helps introverted relationships grow because it offers connection without pressure. For introverts, long conversations or constant interaction can feel draining, even with people they care about. Pebbling—sharing small messages, links, photos, or thoughts—creates a gentle way to stay close.

It gives just enough interaction to feel seen and understood, without becoming overwhelming. Since there’s no need to reply right away, both people can engage when they feel ready and emotionally available. This slow, flexible exchange builds warmth and trust over time, letting relationships bloom naturally and comfortably.

2. Security Matters

When partners practise pebbling—those small, thoughtful gestures that say “I’m thinking of you”—it quietly builds a deep sense of security in the relationship. Over time, these little acts add up, reassuring each person that they matter and that the bond is steady, not fragile. When you know your partner is reliably attentive and emotionally present, doubts lose their sharp edge and uncertainty doesn’t get much room to grow.

This feeling of safety makes it easier to lower one’s guard, to speak honestly about fears, needs, and imperfections without worrying about judgment or withdrawal. In such an atmosphere, conversations become kinder and conflicts less threatening, because both partners are anchored in the belief that they are on the same side. Pebbling, in its gentle way, turns everyday care into a strong foundation for trust, openness, and healthier ways of working through disagreements together.

3. Keeps The Romance Alive

When you first meet someone and sparks fly, everything feels electric—those butterflies, that slightly unreal happiness—but as time passes, that intensity naturally softens. The so-called honeymoon phase fades, not because love disappears, but because life settles in. This is where pebbling quietly works its magic. Pebbling is about those small, thoughtful gestures that say I see you—a note slipped onto the fridge, a song shared for no reason, a favourite snack brought home unexpectedly.

These acts may seem simple, almost insignificant, yet they carry a gentle power. They keep surprise alive, nurture warmth, and remind both partners that affection doesn’t need grand declarations to feel profound. Especially in moments of loneliness or when doubts creep in and fears of drifting apart arise, pebbling rekindles emotional closeness. It reassures, without drama, that love is still present—steady, attentive, and deeply felt—woven into the everyday fabric of the relationship.

4. Stressbuster

Life can get relentlessly hectic, and when pressures pile up, they have a way of seeping into our closest relationships. This is where pebbling comes in, quietly and kindly. Pebbling—those small, thoughtful gestures or gentle words—acts like a pause button on stress. A warm message, a shared joke, a cup of tea placed without being asked: these modest acts ease tension and remind two people that they are seen and cared for.

Over time, such moments build an emotional cushion, making love feel steadier and more secure. Couples who practice pebbling often find that disagreements lose their sharp edges; patience comes more easily, empathy flows more freely, and conflicts are approached not as battles to be won but as conversations to be resolved. In its unassuming way, pebbling restores calm, reinforces connection, and helps love endure the daily wear and tear of life.

Cons of Pebbling

• Pebbling can replace real communication by keeping things light while avoiding deeper conversations.
• It can create mismatched expectations when one person reads more meaning into it than the other.
• It can start to feel like pressure when replying becomes an unspoken obligation.
• It can mask low effort by substituting memes for actual follow-through.
• It can trigger attachment issues if one person overthinks while the other feels overwhelmed.
• It can stall progress by keeping the connection indirect and undefined.

In a nutshell, pebbling is about showing love through small, thoughtful gestures that build closeness, security, and warmth. When done mindfully, it keeps romance alive and reduces stress. But balance matters—pebbling should support, not replace, honest communication and genuine effort in relationships.

Key Marriage & Relationship Tips by Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo

Ask anyone if love in an arranged marriage is feasible, and the chances are high that you will hear them quip that ‘love’ and ‘arranged’ are as distant as night and day. The typical wisdom of the 21st century leans towards the argument that in order to have love in marriage, you need to first fall in love. In spite of the high number of opinions, though, it has been observed that arranged marriages have substantial success in India, even though many live with the perception that it is a ‘forced marriage’. Despite all, Indians still prefer getting hitched the good and old arranged way.

The question arises is if an arranged marriage really works, then how long does it take for the couple to fall in love? To be honest, there are no fixed formulas. But there are a few conditions and preconditions that may help you to fall in love at lightning speed.

In this article, Delhi’s top marriage counsellor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo talks about how to fall in love in an arranged marriage.

You Had Arranged Dating

This is an IDEAL way of making sure that you are in love in an arranged marriage, with your to-be life partner, before you actually tie the knot. Arranged dating is normally the dates you go on during the phase that falls between your engagement and wedding, or once your wedding is finalised. Because it is an arranged marriage, you have the complete consent of your family members, and therefore, you can feel comfortable yet secure when on such dates.

