Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

When two people fall in love, what’s the first thing that connects them?

Is it the mind — where curiosity turns into comfort, where a stranger begins to feel familiar long before the heart catches up? Or is it that unexplainable physical pull that draws you closer before you even know why?

Honestly, it’s often our minds that meet first. Our emotions translate what words can’t — that quiet spark of recognition when a thought mirrors your own, when laughter feels shared rather than offered, when silence doesn’t demand filling. That’s the magic, isn’t it? Two minds leaning toward each other long before the souls follow and the hearts understand what’s unfolding.

But what happens when that same person — the one who once understood your pauses and lit up your brightest thoughts — turns distant? When warmth turns to indifference, and the shared language of love fades into one-word replies? When the home you built together feels more like a waiting room where no one calls your name?

Yes, we are talking about Emotional Abandonment — what it really is, and how to walk through it without losing yourself says Shivani Misri Sadhoo who is one of the most experienced couples therapist in Delhi, India.

What is Emotional Abandonment?

Sometimes, even in a marriage that is built on trust, communication, patience, and more importantly love, life has a way of making people drift without realizing it. Work pressure, family duties, the everyday hustle and bustle — they all add up, and slowly, two people who once felt like they were in a “made-for-each-other” kind of relationship become emotionally alien to each other. Then there are times when the emotional disconnect isn’t transient. The person who loved you so much, stops caring about your feelings.

There is a great wall of silence that rises between you and your spouse. And, even though you’re under the same roof, it feels like you’re worlds apart — sharing space, but not a life. You feel unheard, unseen, almost invisible in a space that was once safe. Over time, that emotional gap turns into isolation and deep loneliness. This isn’t just distance — it’s emotional abandonment, a painful place where support fades, connection breaks down, and love feels like it’s there in name but missing in presence. It can happen over the years or all of a sudden. But whenever it happens, it hurts!

Why Does It Happen?

Some of the reasons this happens are:

Too Busy

We are living in an era where life spins endlessly in the orbit of busyness — where married couples, caught in the rush, slowly drift apart, and emotional abandonment takes root in the silence between them. Initially, they try to make it up by going for a late night coffee date or a weekend plan. But as time goes by, those gestures become band-aids on widening cracks. The late-night coffees turn into hurried takeaways, weekend plans become postponed promises, and conversations shrink into logistics — bills, schedules, responsibilities. What once felt like partnership now feels like parallel lives: two people moving in the same space yet rarely meeting in spirit. This takes a heavy toll on their emotional landscape-a slow erosion rather than a sudden collapse.

Negative Experiences of Childhood

Sometimes, childhood experiences like neglect, abuse, or losing a caregiver can quietly shape how we love later in life. These can unknowingly lead to feelings of distrust, fear of getting hurt, and anxiety around closeness. A person may cling when they feel insecure or pull away to protect themselves. Without meaning to, they may create distance in the relationships they care about most, wanting connection but struggling to feel safe in it.

Money Matters

Sometimes constant financial stress and job insecurity can quietly strain a relationship. Your mind is more focused on solving financial problems and hence there is no room for emotional attachment. As time goes by, this constant state of worry takes a toll on their emotional relationship. When that happens, feelings of neglect and abandonment grow.

Personality Mismatch

One more reason for emotional abandonment comes from differences in personality. Some people are naturally introverted and prefer space, quiet, and time alone to recharge. Others are more expressive and seek frequent emotional connection. When these needs don’t match, misunderstandings grow. The introverted person may feel overwhelmed, while the other feels ignored or unloved. Over time, this gap in communication and emotional style can quietly push partners apart, creating distance without anyone meaning to.

Is there a solution to this problem? Let’s find out.

Ways To navigate emotional abandonment

Recognise The Problem

The first step should be to recognise the problem. There is no point dilly-dallying when you already feel the distance creeping in and hurting your relationship. Don’t you want to feel close and happy again? So go ahead and acknowledge that this emotional detachment is slowly building walls between you both. Once you name it, you can face it, talk honestly, and slowly reconnect instead of drifting apart.

