Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

No relationship is flawless. Even in the most loving partnerships, there will be moments when your partner hurts you—sometimes unintentionally, other times, it may feel more deliberate. Disagreements are inevitable, whether they’re about money, parenting, or personality clashes. What often turns minor conflicts into significant issues is when boundaries are crossed or ignored.

So, what do we do when conflict arises? Do we keep fighting, seek revenge, or find a way to forgive? Forgiveness doesn’t mean accepting wrongdoing. Instead, it allows you to let go of the pain, anger, and resentment, choosing healing over hurting. By forgiving, you help your relationship grow stronger.

What are the ways to forgive in relationships?

Leading marriage counselor in Delhi and Gurgaon Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares six steps to forgiveness in relationships.

Honest Communication

The first step toward forgiveness is having a heart-to-heart talk with your partner. Open and honest communication is essential for understanding what went wrong. Trust may feel shattered, like being caught in a storm, but discussing the situation helps you move forward. If your partner lied, ask why they hid the truth. If they became emotionally distant, explore why they felt unable to express their needs. Honest dialogue is the foundation for rebuilding trust and moving ahead together.

Look Within

Forgiveness is more about your healing than the other person’s actions. It involves releasing anger, pain, and resentment, but this shouldn’t be rushed. Take the time to process and heal before letting go of those emotions. Focus on what you can control—your own thoughts and actions. This may involve accepting your role in the conflict or recognizing that you need to shift your perspective. By looking within, you empower yourself to heal, regardless of what the other person does.

Embrace Empathy

Practicing empathy can help you better understand the other person’s perspective. Try to see the situation through their eyes. Ask yourself what might have influenced their actions—stress, personal struggles, or feeling overwhelmed. Considering their challenges may help you approach the issue with more understanding and patience. Empathy doesn’t excuse bad behavior, but it does allow you to approach the situation with compassion, making forgiveness easier.

Conquer Your Fear

Holding onto anger and resentment might feel like it gives you power or protects you from future hurt, but in reality, it does the opposite. Resentment creates distance in relationships and blocks healing. It builds walls rather than offering protection and can make future conversations harder. Letting go of anger doesn’t mean losing your strength; it means finding peace and moving forward with clarity. Freeing yourself from negative emotions will allow you to create space for healthier communication and happiness in the relationship.

Let It Go

Forgiveness requires releasing your pain. While this may be difficult, it’s essential for your emotional well-being. Identify why it’s hard to forgive, then be willing to let go. As you work through your emotions, release any resentment, anger, or hurt. Though forgiving someone who has deeply hurt you can be challenging, doing so frees you from emotional burdens and restores your peace of mind. Forgiveness allows you to move forward, enabling personal and relationship growth.

Show Accountability

Mistakes happen, and there is no shame in making them. It’s essential to forgive yourself and your partner to move beyond challenges. Mistakes are opportunities for growth, and forgiveness fosters trust and accountability. It reduces resentment and ends the blame game. Taking responsibility for your actions—whether you were hurt or caused hurt—builds trust over time. If you’ve wronged your partner, own up to it and apologize sincerely. A genuine apology acknowledges the pain caused and shows a commitment to change. While an apology doesn’t erase the hurt, it demonstrates your desire to improve and make things right.

Forgiveness is a journey, not a destination. By embracing honest communication, self-reflection, empathy, and accountability, you can release pain and resentment. This process strengthens relationships, allowing love and trust to flourish again. With patience and mutual effort, forgiveness paves the way for a brighter future together.

Love, they say, knows no bounds. But what happens when distance creeps in and love is put to the test? Long-distance relationships are a modern-day testament to the strength of love in the face of physical separation. Even in the most loving relationships, infidelity can shatter trust.

Finding out that your long-distance partner is unfaithful is heartbreaking, tearing apart the strong connection you share. So, how do you find out if your long-distance partner is being unfaithful? Delhi’s leading relationship and marriage counselor, Shivani Misri Sadhoo shares a few warning signs in this article.

What are some of the terrible signs that show your long-distance is being unfaithful?

Couples therapist Shivani Sadhoo, says, you may identify via the following things:

Inconsistent Communication

When your long-distance partner begins to dodge regular communication, it could indicate something amiss. While occasional busy spells are understandable, consistent avoidance raises concerns. A shift from frequent calls and intentional planning of dates to fewer interactions or vague excuses hints at potential infidelity. In successful long-distance relationships, consistent communication is vital, and deviations from this norm should prompt investigation into underlying issues or potential unfaithfulness.

Gets angry often

When your partner starts getting easily irritated or annoyed, especially over small things, it could be a sign that something’s up. In a long-distance relationship, it’s important to stay connected and understanding. But if your partner suddenly seems short-tempered, it might mean they’re not happy in the relationship.

It’s like they’ve lost their patience with you, which isn’t normal if they used to be sweet and patient before. This change in behavior could mean they’re emotionally checked out or even looking for a way out. And if they’re not feeling connected to you anymore, they might be turning to someone else for that emotional support. So, when they start acting differently, it’s worth paying attention to what’s really going on.

Frequent Technical Glitches

If your long-distance partner keeps encountering technical issues whenever you try to connect with them, it could be a sign that something isn’t right. Think about it: every time you’re excited to talk, their phone mysteriously runs out of battery, or their internet suddenly becomes unreliable. It’s like they’re always finding an excuse to avoid having meaningful conversations with you. You might notice a pattern where they blame their device for problems like a faulty camera or microphone, making it difficult for you to video or voice call them.

And when you question them about it, they might even claim their account was hacked or is behaving strangely, adding another layer of suspicion. But what if these “accidental” tech issues happen all the time? It starts to feel less like bad luck and more like a deliberate attempt to avoid you. It’s painful to consider, but maybe these constant technical glitches are covering up something deeper – like your partner being unfaithful.

Always Busy

Earlier, your partner used to make time for you effortlessly, adjusting their schedule just to chat with you freely. But now, it feels like they’re always busy, never having a moment for you. It might seem like you’re constantly trying to connect, but they always seem to have something more important going on. When one partner becomes consistently too occupied for quality time together, it can trigger doubts about fidelity in a long-distance relationship.

Contradictory Explanation

Pay close attention to any inconsistencies or contradictions in your long-distance partner’s narratives. If you notice that their explanations don’t align or if you catch them in lies, it could be a clear indication that they are hiding something from you. Trust your instincts and be vigilant about red flags, no matter how seemingly insignificant.

For instance, if a friend informs you that they saw your partner in a compromising situation with someone else, it’s crucial to address the issue. When you confront your partner about your suspicions, be wary if they attempt to change the topic or deflect the question. This behaviour may suggest they are avoiding the truth, especially if they consistently sidestep the issue.

Now that you’re aware of these warning signs, stay vigilant in your long-distance relationship. Consistent communication, understanding changes in behavior, and addressing inconsistencies are key to maintaining trust and addressing potential issues before they escalate.