In case you are someone who is planning to tie the knot soon, you can request an ‘engagement-wedding’ combo so that you get some time in between to know your partner well and maybe discuss post-marriage issues as well.

You Express Your Heart Out To Your Life Partner

You have no reluctance about sharing your shady past because you feel your partner has the right to know it. At the same time, you are not about your other half for their back story; rather, you allow things to go with the flow.

This is a hallmark of a successful marriage, which is made of two individuals who trust (more about it later) and love each other. Be transparent, speak your heart out, share your thoughts, and you will realise you have developed enough love to make everyone around to believe you had a mushy love marriage.

You Share the Same Passion

This must be the ticket to love in an arranged marriage, and followed up by matrimonial bliss since both of you are on the same page. If she is into bird watching and you remotely endorse it, then this is the time you cultivate that hobby as well, so that you can hit a common note with her.

Sharing and having the same passion is certainly going to bring you closer, eventually making you fall for each other. But it is not necessary that you always need to be compatible in terms of likes and dislikes.

Dedicate Time to Each Other’s Hobbies

Instead of putting up an act of how much you loathe some of your partner’s hobbies, take out time and effort to adopt them yourself. If he enjoys playing games on PlayStation, sit with him and ask him to tell you about the game controllers and teach you.

You will just establish your place in his heart forever, girl! Even a slight display of approval to your partner’s hobbies is the best way to fall in love in an arranged marriage, while you are still figuring out each other.

You Give Each Other Independence

Definitely, it is great to do bird watching and gaming together, but no one requires a clingy life partner. In fact, the most loving relationships are those where the partners who give some ‘separate and away’ time to each other with respect and honour.

Always bear in mind that you are two individuals who have your very own social circles and obligations. Letting your partner have their ME time is the best way to make your love stronger. Your relationship will then be like the two ends of a rubber band; the farther they are stretched, the stronger they come back towards each other.

Trust and Mutual Respect Is At The Core Of Your Relationship

When you see each other from the corner of the eye just to keep a watch on each other? Now, this is a lack of trust and respect. Trust should be an element constituting the bond between both of you and trust itself must be backed by mutual respect if you want love in an arranged marriage.

Arranged marriages are infamous for situations where the husband forcibly avails his ‘husband rights’, while the wife always has the ‘who was she?’ question on the tip of her tongue. Make it a habit to never discount or downgrade your respect and trust for each other, which will eventually form the base of your mutual love.

Learn Things and Help Each Other

You provide a helping hand to your partner with zeal and promptness, and you will have your partner more than impressed; absolutely flattered, maybe. It will also make your tag of being a truly loving life partner and not just someone is thrown into a sphere of matrimony because it was all arranged. Bring some love to your partner, and you will realise that you just brought a perception shift in the drab image of arranged marriage.

You Invest Good Time to Understand Each Other

– Important Relationship Advice Shared by Marriage Counsellor Shivani Misri Sadhoo

The love between you and your special one may be flowing smoothly at the moment, but if you want it to continue the same way, it will help to take stock of possible bad habits that could destroy your relationship if you allow them. Even the best of romantic bonds has scope for improvement, so why not analyze your situation for signs of habits that can have tendencies to sabotage your relationship and kick them out before they even get the chance to destroy a good thing?

If you spot them early, you can nullify these bad habits and avoid unintentionally screwing up your relationship. Honestly, there is no better incentive than to do a check-in with your partner to ensure your romance is as healthy as possible.

Delhi’s top marriage counsellor and relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo talks about habits that can destroy your relationship if you allow them.

Assuming You Know How Your Partner Feels

You notice that suddenly your partner walked in the room looking gloomy, so naturally, that meant they were unreasonably miffed at you for something you probably did not do. Before you know it, you have launched into defensive mode, and instead of helping to remove the bad vibes, you have managed to spread them, making both you and your partner feel bad.

You should be aware that making assumptions can be damaging to our relationships because they never allow partners to share their situation, which makes them feel unheard.

Refusing To Accept Criticism

It can be really hard to take criticism from the one you love the most, particularly when you see all the shortcomings they have yet to work on. And absolutely no one wants to hear about all the those they mess up constantly.

But if your partner is trying to give you some constructive feedback about where they see an area for improvement in the relationship, ignoring their suggestion could possibly lead them to have disrespect for you, which can ultimately break down the bond you share.