Communication is Key

Communicate. Real communication is a two-way flow — you listen, you speak honestly, and you face what hurts instead of running from it. The more you talk, the lighter you feel, because sharing loosens the weight you’ve been carrying inside. Emotional abandonment begins to heal when two partners stay present, open up, and keep showing up with truth and patience. If you don’t express what’s hurting you inside, how will your partner ever know? Speak, release the unspoken, and let honesty bring you back to each other.

The Magic of Time

They say time is the greatest healer, so give it the space it needs. When you and your spouse feel emotionally detached, be patient and gentle with yourselves. Take it slow, stay steady in your efforts, and keep showing up even when progress feels small. Miracles do not happen overnight; time and steady intention soften wounds, rebuild trust, and slowly revive connection. With patience, honest effort, and a calm heart, emotional abandonment in marriage can gradually give way to closeness once again.

Spend Quality Time Together

Try giving sweet surprises to your better half. Plan a weekend trip to the place where you first met and relive those precious moments. You could also try something new together, like a fun activity or a creative workshop you both enjoy. The whole idea is to spend real quality time together—switch off your phone, disconnect from the outside world, and reconnect with each other. These simple efforts strengthen your emotional bond by reminding you both that love is not just spoken but shown through presence and intention.

Professional Guidance Helps

Sometimes professional guidance truly helps. A third person can counsel you in a neutral manner, seeing the situation from an outside perspective without judgment. A therapist or marriage counsellor uses specific tools and techniques to address the issues that are emotionally hurting both partners. Their support creates a safe space to express feelings, understand unmet needs, and rebuild trust. This process is especially helpful for healing emotional abandonment in a marriage, as it encourages reconnection, healthy communication, and renewed emotional presence.

Life is full of surprises — some lift us, some test us. Emotional distance can feel heavy, but it’s not the final chapter. When we notice the disconnect, speak openly, give time, create meaningful moments, and seek guidance when needed, love finds its way back. Healing begins when both hearts choose to stay present.

In any healthy relationship—whether romantic, familial, or friendship—boundaries play a crucial role in maintaining mutual respect and emotional safety. Without boundaries, even the strongest relationships can become strained, leading to misunderstandings, resentment, or burnout. Boundaries are not walls that keep people out—they are guidelines that define how we want to be treated and how we treat others, says Shivani Misri Sadhoo, who is India’s top couples and marriage counselor in this blog.

What Do Boundaries in a Relationship Refer To?

Boundaries in a relationship refer to the limits and expectations that partners set to protect their emotional, physical, and mental well-being. They define what is acceptable and what isn’t in terms of behavior, communication, and personal space. Boundaries ensure that both individuals feel respected, valued, and safe, preventing one person from overpowering or neglecting the other.

For example, setting boundaries might mean communicating honestly about personal needs, maintaining privacy, saying “no” without guilt, or ensuring equal effort in emotional or physical intimacy. They create balance—allowing closeness without losing individuality.

How to Set Healthy Boundaries in a Relationship?

Know Yourself First
Understand your values, comfort zones, and emotional triggers. You can’t set boundaries if you don’t know what you need to feel secure and respected.

Communicate Clearly and Calmly
Express your boundaries openly and respectfully. Instead of blaming or accusing, use “I” statements like “I feel uncomfortable when…” or “I need some alone time to recharge.”

Be Consistent
Once you set a boundary, maintain it. Inconsistency can confuse your partner and weaken the respect for your limits.

Respect Your Partner’s Boundaries Too
Boundaries are mutual. Just as you expect your limits to be respected, you should honor your partner’s as well. Listen and adjust when needed.

Don’t Feel Guilty About Setting Limits
Healthy boundaries don’t make you selfish—they make you emotionally mature. They show you value yourself and your relationship enough to keep it balanced.

Boundaries are the foundation of trust and respect in every relationship. They help both partners grow individually while nurturing their bond together. Without them, love can quickly turn into control, dependency, or emotional exhaustion. Setting boundaries is not about distance—it’s about creating the right space where love, respect, and understanding can thrive.

Intimacy is a cornerstone of any relationship, but men and women experience and express it differently. These differences are rooted in emotional, physical, and psychological factors that shape their desires and expectations.

Below are five key points each on what men and women want in intimacy, shedding light on their unique perspectives as explained by one of the leading marriage counselors in India Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this article.

