Marriage Counsellor and Psychologist Shivani Misri Sadhoo

The first month of marriage is a unique and exciting time for newlyweds. It’s a period of adjustment, discovery, and laying the foundation for a strong, enduring relationship. Long-lasting couples understand the importance of this time and take specific steps to ensure their bond remains strong as they move forward together. Here’s a look at what successful couples often do during their first month of marriage to set the tone for a lifetime of happiness as shared by Delhi NCR’s top couple’s therapist Shivani Misri Sadhoo in this blog.

What things do long-lasting couples do during the first month of their marriage?

According to marriage counselor Shivani Sadhoo, things long-lasting couples do in their first month of marriage are:

Open Communication

One of the most critical aspects of a healthy marriage is communication. Long-lasting couples make it a priority to talk openly and honestly with each other. They share their thoughts, feelings, and concerns, ensuring that they are on the same page. This openness helps prevent misunderstandings and fosters a sense of trust and security in the relationship.

During the first month, these couples often establish communication patterns that will carry them through their marriage. Whether it’s setting aside time each day to talk about their day or discussing their future goals and dreams, they make communication a cornerstone of their relationship.

Spending Quality Time Together

The first month of marriage is a special time to build memories and deepen the bond. Long-lasting couples make the most of this period by spending quality time together. This doesn’t necessarily mean elaborate dates or expensive outings. It can be as simple as cooking together, taking walks, or enjoying a movie night at home.

By prioritizing time together, they strengthen their connection and create a strong foundation for their marriage. This quality time helps them understand each other better and reinforces the love and commitment they share.

Setting Boundaries and Expectations

Every couple comes into marriage with their own set of expectations and boundaries. Long-lasting couples understand the importance of discussing and setting these early on. Whether it’s about finances, household responsibilities, or social interactions, having clear boundaries helps prevent conflicts later on.

During the first month, successful couples take the time to discuss their expectations for the relationship. They talk about their roles, responsibilities, and how they will handle challenges that may arise. This proactive approach helps ensure that both partners feel respected and understood.

Fostering Physical Intimacy

Physical intimacy is a vital aspect of a marriage. Long-lasting couples prioritize this aspect of their relationship from the very beginning. They understand that physical affection is not just about physical intimacy but also about maintaining a close, loving connection.

During the first month, these couples often explore each other’s needs and desires, ensuring that both partners feel satisfied and cherished. They make time for intimacy, whether through affectionate gestures, cuddling, or simply being close to each other. This focus on physical connection helps build a strong emotional bond that lasts throughout their marriage.

Being Supportive and Encouraging

Marriage is a partnership, and long-lasting couples know the importance of supporting and encouraging each other. In the first month, they make a conscious effort to be each other’s biggest cheerleaders. Whether it’s in their personal goals, careers, or hobbies, they offer support and encouragement.

This mutual support helps build a strong foundation of trust and respect. It shows that they are committed to each other’s growth and happiness, which is crucial for a lasting relationship.

Maintaining a Sense of Humor

Marriage comes with its challenges, and long-lasting couples know the importance of maintaining a sense of humor. They don’t take themselves too seriously and find ways to laugh together, even when things don’t go as planned.

In the first month, these couples often face minor challenges as they adjust to married life. Instead of letting these moments cause tension, they use humor to diffuse potential conflicts and keep things light-hearted. This ability to laugh together strengthens their bond and makes it easier to navigate the ups and downs of marriage.

The first month of marriage is a crucial time for newlyweds to set the tone for their future together. Long-lasting couples understand this and take specific steps to ensure their relationship remains strong and healthy. By focusing on open communication, spending quality time together, setting boundaries, fostering physical intimacy, being supportive, and maintaining a sense of humor, they build a solid foundation for a lifetime of happiness. These actions, taken in the early days of marriage, pave the way for a fulfilling and enduring relationship

Relationships are built on trust, communication, and understanding. However, even the healthiest relationships encounter disagreements. While it’s normal to have differences of opinion, turning these differences into a battle over who’s right can be harmful. When couples focus more on winning an argument rather than resolving the issue, it can create unnecessary tension and weaken the bond between them.

This article from one of the top couples therapists in Delhi and Gurgaon, Shivani Misri Sadhoo, explores why fighting over who’s right is the wrong approach in relationships, and offers insights on how to handle disagreements more constructively.

Does Being Right Really Matter?

In the heat of an argument, it’s easy to get caught up in proving that you’re right. But is being right more important than maintaining harmony in your relationship? When both partners are determined to win an argument, the focus shifts from resolving the issue to asserting dominance. This can lead to hurt feelings, resentment, and a breakdown in communication.

Answer: No, being right doesn’t necessarily matter in the grand scheme of a relationship. What’s more important is understanding your partner’s perspective and finding a solution that works for both of you. Prioritizing the relationship over your need to be right can lead to healthier communication and a stronger connection.

What Are the Consequences of Trying to Win an Argument?

When you’re fixated on winning an argument, the relationship becomes a battlefield where each partner is more concerned with defending their position than listening to the other. This can lead to a cycle of conflict where neither partner feels heard or valued.

Answer: The consequences of trying to win an argument can be damaging to the relationship. It can lead to feelings of alienation, as one partner may feel dismissed or invalidated. Over time, this can erode trust and intimacy, making it harder to resolve future conflicts. Instead of strengthening the relationship, the constant need to be right can create emotional distance and resentment.

Why Fighting Over Who’s Right Is the Wrong Approach?

Fighting over who’s right in a relationship is counterproductive because it shifts the focus from collaboration to competition. Here’s why this approach is harmful:

It Undermines Mutual Respect: In a healthy relationship, both partners should feel respected and valued. When you’re constantly trying to prove that you’re right, it can make your partner feel disrespected and undervalued. This can lead to a power struggle, where one partner feels the need to assert dominance over the other. Over time, this dynamic can erode the mutual respect that’s essential for a healthy relationship.

It Creates Emotional Distance: Arguments that focus on who’s right often leave both partners feeling frustrated and disconnected. When you’re more concerned with winning an argument than understanding your partner’s feelings, it creates emotional distance. This distance can make it harder to connect on an emotional level, leading to a breakdown in communication and intimacy.

It Hinders Problem-Solving: The goal of any disagreement should be to find a solution that works for both partners. However, when the focus is on who’s right, it becomes difficult to find common ground. Instead of working together to solve the problem, each partner becomes entrenched in their position, making it harder to reach a resolution. This can lead to unresolved issues that continue to cause conflict in the relationship.

It Damages Emotional Safety: Emotional safety is crucial in a relationship, as it allows both partners to be open and vulnerable with each other. When arguments revolve around being right, it can create an environment where one or both partners feel unsafe expressing their true feelings. This lack of emotional safety can lead to bottled-up emotions, which can eventually result in more significant conflicts or emotional withdrawal.

It Reduces the Joy of Being Together: A relationship should be a source of joy, comfort, and companionship. However, when disagreements turn into battles over who’s right, it can drain the joy out of being together. Constant arguments and the pressure to be right can make the relationship feel more like a competition than a partnership. This can diminish the overall happiness and satisfaction in the relationship, making it feel more like a burden than a source of love and support.

By considering these additional points, it becomes even clearer why focusing on who’s right is the wrong approach in a relationship. The key is to prioritize understanding, respect, and emotional safety to maintain a strong and healthy connection with your partner.