Not Communicating Openly About Sex

You need to understand that, supposedly, the amazing thing you do in bed is actually a major turn-off to your partner, but you or your partner is too uncomfortable to address it. Whatever it requires, talking to your partner openly about your sex life is the only option to improve it. Otherwise, you will continue to suffer in silence and the unaddressed matter could strongly destroy what was once a good thing.

Suppressing Your Anger

As a couple, you often think that things are going great between you and your beloved, and you simply do not want to ruin them by bringing up some unpleasant stuff that could lead to a tense argument. You need to know that being angry is not always a bad thing to do. At times, if you are angry can help you share your concerns. It can disallow others from walking all over you. It can motivate you to do something positive. The key is managing your anger in the correct way.

Keeping Score

Not only is this tiresome and nitpicky, but it also shows that you do not trust your partner to carry their weight in the relationship. If you feel it necessary to monitor everything your partner does (or do not do) in order to make sure you are being treated fairly, you could be the obstacle in your relationship.

Not Fighting Fair

Silent treatments, gaslighting, stonewalling or yelling during an argument will certainly wear down even the best of partners. If you say you love a person, then those feelings should still be evident even when you are not getting along. Using manipulation tactics will only alienate you and guarantee that whatever rift you are experiencing will only grow further.

Frequently Raking Up The Past

If you cannot let go of what occurred in the past, your relationship could be history sooner or later. Being obsessed with prior arguments or lapse your partner made makes it very difficult to move forward. Consider consulting a couple’s therapist to work through your problems healthily so you can both approach the future with a clear mind.

Not Allowing Your Partner Personal Space

Quelling your partner because you are worried, they will leave you is one simple way to take your relationship from good to bad and then to non-existent. In fact, giving your partner space is more important for a couple’s happiness and contentment than enjoying a great sex life.

P.S. If you are in a relationship with someone you truly love and respect, the last thing you want on your conscience is realizing that you allowed a fixable bad habit to destroy your relationship.

Sometimes people can be surrounded by their spouse, kids, friends, and in-laws and still amongst all these people, deep down underneath they may be living a lonely life. Loneliness can come not only in absence of physical company but also when you don’t feel connected with the people you are living with.

When your spouse and kids are too busy and too focused & busy in their own lives that they just see you a part of the house and not part of themselves, then loneliness can turn into a real burden. It can leave you not knowing how to make things good? Should you try to talk to our partner? Or whatever causes this sense of loneliness makes it difficult? Apart from leaving you feeling isolated, loneliness can also make you feel vulnerable.

Eminent Marriage Counselor (Delhi) and Relationship expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares 5 pointers which state how to respond to loneliness in an Indian marriage. Here they are:

1.      Learn How To Apply ASLAN To Your Marriage

The big lesson which we need to learn in life right now is accepting circumstances and people the way they are. You should practice ASLAN, which stands for Acceptance, Surrender, Live And Know, this is the way it is supposed to be. ASLAN may not make sense to you, but the bottom line is that accepting your lonely marriage is the first step to coping with it. Instead of resisting your loneliness or hoping things were different, you need to accept that your marriage the way it is.

2.      Cope With Your Loneliness In Healthy Manner

You need to take care of your own emotional and social needs. If you are married and lonely, you may need to create relationships outside of your marriage irrespective of your spouse is willing to build a better marriage with you or not. You may need to make friends by doing volunteer work, joining recreational clubs or hiking groups, joining a sports or spiritual organization, or taking continuing education classes. Test yourself by pursuing a different career or going back to school.

3.      Accept What You Wish Your Spouse Could Give You

Do you want your spouse to support you, have more sex with you, speak to you, or give you company to events or functions? What do you want from your spouse? Before you learn how to cope with a lonely marriage, you need to figure out what you’re missing. It’s essential to accept that you’re married and isolated, but you also need to be certain about what you want from your partner. He/she may not be able to give you what you need, but you need to be clear on what you want or expect.

 4.      Realize That Married Yet Alone Frequently Go Hand In Hand

What are your expectations from your marriage and your partner? A friendless marriage is something we all cope with from time to time, but it’s not as complicated when we expect to be. Our partners can’t be there for us all the time. If your spouse is never there for you or is emotionally abusive. You may need to pull away, in order to protect yourself.

5.      Practice The Skills Of Enjoying Your Own Company

We often feel that he/she isn’t comfortable being alone because he/she feels uncertain and lost. People haven’t found themselves, their identity, self-confidence. They haven’t learned to enjoy their own company and more significantly they haven’t learned how to take care of their own needs. People are setting themselves up to cope with a lonely marriage because they expect too much from their partner.