What Men Want in Intimacy?

Some of the things men want are:

Initiating  Physical Intimacy

Men often prefer to take the lead in initiating physical intimacy. This stems from a combination of biological factors like higher testosterone levels and a desire to feel confident and wanted in the relationship.

Physical Connection as a Primary Need

Men frequently associate intimacy with physical touch and connection.  Physical activities like hugging, and other forms of physical affection are vital for them to feel loved and emotionally close to their partner.

Respect and Appreciation

Feeling respected and appreciated by their partner significantly enhances a man’s sense of intimacy. Compliments, acknowledgment of their efforts, and expressions of admiration make them feel valued.

Simple and Direct Communication

Men often prefer clear and straightforward communication when it comes to emotional or intimate needs. Subtle cues or hints can be overlooked, so direct conversations help them feel more connected and assured.

Bonding Through Activities

Engaging in shared activities, such as sports, hobbies, or even working on a project together, is a way men build intimacy. These moments of teamwork or companionship make them feel closer to their partner.

What Women Want in Intimacy?

A few things women desire are:

Emotional Connection Before Physical Intimacy

For many women, emotional intimacy is a prerequisite for physical closeness. Feeling understood, supported, and secure in the relationship creates the foundation for a deeper connection.

Affection Beyond the Bedroom

Women appreciate consistent acts of affection that aren’t necessarily tied to physical intimacy. Holding hands, cuddling, and thoughtful gestures help them feel loved and valued in everyday moments.

Quality Time and Undivided Attention

Women often place high importance on spending meaningful time together. Uninterrupted conversations, shared experiences, and moments of togetherness foster emotional closeness.

Being Heard and Validated

Women want their thoughts and feelings to be genuinely heard and validated. A partner who listens with empathy and acknowledges their emotions helps build trust and intimacy.

Consistency and Reassurance

Consistency in behavior and emotional availability is crucial for women. Knowing they can rely on their partner’s love and support gives them the confidence to open up fully.

Bridging the Gap

Men’s tendency to initiate physical intimacy and women’s need for emotional connection before physical closeness can sometimes create misunderstandings. However, these differences are complementary when couples communicate openly.

For instance, a woman can appreciate her partner’s desire to initiate intimacy, while a man can focus on creating an emotionally secure environment for his partner.

Understanding what men and women want in intimacy reveals how their needs, though distinct, often align to form a balanced and fulfilling relationship.

By respecting each other’s perspectives—whether it’s through emotional connection, physical affection, or acts of love—couples can strengthen their bond and create lasting intimacy. Embracing these differences not only enhances understanding but also deepens the connection that lies at the heart of a strong relationship.

Falling in love often feels effortless, filled with shared moments and joy. But when distance becomes part of the equation, nurturing that love demands patience, trust, and unwavering commitment. Long-distance relationships are undoubtedly challenging, trading spontaneous coffee dates and evening strolls for late-night calls and virtual hugs. Yet, they offer invaluable lessons about love, commitment, and ourselves.

What are the important things a long-distance relationship teaches you?

Let’s explore five key lessons a long-distance relationship teaches, as shared by India’s renowned marriage and relationship counselor, Shivani Misri Sadhoo.

Time Is Valuable

A long-distance relationship reveals the fleeting nature of time and teaches us to cherish moments with our loved ones. While physical separation limits shared activities, it emphasizes emotional investment, open sharing, and attentive listening. In today’s digital age, where connections often feel superficial, long-distance relationships foster meaningful bonds through intentional conversations and deep understanding. Moments of connection—whether a heartfelt conversation or a virtual meal—become precious reminders to value the time spent with those we love.

The Art of Patience

Living apart requires an exceptional level of patience. Unlike proximity-based relationships, where instant gratification is common, long-distance relationships teach us to wait. There are times when your partner may not answer a call—not out of neglect but due to circumstances like work or travel. These moments test your ability to trust and manage misunderstandings. The prolonged wait for visits or responses often feels unbearable, but it fosters endurance, hope, and resilience. This learned patience not only strengthens your bond but also cultivates a broader life skill: appreciating delayed gratification and embracing the joy of reunions.

The Importance of Communication

Communication forms the backbone of any relationship, but its importance is magnified in long-distance setups. Being apart compels couples to practice clarity, honesty, and regular interaction. Miscommunication or withholding feelings can lead to unnecessary complications, making transparency essential. Effective communication strengthens emotional bonds, resolves conflicts, and builds trust, minimizing negative feelings. Sharing experiences, beliefs, and expectations bridges the physical gap, ensuring that emotional intimacy flourishes despite the miles.

Trust Becomes Essential

Trust is vital in any relationship, but in a long-distance dynamic, it takes center stage. Physical separation can breed uncertainty, yet this distance pushes couples to rely on trust more than ever. Gestures of love, honest communication, and patience become the foundation of emotional security. Trusting in your partner’s actions, promises, and intentions helps navigate the challenges of being apart. Setting boundaries and clear expectations further strengthens this trust, creating a secure and respectful space. Long-distance relationships demonstrate that trust transcends proximity—it’s about emotional assurance and belief in the relationship’s strength.

You Learn to Appreciate Each Other

Distance has a way of amplifying appreciation for your partner. When physically close, it’s easy to overlook gestures or become frustrated by quirks. However, separation sharpens your focus on the qualities and actions that make your partner special. The absence of their touch, voice, or presence makes their value unmistakably clear. Things once taken for granted, like a simple conversation or a laugh, gain profound significance. This newfound perspective fosters deeper gratitude and highlights the importance of the little things in a relationship.

Long-distance relationships are undeniably challenging, but they bring invaluable rewards. They teach us to treasure time, master patience, communicate effectively, build trust, and deeply appreciate our partners. Despite the obstacles, these relationships strengthen emotional connections and encourage us to value every shared moment, proving that love can thrive even across great distances.

Gone are the days when we celebrated milestones privately with friends and family. Social media has transformed how we connect, and now a simple post or story often replaces intimate gatherings. While social media offers a convenient way to share our lives, it can blur the lines between what should remain private and what we choose to make public.

What things should you not post about your relationship on social media?

Relationship expert and Delhi’s leading marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo, warns against oversharing, as it can sometimes harm the very relationships we’re trying to celebrate. Here are six things you should avoid sharing about your relationship online:

Avoid Seeking External Validation

Your relationship doesn’t need public approval to be meaningful. Constantly posting about it for likes or comments can add unnecessary pressure and reflect insecurity. Healthy relationships thrive privately without the need for a social media audience. Sharing too much can force emotions to grow based on external validation rather than letting love develop naturally between you two.

Get Your Partner’s Consent

Sharing photos or personal details about your partner without their approval can invade their privacy. Just because you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean you can share everything publicly. Always ask for your partner’s consent before tagging them in posts or sharing pictures. Respecting their comfort level is crucial to building trust and ensuring they feel valued. By doing so, you also strengthen your bond by showing that their opinions matter.

Don’t Post About Conflicts

Every relationship has disagreements, but venting about arguments on social media is a bad idea. Sharing conflicts publicly can hurt your partner and lead others to form negative opinions about your relationship. Online advice from friends, though well-meaning, may also cause more harm than good. Instead, resolve issues privately with your partner. Posting in moments of anger can lead to regret and long-term damage to the relationship.

Don’t Brag About Gifts

While it’s exciting to receive gifts, constantly posting them on social media can come across as bragging. Your partner might prefer to keep these moments private and may feel uncomfortable with the attention. Plus, trying to make your relationship appear more extravagant than it is can create pressure and unrealistic expectations. Instead of sharing every gift online, cherish these moments together without seeking validation from others.

Limit Frequent Status Updates

Constantly updating your relationship status online—whether it’s changing from single to in a relationship or making it “complicated”—can create unnecessary pressure. While it may feel gratifying at the moment, these updates often reflect instability and invite unwanted opinions from others. Focus on nurturing your relationship privately rather than publicly broadcasting each shift in your love life. What truly matters is the bond you share, not how others perceive it.

Don’t Post About Your Breakup

Breakups are hard enough without adding the complexity of social media. Posting about a breakup can lead to endless questions and amplify your feelings of sadness. Not everyone will respond positively, and you may regret sharing such a personal event. Instead, focus on healing privately and avoid publicizing the details of your breakup.

Let your relationship thrive away from the public eye. Avoid seeking external validation, sharing conflicts, or posting frequent updates. Respect your partner’s privacy and cherish special moments privately. Remember, the strength of your relationship lies in the bond you share, not in how it appears on social media.

Money plays a pivotal role in relationships, and significant income disparity can sometimes lead to feelings of resentment. While financial differences are common, the key to avoiding resentment is fostering understanding, communication, and mutual respect between partners.

How can you navigate this sensitive issue without causing tension in your relationship?

Shivani Misri Sadhoo, one of the top couples therapists in Delhi and Gurgaon explains how to deal with such a scenario in this blog.

Open and Honest Communication

The foundation of any healthy relationship is communication. If one partner earns significantly more, it’s important to have open conversations about finances. Discuss how the income disparity makes both of you feel. Some may experience feelings of inadequacy or frustration, while others may feel overwhelmed by financial responsibility. Talking about these feelings in a non-judgmental way helps both partners understand each other’s perspectives, creating a sense of emotional safety.

Tip: Set aside time for regular money conversations, where both partners can share their thoughts and goals.

Avoid Power Imbalance

One of the main triggers of resentment is when the higher-earning partner holds financial control or power over the other. This can create a dynamic where the lower-earning partner feels dependent, leading to frustration. To avoid this, both partners should feel like they have an equal say in financial decisions, even if the contributions are unequal.

Tip: Create a shared budget where both partners contribute proportionally based on their income. This ensures fairness while maintaining financial equity in the relationship.

Respect Each Other’s Contributions

Money isn’t the only contribution that matters in a relationship. The partner who earns less may still be contributing in significant ways, such as taking care of the household, managing family responsibilities, or providing emotional support. It’s important to value these non-financial contributions and acknowledge them as equally important to the partnership.

Tip: Express appreciation for the unique strengths and efforts each person brings to the relationship, regardless of income.

Set Mutual Financial Goals

Working towards common financial goals helps both partners feel aligned, regardless of their individual incomes. Whether it’s saving for a vacation, a house, or retirement, setting goals together creates a sense of partnership. Both partners can contribute in ways that feel meaningful to them, fostering a feeling of teamwork.

Tip: Review your financial goals as a couple regularly, making sure both partners are actively involved in the planning and decision-making.

Focus on the Bigger Picture

Income differences should not overshadow the love and commitment you share. Avoid comparing your financial situation to others or using money as a measure of success in your relationship. Instead, focus on what truly matters—emotional connection, mutual respect, and shared values. When you concentrate on the strengths of your relationship, the income disparity becomes less significant.

Tip: Celebrate the milestones you achieve together as a couple, no matter how big or small.

Navigating income disparity in a relationship requires effort from both partners. By focusing on communication, mutual respect, and shared goals, couples can avoid resentment and build a stronger partnership. Remember, it’s not the amount of money that determines the success of a relationship, but the way you manage it together.

Why is it that finding love often feels like stumbling through a maze blindfolded? We all have our preferences, our checkboxes, and our ideal visions of a perfect partner. Yet, despite our best efforts, we often find ourselves making mistakes along the way.

What kind of mistakes do we make while looking for love?

Let’s get to know about the same from India’s leading marriage counselor, Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

Having Great Expectations

Perhaps one of the biggest mistakes people make when searching for love is having oversized expectations. They hope for a fairy-tale romance without any hiccups. But always remember that real relationships require effort. We often pressure ourselves to find love by a certain deadline and rush to advance to the next stage within a specific timeline.

However, each relationship and person is unique, so our expectations going into dating shouldn’t be the same for everyone we meet; everyone is on their own path. Instead of imposing deadlines, we should be open and accepting of ‘what will be, will be’ and enjoy the moment. Putting pressure on ourselves takes away the fun and thrills that dating can offer.

Impatience

There’s no point in rushing into relationships as they often lead to trouble. It’s tempting to dive in headfirst, but ignoring red flags can spell disaster. Patience is key; good things take time. Let things evolve naturally, truly understanding your partner and their values before making big commitments. Chemistry trumps passion for longevity. A strong connection ensures a healthier, longer-lasting relationship. So, take it slow and let love blossom at its own pace.

Focusing on External Appearance

Sometimes, on our quest for true love, we get caught up in the glitz and glamour of external appearances, forgetting to delve deeper into the essence of the person we’ve fallen for. It’s easy to be drawn in by good looks or charm, but true connection lies in understanding and appreciating the inner beauty that defines a person.

By solely focusing on superficial qualities, we risk missing out on the qualities that truly matter – kindness, empathy, intelligence, and shared values. These are the qualities that create a strong and enduring bond, making the pursuit of superficial attributes a big mistake in the search for genuine love.

Lack of Self-awareness

Another mistake people often make while looking for true love is neglecting to understand themselves. Failing to delve into self-discovery and grasp their values, goals, and desires from a relationship can hinder the journey toward finding genuine love. It’s essential to explore one’s own love stories, identify the qualities and traits that resonate with them, and understand their patterns of thought and behavior in relationships.

Without this self-awareness, individuals may struggle to make informed choices when selecting potential partners, resulting in incompatible relationships. Understanding oneself better empowers individuals to navigate the complexities of love and make decisions aligned with their long-term vision for a fulfilling relationship.

Seeking Validation

Are you in search of true love only because you want to feel important or to be noticed? Seeking validation from friends, family, or a partner is a big mistake. It leads to unhealthy dependency and unhappiness. True love should complement your life, not define it entirely. Before searching for love, love and fulfill yourself first.

Seeking external validation can lead to low self-esteem. You might start relying on others’ recognition and approval to feel good about yourself. Over time, you could lose sight of your own value and strength.

Overlooking Red Flags

When you’re in search of true love, ignoring red flags is a significant mistake. These warning signs, such as inconsistent behaviour, lack of communication, or unresolved issues from the past, indicate underlying problems or compatibility mismatches that can lead to future turmoil and heartbreak. By overlooking these signals, you risk wasting time and emotional energy on relationships that may not be right for you.

It’s crucial to pay attention to your intuition and address red flags early on, as they can protect you from entering into unhealthy or unfulfilling connections. Recognizing and addressing these warning signs allows you to make informed decisions, fostering healthier relationships built on trust, respect, and mutual understanding.

There are more aspects to consider when seeking love, but avoiding common mistakes like unrealistic expectations and ignoring red flags can pave the way for genuine, fulfilling connections. Remember, patience, self-awareness, and authenticity are key to finding lasting love.

Relationships often confuse us. Sometimes, the one who captures our heart can be tender and affectionate, yet in the next moment, they may appear distant or even irritable. They might shower us with thoughtful gestures, only to disregard our desires when things don’t align with their expectations. This ambiguity leaves us questioning whether their intentions are genuine or if they’re merely toying with our feelings for their own gain.

Are you curious to know the signs that a man is using you?

Let’s find out from India’s leading marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo about these signs.

He has no interest in you

When a guy consistently shows disinterest in you and your life, it indicates he’s likely using you for his own benefit. Genuine interest in a partner involves wanting to know about their thoughts, feelings, and experiences. If he only engages with you when it serves his agenda or ignores your interests altogether, it’s a clear sign that he’s not invested in building a meaningful connection but rather exploiting your presence for personal gain.

He ignores you in front of others

If the man you love showers you with attention but suddenly ignores or avoids you in front of others, it’s a red flag. Pay close attention to how he treats you around people he knows. If he’s inconsistent, prioritizing his image over your feelings, he may be using you for his benefit. Genuine affection doesn’t fluctuate based on who’s watching. Trust your instincts and confront the situation honestly.

He is not really putting an effort

When you’re the only one making efforts in a relationship, it’s a telltale sign of being used. You’re constantly striving to maintain the connection while he shows little interest or willingness to reciprocate. It resembles a parasocial relationship, where you invest emotions, time, and energy, but he remains oblivious. Communication feels one-sided; he’s physically present but emotionally absent. You’re essentially talking to yourself, solving his problems, not yours.

He’s available as per his need/schedule

When someone’s always available on their terms but mysteriously busy when you need them, it’s a red flag. Genuine interest means being there through thick and thin, not just when it suits them. If your partner is consistently unavailable on weekends and only meets as per their schedule, it’s unfair. A serious relationship requires effort from both sides.

If they call all the shots and take you for granted, it’s a sign they might be using you. Evaluate your self-worth and make a decision. He intentionally makes plans with his friends or colleagues on weekends to stay away from you. Isn’t that a sign to consider?

Toxic manipulation

Manipulative behavior becomes evident when he dismisses your feelings, turning every disagreement into a blame game. Constantly undermining your confidence, he uses language to make you feel inadequate. Control dominates arguments, making it you versus him instead of addressing issues together.

He avoids responsibility by shifting blame, leaving you burdened with guilt. Gaslighting adds another layer, distorting truth and denying reality. This draining dynamic indicates he prioritizes personal gain over a healthy relationship, making it crucial to reassess the connection.

He doesn’t want to empathize with you

Empathy means understanding and sharing someone else’s feelings. Let’s say you’re feeling down after a tough day, and instead of offering support or showing concern, he brushes off your emotions or doesn’t even acknowledge them.

This lack of empathy suggests he’s more focused on his own needs and desires, using you as a means to an end rather than genuinely caring about your well-being. In essence, his actions reveal a self-centred nature, indicating he’s not genuinely invested in your happiness or fulfilment.

He needs monetary favor always

When your boyfriend consistently relies on you for financial support, often at inconvenient times, and fails to reciprocate in the relationship, it’s a clear sign of exploitation. His sudden sweetness when money is involved reveals his true intentions. You can tell that he is using you when his actions consistently prioritize his needs over yours, leaving you drained and unfulfilled. Recognizing this toxic dynamic is essential for reclaiming your worth and finding a healthier relationship.

Hence, in a nutshell, when someone shows consistent signs of disinterest, manipulation, and exploitation in a relationship, it’s time to reassess its value and prioritize your own well-being. Trust your instincts and choose a healthier path forward.

Marriage Counselor and Relationship Expert Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares some amazing tips for couples to nurture their relationship as parents

A baby brings boundless joy to new parents, for within their tiny form lies the miracle of life. While the demands of parenthood may challenge their time and energy, the flame of love between mom and dad can still persist.

Balancing the demands of parenthood and maintaining a strong connection with your partner requires effort and understanding. In this article, India’s top marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo offers some tips and tricks for nurturing your relationship as a new parent.

What are those ways to nurture your relationship as a parent?

Here, Shivani Sadhoo shares some of the methods, that could make your transition to parenthood a smooth ride.

Why Communicate with Compassion?

Effective communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship. As new parents, take time to listen to each other’s concerns, fears, and joys. Be mindful of your partner’s emotional needs and offer support and encouragement.

Choose your words carefully, speaking kindly and respectfully, even when fatigue and stress take hold. Remember, open and honest communication will help you navigate the challenges together and deepen your bond. When your baby cries, you’re compassionate. Extend that to your partner. Relationships change after a baby, but growth happens when you change together.

Do it together as a team

Parenthood is a team sport, and collaboration between partners is vital. Share the responsibilities of childcare and household chores, support each other’s needs, and find a balance that works for both of you. Recognize and appreciate each other’s contributions, acknowledging the value of teamwork in creating a harmonious environment for your family.

Nurture intimacy

After having a baby, physical and emotional intimacy can be neglected. Yet, it’s vital to prioritize a romantic connection. Make time for intimate moments like cuddling, date nights, or heartfelt conversations. Small gestures and expressions of love foster a strong bond.

Take care of yourself

Remember to take care of yourself amidst the demands of parenthood. It’s essential to nurture your own well-being, as it directly impacts your relationship with your partner. Prioritize self-care activities such as exercise, meditation, or pursuing hobbies that bring you joy. By taking care of yourself, you’ll have more energy and positivity to invest in your partnership.

Express appreciation

Show gratitude for each other’s efforts and support. Recognize and acknowledge the hard work and dedication that goes into being a parent. Small gestures of appreciation can go a long way in fostering a positive and nurturing environment.

The Power of Giving Space

Granting each other space as new parents fosters personal growth and maintains individuality. It involves recognizing the importance of alone time, pursuing hobbies, and nurturing friendships outside of parenthood, strengthening the partnership.

Conflict management

Managing conflicts effectively is crucial in any relationship, and this becomes even more challenging when you have a newborn due to the added stress and exhaustion. Use “I” statements to express how you feel, such as “I feel overwhelmed when…” or “I need support with…”. This can help avoid blaming and encourage understanding.

Seek Support

New parents often feel overwhelmed. Seek support from family, friends, or professionals. Connect with experienced parents, join groups, or consider couples counseling. Asking for help lightens the load and strengthens relationships.

Embrace Imperfections

Parenthood is a journey of constant learning and growth. Embrace the imperfections and understand that mistakes are inevitable. Be patient and forgiving with yourself and your partner. Celebrate the small victories, and remember that every day presents an opportunity to strengthen your bond and create beautiful memories together.

As you embark on the incredible journey of parenthood, remember that nurturing your relationship is just as important as caring for your little one. Enjoy this remarkable chapter of your lives, cherishing the moments of joy, and growing stronger as a couple with each passing day. And if you need any help, we are there to guide you. 

According to Eminent Marriage Counselor Shivani Sadhoo

Studies confirm the truth that in romance, the end is mostly predictable. The evidence indicates that the strongest sign that a romance is over is certainly not what a partner says or does, but how he makes the other one feel.

In simple words, Shivani Sadhoo says, if you sense your partner has moved on emotionally, he/she probably has. Although he/she might still perform the relational bare minimum, like dutifully calling every day, a partner’s “quiet quitting” might be obvious in other ways, like through the choice to increasingly make plans alone or with others. While it is tempting to wonder if you are “simply too sensitive,” or assume you should have done something to prompt your partner to pull away, actions speak louder than words—and a partner’s behavior speaks high volumes.

Lack of intimacy predicts a breakup

A top university investigated the connection between a lack of intimacy and the likelihood of relationship dissolution. They found that partners who perceived lower levels of reward in their relationship were more prone to head for a breakup. They found this effect was significant even post-controlling for relationship satisfaction and attachment insecurity.

Operationalizing reward in a manner that captures various features of intimacy like connection, love, and self-disclosure, the findings of the study validate the importance of intimacy within a romantic relationship, confirming previous findings that intimate connection is one of the core reasons people stay in a relationship. They also noticed that because there might be a difference in the extent to which a person values intimacy or considers it a “reward,” there might also be a difference in the reward’s predictive power for a breakup. They report that their exploratory analyses yielded assistance for this possibility by showcasing that reward did not predict breakup as strongly for those people who place less value on intimacy.

India’s top marriage counselor Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares some points that will help you to recognize the signs that the end is near in this blog.

Taking note of the presence or absence of the features of intimacy noted in the study like connection, love, and self-disclosure, could make it easier to observe when your partner is disengaging. Here are a few signs to look for.

Building up boundaries

Some partners start to withdraw by forming walls instead of bridges. This might occur physically, like when a partner seeks to spend more time in a different room, or emotionally, through reduced information sharing. However, it is manifest, forming boundaries is a roadblock to relational development, showcasing the beginning of a future apart.

Withdrawing affection

If your partner has lost interest in getting intimate and doing romance, you most probably want to know why. Barring significant life alterations like a cancer diagnosis, or the loss of a job or loved one, which could be associated with withdrawal and depression, withdrawing affection is mostly a sign that the relationship is faltering.

Looking for socialization

A partner who is cascading towards meeting new people or attending events solo might be showing a preference for singlehood. You can respectfully seek the queries into the reasons or rationale for the change in preference, but consider whether there would ever be an acceptable answer to the desire to spend time socializing without you.

Starting a new chapter

If your relationship does come to an end, bear in mind that a failed relationship is not the end of the world; rather, it might be the beginning of a fresh chapter in your life. There is nothing about romantic rejection that defines you; breakups happen to several people at some point, and various breakups have more to do with the partner who prompts the dissolution. If a breakup was actually, provoked by your behavior, you can learn from it and march on, stronger and wiser.